The Monster Within, a twilight fanfic

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A/N: The date of this story is correct for my alternate history, as described in my profile. Barbie

Fall 2009

Nessie four A/E twelve, claiming thirteen, eighth grade

Lydia

I dreaded the walk home from school now. Every day he was there, sitting in the empty lot…waiting for me to pass. I clutched my books tighter as I approached, hoping he wouldn't be there…but of course he was.

There was nothing particularly threatening about the appearance of the man himself. He was about the age of my uncle, maybe fifty or so. He wore jeans and a cap and a flannel shirt.

It was his eyes that scared me; the way they fixed on me as soon as I came into view, the way they followed me as I walked past and bored into my back until I was out of sight. I tried not to look at him, but still I could feel when his eyes were on me.

I had tried telling Mom about him; she just laughed and said not every stranger was out to hurt me; probably he was a friendly old man like my uncle. Funny, when she was the one who used to warn me about strangers when I was little…

He was there. I could see him out of the corner of my eye, though I refused to turn, refused to hasten my steps…what animal was it, that would only attack if you ran?

I didn't run, not until I was sure he couldn't see me. Then I let myself go, arriving home breathless and panting. I fumbled with the key for a moment before the lock clicked open. "Hi, Mom! I'm home!" I shouted loudly, just in case he had followed. Then I darted inside, slamming the door shut and locking it. The click of the lock was loud in the empty house.

I collapsed into the chair at the kitchen table, burying my face in my hands and shaking with silent, terrified sobs.

I could call the police, I supposed, but what could they do when the man had never actually done anything to me? If my own mother didn't believe me, why should they?

I hated the silence of an empty house. Little noises, that I didn't even hear when Mom was home, sounded like someone walking in the rooms overhead. I nearly screamed with terror, and decided then that this was the last afternoon I would spend alone.

Mom's rule was no friends over when she wasn't home, but she didn't understand…didn't believe me…

oOo

"Nessie," I whispered as I slid into my seat at school the next morning, "can you come home with me this afternoon?" I asked it in a rush, half afraid I'd change my mind, and she looked at me curiously.

"I'll call at lunch and ask," she promised.

Nessie Cullen was rich; we all knew that. The cell phone she pulled out at lunchtime was one of the newest models…I wasn't sure it was even in the stores yet. Somehow, though, she didn't seem to know she was rich; maybe she just accepted it as a matter of course. She never acted stuck up or anything; she spent money as easily on her friends as on herself.

I missed most of her phone call; she was talking softly, and I was thinking about…other things. But when I heard her close the phone, I looked up anxiously. "Well?"

"I can come," she told me. "Edward will pick me up from your house at four thirty."

Four thirty. That left me half an hour alone…but I couldn't chance having Mom find out I'd had a friend over.

After school, I tried not to let my nervousness show as we started walking to my house. Nessie was talking about the story we were supposed to write for English; she was going to do one about werewolves or something. I wouldn't have taken Nessie for the kind of girl who was interested in monster stories…

But I had enough to worry about with the human monster waiting for me in that vacant lot.

I kept my eyes fixed steadily ahead, but Nessie turned to look…as I had done the first day he was there. He had merely winked at me, but now to my horror he started coming towards us.

I realized then what a fool I had been. Why had I invited Nessie to walk home with me? Nessie Cullen, the prettiest girl in the whole school?

"Hi, girls." It was the first time I had heard him speak; his voice was surprisingly pleasant, with a touch of a Texas accent. I heard an edge of danger in it, but I was sure Nessie wouldn't. "Run, Nessie!" I hissed.

But Nessie smiled sweetly and took a step toward the man. "Hello."

oOo

Nessie

Lydia was cowering in fear at my side as the man came toward us. His eyes gave him away, looking at us in all the wrong places. I gave him an innocent smile, but let my teeth show a little more than necessary. "Hello."

"You two like ice cream?"

"Not really," I said honestly.

"What do you like, then? Two pretty girls deserve a treat."

"We don't take gifts from strangers," I said, showing my teeth in a smile again.

He came closer and grabbed our wrists; Lydia let out a small scream. I jerked my hand free; he grabbed for it again, but I was quicker. "Let her go!" I snarled, all pretense of friendliness gone from my face now as my lip curled back from my teeth.

"Make me, beautiful," he taunted.

"All right." I struck his wrist with the side of my hand, smiling in satisfaction as the bone gave way. He stared at me in shock, cradling his wrist in his other hand. "You broke my wrist, you little —"

I heard a snarl behind me. "I'll break more than your wrist if you touch either of those girls again."

Daddy!

I wasn't surprised that he had been following us; he was so overprotective. But this was just a human; I wasn't in any danger; I could have handled it!

The man took a step backward. "I-I didn't mean them any harm!"

Daddy stepped forward, closing the distance between them, half crouched and menacing. "No?" he asked, his voice whisper-soft and dangerous.

Lydia seemed nearly as scared of him as she had been of the man; she clutched my hand tightly. "It's all right," I murmured to her. "That's my brother, Edward."

I looked so much like Daddy that we always had to claim to be related somehow; when I was little I was his niece.

The man was visibly scared now, his face white and covered with sweat. Suddenly he lost his nerve and bolted.

Daddy followed almost lazily, even falling a little behind the man. He would wait until he was out of Lydia's sight to catch him, I supposed.

Momma was getting out of the car; she came toward us and put a hand on Lydia's shoulder. "Are you all right, honey?"

Lydia burst into tears, and Momma pulled her into her arms. "Shh," she murmured. "It's all right."

"I — was so scared!" Lydia gasped.

"I know. But you're safe now."

Lydia sniffed and pulled back, wiping her sleeve across her face. "Are you Nessie's sister?"

