A/n: I've been wanting to do a Neighbors!AU, but at first I was unsure. Should I make them childhood friends, or new neighbors? I felt like I could have a lot of fun with both, but this is what eventually stuck out to me. On that note, it's been a long while since I've posted anything, and I apologize if I am no yet fully up to my writing groove.

Warnings: Some mentions of marijuana and drinking, sex, and swearing, hence the M-rating.

Disc.: No, I don't own Hetalia.

Room 13B

Some might call him delusional.

In fact, that was exactly what his younger brother had called him immediately following Gilbert's own colorful tirade as he was in the process of moving all of his belongings out of his sibling's home. Honestly, though, what kind of brother kicked out his own family? So what if his little boy toy was moving in? So what if Gilbert didn't have a "real job"? He had pretty much raised that kid, god dammit, and he wanted a little respect.

A little voice in his head mockingly asked him if he was deserving of this respect. Sure, he'd protected the little brat, but what did he have to show for it now? He was pushing thirty, barely made enough out of his free-lancing to afford to eat, didn't have a girlfriend, and now, even his own flesh and blood had had enough of him.

Luckily for the albino, he didn't focus on things like introspection for very long, instead reverting to his previous method of being offended. He took out his anger in the door in front of him, pulling out his new key and jamming it into the lock with more force than was appropriate.

Anyway, Ludwig would be calling him up in a week, tops, begging him to come back. In fact, Gilbert had told him so as he was heading out the door.

In turn, he earned that stupid delusional title.

Which he wasn't. He was awesome, and he in no way deserved this.

Alas, here he was, standing in the entryway of his new home, a cheap, rundown apartment complex that had a sudden vacancy right when he needed it. Room 13B. The movers had been kind enough to leave every single box in the living room, since Gilbert had not bothered marking them accordingly, and he eyed the mountain of luggage wearily, wondering if he should at least unpack his blankets before hunting down the closest bar and drowning his misery with beer. Because it would really suck to have to unpack his entire bedding after getting shit-faced.

Now that he thought about it, he probably had too much stuff for this tiny place. Blowing snowy hair out of his eyes, he rolled up his sleeves and began trudging through mess. Pillows and blankets were his main goal, but he rationalized finding things like his toothbrush, phone charger, and some clothes were also pretty important. He couldn't help but think that this was a giant waste of time, though. Things would be back to normal in no time, and he'd be out of this hell hole and back in his guest room where he belonged.

As he was contemplating this, he realized the box he was rummaging through was for the kitchen (mostly) and shoved it aside. His hands froze in midair towards another, but a scurrying from the corner of his eye caught his attention. Turning his head, the man let out an ear-piercing shriek.

–

Matthew Williams was often described as invisible. That is, when he was remembered, at least. Over the years, the young man had learned to use this to his advantage, but it also came with many drawbacks. The most obvious being the fact he was so overwhelmingly plain it was almost physically painful.

It wasn't his looks—he was mistaken enough for his popular twin brother that he no longer had to worry about that, no. It was just him. There was nothing notable about him. He was, to put it gently, boring. In fact, the most interesting thing about him was probably the rundown apartment complex he lived in.

Though he'd only lived there for one out of his twenty years, it was the homiest place Matthew had ever been because it was his and he felt like he belonged for once. Sure, it was falling apart, and there was no air conditioning, but there were constantly new faces coming in and out, new stories and culture and wonders. He was on a first-name basis with most of the neighbors who had lived in the building for more than a few months, though they did still struggle to remember him sometimes. Matt didn't take offense to it, however. It was just him.

Tonight was pretty quiet. He'd seen movers bringing up some boxes just across the hall from him, but he tamped down his curiosity, knowing how tiring a move could be. Perhaps he could bring something over in the morning to scope out this new face, as he was sure the others would be intrigued as well. For now, he'd put on a movie, maybe smoke a bowl, and get some sleep.

At least, that was the plan until a blood-curdling scream shot through the complex.

–

Gilbert had somehow managed to climb atop the precarious stack of boxes and glared down at his mighty opponent. Brown, furry, and probably the size of his fucking fist, a spider crawled around the room like he owned the place, effectively pinning Gilbert with just his threatening appearance.

