The Beginning

Not in specific chapters.

I wake from a terrorizing nightmare and the sheets are drenched. I crawl into bed with my mother, violently shaking as the reoccurring dream threatens to force its way into my consciousness. My eyes droop heavily and I struggle to keep them from closing. The only thing that keeps them open is the fact that I don't want to relive those horrific moments ever again. My sister, Katniss is tangled in a ball of sheets, which could only be from the thrashing due to a bad dream. Almost every person in District 12 will have had nightmares and woken a family member in the process. After all, the reaping is only the worst possible day of the year.

I cradle my adorable cat, Buttercup in my arms, knowing that he will be the only one to provide comfort to me. As I stroke the fur between his eyes, I examine my mother's exhausted face. She resembles me with her flowing blonde hair, sky blue eyes and pale skin. Almost everyone from our district has dark hair and olive skin, my mother and myself are the only exceptions. My mother has dark circles under her eyes from sleepless nights after my fathers passing. The wrinkles are more prominent, and her lips seem to slightly form a frown. I wonder if she will ever become the young, radiant person that I once knew her to be.

Dawn is approaching and I know that Katniss will be leaving soon to see her best friend, Gale in the woods. I close my eyes and think of the one thing that I know can still make me happy. My father. I think of his olive skin, dark hair and grey eyes. He looked like most of those living in the Seam. Except he had one special quality that others do not posses. He was always courageous, daring, gentle, kind, understanding and humble. But he had the voice of an angel. Even the birds stopped to listen, and they rarely stop for anyone. One of the lullabies that Katniss still sings to me while the nightmares are frequent comes to mind. My father used to sing it often, although I was still young when he died.

"Deep in the meadow, under the willow.

A bed of grass, a soft green pillow…"

This song seems to calm me, and I eventually drift off having nothing but pleasant dreams for the remainder of the night. When I wake, Katniss is gone and my mother is in the kitchen humming. I dress in simple clothes and gently comb through my tangled hair. I braid it back, just as Katniss would. I try to be more like her in every way that I can because after my father's death, she was an inspiration to everyone. I imagine what it must have been like to have to find out how to provide for your family at the age of 11. Some people may have been sympathetic giving small bits of food, but other than that we were on our own. My mother was expected to find a job and provide for us, but she couldn't deal with the pain and emptiness that she felt without my father. I remember being so skinny that my teacher had a talk with me about anorexia. Every bone in my body was very prominent, and Katniss looked the same. We made it through though, because of Katniss's strength and ability to never give up.

I sit down at our small table for breakfast. My mother has made some bread from the grain and oil, and spread my goat, Lady's cheese on it. I attempt to eat a few bites, although it feels like glue in my mouth and I can barely swallow. If it were any day but today, this meal would be delightful. However, today will be the same throughout most of the 12 disticts of Panem, except for those who celebrate and take pride in participating in the Hunger Games.

My mother goes to take a bath, and I clean up the remainder of our meal. I go outside to milk Lady and finish off the rest of my chores. I find my friend Tress sitting with her younger sister, Cali on her front porch. Tress is braiding beautiful flowers into Cali's hair so that she can look pretty for the reaping. "Take some," I say, gesturing to Lady's milk in my hands. "Thank you so much Prim, that milk is delicious," Tress says sweetly. "We all need something good on a day like today." I sigh, hoping that Cali won't have to lose her big sister. After all, she is only nine, and I'm not sure that she could make it on her own. "Tress, it won't be you," I say in an unsure voice. Although Tress has her name in the reaping five times, and you never know what could happen.

This is our first year in the reaping and I am scared to death. Your name is entered into the reaping when you are between the ages of 12 and 18. During your first year, your name is only entered once. Second, twice. And so on and so on. However, each child has the opportunity to sign up for tesserae, which means that your name is entered more times, in exchange for grain and oil each month. Katniss won't allow me to sign up for tesserae, but Tress is the eldest, so her name is in once because it has to be and four times for grain and oil for her family. I feel bad for her but am equally worried for my own safety. "Let's keep our fingers crossed," Tress replies as she steps away from her sister and leans in to hug me. "Good luck," I say in the most confident voice that I can muster. I am just turning away when she calls me back, "Oh, wait Prim! I almost forgot. I have something from my mother, for Buttercup."

