'Why are these lights so damn bright? What happened last night?' I think, my head screaming at me to go back to sleep, as I reach for my phone on the nightstand.
"Ah, good. You're awake." My best friend Nate says as I sit up.
"What happened last night?" I ask him.
"You seriously don't remember?" He says incredulously.
"Why the hell would I be asking if I remembered, Nathaniel?" I say, my patience wearing thin.
"You called Blair…...and said some stuff I don't think you want me to repeat…." Nate says seriously, causing the memories to come rushing back.
"Dude, how many shots have I had?" I ask, drunk off my ass, with two strippers on each arm.
"More than enough, I think." Nate says seriously, trying to pull me out of the club and away from the bar and the girls.
"I miss Blair." I say as soon as the strippers are out of earshot.
"I know. But let's get you home and cleaned up. Worry about Blair tomorrow." Nate says as he guides me to the limo. But I break free and rush back into the bar, ordering their strongest drink.
"Chuck!" Nate says as I down my cup. I reach into my pocket and pull out my phone. Dialing the number that I know by heart, I press the phone to my ear as I stumble out of the club again. I hear the familiar ringing, and my is heart pounding "Blair-Blair-Blair".
"Hello?" I hear her sweet, melodic voice on the other end of the line. It's like hearing music, the most beautiful symphony, for the first time after a lifetime of hearing nothing with a beat. It's like tasting chocolate for the first time after a life on stale bread and water. In that moment, with her simple greeting, I realize how much I need her in my life, how empty I am without her.
"Blair…..it's Chuck. Please don't hang up. I need to tell you something." I say into the phone. After a long silence, she replies.
"Okay. You have two minutes." She says coldly. Even in her harsh, wintry tone, it's still music to my ears.
"30 seconds, Charles." She says, breaking me out of my trance.
"I miss you. Please come home. Nothing here is right without you with me. I need you, we all do. These past few weeks without you have shown me something: I cannot live without you. Nate can vouch for it. I've been getting drunk every night, trying to forget you. So just please, come-" I say, my voice breaking before I'm cut off by the dial tone that revealed the all-too-painful truth: Blair Waldorf, the girl I loved like no other and wanted to spend the rest of my life with, had hung up on me.
"Blair….." I sob, falling to my knees on the pavement.
"C'mon, let's get you home." Nate said, helping me up and into the limo.
"I called her?" I whisper quietly, staring down at my hands.
"Yeah. Buddy, do you love her?" Nate asks.
"Yeah. I love her. I love Blair Waldorf." I say.
"Then why couldn't you tell her? Why did you ditch her at the airport?" Nate asks, looking me square in the face.
"Because eventually, she would have realized that I don't deserve her. She would have realized I'm just a spoiled brat that wastes money on drinks and women." I say with a fiery passion that only the topic of Blair or Blair herself could elicit from me.
"You were changing for her. You were growing up. You were starting to deserve her." Nate says before walking out of the room.
'I should have just gone to bed. I never should have called her. I've ruined my chances with her for when she gets back. I should have listened to my head telling me to leave it alone. No, a few drinks and there I go, missing her again. I should have just gone to bed.' I think, before lying back onto my bed, waiting for a restful sleep that I knew would never come unless Blair Waldorf was by my side.