This is a Mary-Sue parody. *evil laugh* You're right, I used the title to trick you! *cough* Ummm, actually it's an experiment, but ah well. Remind me to change this authors note when I add the next chapter, ya? Well, Bye then! Remember to read and review!

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"Oof!"

Legolas groaned and rolled the heavy object that had just fallen on him to the side. To his surprise, the object also groaned. Looking closer, he realized that it was actually a human girl. He frowned and pulled her into a sitting position, noting the strange material her clothing was made of. A few feet away he heard a similar moan. Glancing over confirmed his suspicions-another girl was rising to her feet and looking around warily.

"Akki? Where are you?"

Legolas coughed, and the girl spun around. She too was wearing the strange material, which made a 'trenchcoat…' that flared out impressively in the slight wind her spin had caused. She stared at him, her eyes widening. At the same time he felt his heart falter. She was amazing, with black hair and eyes the colour of blood… Legolas shook his head violently. What was wrong with him? Why was he suddenly thinking such strange thoughts? He looked back down at the unconscious girl in his arms. She too was beautiful with hair that was a dark red. "Who are you?" he murmured, gazing at her.

"I'm Seira. That's Akki."

Legolas glanced up sharply, surprised the other 'maiden…' had heard him. He stood, still supporting the one called 'Akki'.

"Where have you two come from?"

This time Seira did not answer. She seemed to be thinking about something. Finally she said, slowly, "I think… we must've… used a portal of some sort. If we really are, that is."

"Are what?"

Once again she hesitated, then walked over and peered up at him. "Are you Legolas? The prince of Mirkwood?"

Legolas was struck once more by her beauty, then shook his head at the thought; she immediately backed off, looking disappointed. Noticing this, he quickly nodded. "Yes, I am. How do you know me? I wouldn't think I am that fam"

He was cut off by a groan as the girl in his arms turned and mumbled something. Seira sighed. "Here, I'll take her." She pulled Akki over and promptly dropped her, muttering about girls who were smart enough to figure out how to get to Middle-Earth, but not smart enough not to get knocked unconscious. Legolas was about to protest at this lack of care when Seira slapped her hands over Akki's nose and mouth and pushed down. Fascinated, he watched as Akki started twitching.

"Should you-" He was cut off again as Akki's gray eyes snapped open and she started shrieking.

"Damn it D-chan! If you're gonna try to kill me at least give me a chance! I was sleeping!" She paused for breath, then stopped short. "Ei-Seira? Are we…" Seira nodded. "Yes! Yeah! Hahahaha! See? I told ya I'd get us here! Nothing can stop the almighty Co-Akki once she gets an idea!" She continued in this way for several minutes while Seira 'sweatdropped…'. Finally Akki ran out of breath again and took the chance to look around more. She turned and stared. Legolas shifted uncomfortably; he was not used to being so obviously stared at, and he was sure he should be getting back to the rest of the fellowship soon; he had said he'd only be gone a few minutes.

"Akki, that's Legolas. You… fell on him." Seira seemed to be trying to avoid laughing, although she couldn't prevent a snicker from breaking through. Akki, however, had gone ashen. She glanced back desperately at Legolas.

"I didn't, did I?" He nodded and her face fell. (Not literally of course. That would be just weird.) "Oh. I'm… I'm sorry. I really didn't mean to. I was writing the Mary-Sue and I figured I would end up in Middle-Earth, but I didn't think about where or anything because it just seemed like if I was a Mary-Sue I would be perfect and I couldn't do anything embarrassing like that and" She looked so anxious for some sign of forgiveness that Legolas laughed.

"It's fine. You did no harm." Now his tone turned serious. "But I'm afraid I must leave. I was with… friends and I was only to be gone for a few minutes." He turned, expecting some protest. What he did not expect was…

"Wait! You're going to destroy the ring, aren't you? Yeah, you are. Where are we right now? Probably just left Rivendell…" He turned back and stared. She was nodding to herself. "And I don't think there's anywhere like this after Moria, and we're certainly not in the Chara-Ca-the-the mountain place, so ow! What was that for?"


