Foolish Beat of My Heart
By: Delylah
Title is from a song by Debbie Gibson. Spike, Buffy and Dru are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant enemy, Fox, WB, etc. etc. etc. I'm simply borrowing them.
This is another in a series of vignette's I've written while trying to get inside Spike's head for another story I'm writing. Spike is contemplating Buffy's death.
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I watched her falling; even before that I watched her run across the platform and leap into that hole in the darkness, the hole that swallowed her up and then spit her back out after having digested her life-blood and deemed it satisfactory.
I watched her falling into forever. It felt the same way I felt the last time she kissed me...as if the world had stopped and I held that moment in my fist like a single grain of sand to preserve it, keep it from shattering the world around me, but then it burned my hand until I let go and she stopped kissing, stopped falling.
I thought I loved her before she kissed me. I would have killed for her, almost killed Dru for her. I thought I loved Dru before her - thought Dru and I would spend an eternity together fighting, feeding, and fucking. I would have killed for Dru, and did kill, many, many times to put a smile on my black beauty's face. But our love was cold, fed only by the blood of others to warm our hearts. I was Dru's playtoy, a possession that she finally tired of after 100 or so years. I'm surprised now that I held her interest that long. Dru tends to get distracted rather easily.
I thought I loved her while Glory was beating the hell out of me - loved her and hated her at the same time. Thought I loved her when I asked her if she wanted to dance, thought I loved her every time my jeans tightened across my groin at the sight of her, every time I pasted a picture of her on the wall in my crypt or added a new scrap of her clothing to my collection.
Hell, I was stupid enough to think she was that damn robot when she came sashaying up to me that night after the Whelp and the Watcher left me half un-dead, all the while she was exclaiming about my "sexy wounds".
Then she kissed me. And it was as if my heart started beating again after all those years - as if blood began flowing, lungs began breathing, eyes began seeing. She was all of those things...light, breath, blood, life.
I would have killed for her before she kissed me that night. After, I would have died for her. My heart beat for her when she kissed me.
It stopped beating when she fell.
By: Delylah
Title is from a song by Debbie Gibson. Spike, Buffy and Dru are owned by Joss Whedon, Mutant enemy, Fox, WB, etc. etc. etc. I'm simply borrowing them.
This is another in a series of vignette's I've written while trying to get inside Spike's head for another story I'm writing. Spike is contemplating Buffy's death.
_____
I watched her falling; even before that I watched her run across the platform and leap into that hole in the darkness, the hole that swallowed her up and then spit her back out after having digested her life-blood and deemed it satisfactory.
I watched her falling into forever. It felt the same way I felt the last time she kissed me...as if the world had stopped and I held that moment in my fist like a single grain of sand to preserve it, keep it from shattering the world around me, but then it burned my hand until I let go and she stopped kissing, stopped falling.
I thought I loved her before she kissed me. I would have killed for her, almost killed Dru for her. I thought I loved Dru before her - thought Dru and I would spend an eternity together fighting, feeding, and fucking. I would have killed for Dru, and did kill, many, many times to put a smile on my black beauty's face. But our love was cold, fed only by the blood of others to warm our hearts. I was Dru's playtoy, a possession that she finally tired of after 100 or so years. I'm surprised now that I held her interest that long. Dru tends to get distracted rather easily.
I thought I loved her while Glory was beating the hell out of me - loved her and hated her at the same time. Thought I loved her when I asked her if she wanted to dance, thought I loved her every time my jeans tightened across my groin at the sight of her, every time I pasted a picture of her on the wall in my crypt or added a new scrap of her clothing to my collection.
Hell, I was stupid enough to think she was that damn robot when she came sashaying up to me that night after the Whelp and the Watcher left me half un-dead, all the while she was exclaiming about my "sexy wounds".
Then she kissed me. And it was as if my heart started beating again after all those years - as if blood began flowing, lungs began breathing, eyes began seeing. She was all of those things...light, breath, blood, life.
I would have killed for her before she kissed me that night. After, I would have died for her. My heart beat for her when she kissed me.
It stopped beating when she fell.