A/N: I figured there isn't enough fem!harry fics out there, so I decided to write this. And I don't think whoever invented bras would think that they make for the most delicious humour -in my immature mind-. Beware, there's going to be Harry/Draco in later chapters!
Cup Sizes- All Ron's Fault
All he wanted to do was sleep. Sleep and drift into the world of dreams, never to resurface, that is unless food is involved. Yes, Harry Potter was feeling particularly sleepy and lazy that fine summer morning. That is if you called it morning. It was barely three, and most of the world was most likely sleeping.
So why was the raven headed fifth year up this early?
Because his best friend was evil. Yes, Ron Weasley was evil. He had dragged Harry's lazy arse out of bed and into The Burrow's kitchen, to do some snooping.
Snooping? That wasn't very Gryffindorish of the two. You see, the night before this fine summer morning, the twins Fred and George were brewing something fishy.
Not fishy as in suspicious, because the prank-loving twins were always up to this kind of thing, so it didn't really surprise anyone anymore, but seriously fishy.
Meaning it smelt disgusting.
"Ron, what in the bloody hell is this?" Harry hissed, still grumpy that he was missing his beloved sleep. Ron just shrugged, "I don't know mate, my Fred and George made sure for me not to know."
"Yeah, so they'd just leave it out in the open like that. Really not wanting you to see." Harry snapped sarcastically at the ginger, rubbing his eyes tiredly, contemplating if he should just fall asleep on the kitchen counter right that second.
"You sure a tad bit frumpy this morning. Anything wrong?" Ron asked innocently, knowing full well why his best mate was in a Hermione-type mood.
Harry just made a pissed-off noise, not even bothering with a reply. "I think I know what it is, mate." Ron finally said after a moment of pause.
"What is it, you bloody wanker?" asked Harry, not really caring to be honest. "It's a prank-potion. We should use it on Malfoy tomorrow on the train!" Ron's blue eyes glinted excitedly.
"What kind of prank-potion? What if it's some super dangerous one?" asked Harry, not really wanting to be in more trouble after his adventures in detention in fourth year.
"Since when did we care about the well-fare of Malfoy?" asked Ron laughing. "Touche, Weasley." Harry returned, remembering the 'Potter Stinks' badges that a certain lovely ferret had endorsed.
He smiled as he replayed the scene of Professor Moody turning the 'poor bloke' into a pure white ferret. It still brought tears of laughter to his eyes.
The raven looked back at Ron, who was busy ladling the putrid potion into three containers. "Why three?" Harry asked curiously.
"One for Malfoy, one for Crabbe and the other for Goyle." Ron responded happily screwing the caps on and popping it into his backpack, and then started laughing manically. "Oh ferret, you are so dead."
Harry rolled his eyes at his best friend, "Why the heck did you not get into Slytherin, you evil snake?" Ron laughed and pulled Harry back into their shared bedroom.
Now The-Boy-Who-Lived was happy. He now had a way to get revenge on Malfoy, and he was in a nice warm bed, soon cuddling into sleep. Life was good. Little did the two know that tomorrow was going to be a whole different story.
The next morning, Harry was again shaken awake by his dear old chum. "Wakey Wakey, time to shakey! C'mon Mate, we gotta get up!" Ron yelled, practically jumping on poor Harry's chest.
Said boy groaned and finally sat up, running a lazy hand through his unruly hair. "Fine, fine." He muttered and allowed himself to be dragged down several flights of stairs and somehow ended up on a stool in the kitchen. "Good morning, dears!" Molly Weasley's kind voice sounded from above the sizzling of the pan, where delicious smells were making its way into the all the residents of the Burrow, and Harry felt instantly not sleepy. "'Morning," Harry and Ron chirped at the same time to the caring redhead.
She levitated platters of biscuit and muffins onto the table with a simple flick of her wand. Eat up, sweethearts. And eat full; I wouldn't want for you to get hungry on the train. But just in case, your lunches and snacks are all in you knapsacks, loves." She told them all from her seat as she flicked her wand again and orange juice poured itself into glasses for everyone. "And congratulations on our ickle Ronnie-dear to be a prefect this year." Molly's eyes practically glowed with happiness and pride.
Ron's cheeks and ears were washed with a reddish tint, blushing at the nickname and attention as all the Weasleys cheered.
During the entire breakfast, Fred and George were snickering and laughing between themselves, making Harry wonder what it was that was so funny.
After the satisfying meal, Arthur and his wife Flooed them all into Kings Cross Station with their trunks and all and pushed them through station nine and three quarters. After many kisses and double checks on Molly's half and words of caution on Arthurs half they sent Ron, Harry, Ginny and the twins onto the train.
Waving at them as they looked on from the windows, Hogwarts Express pulled out of the station, becoming no more than a fleck of light in the dark tunnel.
The Golden Trio met up at their usual compartment, only to find out it was taken by two seventh years snogging. Thoroughly disgusted, they moved their way into a different one awkwardly. The last one was the one taken up by a one Draco Malfoy and co.
The gang sulked at their luck, and sat as far away as them as possible. Which was almost impossible considering it was a very cramped compartment. "Potter. Weasel-bee, Mudblood." Malfoy spat in our faces as his suck-ups snickered behind him. Ron winked at Harry to start the 'plan'.
