So this is my story of how things could go (how I would like them to go) after the episode Brave New World. Everything that has happen in holby up to and including that episode is the same in the universe of the fic. Hope you enjoy and please leave your comments, always looking to improve my writing. Thank you and Enjoy.
Things were strangely quiet on AAU. The red phone hadn't rung in at least half a day, all patients seem to have only straight forward injuries, nothing for the doctors to argue about. Even though nearly everything was done that could be done, in that patients waiting for surgery were ready and prepped. Those recovering were being kept an eye on by the nurses. Everything was in hand. Though that didn't stop Bernie Wolfe peering over shoulders, re-checking notes, and talking to tired patients. Why was she doing all this when she had a paper work sitting in her office waiting to be done? Because Serena Campbell was currently sitting in there doing her own paperwork. And even though they had seemingly cleared the air the week before, things felt weird for Bernie. Serena was still acting weird. She couldn't understand, they had decided to the kiss behind them, hadn't they? Then why was it so clearly still in front of Serena. Bernie was pulled out of her thoughts by Raf tapping her on the shoulder.
'Bernie, it's quiet round here. Why don't you go and relax for a little while? The red phone could ring at any minute.'
Bernie nodded and slowly headed to the shared office. She could see Serena staring at her computer screen intently while mindlessly fiddling with a pen in between her fingers. It was simple images like that that made Bernie's heart swell a little. She slowly entered the office, not wanting to disturb Serena from her work. It almost worked but the click of the door closing prompted Serena to move her head and drop her pen. She gave a tight smile as the blonde headed to her own desk.
'Everything okay out there?' She asked, she got no response 'Bernie?'
'Oh, what? Yes, yes, everything is okay thanks. Quiet.'
'Enjoy it while it last, everything could change in a second.'
'Quite,' Bernie started to relax into her chair, when Morven knock on the door then entered.
'Ms Wolfe you're needed. The ED have sent up a young woman with serve gunshot wounds.'
Bernie jumped out of her sit and followed Morven. As they quickly headed towards the trauma bay, the young doctor briefed Bernie has best she could.
'Cate Barns, she was shot mid-range at a Gay Pride celebration,'
Bernie nodded and headed into the bay. The woman in question was a mess, blood was everywhere, and mixed with what seemed to be glitter. After having a quick look over ED's notes, Bernie quickly pull on a pair of latex gloves and took a closer look. Gunshot wounds scattered all across the girl's abdomen, all at different levels within the body. She was going to need help to get all the surface ones out if she was going to get to the deeper ones in time.
'Morven, can you get Ms Campbell please' she said
Bernie grabbed a pair of surgical tweezers and went to get to work. She pressed down on the stomach slightly, then out came a scream in pain. Bernie looked up in surprise, this girl was awake! She had known soldiers passed out from the pain with lesser injuries.
'Sorry, this is going to hurt'
'You're telling me,' came the voice of Cate 'I normally at least have drinks with a girl before I let put me in this kind of pain.'
'Again, sorry'
'At least let me know your name'
'Ms Wolfe,'
'Nice' the girl turned her head to look at Bernie, her face was covered glitter and face paint, Bernie furrowed her brow, 'What never seen a gay so technicolour?' Bernie went to stumble an apology, when Cate laughed, 'Don't worry, only joking. Hmm, are all the Doctors here as gorgeous as you?'
Before Bernie can say or do anything Serena comes rushing in.
'I take that as a yes' said the girl.
'Right what do we have here?' Said Serena
Bernie straighten up, 'this is Cate Barns, she has multiple shotgun wounds, mostly surface but several appear to be lodged in deeper. I need help getting the surface ones out, the faster we get her into surgery the better'
Serena nodded, kited herself out and started on her side, Bernie doing the same. They worked in silence bar the occasional strangled screams from Cate. After 20 minutes they had appeared to have removed the surface shrapnel and she was snitched up. Bernie stepped out of the unit.
'Morven, could to get a theatre slot and I'd like you to scrub in' Morven nodded mutely.
Back in the unit Serena was dressing the final few empty holes. Not looking at Bernie. The blonde doctor turned to Cate, who had gone a bit dazed,
'Ms Barns, we need to take you into surgery to remove the more embedded pieces. Do you consent?'
