Chapter 1:

A young blonde girl sat in the corner of an empty train with her face pressed against the window looking out at the world, just as she had been for her entire life. She had always been on the sidelines cheering someone on, but now there was no one left to cheer for. About a week ago, she was happy and nothing could touch her.

Flashback

We were driving all the way from Jersey to New York for the weekend, just me and my kooky parents along with my little sister. We had sing-alongs and I Spy games. We were the perfect family. Right then, we were driving past a cliff edge, when a drunk driver came out of nowhere. He smashed into our side and knocked the car through the steel barrier protecting us from the drop. I guess it wasn't that strong after all. The car was barely balancing on the edge, teetering back and forth. My parents were frozen stiff in the front seat and my little sister was crying in the seat next to me. I instinctively scrambled to open the car door and jumped out as quickly as I could. I reached back inside to grab my sister, but it was too late. The car was already off balance because of my movement. As the car tilted forward, my sister's hand slipped through my own and so did her life. I heard the crash when the car hit the bottom, and I saw the scatter pieces of metal along the rocks. I fell backward onto the dusty road and sat in shock. Not even the police sirens around me could shake me from the fact that I had just killed my family.

End Flashback

A tear ran from dark blue eyes as the girl remembered the accident. She bundled up in a large sweatshirt of her father's to try to keep the demons at bay. The window fogged up, distorting the empty countryside, and she drew tiny hearts with her finger. She stared at her reflection in the window. She saw the small freckles along her cheeks and the scar along her jaw line. But she also saw a broken girl staring back at her. She saw the confusion and the fear. She also saw the anger. This person in the mirror was a stranger to her.

The train slowed as it approached the lonely station. The girl solemnly stood when the train stopped, and she stepped off onto the platform and into her new life. Quickly the seventeen year-old was enveloped in a hug from an old woman. When the lady released her granddaughter from the death grip, the woman looked up at the teenager before grabbing her once again.

"Oh Spencer. I missed you. Are you okay? How are you holding up?" Spencer had grown so used to these common string of questions that all she did was look her grandmother in the eye and coldly reply with the same old lie.

"I'm fine. Everything's fine, Gran." They collected Spencer's luggage and walked to the small car waiting for them at the top of the dirt hill. The ride home was silent, as the girl watched the trees pass by in a blur.

Buckfastleigh was a small, quiet town in the heart of the British countryside. You could run for miles without finding a single being except for maybe a sheep or two. As a young child, Spencer would spend summers there with her family. It was the only place she ever really felt free and the only place she felt hope.

In a short time, they arrived at her grandparents' house. Spencer brought her bags up to the attic and settled into her make-shift bed atop the small cottage. Her grandparents' were the only people who wanted her after what she had done. The moonlight crept in from the small window across from the bed and cast a shadow across her petite form. She heard her grandparents' talking from the kitchen below.

"She's just not right, Jack. She's hurting so much…" my grandmother whispered to my grandfather.

"She'll be fine. She just needs some time to get over it. We just need to give her space, Lorry. She's a strong girl, just like her mother..."

Blue eyes cried themselves to sleep that night, and pale lips whispered pleas for it to all be better. She couldn't take anymore…

Chapter 2:

Spencer awoke the next morning to the sound of eggs frying in the kitchen. She stretched and yawned as she made her way down the narrow stairway in pink and white pajamas.

"Ahh, good morning, love. Your grandfather won't be back 'til late. He left about a half hour ago to take care of some business in Dartmouth. Sit. It's time for breakfast,: Gran exclaimed in her usual cheerful manner. Her grandmother flipped over the pancakes in the saucer. Spencer just blinked and sat down at the dining table. Her grandmother set a plate in front of her, then noticed her granddaughter's distraught look.

"Sweetheart. What's wrong?" The elderly woman questioned while stroking blonde locks. She followed the girl's gaze to the picture of her mother as a child on the mantle. "Oh sweetie." The blonde started to cry.

"I just wish she was here. If it hadn't been for me…" Spencer chocked out between sobs.

"None of it was your fault. No one blames you."

"Yes it was! You weren't there! You don't know!" The pajama-clad girl sprinted out the door and did the thing she did best. She ran.

