Author: QueenofIron
Summary: Yinsen knew that there was no way he could escape from that cave. He knew that the armour his fellow prisoner was building couldn't get upgraded in the right time. He could sense it. And this is why, he wrote the said prisoner a letter for when he will get home.
Disclaimer: Well, now do I really have to write that? I do not own any of the characters written here. The only thing I own is my Iron Man Blu-Ray and a few Iron Man 3 posters. And that's it. If I owned any of those characters then I'd be somewhere in Malibu, writing scripts for another dozen of Iron Man films.
"No gang signs," Tony warned as he moved closer to the young solider, enough to can be caught in the photo as well. Seeing the disappointment in the young man's eyes as he lowered his hand, the billionaire glanced at him before turning back to the camera. "No, throw it up, I'm kidding. Peace, yeah, I love peace. I'd be out of job with peace." He joked as he put on a small grin for the camera then.. BOOM!
Tony Stark jumped upright and awake from the comfortable bed as the sound of explosions kept replaying in his ears. His crazed eyes scanned the dark room and suddenly a feeling of unease settled in his chest. What if he didn't make it? What if he was still in that cave and his creation failed him? Or what if he just fell unconscious on the dunes of sand in the desert and the whole salvation part was only a trick his mind played on him?
"Tony?" A groggily, yet familiar voice echoed from somewhere on the other side of the room. Turning his head towards the voice source, the billionaire made up the form of a man. A fairly well build man who was wearing a military shirt and wait.. Glancing down at his own clothes, Tony noticed that he was wearing a lousy blue military shirt as well which was of his best friend. That was when it hit him.
He was in Germany for two days now, rescued from Afghanistan by four. He spent two days at the military base from Afghanistan and in the care of a few doctors, which faces he couldn't remember because he slept most of the time. For the past two days he was in Germany after Rhodey informed him that he still needed to be checked up and that by some specialists before he could go back to the States and make an official return.
"Yeah, what is it?" He asked casually as he laid once again on the comfortable bed, tucking the pillow underneath his head carefully.
"What is it!?" James Rhodes mocked with an arched eyebrow as he sat up in his own bed. "You were the one that woke up screaming and trashing around." The man arched an eyebrow as he noticed the other's hand tighten on the pillow. "I'm the one who should be asking, what was that?"
"Nothin'." Tony mumbled as his eyes lowered to the ground, his fingers still toying with the ends of the mattress. "Just go back to sleep, Rhodey." He added as he let his eyes drop to a close.
There was a long silence between the two men before the sound of footsteps came closer to the billionaire's bedside which only added to the man's shame and embarrassment. "Tones," Rhodey began as he reached inside his shirt and took out something. Something that was very much alike with an envelope. "Read this." He added as he handed the other the envelope.
Taking it between his hands cautiously, the billionaire glanced up at his best friend, only then noticing that the man was currently wearing a leather jacket over his military shirt. Noticing Tony's attempt to speak out his confusion, the colonel held up a palm with a shake of his head.
"You woke up screaming that name." He began and gave a sigh as he took a step away from the bed-edge. "The doctors found this sewed in the fabric of your shirt when they changed your clothes. From what it seems, it is a letter. I thought that you would like to read it. I didn't open it, is all yours" He explained as he took another step back. "I'm going to take some fresh air, I won't take long." And with that, the colonel walked out of the hotel room, leaving the billionaire alone with his letter.
Reaching out towards the night table, Tony turned on the small and yellowish lamp before settling back on the bed with his back rested against the nearest wall. Who would've sewed a letter in the back of his shirt? And not any shirt, the shirt he was with in Afghanistan. That shirt that was most likely as a sack of potatoes for him than a real shirt. Shrugging his shoulders, he opened the envelope carefully and took out its contest.
"My farazand,*"
The familiar handwriting made a lump raise in the billionaire's throat as his fingers began to skim over the surface of the poorly yellowish looking piece of paper.
"If you are reading this, which I'm totally sure you will, that means that I'm not between the living ones any longer."
Which is because of me, he thought as he swallowed the lump from his throat and blinked away the familiar sting from his eyes.
"Probably you are wondering why and when I wrote this. Why? Isn't it obvious, farazand? I wrote this for you, to lighten your mind and way somehow, as much as I can. To try to show you that you are much more than a mere weapon producer. Than a man who sells the sticks. When? You, my farazand, you were exhausted when I wrote you this. You were holding on that piece of metal like if your life was hanging on it, and somehow it was."
