I don't own LOST, or the dancing cheeseburger, or Charlie, or the empty poker playing water bottle. This is just another spoof that comes from my mind, don't take this personally if you're one of those 'hey-look-at-me-and-my-obsessed-with-LOST-self' people. lol,I might add other chapters if I get enough good reviews.
When was I so jumpy? ...Yesterday. This island is starting to get to me... I thought I saw a dancing cheeseburger on the beach right next to where Jack was standing, talking to Kate. It turns out it was only Boone. I really regret tackling him now, 'cause this bruise is making my face all distorted. I swear that it was a dancing cheeseburger, taunting me! Man, I need my fix... But I have to make it last, 'cause who knows how long we'll be stuck on this island?!
Sayid is starting to creep me out... Then again, he always sorta did. He's always watchin' me like I was a crack addict with a disease or somethin'! I'm only a crack-addict, thank you very much. Hmm.. I'm starting to get a little fond of Claire. She seems nice, but it might be 'cause of the load she's carrying from the front. Mood swings haven't started coming yet, but I know they will! On another note: That dancing cheeseburger was back.. and I have another lovely bruise on the other side of my face. Boone needs to stop making those illusions, or I could end up misshapen for the rest of my days.
Jack's gone mental. I mean, me and the big guy were tellin' him about the water supply, then we start asking questions, then he gets all huffy! You'd think he was PMSing or something. Claire fell over, but she looks like she'll be fine. I finally caught the dancing cheeseburger and managed to bite it, but then all of a sudden, Boone punches me in the stomach! That's one fast cheeseburger if I can't catch it! You wait, I'll have eaten it by the time we get off this island. I've named the island too: Island of the Dancing Cheeseburgers. The rest of the survivors have started shooting me wierd glances.. But I think they're just jealous that the dancing cheeseburger doesn't taunt them.
I'm really bored, and Jack's gone mental... More so than the doctor was before. He's gone off his rocker, that's what! He needs to calm down.. should I give him some of my stash so he will? ..Nah! Let him deal with his own problems! He's gettin' this wierd far-off look sometimes. I caught him lookin' my way like that, and when we made eye-contact, he ran off screamin' his head off! ...I'm startin' to think he's a queer. He's got the hots for me, I know it. I don't swing like that, man. Kate is pretty good-lookin', if you ask me. I consulted the dancing cheeseburger on this while we were havin' a game of poker with an empty water bottle, but he just shrugged and stole my coconuts! That bassard!
Reviews, please? Oh, BTW, his thought process takes place every two days or so.