Chapter 3:

Spencer ran as hard and as fast as she could while her blonde hair whipped around her face. She weaved her way through back alleys until she came to the forest's edge. She ran up the cobbled steps and through the pastures of blackberries. The blonde came to a stop at an old church, burned down years ago. It held so much. She could see an entire life's worth of events unfold before her eyes. She felt everything that had happened there. She knew of the pain and the joy that had affected so many before her. The only remnants of the once great building were the stones littering the ground, the graveyard, and the steps to the bell tower.

Spencer walked up the aisle and looked around with wonder at this magical place. She reached the stairs that led to nowhere and trudged up them. The girl sat at the top crying. She thought of everything she had lost and left behind. She didn't have anything to hold on to anymore. She even contemplated suicide, but was too cowardly to go through with it. Her family was gone because of her, and now she was in the middle of nowhere without a single person to lean on. No matter how nice this place was in the summer, she hated it now. She was trapped on this island with nothing. The only thing around were cows and sheep and old people; not exactly an ideal place for a teenager to live.

A twig snapped behind her, and the blonde twirled around quickly to look upon the intruder. But she saw no one.

"Hey you! What are you doing all the way up there?" A brunette girl emerged from the brush and walked over to the steps. "Are you okay?"

"Y-yeah. I'm fine. I was just leaving." Spencer wiped her eyes and ran past the girl. The brunette grabbed her arm and turned her around.
"Wait, are you crying?"

"No! I'm fine. Just leave me alone." Spencer yanked her arm away and walked into the trees. The blonde stumbled around and tripped on tree roots. For about a half hour, she went in circles swearing that she had seen that bush not two seconds ago. Spencer wandered for about another hour before finally deciding she was lost. She decided to head back to the creek she saw about ten minutes back. The girl reached her destination and sat down by the water, dipping her toes in and scaring the fish away. "Great. Just bloody great. Now I'm going to starve."

"Oh I don't know about that." The brunette plopped down beside her and swished the water around. Spencer just stared at her in disbelief.

"Have you been stalking me?" Spencer asked, getting defensive.

"Uh… no. But when someone I don't know comes into these woods, I tend to get a bit curious. So care to tell me why you were crying?" The brunette finally moved her eyes from the water to look the blonde directly in the eye.

"None of your business," Spencer scoffed.
"Ouch," the brunette faked hurt and raised tanned hand to her heart, "feisty. But no. Really, what's wrong?"

"Just leave me alone," Spencer diverted her eyes to the slowly rising sun.

"Aww… come on," seeing the blonde was not going to answer anytime soon she decided to speak again. "Fine. Be that way." The brunette stood up and started to walk away. "But don't come crying to me when you get lost again." Spencer pondered this for a minute: she could stay here and be miserable, or she could get home and bear the girl's company.

"Hey! Wait up!"

"Well at least I know you aren't a total moron. So who are you? I haven't seen you around these here parts." Ashley jumped up over a branch and landed softly.

"I… uhh… just moved here from Jersey." Spencer attempted the same maneuver but ended up landing in more of a falling flat on her face sort of way.

"Ahh… an American. Explains your horrible sense of direction. But I'm Ashley. And you are?" The brunette said holding out a hand. The blonde accepted it.

"Spencer. You live here?"

"Yep. Moved here from London a while back. It gets kinda lonely sometimes though." The girls kept weaving in an out of trees, while Ashley moved gracefully, and Spencer, like a klutz.

"Understandable." Ashley led them out of the dark trees and into a field filled with sheep. "Umm… Ashley?"

"Yeah."

"Why are we here?"

"You, Spencer... uhh…."

"Barkley"

"Yeah. You, Spencer Barkley, are going to tell me your story. Either that or you don't get home," Ashley said smirking.

"No fair! I'm staving!" Spencer pouted and crossed her arms. Ashley walked over to a tree, picked an apple, and tossed it to her.
"Here ya go, Blondie. Now talk." So Spencer did.

Chapter 4:

Spencer told Ashley the story of her life, just like she wanted. Except for the part about the accident. The blonde left out the parts about the deaths and said that her family wanted her to get closer to her grandparents, so she moved up here. Ashley seemed satisfied with the story, so the girls laid on their backs watching the clouds. The blonde turned to look at the other girl. Her auburn curls fell around her face, and her tanned skin glowed in the warm sunlight. Her eyes were what struck Spencer most, though. She couldn't quite put her finger on it, but the dark brown told her that there was something more to this girl, something hidden. She held herself closely as if scared to let it go; whatever it was.

