Hello everyone!

Well, for those of you who read my story "Dead Decisions", here's the first chapter in my side story "Letters to Sookie - Eric's Journal".

It takes place post "Dead Decisions", obviously.

This is what I have so far. Will be working on it more this week, except for Friday and Saturday, cause it's Christmas! Will be updating either later this week or next Sunday, depending on how much I get down. But I will post until it's done. I hate when I get into a story, and it has no ending.

I will some of my fav's would update. :(

Anywho, Charlaine Harris owns the characters and whatnot, I'm just borrowing.

Speaking of CH, see my authors note at the end. ;)

Snoogans and Snoochie Boochies!

"My wife, what are you doing?" Eric asked as he walked into our bedroom. I was busy getting myself settled into bed with a cup of coffee, some tissues, and the journal he had given me on our wedding night.

"I was thinking, maybe it was time I read this." I said as I pulled the covers up to my waist, and held up the journal. Eric's journal.

Eric cocked an eyebrow, and then walked to his side of the bed, and crawled under the covers with me. He rested his back against the headboard, and then held out his arm so that I could snuggle up next to him.

"Then I will sit with you while you read. Is that alright with you?" he asked. He was a little nervous. I could feel it through our bond. I sent a little love his way, and hoped it would help.

"Its fine. That way I can ask you questions. Do you mind if I read to myself though?"

"Nope."

"Okay." I said, and leaned up to kiss his neck, and then I snuggled up against him, took a deep breath, and opened to the first page.

October 13th 2011

My Beloved,

I am tormented. My soul, my heart, my body longs to be near yours, but I know that right now, it cannot be. I went to your home this evening. I saw you in your room. You had on that hideous sweatshirt you made me wear when I was cursed. I wanted to be that sweatshirt, embracing you. Giving you some sort of comfort… but this path for us is better right now. I am taking you out of harms way the best way that I know how. By removing myself from your life.

I won't be back for some time. There is trouble on the horizon. Hierarchy are speaking of takeovers and battles for our state. I must stay on guard in the coming months. Once this has passed, and Felipe is secure in his position as King of Louisiana, I will come for you, do not doubt that. You will be my bonded, my wife; once more.

Until then.

October 21st 2011

My Beloved,

There was more talk this evening of takeover. Felipe is working to secure his hold on his kingdoms. There is much turmoil in Nevada over the recent events. He is being doubted by his followers, and as a sign of his strength, will be keeping Victor alive and made an example of for those who seek to overthrow him.

I would prefer Victor met his final death.

I would prefer to be the one driving the stake into his dead heart.

I would prefer to be in bed with you at this moment. Kissing your body… making love to you like we did our last night.

These thoughts are dangerous. I find that it's becoming more difficult to stay away from you. My hearts desire.

Pam says my feelings will fade with time. That it will become easier each day to be away from you. I think she is lying to soothe me. Pam says I have not been very "nice" these past two weeks. I don't give a shit about that. I am separated from you, my Lover. I cannot be "nice".

Frankly, I just don't give a damn.

I laughed a little through the tears that were at a steady stream down my cheeks. "Did you watch Gone With the Wind?" I asked.

Eric smiled. "Yes, I watched it."

"And?" I asked, curious as to what he thought of it.

"It was enjoyable. I laughed when Rhett carried Scarlette upstairs after Ashley's birthday party. I thought of when I carried you into Russell's home after you were staked. You referenced that scene then, correct?"

I had to think back. I had been on some heavy duty pain killers then. Yes, I remembered. I had said that, and that was the scene I was thinking of. I smiled up at him, and he used his thumb to wipe away a tear, and then kissed my cheek. I went back to reading.

October 31st, 2011

My Beloved,

It is Halloween. Despite the turmoil in the kingdom of Louisiana, we still threw our annual Halloween party at the bar. Felipe is looking to keep things as normal as possible in this turbulent time. For me, it was no different than any other night these past few weeks. Empty and dull. Pam insisted that I "enthrall the vermin" at some point during the evening, so I took my place in my throne on stage. As I sat there, I thought of the first time you came into my bar. I wanted you then. I wanted to kill Compton and claim you as mine. I vowed to make you mine. I could not have imagined that I would also be yours.

I sent Pam to check on you twice this week. She stayed in the woods outside your home. I envy her for being able to see you.

It isn't safe for me to visit your woods any longer. I fear that soon, it will no longer be safe for Pam.

