Holding On

Summary: An old woman sees glimpses of the life she once had but lost as her time runs out. AU

The sun was slowly setting against the backdrop of the city. From the bed in her tiny room an elderly woman sat watching the red sunset through her window with a look of longing in her warm brown eyes. She didn't like staying in this room, but the people in white…who were they? The woman didn't know, and as she thought about them she pulled a warm blanket that was draped around her shoulders closer. When they would come to speak with her the people in white were kind, but she did not know them and it frightened her.

In fact, she didn't even know where she was or even who she was. The woman scrunched her aged but warm eyes and tried to remember…but nothing came. She glanced toward the door and saw, to her bitter disappointment as she let out a pitiful moan, that the door was still shut. Why was the door always shut? If it would only open then she could go…somewhere. That train of thought disappeared suddenly from her mind as she let go of her comforting blanket and refocused her gaze on the setting sun since it seemed to help dispel her unease. What was she feeling uneasy about? Ah…yes the door…

A different kind of moan came as she looked at the red sun, and she still could not figure out why it was having this kind of effect on her. Suddenly an image that she did not recognize flashed into her mind…it was the figure of a young man, but…surely this could not be real? The woman had never seen any people other then the people in white and the people who walked beneath her window. None of them had such beautiful golden eyes or wore cloths of such vibrant red. The woman began to grow sad…was this beautiful man real or only a dream?

He still stood there in her minds eye as vivid and real as anything she could remember. He was so real in fact that the old woman jumped up and gasped believing that surely this young man was here…here for her. He was reaching out his hand for her with a look of irritation on his face. Then he began to speak. Even though his words were muffled her eyes widened with joy and she didn't know why. Finally a word this angel or dream, for surely only an angel or a phantom could have such an appearance, was saying stuck out it was "Kagome." Sadly the woman suddenly found herself now standing in her little plain room with no such man before her. She suddenly felt such a strong feeling of anguish that she began to weep in earnest. Her knees buckled beneath her and she fell to the floor with a loud BANG but she did not notice. She wept bitter tears as she said pleadingly, "No…no…come back." Try as she might she could not summon back up the image of the handsome man or even bring back his comforting voice.

The door opened loudly as a concerned voice asked kindly, "Miss Higurashi?" The woman in white spotted the elderly patient on the floor weeping and moved quickly to help her back into bed. The young woman covered the shaken patient with more blankets as she asked gently, "What's all this madam? Everything will be alright," she smiled warmly at the older woman who calmed slightly. She stuttered out, "Where…where is…the man," the young woman frowned as she replied, "Man? There's no man in here…perhaps you were having a nightmare?"

The older woman shook her head in a vigorous denial as she suddenly blurted out, "I…I'm Kagome," she looked to the young woman with uncertainty. She smiled and replied in a soothing tone, "Yes madam and I am your nurse, Yuki. I'm here to take care of you." Kagome only stared back at the nurse since she didn't really understand what was going on, and this made her sigh as she turned again to look at the window. The old woman muttered quietly, "He…spoke to me…called me Kagome." Unfortunately the sun had set, and with it went any chance of summoning back the image or the voice of the handsome man.

Yuki quietly exited the small room turning of the lights and carefully shutting, and locking, the door behind her. Kagome blinked in the weak light of twilight before finally closing her eyes and losing herself to dreams. Dreams of love and adventure which were unfortunately forgotten by the time she was awakened by a strange woman in white (did she not know this woman?) coming into her room with a tray of food…

The days blurred by for the old woman who could barely hold on to memories for an hour and definitely could remember nothing of the day before. Every sunset her kind nurse would check on her patient to find the poor woman weeping over some imaginary man. Yuki finally decided to cover the patient's window with a blanket each day just before sunset since it was obvious that whatever memories or images that time of day triggered in Miss Higurashi were painful for her.

This plan worked on the first day, but the nurse noted that her patient became very agitated around sunset. Still this was better then the weeping and emotional rollercoaster she would have been experiencing otherwise. Or so she told herself. Another part of her was less sure of this plan. On the second day, however, Yuki peeped into the old woman's room and was shocked to find Miss Higurashi gazing out the window at the sunset with tears rolling down her wrinkled cheeks. The blanket that the nurse had secured in the window was lying on the floor where it had been thrown by the person it was supposed to be protecting.