"Malfoy. Same stupid insults as last year? Grow up." Harry growled, and as he and Malfoy had a row, Ron secretly put a Glamor charm on the containers to make them look like the drinks on the table, and switched them up, amazed that they didn't notice.
Slytherins took insulting and bullying to a whole different level.
Nudging his best mate 'accidentally' to let him know the deed was done. He soon died out his conversation with the bratty Slytherins to just mutual glares of hatred. Harry was good, real good.
This little 'staring contest' went on for quite a bit, until Crabbe, went to reach for his backpack which was on the table, knocked over the containers full of the potion- all onto Harry and Ron's laps. Their eyes widened as suddenly they were being shrunk.
Their shoulders shrunk, their muscles disappeared, their waists expanded and this is where they knew they were suddenly going to be turned into a bunch of bints while Malfoy was laughing, also had figured it out. And then, you guessed it, it happened. Harry felt an awkward tingling sensation in between his legs as he felt his ahem poof away from his body. And then his chest suddenly felt ridiculously heavy, his ahem cookies shall we say were now sticking out from his chest. Malfoy started laughing especially hard at that.
"Hey Potter, nice tits." Draco sneered; staring straight at Harry's uh, cookies.
Harry growled, "Shut it, you wanker."
Draco sniffed, "At least I can wank, you don't even have it anymore!"
"Why you lit-" Harry didn't even get to finish his sentence before his hair suddenly started growing at a break-neck pace, soon his jet black hair was reaching his waist. Ron's did as well, just shorter, at a modest shoulder length, and soon, there were really a bunch on chicks.
"No!" Ron wailed, tugging at his hair, expecting to just be able to wake up and see he was still in The Burrow, and never did this nightmare happen.
Draco and co. practically exploded with laughter. Never had he seen so hilarious, here Potter was sitting right in front of him with his sidekick, now a bunch of bints!
Hermione tried to comfort them, but it was now awkward to hug either of them, so she stayed to being quiet. "Now I'll never be" able to get the girls! They'd all think I was a bloody dyke!" Ron wailed, imagining being laughed at for hitting on a female.
Malfoy hooted with laughter, "That's because you are a bloody dyke now, Weasel-bee!"
Ron sniffed, "Bloody hell. I just had a strange need to cry for a second there. My hormones are so out of check." He said in a rather girly voice.
Harry just clutched at his jet-black hair, and his now ridiculously thin figure, before turning to Ron. "You little brat! It was ALL your fault!" he yelled, slapping the him/her across the face. "Chick fight! Chick fight!" Malfoy cheered eagerly.
"Hey Harr- What the bloody hell happened." Ginny gaped at the site of her brother er sister and his/her best friend in girl form.
Ron and Harry both refused to answer, so Hermione did with a sigh. "They were idiots and tried to use this on Malfoy and his gang but it spilt on them so now it's them who got effected."
"Damn. You guys are idiots," Ginny snickers very Slytherin-like, "Oh and Ronnie and Harriet (insert epic face here) would you like to borrow a bra? You really don't want anyone to see your boobies sticking out like that."
Ron and Harry sputtered, "Nice, Weaselette," Draco laughs even harder.
She smirks before gaping at Harry. "Never mind, Harry! My bra would never fit you! You have got to be at least a D!" she said in awe, before getting a flick on her face.
"STOP TALKING ABOUT IT." Harry whisper-shouted through his teeth, thoroughly embarrassed.
Ginny just held her hands up innocently and disappeared, not to be seen again.
The Golden Trio followed her to leave, not wanting to be made fun of anymore. Harry, grumbling to herself and accidentally bumped into Seamus, who catcalled and tries to flirt. Harry growled, and ran away to Lavender Brown's compartment.
She almost squealed. "Oh. My. GODS! You and Ron would look so beautiful and cute if I'd just give you a makeover. Pretty, pretty please!" she begged for knew victims for her makeover.
After almost an hour of convincing they finally gave in and allowed themselves to be dragged into the part of the train where the bathrooms were. They faced the identity crisis of not knowing which one to go to, and decided to just pull it together and go into the girls.
After a torturous hour full of hair plucking, hair cutting and cookie measuring, Harry and Ron emerged from the bathroom, now in a bra and more feminine form fitting clothes, courtesy of a certain Lavender Brown.
"This thing is uncomfortable!" Ron groans plucking at the straps of the lacy pink bra.
"Stop complaining! It should be Harry that's complaining since I don't have a D sized bra. I have teenie weenie pimples for bazooms." Lavender sighs, stroking her chest affectionately.
"Do all girls act like this?" Harry asks, creeped out.
Lavender just rolls her eyes and pushes the two he turned shes into the compartment, admiring her handiwork.
Yep, she'd turned ugly into fantabulous. Go her!
And they really were. Harry's hair now had soft curs in it and was still waist length, amazingly. His arms and legs were now smooth and hair free, and damn his new glasses finished him off. Ron was still hot, even as a straight girl she could say that. Her red hair was now straight and clipped of split ends. His arms were also smooth and hair free, as was his legs.
Ron turned and checked himself out in the reflection in the window. "Bloody Hell! I'm hot!"
Harry did say anything, "Hot or not, I still hate you for doing this to me."
A/N: Okay, sorry for shortness, but now I'm tired! I'll see you next time! Tell me how to improve, this is my first Harry Potter fic!