Cate shook her head.
'It will be under general antithetic, you won't feel a thing. Do you consent?'
Cate shook her head again.
'Why?'
'Time, need time'
'Cate, I'm sorry I really am, but we do not have time. One wrong move and a piece of shrapnel could go in the wrong place and you'll be paralysed. Do you understand?'
Cate nodded.
'Will you consent?'
Teary eyed, she nodded.
'Good, I am sorry if you feel rushed. But this is the best way to make sure you survive this.'
Cate nodded again but refused to look in Bernie's direction. Bernie sighed and left the trauma unit. Serena was pulling off her plastic apron and gloves when she said, 'Ms Wolfe is the best trauma surgeon in this hospital, and quite possibly the whole of the U.K. So, whatever you need time for you'll have plenty of it. After the op.'
'I better or I'm haunting your arses' Serena chuckled slightly, Morven came in
'I'm here to prep for the surgery'
Serena nodded, and left the unit. She found Bernie at the Nurse's station looking at a file on the computer. She didn't say anything, just sat down next to her.
'Don't,' said Bernie.
'I said nothing,'
'She needs the surgery and fast.'
'I know, but you could have been a little more… sympathetic'
Bernie pursed her lips. 'Maybe,'
'This is Holby, not Iraq.'
'What do you mean by that?'
'She is a young girl, scared, not sure she is going to see the end of the day who has been shot. Not a Soldier, who wakes up every day thinking that today could be the day.'
'I know,' she sighs, 'I'll go and speak to her'
'Good'
Bernie headed to the unit, bumping into Morven on the way out, who was looking slightly more distressed than usual. Serena went to get up and see if she was okay, But Morven disappeared off the ward. Serena stayed at the Nurses' station for another 10 minutes pretending to check on patient notes, all the while having one eye on the door to the trauma unit. Just as she was about to give up on the pretence and go and see if things were going okay. Bernie came rushing out pushing Cate in the bed who was screaming out in pain.
'Help here!' Bernie shouted. Several nurses and porters came to her aid, Serena quickly behind.
'What's happen?'
'She sat up, I told her to stay still. It seems that has moved one of the pieces. She needs to get into theatre now.'
'Okay' Serena turned to one of the nurses at the station, 'Call Theatre one, tell them she is on the way.' Turning back to Bernie 'Do you want me to scrub in?'
'No, I can handle things. And Morven is there for an extra pair of hands.'
With that they disappeared in theatre. Serena stood dejectedly outside. After a moment she straighten up and went back to her office.
It had been two hours since they went into theatre, it had been one and a half hours since Serena had done any work. She couldn't get her head around the way Bernie had spoken her, her refusing her help in theatre. What had she said last week in her "We should just be friends speech", Serena wrinkled up her nose at the memory of it, "we do make a great team though… here's to keeping it confided to theatre,". It seemed there wasn't even that these days. Just the occasional office conversation. Stilted. Unsure. It drove Serena mad, she had never been so stuck for words as she was around Bernie Wolfe, even something as natural as flirting to Serena became hard. She couldn't flirt with Bernie, and she didn't particularly want to flirt with anyone else, even the barista to get extra whipped cream. Serena face palmed her desk, though instead of solving all her problems she only succeeds in giving herself a slight headache. Which was slightly aggravated by shouting coming from the Nurses' station. She got up and went to find out what the problem was.
At the station there was a young woman wearing jeans and crop top covered in glitter and sprays of blood. She was currently shouting at a rather uncomfortable looking Raf.
'… Why won't anybody tell me where she is! I bet if I were her boyfriend you'd tell me!'
Serena gave a slight cough. The young woman stopped and looked at her.
'What?'
'Could you please refrain from talking to my staff like that please, we have a zero tolerance policy on that kind of behaviour,' she turns to Raf 'Mr Di Luca could you please go and check on Bed 7's stitches, I've been watching him fidget for the last 10 minutes, they have probably come lose by now.'
Raf nodded, thankful for the escape route, and promptly disappeared over to Bed 7. Serena then turned to the woman. 'Right, so what seems to the problem?'
