Hi all! Yeah, I know, "why isn't she updating GGSS?!" Chill out ppl, I'm having a bit of writer's block, plus remember that I am supremely ADHD.

This story is a collaboration of me, kazumigirl, and two other writers whom I'll refer to as UnderTheInfluence and Rusty Shacklefold, and a guest writer whom I'll call DragonFisher (I'm not sure what else to call her). Reviews are accepted greatly but this was written mostly for fun.

Summery: Seemingly normal teen girls live the world of IZ. Very funny and extremely random with maybe few inside jokes, allusions to other entertainment, and MAJOR BUSH BASHING! Rated for safety. The story gets a bit creepy later. Reviews welcomed.

Disclaimer: None of us own IZ or anything else except the new names.

I welcome you to our insanity….

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THE ZIM CHRONICLES

About three months ago, Lizz had been wandering about, waiting for her friends Katt and Erika when she meant Gir walking down the street. The little robot claimed Lizz as his "taco-wife" and they've been together ever since. That's how everyone knows each other already.

………………..

"Wow! I so glad we finally found this shop!" Erika exclaimed as she and Katt walked into the store. "I can't wait to try out that bottomless Oreo bag!"

They found the Oreos and about 3 other items they wanted and went to the checkout. Erika fished around in her pockets, but felt nothing bet lent, the combination the Kaiba's safe, (life savings), a dead ant, and a letter from Cassie who was far away in Cephiro battling Lantis. She looked helplessly at her friend.

"Oh, alright!" Katt ripped out her Penguin Empress credit card, "but you really need to quit leaving your wallet in Dora the Explorer land."

"Swiper's just so tricky," Erika replied. "I can never remember what to say to him when I don't want him to swipe my stuff."

The bored clerk took the card and punched in the numbers. A he did, Erika and Katt began to argue about whether pears were fruit or garbage, and the clerk looked at them. "Um, it says here that you're not a legal citizen."

"I am too," Katt hands flew to her hips, "I am most certainly legal!"

"Not according to your card. It says here that you legally abandoned your rights to this country when you left to rule Antarctica. You even left your signature as, 'So long, Bush! My penguins will devour your soul!'"

Erika stared at Katt. "Is there something you need to tell me, Catelyn?"

The clerk cleared his throat and said, "Well, due to this harsh immigration law Bush brought in, I'm afraid I'll have to sick Man-eating monkeys on you or ship you to Abu Dhabi. Unless you're married to someone in this country who is a citizen."

Erika shrugged. "Oh, well, in that case, she's married to me."

The clerk shook his head. "Bush also banned gay marriages."

"Drat!" Erika looked a t her friend forlornly and Katt whimpered, "What'll I do?"

The clerk picked up the phone and began to dial the white house, but Erika held down the talk button/bar and asked, "How long does she have to show proof of this marriage?"

"Until…" the clerk's face turned dark and his voice grew deep and raspy, "sunset…."

"C'mon, Catelyn," Erika toll off with Katt. "I have just the plan!"

Meanwhile, at Skool, Zim and Dib were calling each other names under their breath as the class participated in "Doomed Silence Time." Suddenly, the two girls rushed in and Katt screamed, "They're all so unproportioned!"

Erika scanned the room and snapped her fingers. She raced up to Zim. "There you are! Catelyn meet your new husband!"

Meanwhile, Lizz and Gir were eating Cheese Nips and drinking root beer while watching the Rocky Horror Picture Show.

"I love the little transvestites," Gir remarked. "I love them good."

Lizz suddenly shuttered. "My Katt senses are tingling."

Lizz took her litter robot husband by the hand and rushed out the door. Then she remembered that Gir wasn't in his doggy disguise and told him to run back and put it on. Once all that confusion was over, Lizz and Gir rushed up to Skool.

Lizz observed the room. Erika looked way too pleased with herself while Katt stood silently, blinking her eyes back and forth from Erika to Zim.

"Uh…" Lizz said, to Katt, "what's going on?" Erika leaned toward Lizz and explained the situation in a whisper. "Oh," Lizz said. she shrugged. "Okay."

Zim leaned back in his seat and folded his tiny arms. "What do you humans want now?"

Erika shoved Katt forward. "This is my friend, Catelyn. You remember, don't you?" Zim stared. "Anyways, we need you help with something-," Dib broke out in loud laughter.

"Him? Help? You must be crazy!!!" Dib exclaimed.

Erika became indignant. "For you information, I am crazy! What, did it suddenly become a crime?!" Dib silently stared. "Good, he shut up," Erika turned back to Zim. "Look, my friend isn't legal and might get be deported back to Antarctica-,"

"No on lives in-," Dib interrupted.

"SHUT UP!" Lizz, Erika and Katt said in unison.

"Ooooh," Gir said. He smiled brightly. "He got told."

"So, will you act like you're married to her so she can stay?"

Zim raised a brow, "Why should I help a filthy little human like you? What's in it for me?"

Erika practically pushed Katt into Zima's desk, signaling for her to answer.

"First of all," Katt explained. "I am NOT filthy! I am VERY clean! Second of all, here's what you get in return." Katt eyed Dib, who was still dumb-founded, before continuing. "I happen to be the Penguin Empress and I rule Antarctica. I can find a way to help you actually take over the world with my Penguin Army."

Zim began to actually become interested. "I'm listening."

Here's my offer," Katt said, her Libran diplomacy kicking in. "You help me stay in the states, I help you conquer Earth-,"

"Hurray for Earth!" Gir exclaimed. Katt smiled sweetly at the adorable robot, and then turned back to the little green alien. She held out her hand.

"Deal?"

"NOOO!" Dib screamed, coming between Katt and Zim. "You're actually going to help him conquer or world just so you can stay in the States?!"

They looked at him like he was stupid…which his is….

"Uh, yeah," Katt answered. Erika's grin dropped as she looked at Lizz, who looked at her. They were thinking the same thing.

"Yay! We're doomed!" Gir piped happily.

"Look," Dib attempted, "why not just fake a marriage with someone else." He eyed Zim loathfully. "Someone who's actually a citizen."

"You mean like you?" Lizz said sarcastically.

"Well, I…uh…"

"But you're not green!" Katt yelled in disgust.

"And you're gay," Erika added.

"I'm not gay!" Dib hollered.

"Gosh, quit denying it, already," Erika said in irritation. Lizz laughed. Katt sighed and turned to Zim.

"So, do we have an understanding," she said, holding out her hand again, "one alien to another?"

Zim seemed to ponder all this before shaking Katt's hand. "We have a deal." Then the bell rang for lunch.

"Let's go get some tacos," Gir suggested happily. He took both Lizz and Katt by the hand. He looked up at Katt. "Can I call you Mommy?"

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Okay, this thing is already written and doesn't exactly have set chapters, but I'm dividing that way. Meh.

Reviews Welcomed.