"Hey Spencer…" the blonde quickly diverted her gaze.

"Mmmm… yeah."

"I think we should head home now. It's getting near lunch and your grandparents' might get worried." Ashley sighed.

"Oh ok," Spencer replied disappointedly. The brunette got a mischievous look on her face. This, however, went unnoticed by the blonde. "Where is home?"

"Oh… just over that hill." The girls walked to the top of the hill and Spencer's breathe was taken away. You could see for miles. Just patches and patches of pastures with a small town nestled between the hills. She could see the small puffs of smoke from the train that gently ran around the station. All of a sudden, Spencer felt a push and landed face first in the mud. She heard Ashley's maniacal laughter as she started down the slope. Spencer jumped on Ashley and threw her to the ground. Both of the girls ran down the hills laughing and playing towards their small home. And in that very moment, Spencer may not have realized it, but she was starting to learn how to move on...

Chapter 5:

Spencer and Ashley spent the next few days wandering through the forests and running in the fields, getting to know each other better. Spencer found out that Ashley was also seventeen. She lived with her mother and had a fat cat named Blimpo. The brunette still didn't know about Spencer's family, but she suspected that the blonde was holding something back. They were down by the creek again, when Ashley decided to ask the question.

"Where really are you parents?" Spencer look shocked, but quickly turned away and into solitude.

"They died." Ashley hugged Spencer from behind, and Spencer leaned into the warm touch.

"Sweetie… I'm sorry. I had no idea." They both just sat there for a long time- minutes, maybe hours- in a comfortable silence that neither wanted to break. When the sun started to set over the pastures, Ashley spoke.

"It wasn't your fault, you know."

"What are you talking about? How did you…" the brunette cut her off quickly.

"My dad. He died when I was fourteen. I blamed myself for years."

"Ash… I'm so sorry." Ashley stood.

"Don't be. Just forgive yourself okay? Cause you'll miss out on so much if you don't." And with that the girl walked away, leaving Spencer to fend for herself. And Spencer ran…

Chapter 6:

Blonde hair whipped around with the wind and shone orange in the shadow of the sun setting over the grassy hills. A bird chirped in the distance, and girl just sat there. Here she was in a town so small, but she learning more than she ever had. And she was growing up, too. A month ago if someone had told her the events that were about to unfold she would have scoffed and ignored them, but now everything had changed. In this island of a town, isolated from the world, she didn't realize it, but she forgave herself for what happened. And in the process, she let another person in. Moving on isn't always the easiest thing, but with the right ingredients and the right people to guide you, you can. She will never forget though. She can, however, decide to live. And that is the hardest thing of all.

Spencer stood and made her back into town. She paused at the church, only to see what had been. Each gravestone had a story, and each got the chance to live. The empty streets were calming as the light summer breeze brushed leaves down the pathway. She wandered through the alleys and climbed the garden wall before arriving at the cottage. The blonde walked up the stairs, into the attic, and climbed into bed.

"See, Lorry, I told you she's strong."

Chapter 7:

Ashley was waiting by the creek for Spencer the next morning. When the blonde arrived, she enveloped her in a hug.

"What was that for?" Ashley wondered.
"Thank you." She just smiled.
"No problem," Ashley ran into the fields. "Now get you butt out here, Blondie, we have some havoc to reek!" Spencer shook her head and followed, with a grin on her face. She would follow the crazy brunette anywhere.

Prologue

The twenty-nine year old brunette swished her feet around in the creek. And waited. She had been waiting for twelve years for the blonde to come back to her. After she turned eighteen, Spencer ran again. It was what she was good at. Except this time she ran all the way back to Jersey. Everyday, Ashley waited for her at the creek to come back. The bond they had formed back when they were kids still stayed. Ashley walked through the woods to the church. She climbed up the bell tower steps and sat at the top thinking, when she saw a blonde head emerge from the brush just like so many years ago. And she smiled.

"Hey you. What are you doing all the way up there?"