"Her adopted sister, yes; I'm Bella." She squeezed Lydia one more time and then rested a hand on her shoulder. "Come on. Let's get you home."

I trailed behind them and slid into the back seat of Daddy's car. Lydia sat in front, quiet except for occasional sniffs. When Momma parked across the street from her house, she looked up anxiously. "Will you come in?"

"Of course, honey."

Lydia unlocked the door, and we followed her inside. Momma found some cookies and poured Lydia a glass of milk, then offered to help with her homework.

I pulled out my notebook and started working on my werewolf story. It was supposed to be funny, with the boy trying to convince the girl he was a werewolf, and could do all kinds of special things, but she didn't believe any of it.

I wasn't sure yet if it was going to end there, or if he would rescue her from something and then she'd believe him.

Daddy came in without knocking, and Lydia let out a startled scream before she realized who it was. Even then, she watched him with wide eyes.

He lifted me out of my seat, sliding under me and settling me in his lap. I tried to hold myself stiff, but it was so hard to stay mad at Daddy with his arms around me… I sighed a little and let myself lean against him.

Momma was looking at him with a question in her eyes, and he shook his head slightly. "I knocked him out and called the police," he said, low enough that only Momma and I could hear.

Momma relaxed slightly, but I frowned. I had been sure Daddy was going to take care of him…

"He was a convicted sex offender who'd escaped from prison," Daddy added; "he won't be getting out again." He looked down at my notebook then, as if noticing it for the first time…probably he'd seen the whole story in my mind already. "Werewolves, Nessie?"

I twisted around and stuck out my tongue at him. "I like werewolves!"

He chuckled dryly. "I know you do."

I frowned. Do you think Jack should rescue Rena so she'll believe him?

"Yes," Daddy murmured in my ear, "but not from vampires."

I made a face. Don't be silly, Daddy! Vampires are good.

"Not all of them."

I shrugged. I knew, of course, that some vampires were monsters who drank human blood, but the ones I knew weren't like that. And humans weren't all good, either… It wasn't what you were that made you a monster, but who you were.

"True," Daddy whispered, but I thought it sounded as if he was trying to convince himself.

"Lydia's writing about a robbery at a grocery store," Momma told him, mostly for Lydia's sake.

Lydia glanced up at Daddy, then looked away quickly. "Bella's helping me."

She kept glancing at the clock, and finally she sighed. "It's four thirty," she whispered. "You'd better go; I'm not supposed to have friends in, and if Mom comes home early…" Her eyes darted to the corners of the room, as if expecting to find men lurking there.

"We can stay in sight of the house until your mother gets home," Daddy offered, standing up and setting me on my feet.

I quickly gathered my books, and heard the relief in Lydia's voice as she answered. "Oh, would you?"

"Yes. That man will never bother you again, Lydia, but if you want a ride home tomorrow just wait after school with Nessie."

Lydia nodded, and Momma gave her one last hug before we left the house.

I frowned as I slid into the backseat, my former irritation returning as I thought about what had happened. He was only human, Daddy; I didn't need to be rescued!

To my surprise he got in the back with me. He tried to put an arm around me, but I slid to the other side, knowing I couldn't hold on to my anger in his embrace.

"I know," he said quietly. "You were going to kill him, Nessie."

I heard Momma gasp softly; she hadn't realized that.

"He deserved to die!" I snarled. I don't have to read his thoughts to know what he wanted to do with us!

"I know," Daddy said again, a hollowness in his voice that I didn't understand. "I wasn't trying to save you from him, or even save him from you. I saved you from yourself, Nessie. From being a monster."

I scowled. Killing monsters doesn't turn you into a monster!

"Yes," he whispered hollowly. "It does." His eyes were haunted now, staring into the distance, and Momma reached back and took his hand. "Tell her," she whispered.

Daddy sighed. "I wasn't always happy with animal blood, Nessie."

"You drank — human blood?" I squeaked. I knew some of my family "slipped" once in a while, but I sensed that wasn't what he was talking about.

"Only 'monsters,' Nessie," he said, his voice hard. "Rapists, murderers, wife-beaters…I heard their thoughts…I knew every one of them deserved to die." He dropped his face into his hand, and I crawled into his lap and put my arms around him. "No matter how much they deserved it, Nessie, every time I took a human life…it was I who became the monster. Red-eyed. Vicious. A killer."

"You aren't a monster, Daddy!"

Daddy laughed bitterly. "I wish I could believe it." He wrapped his arms around me, holding me tight. "But I do know this — I will not allow you to become a monster, Renesmée Charlisle Cullen!"

"I wouldn't have drunk his blood," I whispered.

"In front of Lydia, I should hope not," Daddy murmured. "But those men I killed would be on my head just as much if I hadn't drunk their blood. Don't take a life unless you have to, Nessie; don't feed the monster."

He must have heard Lydia's mother's thoughts; suddenly I was sitting on the seat, Daddy was in the driver's seat, and we were driving smoothly away.

I wouldn't forget what he had said, wouldn't forget that all human life was sacred… But even with all he had told me, I would never think of my daddy as a monster. Not now, not ever.

"Thanks, Nessie," he murmured. And we drove on toward home.

The End

A/N: Of course, Lydia was wrong about not calling the police! And by the way, I didn't make a mistake on Nessie's middle name; if you look on my profile you'll see that I intentionally changed it. Barbie

I proofread all my stories at least once before posting, but if you see any mistakes I might have missed, please let me know!

Please note that I have internet access only once a week, and may not have time to respond to all reviews/messages. If you have questions regarding my Twilight alternate history, check my profile first to see if they're answered there. Thanks for your understanding! Barbie