A/N: Haha... I'm working on 17 new fics at the same time when all of sudden, this idea pops into my head... XXD I'm insane... lawl
I'm thinking this might be slightly like the D Files, only I'm making this one a yaoi instead of NejiTen... (not to mention I'm using email instead of Tenten's diary! XD)
Pairing: KakaIru... there'll probably be hints of other pairings too...
Rating: Teen... might go up if this isn't a oneshot
Authoress: Moi! Er... ehehe... Atari Atagashi-Chan
FULL summary: Iruka was living a normal life across the internet, having his second job being a psychiatrist through email to people he didn't know. But, when someone familiar emails him saying that he loves someone, what will our Academy Teacher do?

Disclaimer: I don't own the Naruto series

XXX

Iruka yawned as he walked home to his house from another exhausting day at the ninja academy. After opening the door, the nin closed it and locked it, trudging wearily up to his bedroom. He wanted to go to sleep, but he knew he had his other job to maintain.

His other job was helping kids and/or adults through email consult their problems and to help them through hard times and suffering.

So, as usual, he pushed the on button to his monitor and the screen flashed brightly to life. Iruka sighed and double-clicked on his internet shortcut, opening a window with adelphia as it's homepage. He clicked into the browser and went to hotmail. After typing in his password, the page renewed itself to his mail inbox. He scrolled through about twenty emails and sighed as he realized he had to answer them all. So, he decided to get it done as fast as possible.

It wasn't that he didn't like the job, it was just that it was quite troublesome to come home every night after a grueling day keeping the academy students in line to have to answer emails from other children and families throughout the world.

He clicked on the first one and began to read. He noticed that this person was a first-timer in getting help over the internet, seeing as the person had an sn Iruka didn't recognize. He smiled at the thought of someone new and read on.

Umm... this is my first time doing this... and I debated for a really long time on whether to get help or not... but I finally decided to do so, seeing as one of my friends' has been telling me to get help for a while, now. Umm, well... I guess I'll tell you my problem... You see, I've been getting slightly depressed lately... I don't know what's going on. Normally, in the daytime, I'd be teaching three students in the area of ninpou... but, they've all left me... and the one I loved most became evil and is now helping our arch-nemesis destroy the village I live in. I don't know what to do with myself now... In my past, I lost everyone I ever knew to a demon with that they call the kyuubi. (If you've ever heard of it...)

Iruka stopped, straightening up and fully awake now.

'The nine-tails...' He thought, his jaw ajar slightly.

My father committed suicide when I was little and I've killed so many because I was on a specialized force to village I live in called the ANBU... I did it when I was a kid and now I'm regretting every second of it. I've even tried to commit suicide before. And, now... I've fallen in love with someone the same gender as me... I don't know what's wrong with me! Can you help?

Signed:

Scarecrow15

Iruka gulped. He had never dealt with a gay relationship before. At least, he assumed this person was a guy. He knew this person must live in Konoha, being on the ANBU forces AND mentioning the kyuubi... Iruka's eyes snapped open.

"An ANBU when he was a child... there was only one person on the ANBU forces as a child... and that's... Ka...ka...shi..." His words slowed like molasses as the realization hit him. He gulped and looked at the screen name. Scarecrow15. He knew that there was something about Kakashi meaning scarecrow in english... and the 15 must stand for his birthday! His birthday was on September 15th! And... the friend who had been nagging him to go get help had been Iruka, himself!

The brown-haired chuunin slowly swallowed his saliva.

"I... can't tell him it's me... but... the same gender...? Who..." He wondered aloud, trying to think of who the hell Kakashi could possibly like? The Hatake had never been gay before... what was making him feel this way now? "...To tell the truth, I'm jealous..." Iruka whispered after checking to make sure he was really alone. He sighed and thought for a moment.

"Hnn... what to do, what to do... Should I write back to him, telling him my name? Or... should I go along with it...?" Iruka remembered that it was his duty as an internet psychiatrist to keep his identity secret, so he decided to write back, pretending he didn't know who it was.

Dear Scarecrow15,

I'm glad you decided to write to me. I can understand how you feel about loosing many precious to you. I've, sadly, had the same experience... also by the kyuubi. I don't know much about your past,

'...damn.. that was a lie...' Iruka thought guiltily. Kakashi had told Iruka everything about his past. And Iruka remembered it well.

...but, maybe I can help.

I'm getting the impression you're feeling guilty about not being able to bring the ones you killed back to life. You're probably feeling stressed that you were only a child and didn't know any better... But, if you want to make up for it, do it by helping others and maybe try getting a job where you wouldn't have to work with students (so you won't be reminded of the three you had priorly) and make sure it's something that'll keep you busy and not thinking about it.

Of course, there is a downside to that. I'd say that in this situation, confronting your problems would be the best way to go. Maybe find a counselor you're comfortable in opening up to and have weekly sessions. Or maybe you could try to find yourself a spouse that you'd feel comfortable in telling everything to them.

But I will tell you is this. Don't try to get yourself drunk and don't try to commit suicide. That won't help at all and, if anything, it will only make your problems worse. Please act rationally.

As for falling in love with someone the same gender as you? I'm afraid I'm not too experienced in that region. You're the first to come to me with this problem (surprisingly enough). I'll try to go with my best instinct though.

I'd, personally, say to give it up. You can never be together and fate will, eventually, pry you two apart. Sometimes, that may be more than difficult to do, depending on if you really love them or not.

I believe your feelings of love and desire for someone the same gender as you may just be because you are feeling depressed and such. You may not realize it, but your body will automatically respond to this situation with a need for anothers' warmth and care.

Also, if this other person has been a childhood friend, or maybe someone who understands you, then you'll also be persuaded by your body to love the other person.

Write back if you need anything else. I will always be glad to help.

-UI

Iruka leaned back in his chair and read it over once more to make sure it was plausible to send out. He hoped with all his might that Kakashi would listen to his advice and not figure out that UI stood for Umino Iruka. He sighed and clicked 'send' and away it went. Iruka stared at the screen for a second, then realized he still had 19 more emails to do. He growled and started on the next one.

XXX

In the morning, Iruka awoke to his alarm clock as usual. He wearily hit the off button and slid out of bed into his slippers. He shuffled slowly into the bathroom and turned on the water to his shower. Stretching, he went over in his mind everything that had happened last night and began to ponder on who it was that Kakashi loved that was the same gender as he. He stripped down and stepped into the steaming hot water, letting the crystal droplets slither down his slender frame. He sighed and tried to think harder.

'Asuma...? No... Gai?... definitely not... wait. He mentioned that 'the student whom he loved' had gone away and became evil... does that mean... Sasuke?' The chuunins' eyes widened as he shook the thought from his mind.

'No, no, NO! That CAN'T be true! I wish he liked me... wouldn't that be something...?' Iruka gave a weak smile to his reflection in the pool of water circling his feet. He hoped to kami-sama that he could break Kakashi and whoever the other guy was up! He decided then and there that he'd do everything in his power to pry them apart!

Little did he know, Kakashi had been talking about him when he wrote it.

XXX

A/N: Blah... very short, ne? Well... yeah. Ten reviews before I update, please! Well, if you want me to update, review! If not, don't review! That's the way I know whether you just stopped reading this after a couple words or whether you actually stuck to it... well... ja!