'No one will tell me anything,' the woman had tears in her eyes now, Serena soften towards her.
'About?'
'My girlfriend. She was brought here. Shot. Her name is Cate Barns'
'Okay, What's your name?'
'Robyn Cheshire'
'Well, Robyn, why don't you follow me to my office, and we will have a chat.'
Inside the office Serena signified Robyn to take a seat. She did reluctantly, now in the confides of the offices, she seemed to lose some of here nerve, she started pulling on her top, rubbing her hands on her dirty jeans. Serena gave her a moment to relax a bit before talking.
'So, hello. My name is Serena Campbell, Co-Managing consultant here on AAU. I am guessing Mr Di Luca explained to you that because you are not a relative or spouse we cannot…'
'But...'
Serena held up her hand to stop her, 'It is the rule, there to make sure information getting into the wrong hands. However, I will look on our system to see if the ED managed to get an emergency contact down before she came up here, and if that is you I will be able to disclose some information to you without the patient's consent, do you understand?'
Robyn nodded and waited while Serena fiddled with her computer. After a couple of minutes, a smile appeared on her face. 'Looks like you are in luck Ms Cheshire. Cate did put you down.'
Robyn breathed a sigh of relief.
'So? What can you tell me?'
Serena moved her chair to be more in front of the her. 'As you are probably aware Ms. Barns came in with multiple gunshot wounds, and while we were successful in removing the surface shrapnel, there were multiple pieces lodged further in. She is currently in surgery getting them removed.'
Robyn had tears streaming down her face.
'Try not to worry too much, which I know is easier said than done, but she is in with the best trauma surgeon in the country. She has her best chance. And from my short interactions with her, it seems like she's got some fight in her,'
'You spoke to her? How was she?'
'In a lot of pain, but bearing up,' Serena taking a proper look at the girl she noticed that she wasn't just slightly covered in blood and glitter, her clothes were almost completely covered. Serena sighed and went into her bottom draw pulling out a spare pair of scrubs. 'Ms Cheshire,'
Robyn looked up and noticed the scrubs, she furrowed her brow.
'Go get changed into these, I doubt you will want Cate to see you with, what I can only assume, is her blood'
Robyn looked down at herself, eyes widen, and quickly took the scrubs.
'You can get changed in the toilets just around the corner. And…' she said as she fished an empty carrier bag out of her bag, 'here is a bag to put your clothes in,'
Robyn took the bag, stood up and went for the door, then turned.
'Thank you, you are the first person to talk to me like a human being since it happen. All the Police wanted to know was the whos, whats and where. They were so caught up it that, they seemed to ignore my protests that I needed to be with Cate, and by the time they listen she was gone. Took an age to find where… Sorry, you didn't need that. Just, thank you, most sincerely'
Then she went.
Ten minutes later there was a knock at the door, Serena looked up to see Robyn standing here, looking a little better in the scrubs. Serena signalled for her to come in.
'Sorry, I didn't know where to go.'
'Ah, sit down, and when I've finished this patient file I will show you to the family room.'
Robyn sat and looked into the distance, clearly trying to control her emotions. Serena wanted to say something, but felt in wouldn't be right. A couple of moments before she finished the file, Bernie came rushing in the office, didn't notice Robyn until she was almost at her desk. When noticed she quickly turned, frown and went to speak, but Serena beat her to it.
'Ms Wolfe, this is Robyn Cheshire, she is Miss Barns's girlfriend. She came in looking for her'
'Okay, but why she…'
'She is in scrubs because I gave them to her. She was covered in blood, and I figured that wouldn't be the first thing that Miss Barns would what to see upon waking up from surgery.'
'Ahh I see,'
Serena turned to Robyn who seemed to still be in trace.
'Robyn? Robyn?' Serena waved her hand in front of the woman, who quickly shook her head and looked around the room, eyes resting on Bernie and then on Serena, 'Robyn, this is Ms Berenice Wolfe, she operated on Cate,'
Robyn's eyes widen and quickly jumped up towards Bernie.
'How is she?'
Bernie gave a soft smile, 'She is fine, barring any further complications, she will make a full recovery.'
