I'm not even going to get into the mess of a trainwreck that was the season finale. I'm just gonna pretend it didn't happen. I just got the new Carrie Underwood CD, Blown Away, and I thought that one of the tracks was perfect for the show. It's called Good In Goodbye, and it is just a bittersweet, beautiful song. So I sat down and wrote this little songfic. Enjoy.
Disclaimer: Not mine!
IPSIPSIPSIPSIPS
Abigail Chaffee wasn't sure exactly when she made the decision, but after she did, there was an immediate sense of relief.
She waited until the right moment (well, as right as it could be) to tell him. She was sitting on the couch when he came home, and for a split-second, she couldn't do it. Then she reminded herself of all that had gone on in the past few weeks, of what had gone on during their entire relationship, and her mind was made up.
"Marshall, I need to talk to you," she said softly, but her tone left no room for argument. The faster she was able to get through this, the sooner they could both move on and be happy.
He pulled off his jacket and hung it up. "What's up, Abigail?"
She let out a deep breath and waited for him to join her on the couch. Once he was sitting beside her, she turned to face him.
"You know I love you, but…"
IPSIPSIPSIPSIPS
Four years later, Abigail Chaffee was walking along a familiar street in Albuquerque, just enjoying being alone for a little while. She had moved away from Albuquerque right after breaking off her engagement to Marshall Mann, because she couldn't stand being so close to him while the wounds were still so fresh, even if they were self-inflicted. She didn't want to risk the chance of running into him before she was ready, so she had made a fresh start in another state. But now she was back in New Mexico, and she was looking forward to seeing friends and family.
The streets were brightly lit as she walked along the sidewalk. People were laughing and talking as they walked with friends and family, and she felt comfortable in the familiar surroundings.
Then she heard it.
A few feet away, a man laughed in a way that was achingly familiar to her, and she felt her heart skip a beat in her chest.
Marshall…
There was a restaurant that he used to take her to on Saturday nights, and just outside the entrance, she saw Marshall in a crowd of people waiting to get inside.
Without thinking, she picked up her pace. She was drawn by some invisible force, and she was powerless to fight against it.
He turned his head, and she caught a glimpse of his handsome face. He looked genuinely happy, and there was a blond little girl perched happily on his broad shoulders. His eyes fell on her, and for a moment, he looked confused.
Abigail held her breath as the memories washed over her.
I heard you laughing in a crowd
Outside a restaurant we used to go to
Caught a glimpse that stopped me in my tracks
It took me back
You looked happy with that little girl
Up on your shoulders
Happy, I know where she got those crystal eyes of blue
Time's been sweet to you
At one time, they had been happy together. She really had loved him, and she was certain that he loved her. He was a good man with a caring heart, a gentle soul. He had been easy to love, even though she knew that she hadn't been easy to love at some points in their relationship.
And if it hadn't been for his partner, they could have been happy together. Truly happy. But even though it had taken a while for her to realize it, she finally understood that Mary would always come first for Marshall. He loved Mary, probably more than he had ever loved her. She knew that he loved her, at least she thought so. But his love for Mary far surpassed that.
Knowing that had allowed her to let him go, and it had allowed her to find someone who would love her the way Marshall loved Mary. And that was what she deserved.
They both deserved that. As painful as the breakup had been, and as convinced as she had been that Marshall had been the one for her, she had been wrong. She wasn't sure that she believed in the idea of soul mates and love at first sight, but if there was any truth to those ideas, she was pretty sure that Mary and Marshall were that.
Who was she to stand in the way of that?
As bad as it was
As bad as it hurt
I thank God I didn't get
What I thought that I deserved
Sometimes life leads you
Down a different road
When you're holding onto someone
That you gotta let go
Someday you'll see the reason why
Sometimes, yeah sometimes, there's good in goodbye
Marshall finally spotted her, and her heart sank when his eyes lit up.
"Abigail!"
Taking a breath, Abigail smiled and stepped forward. Marshall spoke to someone beside him, then stepped over to her. They stopped just a foot apart, and Abigail got a good look at the little girl on Marshall's shoulders. She was too young to be Mary's daughter, Norah, and she had eyes that were hauntingly familiar.
Marshall grinned at her. "This is my daughter, Sara. Sara, say hi to Abigail."
The little girl giggled and waved at her. "Hi!"
Abigail slowly returned the wave. "Nice to meet you, Sara."
Marshall looked at her hand and smiled again. "Looks like you met someone. How's that going?"
"It's going well. His name's Brian, and we've been engaged for a few months now."