I have a meeting with Felipe tomorrow evening. I think he means to make me his lieutenant. I will take Victors place in watching over Louisiana. It is not something I want, however I fear that it is necessary.

I lay in my bed as I write this evening. My sheets still smell of you. I would lay here all night and think of you, and smell your scent in my home if I could. It comforts me.

November 22nd, 2011

My Beloved,

I did not intend to have nearly a month past since my last note to you. The situation has gotten worse for Felipe and our state. As I suspected, Felipe has placed me as lieutenant. Pam has unofficially become Sheriff of Area 5.

Mississippi sent assassins last week. They underestimated my ability with a sword.

It reassures me in my decision to leave your life. I could not bare losing you permanently.

I fear that my return to you will take longer than I had expected. But it will happen. You will be mine once more.

Dawn is approaching, and my eyes grow heavy. I beg the Gods to dream of you while I sleep.

December 10th, 2011

My Beloved,

Pam saw you this evening. She tells me you are doing well, but I can sense she is not being completely truthful with me. She tried to hide it, but she should know better. It pains me to think you are unwell because of me.

I want to tell you the truth. I want to go to you now, to comfort you and tell you that I love you, tell you that it was a lie. Everything I said.

I cannot stop reliving that evening in my mind. As I lied to you, and watched your heart break, I wanted to take it all back instantly. I prayed that you understood what I was doing. I pray that you did not mean the things you said.

No, I know you did not mean them. You merely reacted to me. We're you pretending as well Lover? I think perhaps you may have been. Ah Sookie, my little bull-shitter. But then, how could you have known? No, you did not know what I was doing. I can hope that you did, but I know you could not have known my plan. I hope that you can forgive me for it some day.

December 25th, 2011

My Beloved,

I came to visit you this evening. You put up a Christmas tree. I saw you sitting by the fire, and you were crying. I had to leave. I don't think that I will be able to return for some time. Partly because it is getting harder and harder to stay away from you when I do, and partly because there is more danger coming. I will visit you one last time, because I don't want to risk having my last visit to you being one where you are crying. I don't want that to be the last time that I see you if I meet the final death in the days to come.

If fighting comes before I am able to write to you again, and I meet my final death, know that I love you.

Forever.

February 14th, 2012

My Beloved,

It has been some time since I have written to you. Much has happened. But one thing has stayed the same… my love for you.

I miss you more than ever right now. I am incapacitated at the moment. I can do nothing but lay here and think of you. I often think of our time together at my home when we returned from Nevada. That was an amazing week. Staying in bed with you all night and all day. I think it was a sign of my love that we could lay there an entire week, and I did not have to have sex with you, don't you think? You once accused me of trying to "get in your pants". I think we both now know that it is more than that.

But I did want to have sex with you anyway.

I always want to have sex with you.

I'm even thinking about it right now, which is dangerous, since you are not here to assist me with what results when I think of you.

I must go now, Pam is standing in my doorway. She is going to help me shower. It will definatly not be as enjoyable as our first shower, and I must be careful not to think of it while she is helping me, or she will get the wrong idea. Although it would be quite comical.

I love you.

"Why were you incapacitated?" I asked. He hadn't elaborated in his letter.

"I believe the next entry goes into detail on it." he said, and gave me a little squeeze. I was still nestled against him. He was getting nervous again. More so than when I started to read. I sent a little more love his way, but this time, it didn't seem to be helping.

"What's wrong?" I asked. "Why did you get so nervous all of the sudden?"

"I told you before there would be things in there that would be tough for you to read. This next letter I think will be the first of those." he said, and shifted a little so that he was on his side facing me, but still had me in his arm. "You know though, that I love you, and that I loved you then, right?"

Now I was getting nervous. "Yes. I know." I said sweetly to him, and placed a hand on his cheek. "I don't doubt that at all. You should be able to tell that." I said, referring to our bond. He could tell how I was feeling, just as I could tell how he was feeling. He seemed to be calming a little. I gave him a kiss on the lips, and lingered for a moment before I went back to reading.

February 21st, 2012

My Beloved,

I want to start this letter by telling you that I love you. Never doubt that. Ever.

I know Pam visited you last night. I know that you are aware that I have been injured. It is true, that this has been the worst I have been injured in some centuries. There was an attack from Oklahoma. I fought bravely, and with Pam at my side, along with the other Sheriff's from Louisiana, we were victorious, but not without some loss. We are down a Sheriff, and a replacement is being chosen.