Robyn actually squealed, and hugged Bernie. Bernie was shook for a second then awkwardly patted Robyn on the back.
'Thank you, thank you, thank you! Can I see her?'
'She is still under antithetic, but will come out of it soon, so yes, she is in Bed 5'
Serena stood up, 'I'll show you,'
Robyn jumped slightly and left the office, Serena following quickly behind, but not leaving without giving Bernie a small squeeze on her arm as congratulations. When the door was closed again, and Bernie was on her own, she touched where Serena's hand just was and sighed quietly.
Over at Bed 5, Robyn stood looking at the Cate. The only sign that Cate was still alive was the subtle rise and fall of her chest. A sop came from Robyn as she quickly jumped to Cate's bedside, pulling a chair as close to the bed as possible. She grabbed at her hand, brought it to her lips and kissed it.
Serena was stood watching the scene before her, tears threaten to fall. She couldn't work out why. She had seen emotional reunions by bedsides before. She would normally just let a small smiled escape her lips and get on with her day. She needed to get off the ward. Needed some air. She quickly turned and fled the ward.
Bernie saw Serena heading for the doors of the ward. Got up and went to speak to her, but didn't get out of the office in time to intercept. She was confused, what had upset Serena so much that she needed to get out. She went to go and find her, but was stopped by Raf calling her about a patient in Bed 7. Her shoulders sagged and, she reluctantly went to Raf.
Serena found herself up on the roof looking over Holby. She couldn't believe looking over the city that so much disaster could happen in one place. Holby must be one of the worst places in the country to live. Serena breathed in deep and turned to go back downstairs, but another wave of tears broke over her. She really couldn't work out why she was crying. The moment was broken by the fire escape opening, Serena quickly turned trying to wipe the tears away.
'Serena! There you are.' It was Bernie. Of course. Who else.
'Ah, you've found me' She tried to keep her voice as calm as possible. She felt Bernie come and stand next to her. Their hands were almost touching on the metal railing.
'Serena, what's wrong? Please tell me.'
'Noth…' Serena closed her eyes, steadied her breathing, then opened her eyes again, 'Honestly? I have no idea. I saw Robyn's outpouring of emotions at Cate's bedside and something snapped. I needed air, space'
'Okay, do you want me to leave?'
'No, stay,'
They were both looking out over the city now, quietly, carefully Serena moved her hand closer to Bernie's, they were resting side by side now.
'Bernie..?'
'Yes?' Then Bernie's pager went off. 'Looks like Cate is awake. I'd better go and see how she is. You going to stay up here?'
'No, I'll come down now.'
On the ward they were greeted with the sight of Robyn with a massive smile on her face, and Cate with a tired smile. Bernie went up with Serena closely behind. Neither of them were noticed straight away. Bernie looked at Cate's chart before coughing slightly getting the girls' attention.
'Glad to see you awake Miss Burns, now I need to give you a quick look over you, make sure everything is as it should be, so if you could…' turning to Robyn 'give us some space, I'll be done in about 10 minutes'
Robyn looked like she was going to protest, but Serena stepped in before she could.
'Ms Cheshire, why don't you come with me and a coffee or something. There is a machine down the hall,'
Robyn pursed her lips, went to protest again, this time Cate jumped in.
'Go, I'm not going anywhere.'
'Hmm, okay,' Robyn stood up, 'But I am not going to go without a kiss' she bent down and placed a gently kiss on Cate's lips. On standing up, she noted two different actions from the two surgeons. The blonde was looking anywhere but the bed, whereas the brunette was starring directly at the blonde. Ahh, now that was telling.
Robyn followed Serena, and while they were waiting for the machine to cooperate, Robyn gave Serena a knowing look. Serena frown in confusion.
'Yes?'
'Now, this is completely none of my business, and I should keep out. But I think I've been where you are now.'
'What are you ta…'
'How long have you been in love with her?'
'What!'
'It is plain to anyone with eyes, the way you look at her. It is how I used to look at Cate, before we got together'
'Well… I, hmm. Oh damn it. Longer than I care to admit to, longer than she'd believe,'
'Does she feel the same?'
