Marceline floated above her living room floor, gliding around in aimless circles. Her eyes were glazed over, her thoughts distant and far away, dwelling in a part of her mind that had, up until a few hours previously, been calloused and disconnected.
But not forgotten. Never forgotten.
She slid down onto the ground and sat for a moment before clambering to her feet and beginning to pace the floor. Without even thinking about it, her legs found air again and she was floating around in circles once more. She couldn't help it, she felt restless.
And the restlessness of her body didn't even begin to rival the restlessness of her mind.
She kept the shirt.
The words were stale by now and they had become that way only a short while after their conception.
A part of her had thought that by transforming into a wolf-like creature and chasing Finn, Jake and Princess Bubblegum with insincere threats of murder, she would be able to chase that thought away too.
But it wasn't that easy. It never had been.
Marceline sighed, soared upstairs, grabbed her axe-bass and floated back down to the living room, leaning the instrument against her knee and strumming a few notes.
Music. Music would help. For centuries, music had articulated the thoughts there seemed to be no words for and voiced the pain no one wanted to admit to. Marceline had seen it happen often in her long life; a life that had endured its fair share of sadness, of disappointment, of heartbreak and of loss. But there had been plenty of good times too; times flavoured with happiness and relief, contentment and safety, laughter and friendship...even love.
But those feelings and emotions had a habit of constantly coming back to one thing in particular. No matter what she did, the theme of Marceline's life frequently boomeranged back to loneliness.
How many times had she felt that deep coldness shaking inside her very self, cascading like an icy waterfall through every part of her, threatening to rip her subtly and silently apart?
She didn't cry a lot (she liked to think never) but when she did, it was because of that sub-zero emotion...loneliness.
And then there was her time with Bonnibel Bubblegum.
How did she even begin to describe that?
It had been like complete euphoria, sheer pleasure, unfiltered and absolute happiness.
And it had amazed her, in the most awe-inspiring and frightening way. She had been in love before of course; but never so entirely, so intensely...so dangerously.
Because at the finish of that joy, when it had all come crashing to an end, she had felt a loneliness more frosty and dilapidating than she would have ever imagined possible.
Only barely realizing it, Marceline had found a riff to match her pensive and forlorn train of thought. She smiled sadly at its flawlessly melancholic nature and then began to sing.
Saccharine lady, I can't believe I left a mark on you,
I never thought I was worth keeping in your memory,
I wouldn't have guessed, I never knew,
Sweet lady, you made me feel complete in every way,
And I never thought I filled you up too,
I wouldn't have guessed, until today.
She hummed the next few bars, letting her mind wander over rhymes and rhythms until she found the right lyrics for the chorus.
You come across my mind from time to time,
I remember how you found me,
When I needed someone,
When I needed sugar for my coffee,
You come across my mind from time to time,
Life was dull before you came to me,
When I needed someone,
When I needed sugar for my coffee,
And OK, I'll confess that I'm not being truthful,
When I say from time to time,
Because if I'm honest princess,
I'm still yours and you're always on my mind.
The notes stopped abruptly. Marceline had scared herself with the honesty of that last line.
I'm still yours and you're always on my mind.
She floated above the carpet for a moment, feeling shocked and afraid as realization slowly spread over her like an invisible blanket.
She still loved the ruler of the Candy Kingdom.
Her next words echoed around her whole, empty house.
"That is jacked up."