I did not escape the battle without injury. I am missing a leg. It was severed just below the knee. The perpetrator met to swift a death at the hands of Pam. It is growing back, however the process is slow and painful. Pam has been feeding me to help the process, but when she cannot, I have had to take blood from others. Other humans.

I don't know what to say to you about this. I only hope that you understand that it was a necessity. I can assure you however that I am only feeding. There is no sex with the donors to my recovery.

If True Blood could be enough to help me through this process, do not doubt that I would be drinking that instead.

This is a reality that I am finding hard to tell you. It's something that I must do. I would prefer to take only from you my Sookie, but since I cannot, I must do what I need to do in order to survive, and see you again.

Never doubt that I love you.

I took myself out of Eric's arm, and set the journal down. I could feel Eric's emotions start to go all over the place. I pulled back the covers on the bed, exposing his leg, and I started to examine it.

"What are you doing?" he asked. It sounded puzzled, nervous, and amused all at the same time.

"I'm looking for a scar." I said.

"You don't believe that it was cut off?" he asked, all puzzle in his voice that time.

"No, I believe you. I just wanted to see it." I said, turning his leg a little. I couldn't see a thing. It was as if it had never happened. I scrunched my face.

Eric laughed a little. "There is no scar. But look," he said, and pulled the covers completely off both legs, "this one is lighter than the other. Do you see it?" he asked. I noticed it when he pointed it out. I was surprised I had never noticed it before. "It's a very subtle difference, but it's there. I don't think you would have noticed if I did not point it out to you. I can hardly tell the difference anymore." he said, and pulled the covers back over his legs, and I climbed back under them with him, and snuggled back against him.

"I'm not upset, by the way." I said to him once I was back in place.

"No?" he asked.

"No. In fact, I'm okay with it. I figured at some point you would drink from someone else. It's a reality that I'm aware of. We weren't seeing each other. I'm honestly just glad that you're still here." I said, and I could feel a huge weight being lifted from Eric.

He kissed me then. It was hard and urgent. I finally got a chance to come up for some air. "What's got into you?" I asked with a little giggle.

"You." he said with a bit of a growl, and with that he decided that it was time to take a little break from reading. My nightgown went flying, and so did his boxer shorts. I showered my body in kisses before he stopped at my center, and lingered there until I was screaming his name, and then he came back to meet my lips. He positioned himself at my entrance, and before he entered, he whispered in to my ear.

"My Lover." he said, and pushed in. I lifted my hips to meet him the rest of the way. "My Beloved." he said as he thrust again. "My Wife." he said as he thrust once more. There was a flood of love and lust and passion coming from him through our bond. It was bringing me to the edge very quickly.

I didn't think it was possible, but somehow sex had gotten better over the last six months. The stronger our bond got, the better sex was becoming. It was mind blowing to begin with, but this was… well, I just didn't know how to describe it.

Eric was hovering over me, thrusting into me at a steady pace. I was on the edge again, and I wanted to take Eric over with me. I lifted my head to his neck, and kissed and licked before I pulled him back down to me. I didn't have to be asked, and I didn't have to ask him anymore before I bit. He loved it when I bit him. I didn't do it often because I wanted to keep it like a treat, but this was for sure one of those times where he deserved a treat. I bit, and sent Eric over the edge, which took me along with him.

He collapsed on top of me, and I hugged him close. "That was…" I started, but lost my words. Eric finished them for me.

"Amazing. It's always amazing with you, my wife." he said, and kissed me before he moved off me, and to my side. He liked calling me his wife now.

Once we were both settled back to how we had been when I started reading, I picked up the journal again, and started where I had left off.

Soooo... did everyone hear the good news this morning?

Charlaine Harris posted that she will be posting the first chapter of DEAD RECKONING on her website... TOMORROW!

www(dot)charlaineharris(dot)com

I don't know about all of you, but I'm WICKED tempted to call out sick to work with a case of "SVM" tomorrow. Especially since I'm in Southern CA, and we are being POUNDED with rain (well, in So. Cal, it's rare, so a few days of rain IS unusual, haha!) and all's I really wanna do anyways is curl up on the couch with a good book (probably Dead to the World), and sip some hot chocolate while I read, and listen to the rain fall.