'I have no idea,'
'Yes, you do.'
'I shouldn't be talking to you about this,'
'But you are, so..?'
'She kissed me, and then I kissed her back,'
'Brilliant! So, why the longing looks?'
'Last week, I was my normal digging myself a grave embarrassing, and she took that to mean I regretted what happened. Even when I invited her of a drink, she said, it would be wise if we put the whole thing behind us.'
'Ouch. Well, only one thing for it'
'What?'
'Kiss her again. She won't be able to put that behind her.'
With that last remark, the machine gurgled into life.
Back on the ward, Bernie watched as Serena disappeared off the ward with Robyn. A sharp cough came from the bed. Bernie shook herself out of her daze and pulled on a pair of latex gloves, and went to the side of the bed and started to examine Cate's stitches. Bernie worked in silence while she checked everything, once she moved away from Cate's delicate stomach. Cate spoke up.
'So, that was interesting.'
'What?' said Bernie looking up from the monitor.
'The way you couldn't take your eyes off Ms Campbell as she left.'
'I don't know what you are talking about' she said as she tucked a piece of hair behind her ear.
'You can't fool me. I've been there got the t-shirt. No seriously, Robyn had one made up for me on our first anniversary.'
'This isn't something we should be discussing.'
'Maybe not. But here's my unwanted advice. Don't let her go. She feels the same. Trust me, I know these things.'
Bernie frowned, before she could reply Robyn came bouncing back.
'Can I?'
'Sure, I am all done here,' said Bernie pulling off her gloves and throwing them in the bin.
'How is she?'
'Doing well, we will be moving her to Keller in a short while where she will be able to recover in peace. Things get a bit hectic here,'
'Okay, Thank you.' Said Robyn.
'Yes, thank you Ms Wolfe, Ms Campbell said you are the best trauma surgeon in the UK. Look like she was right,'
Bernie smiled and nodded, 'I'll come and check up on you in a while,'
They smiled then turned to each other. Bernie made her way to her shared office. Serena was sitting staring intently at patient file as Bernie entered.
'She is doing well.'
'Good,' Serena didn't look up from the file. Bernie started ringing her hands as she went to sit down at her desk. She jumped when Serena started speaking. 'Bernie, do you… would you like to join me for a drink in Albie's this evening?'
'Oh, hmm, well, Yes, why not.'
'Good,'
Both Serena and Bernie bent their heads trying to hide their elated smiles from one another.
Serena arrived at Albie's first, and ordered two glasses of Shiraz, then went to sit in a secluded corner of the bar. While she waited she played with a only beer mat. Bernie almost made her jump when she appeared towering above her. Serena took a moment to take in the gorgeous sight. She was in her high waisted black jeans again, god those jeans, and tight stripped jumper.
'Is that one mine?'
Serena nodded, unable to get her words out. Bernie took her sit, this felt awkward. What did Serena want? She took a small sip of her wine, hoping the alcohol would take the awkwardness away. She was about to make some awful joke when Serena place her hand on hers.
'Bernie, about last week… and the week before,'
'I thought we'd agreed to put that behind us, that is was the wise thing to do'
'One, we didn't agree you said and I was too stunned to say anything, let alone do anything about it. Two, it might be wise, the sensible thing to do. But I am through with being sensible. Sensible got me into the bitter ex-wife club, sensible got me almost back together with my loser ex. I am done.'
She moved towards Bernie's lips, giving her time to move away, but she stayed stocked still. When their lips met, it wasn't earth stopping, firework exploding, however, everything did else just melt away, it was only them. When they cam up for air, they noticed that bar the music there wasn't a sound in the place. Everybody was looking at them. Blush crept over Bernie's face, and Serena started to find the floor very interesting. It was Dom at the other side of the bar with Isaac that broke the tension.
'About bloody time!' and raised his glass to them. Everybody else in the bar cheered. Bernie turned her face to Serena, who was still staring at the floor, but there was a small smile on her lips. With one hand Bernie grabbed Serena's hand, stroking small circles on the back, and with the other she gently pulled Serena's face upwards, thumb resting on her chin and pulled her in for another kiss.
