Harry Potter's Long Lost daughter: Love defined

chapter 11:

by: itwilleatyourbabies

I don't and never will own harry Potter

A/N: AM I BACK? Yeah, I'm back, I know it's been like eight years, but I was kinda at a loss with this story SO GUESS WHAT! I'm rewriting it. (fun fact: I have never finished a fanfiction before in my entire life and I've been writing them since 2008) Things are a bit different now so I'll put them here real quick and if you don't want to read them you can just skip to the actual story (but you should totally read them)

_Things_

So since we last spoke the following things have happened:

I got on the path to beating my eating disorder (yay)

I got a therapist

I'm not longer suicidal

I started listening to 21 pilots

I started watching youtubers

I haven't cut in two months (which is a really big deal for me, okay?)

I became a feminist (I always was one, I just never knew what it meant, ya know)

I found I identify with biromantic asexuality

I stopped shipping scorpily (so I will take this story out of the scorpily tag)

and I've decided Lily Luna Potter is a homoromantic demisexual (if you don't know what that is I wouldn't mind telling you.)

I'm officially XVX (vegan and straight edge)

Now on with the story

I used to believe fairy tales existed, black words on the stark white pages that stood out like the black and white lines of life. But somewhere along the way those lines got twisted and broken until they all weaved together in a cloudy world of gray. The color dissolved from my world, like a warm breath from a living soul into the frigid cool air on a dark day in November. it started in my eyes , the loss of color I mean, the beautiful emerald that stood out stark against my pale skin, shone bright with childish wonder and amazement, they showed every emotion, but that was gone now- faded into a dull green; like I had cried so hard and so loud that the sadness just washed out with my tears. But now as I stared down and the blood that drip down from my nose, I knew the truth- the world had no color it only has the burning sensation of the blood that now I could now only remember- stinging and tearing at my physical and emotional body like the memories I had buried so deep inside me that they consumed my every molecule.

And now it is to the point where I Ask myself:

"when physical scars fade are the emotional one gone?"

I think about those days a lot, where every day blended into another, and added the molten volcano that I considered my life, I think about that Molten pit even more, and how in those days I couldn't have even come close to telling you about how one day that volcano was going to explode (a/n don't even give me that bullshit about how volcanoes don't "explode" because mount st. Helen's did) and everything was going to be affect and nothing was going to be okay.

It was on that cloudy day in December where I couldn't get comfortable with Scarlet and I could get comfortable in my own bed, and so I headed out to the burrow, the dark looming cloud over my head that was the funeral was still bright in my mind and so I knew Grandmother wouldn't even have been home. as I unlocked the rickety door to the garden and stepped over the leaves that now consumed the dilapidated steps and unlocked the door, I think some how- I already knew what I was looking for, I just simply didn't understand it quite yet- at least not physically.

The attic was windy and cold when I finally got up there, I didn't know the last time somebody had been up there but it probably hadn't been since the death of Uncle Percy late last September (and on Lucy's birthday) but I quickly found what I was looking for, the diary that chronicled my days from four years old cooped up in my little attic room, all the way down to my wedding day, I swore I never read it again, but I had also sworn I would never be happy, and now Here we were. I opened up the tattered cover of my diary, loose pages and pictures- some drawn and some real- spilled onto me as the memories washed over me. I sat back against a box and grabbed a blanket from the pile of things I had brought up the stairs with me, also including a cup of coffee and a pillow. I turned to the first page and started reading. And it was on that day up in the cold windy burrow that I read my old diary, memories and pain and darkness plunged over every page as I reentered my world of deepening gray, I uncovered the secrets I would need to make everything okay.

A/N I know this was such a short chapter but I just wanted to make it quick and simple (at this point this chapter is going to be more author's note than actual writing.) also, the original author is going to be restarting her version of this story so if you want to read that I will link it in my bio somewhere. I'm going to be changing things up a lot, but please stick around because I know it will be great (trust me)

Songs I listened to whilst writing this chapter:

house of wolves by: My chemical romance

trees by: twenty one pilots

reincarnate by: motionless in white

joy riding by: Frnk Iero and the cellabration