"That's great! Congratulations," he enthused, showing her his left hand. "Mary and I took the plunge a few years ago." His excitement was almost palpable.
She examined the platinum band on his ring finger. "I'm happy for you, Marshall. You deserve it." She gave him a sweet smile. She had known that returning to New Mexico meant the chance of running into him, and she was starting to see that it was a good thing. They were both truly happy, even if it wasn't with each other.
"We're happy." He tickled the baby, obviously enjoying her laughter. "Mary's pregnant again, and we're rooting for a boy this time."
"That's wonderful." She looked up at the baby girl again. Sara had her chubby baby fingers buried in her father's hair, and her fearless attitude obviously came from her mother.
Marshall looked Abigail over. "You look good, Abigail. And you seem happy." He couldn't deny that her rejection of him all those years ago had hurt, but it had opened him to be with the woman he loved and would lay down his life for. Now they were married with two babies and one on the way, and his life couldn't get much better.
Abigail met his eyes, and they shared a smile. She couldn't regret the time that they had spent together, because she truly did love him. But sometimes, love wasn't enough, and she had to let him go so he could be happy, even if it hurt her in the process.
By letting him go, she had found her own happy ending with Brian. Things hadn't gone exactly the way she'd planned, but what was that old saying? Sometimes life was what happened when you were busy making plans? Something like that. Their chance meeting was bittersweet, but it had shown her how lucky she truly was. They had both ended up exactly where they were supposed to be, even if the journey there had been a painful and difficult one.
Suddenly she leaned forward and kissed his cheek gently.
I don't regret it, the time we had together
I won't forget it
But we both ended up where we belong
I guess goodbye made us strong
And yeah, I'm happy, I found somebody, too
Who makes me happy and I knew one day I'd see you
On the street
And it'd be bittersweet
As she pulled away, he gave her a curious look. "What was that for, Abigail?"
She shrugged. "I never regretted you, Marshall."
His expression softened, and after a moment, he murmured, "Same here."
"Good."
A woman's voice called out over the chatter of the people around them. "Marshall!"
Sara squealed at the familiar voice. "Mommy!"
Abigail turned to see a very pregnant Mary weaving through the crowd. Norah was walking alongside her, her tiny hand tucked into her mother's hand. She looked back at Marshall, but he was focused on Mary. In his eyes she could see a look of devotion and pure love, and she couldn't help realizing that he'd never looked at her that way. Even when they were dating, he looked at Mary like that.
Why hadn't she seen it sooner? Maybe she could have saved herself some pain and heartache. But if she had somehow known beforehand what would happen, would she have done things any differently? Probably not. She cherished the time that she and Marshall had shared, and to change any of that would be changing a part of herself.
Mary finally reached them, and she kissed Marshall deeply. Then she turned to Abigail. "Hey, detective. Long time, no see."
"It's nice to see you, too, Mary."
Mary nodded and looked at Marshall again. "Your daughter is being difficult." She handed Norah to him.
Marshall chuckled. "Why is she my daughter when she's in trouble?"
"Because you're the one who insists on reading all of those mysteries to her and lets her play Cops and Robbers."
Laughing, he leaned over and kissed his wife's temple. Then he touched her swollen belly.
Abigail watched them with a sense of sadness and new understanding. They were so much in love, and if she had stepped away sooner, they could have been together sooner. But she didn't regret a moment of it.
"Marshall?"
Marshall looked at Abigail. "Yeah, Ab?"
"I think I'm going to get out of here. It was great seeing you again."
He gave her a fond smile. "It was good to see you, too, Abigail."
They shared another look before she turned around and began to walk away.
But as bad as it was
As bad as it hurt
I thank God I didn't get
What I thought that I deserved
Sometimes life leads you
Down a different road
When you're holding onto someone
That you gotta let go
Someday you'll see the reason why
Yeah sometimes, yeah sometimes, there's good in goodbye
A few steps down the sidewalk, Abigail looked back over her shoulder. Marshall had his arm around Mary, and Norah was between both of them.
She smiled softly, watching the little family for a moment before she pulled her jacket tighter around herself. Then she continued down the sidewalk, and a sense of peace and closure washed over her.
"Be happy, Marshall."
As bad as it was
As bad as it hurt
I thank God I didn't get
What I thought that I deserved
Sometimes life leads you
Down a different road
When you're holding onto someone
That you gotta let go
Someday you'll see the reason why
Yeah someday you'll see the reason why
There's good in goodbye
There's good in goodbye
The End.
A/N: There ya have it. Like I said, that finale was total BS. So I shall continue writing fics and pretend that it never happened. Thanks for reading, and please review!