Seira had stepped on Akki's foot. "No one's supposed to know about the quest. Do you want to get us killed?" she whispered.

Unfortunately, her warning came too late. Legolas narrowed his eyes and seized Akki's wrist. "What did you say?"

On Akki's behalf, she at least had the sense to look frightened; however, she either did not have enough sense to attempt an escape, or was too afraid to. Whichever case may be true, this, and her lack of words, is most likely what saved the pair. Legolas, unsure of what to do, also grabbed Seira and led them back to the Fellowship's camp.

Aragorn frowned. "As much as I hate to do this, they could be spies of Sauron. KILL THEM!!!!" Legolas could see his friend straining against something, but there was no time to notice as he was once more victim to a girl falling on top of him.

Once more he said 'Oof!'.

This time the girl was not knocked unconscious. She quickly rose to her feet and looked around wildly then smiled and giggled. "Oh my gosh! You guys are like here too! Wow! That is like soooo cool!"

Akki and Seira glanced hesitantly at each other. "Ummm… Ra" Akki coughed. "I mean Beatrix?" The blonde nodded, her bluver (A/N: that's blue-silver mixed together! It's my colour so don't make fun of it!) eyes watering with joy. Akki quickly backed away until she was behind Seira, who was also looking rather unpleased.

"So… Beatrix. How did"

Beatrix turned and hugged Seira, cutting her off effectively, since without air, you cannot speak. "You wouldn't believe it Seira! I was like walking through the woods one day? And it was like right now." She gasped, covering her mouth as if 'she had just said some great revelation…'.

Legolas once again shook his head, but before the first thought had left, another entered. 'Personally, I've always thought that it looked like they were catching bugs in their mouth when they did that. Ya know?' Legolas whipped his head around wildly, attempting to find the source of the voice. He saw no one except the fellowship and the three girls. 'We have to get rid of them,' he thought. Then he remembered. Hadn't Aragorn mentioned killing them? He had at first thought the command a bit harsh, but with this new threat… "Aragorn?"

The ranger glanced over.

"You said to kill them?"

Aragorn once more seemed to be struggling with himself, but this time it seemed he was against only himself, and not the 'outside force that seemed to have appeared…'. Legolas didn't argue. The voice that was not his own was correct. It was like some outside force was controlling their minds and bodies. Finally Aragorn managed to grit out, "Yes." He bit his lip, but it was too late. "KILL THEM!!!!"

The girls jumped at this outburst. Seira, apparently the most sane of the company, held up her hands and began speaking quickly yet quietly. "We don't mean any harm. We can see the future and know of your quest. Killing us would deal a great blow to your assets."

The other two girls blinked, then Akki seemed to pick up on the idea and continued. "You see, we have books that tell us of what's going to happen and… I read them so that's why I knew about the ow!" Not for the last time, Seira had dug her heel into Akki's toe to prevent any more words from spilling out. Akki finally settled for simply glaring at her partner, both too busy watching Beatrix for signs of comprehension. They never came.

Instead, the blonde haired, bluver eyed beauty sauntered up to Boromir, twirling her hair absentmindedly. "So Boromir… you're like, one of the boys? And you have like, a sword?"

Boromir nodded. Legolas expected him to protest against the idiocy of this comment, but instead he merely smiled. "We will not kill them. They have done no wrong."

The rest of the fellowship was shocked. To hear Boromir accept this idiot for a quest such as the one they were one was worrisome. What strange power was it that could change a person so completely in just a few seconds? Still, Legolas couldn't help but be relieved that the other to girls would be protected by that statement as well. Glancing to his left, he noticed Gimli staring at the red haired newcomer.

"Her name is Akki, correct?"

Legolas nodded.

"There's something about her…" Gimli left, leaving his friend thoroughly confused. A quick look at the hobbits proved that they had no more idea than he. What was happening to them?