She hands me a ball of blue yarn that must have cost a fortune. Her mother knits all sorts of different things and sells them at the Hob – the black market in District 12. Katniss says that it is too dangerous for me to go to the Hob by myself, although I have been a few times while Katniss trades game for other important food and materials. Once Tress's mother gave me a beautiful knit sweater in exchange for a squirrel that Katniss had shot while hunting. I don't really like to go hunting with Katniss, because I can't bring myself to kill an animal. I guess I'm just too sensitive to do anything cruel to a living thing. After all, my mother is a healer, and I inherited most of her genes and qualities, so perhaps this is one of them.

I gratefully thank Tress and give Cali a kiss on the cheek. I can tell just by looking at her that she is terrified that the Capitol will tear apart their family. I can't bear to be around the people who's children are forced into an arena to fight 23 other tributes in a horrifying death match, until one person becomes the victor. It's awful enough that they force everyone in the districts to watch kids viciously murder each other, but it is even worse that every family but one suffers a terrible loss.

I soak in the tub and let the suds wash away the dirt. I scrub every part of my body, as you must be very clean and proper at the reaping. I pat myself dry with a towel and dress in the skirt and blouse that Katniss wore for her first reaping. My mother pins the outfit because it is too big, but a part at the back still sticks out. She braids my hair into two perfect braids going down the back of my head.

"You can't worry Prim, it will only make everything worse," my mother says as she attempts to be brave. My eyes start to water and she wipes away the falling tears. I am gasping for air, but I manage "I don't want to be taken away. I can't lose you and Katniss," between sobs. "Primrose, I will not allow you to think like that. You only have your name in once and there are thousands of other names in there. Katniss has her name in 20 times, and Gale has his in 42 times. I promise that it will not be your name called," I can tell that she is trying to be strong for me and her logic is undeniable. I wipe the tears from my eyes and go to wash my face; I don't want Katniss seeing my pale skin covered with red blotches.

My mother dresses in one of the finest dresses that she owns, from when she lived with her parents who owned the apothecary shop in town. She lays out a pretty blue dress and matching shoes for Katniss, hoping that she will be pleased. Ever since my mother basically abandoned us after my father's death, Katniss has taken on the role of my mother. She used to shut my mother out completely, although I can see Katniss trying to open up to her again.

I hear the front door open and run to greet my sister. Katniss is sweaty and filthy from being in the woods. I can see that she has just been to the Hob, as she brings fish, paraffin, greens, bread, salt and strawberries. I always love to hug her right when she comes home so that I can take in all of the different scents from the forest. I can smell pine, water lilies – her and Gale have been fishing – fresh bread, Lady's cheese that I had left out for Katniss last night, and something else that I can't quite place.

Mother has filled a tub of warm water for Katniss to bathe, and she scrubs herself without refusal to my mother's kindness. As Katniss dresses, I sit at the end of the bed, cradling Buttercup in my arms. Today has been somewhat relaxing, since everyone has the day off from work until two o'clock – the public reaping.

My mother towel-dries Katniss's hair and braids it up on her head. My mother has always had very clever fingers, healer's hands. All at once, I am jealous of Katniss. She is so pretty and her hair looks amazing. I try not to sound too jealous when I say, "You look beautiful."

"And nothing like myself," Katniss replies. She gives me a loving hug, and I can feel the tears welling up in my eyes. I blink repeatedly so that they don't stream down my face again. I can't let Katniss see my fear, let her see how truly horrified I am. Not only for myself, but for Katniss as well. Just as Cali isn't ready to lose her older sister, I am not ready to lose mine either.

Katniss notices the blouse sticking out of the back of my skirt again and she says, "Tuck in your tail, little duck," as she smoothes it into place.

I giggle and give a small, "Quack," because only Katniss could ever make me laugh on a day like today.

"Quack yourself," she says laughing lightly. Katniss rarely laughs, so it makes me happy when she does. She quickly kisses the top of my head as she says, "Come on, let's eat."

We save all of the fresh food that Katniss brought home for dinner, as a celebration of sorts. Instead, we eat the bread made from the grain and oil, and drink Lady's milk.

We go to the square for the reaping at around one o'clock. Everyone must go to the reaping unless they are going to die sometime soon. I wouldn't want to stick around anyway, since the punishment is imprisonment if the officials find you.

The camera crews on top of the buildings, the bright banners, and the fear in the air only make me queasy and even more frightened. We silently sign in with the rest of the kids from our district. There are sections of rope marked off for each age. The youngest kids are at the back, the oldest at the front. I stand quietly with the other twelve year olds and search the sea of people for something to hold on to so that I don't faint.

I look for Katniss and my mother but I can't find either of them with the crowd and all of the children. Instead, I settle for standing with Tress, and linking arms with her. However, I still feel incredibly dizzy and nauseous.

, District 12's Mayor, walks up to the microphone and begins to speak.

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