Yipes! Long author's note!

Bear with me, guys, I promise this is the only time it'll be long. But I'm super-super excited about this story; it's been in the works for months. Was originally going to be a one-shot . . . *laughs unhingedly.*

But anyway. This story exists for three reasons.

First off—

"ELIMINAAATE DRAGOOONNNNNNNNN!"

—Eh heh, sorry; just had to say that. But unbeknownst to Garmadon, the Mega Weapon actually did work that time! It just took a whole season to do it. By the beginning of "Rebooted," the Ultra Dragon was stark gone, never to be seen again except in "Shadow of Ronin," dubiously canonical. I'm ashamed to admit it, but I didn't even notice it was missing until ABCSonicKirbyWarriors pointed it out. So SKW, you're kinda the reason this story exists. How does the responsibility feel? :P

Second reason, Cole. What did they do to ya, buddy? I've grown used to his Season 4 personality change by now—heck, I actually kinda like it—but it's still not the same Cole we started out with. Not by a long shot. So there's gonna be a little dabbling in the where and why of it here, and a fairly heavy Cole-centric bent all throughout. That okay with you folks?

Third reason, everything else. Season 4 was the greatest thing since Spinjitzu, right up there with Season 1, but eventually I started noticing how insanely different the two seasons are. So there's gonna be some rambling inspired by that.

. . . I guess you might have guessed by now that it's not gonna be the most action-heavy story. There will be some rather dark/adult themes, too. But if I haven't scared off the entire audience by now, I hope you'll still give it a try!

Let's see, was I going to say anything else? Mm . . . Oh!

Technically this is written in LEGOs (but you can imagine 'em as humans if you'd rather)

The cover image is by Joshuad17 on DeviantArt (used with his permission!)

Credit for the title idea goes to my sister

And it starts out juuuuust before "Rebooted."

Annnnnnd lastly, the dedication. This story goes out to all you maniacs at Kelviniana. All but one or two of you will probably never read this, but whatcha don't know won't hurt you.

Disclaimer: I don't own Ninjago, LEGO, or anything else referenced here.

It's time to begin, isn't it?

"Hey! HEY! Not the hair!"

The Ultra Dragon, being an interdimensional being of near-limitless elemental power, had no respect for Kai's hair. Then again, nobody else did either, but interdimensional beings were definitely part of the focus group. Anyway, the head that had formerly been Flame was lovingly attempting to improve Kai's hairstyle (it seemed to be partial to the dragonlick), while the former Wisp was cheerfully swinging an irate Jay from its reins. The objective had been to move the dragon out of the front yard of Sensei Wu's academy before the school opened—because really, being able to use the front door was kind of important—but the elemental reptile seemed determined not to budge from its lounging spot.

"I do not understand," said Zane, giving Sensei Wu a questioning look. "The Ultra Dragon has never been this unruly; the last time we had this much trouble was just before the individual dragons left for their final transformation."

"He does seem a bit more . . . restless," murmured Sensei Wu. "Dragons are never restless for no reason."

"But he can't be undergoing another transformation, right? I thought he was all grown up!" said Cole.

"Could've fooled me!" called Jay grumpily, just before his grip on the reins slipped and he flew into Kai.

"This is the final adult form, I know that for certain," said Sensei Wu, tugging his beard in thought. "Although I must admit there is much I don't know about dragons. But I do have a theory . . . "

"Theory? I'll take theory!" Jay sat up, looking hopeful.

"Well . . . after all, this is the adult form . . . " said Sensei Wu slowly.

He was met with four silent stares, directed first at him, then one by one at the Ultra Dragon.

"No way." Jay scrambled to his feet and trotted over to sock the lightning dragon's head lightly on the snout. "You're out to get yourself a girl? Well why didn'cha say so? You're gonna need some advice!"

Wisp's head abruptly snorted and yanked back as if in panic, while the other three heads made various noises of dismay. Jay looked disgruntled as his friends burst out laughing, but Wisp nuzzled him apologetically until he relented and gave the dragon a rueful pat.

"Fiiiine, wise guy. You're on your own. But don't blame me if you freeze up in the middle of a pickup line!"

The Ultra Dragon left within less than two weeks, after a lot of petting and well-wishing. Sensei Wu had obtained a little bronze whistle that made no sound when you blew into it—at least not that the ninja could hear—but apparently the Ultra Dragon could sense the call of the whistle from pretty much anywhere. Nobody was too keen on breaking up any potential dragon honeymoons, but if they were ever in grave need, they knew they could call for their pet's help.

Truth be told they missed having the Ultra Dragon around. Besides which, the students at Sensei Wu's academy had been looking forward to having the world's most awesome class pet, so the lack of Ultra Dragon irked them. Brad in particular was ticked at having to ride the bus on field trips instead—a sentiment that the ninjas were beginning to share.

"Seriously," protested Kai, reaching across the aisle to separate Cole from the bus's microphone. "Why didn't you just tell them the Ultra Dragon's left?"

"Oh, no no." Cole waved a hand. "Then we'd have to tell them where it went."

"So?" piped up Jay.

Cole raised an eyebrow at him as the bus lurched out of the driveway and turned towards New Ninjago City.

"Well hey, you're the science teacher. Feel like explaining the whole 'circle of life' deal to these curious young minds?"

Jay spluttered.

"Thought not," said Cole smugly.

"Life is circular?" From the back row, Zane gave a curious tilt of his head. "I am not familiar with that expression. How does one quantify the shape of an abstract concept such as life?"

"It's not really a circle," said Kai patiently.

"Yeah, I've always thought it was kind of more of a pear shape," added Jay, illustrating with his hands.

"Pears? . . . " Zane, looking just a hint skeptical, caught Nya's eye in the bus's rearview mirror. It wouldn't be the first time his brothers had told him something outlandish to mess with him, but Nya usually gave him a straight answer. Turning her eyes back to the road, Kai's sister shook her head resignedly.

"Don't look at me. With you guys around, everything goes pear-shaped."

"Hey!"