A/n: If any of my other reader's catch this one, I am working on other stories but my computer is STILL in the shop. There have been delays and I apologize. Please be patient with me. :)
Disclaimer: I do not claim, in any way, any rights to Angel. It is not my imaginative creation and I am making no attempts to procure money from it. This is merely for my own enjoyment and to practice my writing skills. No offense is meant.
Warnings: Possible slash reference, dependent on how the reader wishes to take it.
Angel's eyes snapped open as he jerked awake, feeling the bed covers rustle and tug around his cocooned body. He lay with his eyes open as he felt a body slip in beside him their back leaning against his side. He breathed in the familiar scent of one of his Children.
"Spike, what the hell are you doing in my bed," Angel growled as the scent of cigarettes wafted into his nose. The glow of a newly lit nicotine stick glowed from over the hunch of the bleach blond. The other vampire gave a groan and rolled over so he lay side by side with Angel.
"I've been having nightmares," Spike said nonchalantly. He took another drag from the cigarette, releasing the smoke through his nostrils. Angel focused on the ceiling trying to pretend the crazy vampire wasn't in his bed, casually smoking a cigarette.
"Bloody things the same every time. Dru's bored and me, being the sympathetic heart I am, I'm running around like my head's been cut off to appease her." Spike waved away a puff of smoke and said, "There's only me and her."
Angel sits up and looks at Spike. Come on! We've been over this a hundred times. You have a soul now you should – "
"Understand," Spike interrupts. "I do. This isn't a bout you and your guilt complex, Peaches," he says not even looking up at the brunette.
"Oh."
"Yeah, oh," Spike rolls his eyes. "So Dru's upset and wanting to play. I'm just trying to make her happy so I'm coming and going with playthings to keep her occupied. Dolls, you know."
Spike's face is turned toward him. Angel narrows his glance and injects, "Children."
"You don't need to make me say it," Spike sneers, turning back to his cigarette. "Bloody poof."
Spike's glance is distracted, looking around the dark walls of Angel's Wolfram & Hart bedroom. The nicotine stick makes a slow glowing path as he rolls it around in his mouth. Great, Angel thinks, now he's staring at his lips.
"So yeah, I brought her children, I'm going to hell whatever. That is hardly new." Spike takes another drag. His face resets and he is back to the seriousness of the conversation. "I remember seeing them die, you know. They'd just go limp in her arms as she cuddled their bloodless bodies."
Spike pantomimes it, nearly setting aflame the covers over his chest with the light. Angel thinks he sees the glimmer of wetness to Spike's eyes, especially after Spike gives a sniffle and wipes at his cheek.
"Sad thing is that I can't remember exactly how many there are. But I keep seeing every one of their faces. Damning ain't it?"
"Are you upset about this Spike?"
"Don't get started with the do-gooder touchy-feely poof crap, not with me mate." Spike glares at Angel as he speaks.
The words, combined with the arrogant behavior of the vampire, the way he just slid into the bed and assumed there'd be freedom to speak his fears is beginning to infuriate Angel. He growled and bared his teeth, looking away in an attempt not to kick Spike roughly off the bed.
"Why are you telling me this?"
Spike shrugs beside him, throwing the cigarette holding arm over his face and covering his eyes from the Sire. Angel sat staring at the walls, thinking up a list of ways to torture Spike without killing the bastard.
Silence swells in the room until angel feels the side of the cigarette against his arm. A hiss escaped his teeth as he jerked his arm away.
"Bloody hell," Spike exclaimed pulling the cigarette away. He wet his fingers and put out the stick before tossing it to the floor.
Angel glared in the direction of the discarded light before turning his narrowed gaze toward the blonde. Spike is tugging at his elbow murmuring curses as he tries to get a look on the burn.
"Oh let me see it you poof. You're a big bad vampire, I'm sure a little burn wasn't that bad."
"Let go of my arm Spike."
The blonde gave up with a sigh, lifting his arms in a form of surrender.
"Touchy," Spike tsked.
He looks angel in the eye and the elder vampire gets a look at the red-rimmed irises and the tear stains on his cheeks.
Angel could smile.
"So it is make you upset."
"Shut up mate or I'm gonna stake you through that big, poofy heart of yours."
Angel shook his head and leaned toward the blonde vampire. He reached out a hand and caught a firm grasp on the back of Spike hair, using just enough strength to keep the man's face directed towards his own.
"Angel," Spike growled. The brunette pulled Spike toward him by the scruff of his neck so he could take a closer look at the tear tracks. He dragged a thumb over them making Spike flinch. Angel turned his nail to make a gentle line down the cheek, running closer to the nicotine stained lips. He forgot for a second who he was dealing with and ended up with a thumb of Spike's teeth.
Angel hissed and pulled his thumb away, looking down at the devilish smile on the Childe's lips.
"Sorry mate thought it was a tator tot."
Angel growled and pinned the blonde to the bed. He opened his jaw, his face that of his vampire self, and made to roar in Spike's face. He'd revered back to an instinctive reaction but stop himself when he noticed spike's face.
Little William was still crying.
"What…" HE bit his tongue as he caught himself in the middle of a stutter. He looked everywhere on Spike's face trying to regain his tongue.
Spike caught the look and fell into a fit of laughter. Angel had a look of horror as he watched. It wasn't just laughter, it was hysterical and full of more tears then even William had cried.
"You know sometimes, and this sounds nuts, I feel like I was one of those babies. Just something Dru needed. I don't mean to bring it up mind you, but when you left all she had was me. She needed me, but only just as much as she needed a child. I was a plaything." AS he spoke Angel released both of Spike's wrists, sitting back on his haunches as he watched another one of his "masterpieces" showing the true colors he'd caused.
"I was never you, never could be. For a bloody pounce you sure left huge shoes to fill," Spike mumbled from beneath his forearms. "Now, to add to it all even my guilt is trying to be just like "daddy." Every time I try to sleep I see some goddman victims face. Then I come into this job, day in day out and your friends could care less. We argue. Its like the universe is carrying on the damn tradition of playing with William."
Angel sat silently atop Spike, watching as the blonde's shoulders shook in tears born of frustration. Something coiled in Angel's gut and he remembered that for several days the pale as a sheet blonde had been looking like he'd gotten punched in the eyes.
"Bet you thought I'd been rightfully given the old one-two. All of you," Spike murmured, vocalizing Angel's thoughts.
With a groan of the springs the brunette rolled off of Spike. He lay beside him so once again their sides were touching. The bed was slowly stopping its shake as Spike reeled his breakdown back in.
"Will."
Spike flinched at the sound of the name. Angel repeated the syllable until finally eyes appeared beneath the forearm.
"Take off the damn jacket and come over here."
To both of their surprise he did just that, laying back down beside him. Angel grabbed the covers and dragged them up over their bodies, then unceremoniously grabbed Spike's shoulder and rolled him atop his chest. The blonde gave a groan of complaint but remained sprawled over Angel's chest. With his free hand Angel tuck the blankets in around them.
"Go to sleep."
"Were you not listening during my break down, Peaches," Spike asked into his chest.
"Shut up. Try to sleep but wake me if you have a nightmare." Angel gave the younger vamp a look and added, "But for no other reason."
Then he kissed Spike's forehead and closed his eyes.
"Alright, mum," Spike murmured. Angel groaned and turned his head away as he murmured curses. Spike gave a snort, but snuggled closer to the brunette, grin hanging from his lips.
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