Yuki took a few slow steps into the room and softly inquired, "Miss Higurashi what do you see?" The old woman continued to train her warm brown eyes on the dying sun but fresh tears coursed down her ancient face. Finally she whispered, "Inuyasha…" The nurse frowned slightly but foolishly replied, "Who is he?" It was the wrong thing to say. She realized this immediately, but before Yuki could say anything else her patient began to rock back and forth on her bed. She never took her eyes off of the setting sun.

Kagome loudly yelled, "I DON'T KNOW! Who is HE?! Who am I?" She glanced at the shocked nurse with wild eyes and screamed, "WHO ARE YOU?! WHERE AM I?" Yuki stepped back as her normally easy-going patient suddenly jumped up and rushed towards the door, and freedom, as quickly as her old legs would carry her. The nurse realized that it had been a mistake to leave the door open and grabbed her patient by the arms who began to scream in a heart breaking way. Yuki gradually forced Miss Higurashi back onto the bed while her patient begged, "Please let me go. If I find him he'll tell me who he is, and who I am and why I have to be here."

The nurse tried to calm the distraught woman when she said, "Miss Higurashi everything will be alright. I'm here to help you." However, Kagome began to struggle harder as she continued to beg her nurse to let her go. Yuki finally yelled out, "I NEED A HAND IN HERE." Kagome didn't understand what was happening when more people in white crowded around her. Then she suddenly felt a small prick and had an undeniable urge to close her tear filled eyes and sleep…

Yuki was a good nurse. She had seen many people die, and the deaths of people who were placed in her care during their last days always had an effect on her. However, when she looked back on the final day of Kagome Higurashi's life she could not help but to feel a very deep sense of pain and sadness that was deeper then what she had felt about any other patients death.

Perhaps it was because of the sad life the poor woman had led before being placed under the nurse's care. Kagome Higurashi had had a seemingly normal childhood, but something happened during the woman's adolescence that must have had a profound impact. Yuki didn't know what it was, but from the chatter of visitors, how few there were, who came to visit Kagome she did know that at one time Miss Higurashi had been a warm and friendly girl who had enjoyed life. However, in her teens something changed dramatically.

Over time the happy young woman had grown silent and slowly seemed to lose the spark of joy that had once been her defining feature. As she grew older, Kagome had remained in the shrine that had been her childhood home even after the death of her grandfather. Sadly the young woman's mother had died not many years afterwards, and Kagome's younger brother had by this time married and started his own small business. Yuki learned that as the years past those who had been close to Kagome slowly dropped away until by the time her illness came only a nephew and his two daughters had much of anything to do with the reclusive woman.

At first Kagome's nephew had come often to visit her, and had been a great comfort to the elderly woman. However, as the illness progressed and his aunt slowly began to die the young man's visits were spaced further apart and finally one day he told his dying aunt goodbye and never returned. What made it even sadder was that soon afterwards Miss Higurashi no longer even knew that she had a nephew. How tragic.

On the day that Kagome's body finally gave up on her the old woman was again weeping over the mysterious man whose image would come to her from time to time. She was frightened because the strange people in the white clothes were all around her, and she felt pain all through her ancient body. As the day came to an end she felt such a strong urge to just close her eyes and sleep forever. Then the image of the handsome man appeared just behind one of the scary people in white. His golden eyes were unreadable; the voices of the other people in room began to slowly get softer and softer until she could no longer hear them.

Finally the handsome man spoke to her as he said, "Kagome. It's time…" The people in white began to move frantically as a loud noise sounded from a piece of equipment, but the old woman was listening to the strange man so closely that she didn't notice this. She didn't even notice that she no longer felt any pain. Wordlessly the handsome man reached out his hand. Trembling, the old woman tried to lift her own to his, but to her surprise it was not the ancient hand she was used to at all.

Kagome felt herself slowly rising (but surely she wasn't moving?) and her confusion vanished as her hand met his. The veil was torn away and so was the despair she had felt. Beside them one of the doctors said softly, "I'm sorry Yuki, she's gone," the woman who had faithfully cared for Kagome began to cry loudly as her former patient looked on with a sad smile. There was no need for Yuki to weep for her…there was no more pain, no more sadness, and as her love slowly led her away from her body she knew that there was nothing to fear. She was with the one she loved, the one she had never forgotten, and that was all that mattered now. She was with the man whose image had resurfaced in her mind at the sunset. Inuyasha.

Authors Note:

I'm back :) I know this might seem a little depressing but I couldn't get the idea out of my head. Please let me know what you think of this one-shot.