Tony's lips curled into a sad smile at the sight of those words. It should have saved our life not only mine, he thought as his hand clutched the paper even more tightly than before.
"The months I spent with you in the cave eased my pain somehow. You reminded me of my own children, the enthusiasm in your eyes at each thing you did or learnt. Or the anger and bitterness you showed each time one of those men showed up in our little sanctuary. You reminded me of my son, even if he was way smaller when he died. But, I'm sure than when he would have grown up, he would've turned up having the same behaviour as yours."
Tony gave another sigh at the sight of those words – at the way they sounded in his mind and the way he imagined Yinsen saying them. He could imagine those brown eyes getting watery behind his reading glasses at the subject. He imagined how the man's fingers would move nervously, a habit Tony noticed that he had whenever he was nervous or angry.
"I don't know how long it'll be until you'll wake up from yet another nightmare. Which means that I have to make this quick despite the fact that I'd like to write more. But I know, that I can't write this in front of you. I know that if you'd see this then you'd give up on your plans and your chance of salvation. I can't let you do that. I can't take away the future from you even if it means giving up mine."
Tony's hand reached up, fingers curling lightly as he wiped away a single tear from the corner of his eye. Maybe he should stop reading it? But then, he could never find out what Yinsen wanted to tell him but couldn't. Holding the paper tighter between his fingers, he drew in a deep breath as he continued reading.
"I know that when you'll read this letter, you'll be safe. I want you to know that I'm happy because of it. That I don't regret for a second the fact that I helped you to build that armour, nor that I saved your life when they bought you half dead and forced me to put that thing in your chest. I want you to know that I don't regret the fact that I gave up my life to save yours. The world could easily make it without me, but it wouldn't make it as good without you.
I'm once again, drifting away from the topic, and the time is drifting away on me as well. What I wanted to tell you, was that I don't want you to blame yourself for my death. I wouldn't have wanted to live without my family even if I did survive, thing that won't happen. I want you to know that those three months with you showed me that the tabloids were wrong. That the man I've seen at that science convention, wasn't the real Tony Stark. The real Tony Stark was with me in that cave, suffering yet finding solutions to save not only himself but the others too. That is the Tony Stark I know and I'm proud of. Because yes, you made me proud, farazand.
Don't let yourself down once again. Do not search comfort into alcohol or hide yourself away from the people that truly love you. Find who did this to you and make them pay for what they do, bring them in front of the justice, make the people be proud of you.
Your heart might be destroyed but you are fully aware of the fact that it is only an organ, right? That the phrase 'a heart of gold' is not referring to the heart itself but to the soul. And you, farazand, you have a heart of gold. Do not let any one else tell you otherwise.
You are stirring.. It means that I should stop writing.. It means that you have another nightmare, one of the many. Don't let them continue, push them away, you know that you can do that. Don't be afraid to tell your trustworthy people about how you feel. The life is too short to waste it.
Don't waste it, Anthony.. Don't waste your life.."
The dampness around his eyes made the billionaire blink quickly in attempt to push away the remaining tears. Yinsen was proud of him. He could sense it in each word that was written with the poorly pocket pencil the older man had. He could sense it in the voice that was playing over and over again in his mind. He could see it in the word that was written down on the crappy piece of paper. Folding the paper into its initial form once again, the billionaire let his lips curl up into a slight smile.
"Thank you, Yinsen.. Thank you for saving my life." He whispered before slipping the paper back in its envelope with a sigh. If he could have saved Yinsen.. If he could've.. No, Stark, sometimes there's no way out. Sometimes you just have to face it. That's the life, it isn't always as you want it to be, he heard Yinsen's voice in his mind and nodded his chin to self as he shut off the lamp and laid his head on the pillow once again and for the first time in three months, he managed to sleep without another nightmare.
*Farazand means child in Dari for those who didn't know it.
That was a between the scenes one-shot, the reason why Tony created the Iron Man armour and why he shut down the weapon manufacturing division from Stark Industries. I wanted Tony to have something left from Yinsen and I always thought that Yinsen knew that the armour wouldn't be ready in time and this is why he wrote Tony a letter.
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