Now, Gilbert was no coward. He'd been in fights, was a fireman for a few months, did some cliff-jumping as a teenager, and would probably do even more dangerous things well into his adulthood. Put him up against a spider? Fuck. No. They were freaks of nature, the bigger the nastier, and this one in particular was intruding on his brand new space. To make matters worse, Gilbert's phone was too far to reach and he knew no one who lived nearby.

He couldn't stay here, that was it. This spider was only the beginning, it was sending him a message—

There was a panicked pounding on the door. "H-Hello? I'm your neighbor—Matthew—I heard screaming, are you alright?"

Gilbert was not religious, but he profusely thanked every god he could possibly think of. "Holy fuck, get in here and kill it!"

Apparently that was enough of an invitation, because a few moments later the albino caught sight of another man. He was tall, with curly, shoulder-length blond hair and eyes a surprising shade a violet. Though, Gilbert had no place to talk about strange eye colors. His skin was tanned from the sun, dark brows furrowed and Gilbert almost had the audacity to ask why he looked so uptight before he remembered why he invited this stranger into his apartment in the first place and shrieked, "The beast! Slay the beast!" He flailed in the direction he last saw it, but the man—Matthew?— only carefully approached him.

"Hey, wait—don't move around so much you're gonna—"

His fortress of boxes tumbled, Gilbert going right along with them. It all happened pretty fast, and Gilbert let out some pretty impressive language on the way down as all of his belongings flew in random directions, their crates destroyed. The elder brace himself for impact, confused when it was taking so long.

Crimson orbs opened to reveal his guest had caught him in his (admittedly strong) arms. Well then, Gilbert pride was going to be reduced to dust at the end of the night. Some dude he'd never met had barged into his home after hearing what he must have thought was Gilbert's outright murder only to save him with a fucking princess carry. He was not one to easily embarrass, but this—

"THERE IT IS!" Gilbert cried as the creature darted across his floor once more. Matthew, for his part, asked no questions, actually sighed before he put the other man down, grabbed a Tupperware container that had fallen out of one of the many felled boxes of the evening, and dropped it over the spider within moments.

Silence came over them now that the immediate danger was out of the way, and then, "...Did you really scream like that over a spider?"

Gilbert could feel his ears grow hot, and his only consolation was that the rest of the apartment hadn't come to see what all the ruckus was about as well. "I—ugh. I fucking hate bugs."

"Spiders are good for bugs, though; they eat them," the boy said, kneeling on the ground. Gilbert couldn't bring himself to watch, but he must have fiddled with something because when he looked back at him, the spider was still trapped in the container, a CD case covering the top, secure in Matthew's hand. "She actually belongs to one of the tenants. I'll return her."

"She, huh," Gilbert commented, squinting at the little monster. "So it's a lady spider. That means it can have babies. I vote we kill it."

The blond frowned at him. "Technically, she's lived here longer than you, so she holds priority, you know?" Seeming to have caught Gilbert's aghast stare, he quickly changed the subject. "Um, I mentioned it before but I'm your new neighbor, Matthew Williams. I live across the hall. It's nice to meet you."

This kid was kind of weird, but Gilbert had to admit he was also a little hilarious, and he had basically saved his life. In fact, he could be just what Gilbert needed to survive this ordeal; someone to watch out for him in this new place. Grinning, he answered. "Gilbert, pleasure's all mine."

Not long after, Matthew excused himself to go return the spider to its owner, to which Gilbert suggested once more that they exterminate it. Matthew had effectively ignored him, reminding the albino that he lived just across the hall if he needed anything and the boy was gone, spawn-of-Satan taken with him.

By this point, the albino was way to tired to even contemplate going out to barhop. He'd make his bed and then knock the fuck out. Perhaps tomorrow he could get his neighbor to help him unpack, or maybe he'd call up Francis and Antonio and make them do it.

Nah, he didn't really want to think about it a lot, but he did want to see that Matthew kid again. Gilbert wasn't exactly "boyfriend material", didn't really have a "type". He just kind of... liked people. And he liked Matthew. It was pretty awesome how he barged into his house to save him, after all. Even if he did totally emasculation him, at least he was cool doing it.

Gilbert shrugged to himself. Perhaps this was what his brother meant by "delusional"?
–

A/n: This... got out of hand. Please drop a reviewso I can get the next part up ASAP c: