I am what I am
6:00 A.M. The alarm on my phone rang to signal that it is time that i get my but out of bed and get ready for another day at the hell hole that was called school. I thought my old life was bad but people just don't seem to care about anyone but themselves. For guys the most important things are their dicks and football. For girls the most important thing is either their nails or trying to dress themselves in as little clothing as possible. They may aswell just go to school naked. But i guess thats just my opinion, which is about 99.9 % true.
One more thing i should do before i go and get a shower and head off to school. I should stop being rude and introduce myself. I am Isabella Swan but i prefer being called 'Bella'. I would say i don't have many friends but thats an overstatement: I have one. My best friend is called Alice Cullen and she is the only friend that i have and i totally have a crush on her brother. I'm 18 years old. I like animals a lot and i'm a grade A student. I get picked on a lot because of it but it's not just that. A couple of years ago which is more like 3 years, 4 months, 2 weeks and 6 days I made the most popular girl in school called Lauren Mallory look stupid infront of all of her followers on my first day at that school. It's not as if i meant to but she really didn't understand a word of Italian so i showed her up and pronounced what she was trying to say perfectly and she's hated me ever since.
Visual appearance: I have brown eyes, black hair which i dyed as i hated it when it was brown, naturally pale skin, black painted nails and i'm fairly tall as i'm 5ft 5".
Well i best go get showered otherwise my dad will kick my ass. As he would always say to me 'I am the chief of police, you know' so i have to behave so he doesn't look like the crap father he is. After showering and letting my hair dry naturally i went to my walk in wardrobe to decide on clothes. I ended up in a pair of black skinnyjeans with random holes in (courtesy of me) a black vest top and a black and purple shirt that i left unbuttoned. I then put on my black combat boots. I pulled my brush through my hair once more and then got my bag ready for school.
Notepad, pens, class books, a book to read, IPod, purse and an apple for a snack later. I threw my bag over my shoulder and headed down the stairs. It was nearly 7:30 so i went to the cupboard, grabbed a granola bar and began eating it while reading the newspaper. I then went to the bathroom to out in my clip in hair extension which for today would be purple so it matched the rest of my outfit. After i thought i looked half decent i grabbed my bag and car keys and headed out to my sliver volvo C30 which was a birthday present off my dad. When i got in my car i sent Alice a quick message saying i would be at her house to pick her up in about 10 minutes. And then i drove my usual way to her house as i picked her up for school every morning ever since i could drove. Whilst driving i hooked up my IPod to the cars speakers so that i could listen to some music. I put it on shuffle because thats just me. After two fairly long songs i pulled up outside Alices house. I turned off the engine, climbed out of the car and walked to her front door. I rang the doorbell as usual and once again Esme, Alices adopted mother answered the door.
"Good morning Bella." She enveloped me in a warm motherly hug.
"Morning Esme. Is Alice nearly ready?" I asked and Alice shouted down that she wouldn't be long.
"Are you eating anything? Your all skin and bones. Does your father even feed you? Would you like me to make you some breakfast?" Esme quizzed.
I loved Esme as she was the mother that i never had. My mum died when i was a child because she over-dosed herself of heroin and so i blamed myself that she died because i stressed her out to do that.
"I'm fine. Really." I assured Esme hoping that she would just drop the topic of food. Just then Alice bounded down the stairs and wrapped her tiny body around mine in a hug.
"You ready to go?" I asked her.
"Yeah but could you do me two tiny favours?" She begged.
"Sure. Anything." I replied instantly.
"First off can Edward have a lift as everyone has already set off." She said.
"Of course he can." I smiled.
"And would you go to that party with me? Please please please." She begged and there was nothing i could deny my little pixie friend.
"You really want to go?" I asked.
"Yes, i do." She nodded to me.
"Then i guess we're going." I fake smiled as parties weren't me thing.
"YAY! Thankyou Bella!" Alice cried.
"We're going to be late if we don't leave soon." I said and Alice ran to go get her bag and her smoking hot brother Edward.
"I'll be by my car!" I called to Alice.
"See you after school Esme." I said and hugged her goodbye and then walked over to my car and then climbed into my seat.
A minute later Alive and Edward were climbing into my car. Edward was sat next to me in the passenger seat and Alice was moaning about the rules of shotgun in the backseat.
"Morning Isabella." Edward said politely.
"Hey. And you can call me 'Bella'." I said to him and turned the engine on. It roared to life and then became a beautiful purr as i raced onto the main road to school. Just then my second favourite song began to play.
"What on earth are we listening to Bella?" Alice whined to me.
"River flows in you by Yiruma. Is there a problem with my music taste Alice." I asked her sweetly knowing that she didn't approve of my music taste.
"Yes! It's boring!" Alice complained.
"I think its beautiful." Edward commented.
"Finally! Someone with good music taste. You can ride with me more often Edward." I jokingly said. After me quietly singing, Edward staring out of the window and Alice whining about the music we finally arrived at school.
"Thanks for the lift Bella." Edward said and then walked off. Me and Alice linked arms and then walked over to our first lesson: English. After ignoring the looks of disgust of my style, the comments and rumours about me and the chorus of 'loser' and 'freak' all aimed at me it was finally lunch. I qued up and got some cheese pizza that looked like cardboard but i was a vegetarian so there wasn't really an option of what i could have. After paying for it i was tripped by no ther than Lauren Mallory the queen bitch here and her deciples Jessica and Angela. I fell to the floor covered in my pizza and whatever food they had. I bust out laughing in their faces because it was the best way for me to cope with my anger and i was sure to be kicked out of school if i broke her nose again.
"I heard your going to the partyyou socially retarded freak!" Jessic sneered.
"Yeah i am. Whats it to you?" I quizzed and climbed to my feet.
"I chalenge you to a sing off!" Lauren chalenged me. I thought she sounded like a drowned cat so it couldn't be too hard to beat her.
"Fine, deal, whatever. Your ruining a nice day with that ugly plastic nose. Careful outside you wouldn't want it to melt would you?" I whispered to her.
"Don't you dare say that to me!" Lauren screamed at me.
"Get the hell out of my way!" I half threatened half chalenged her.
"What if i don't want to?" She quizzed.
"Then i will make you move!" I growled at her and then watched as her and her deciples ran off. I walked to the bathroom as i was covered in pizza and bagel by the looks of things. On my way there i bumped into Alice who followed me there and then began helping me get rid of the food. After finally doing all that we could in our limited time, lunch was over so we went to our last lesson which was History. It flew by and in no time i was at Alices with her in her wardrobe finding us something to wear as we were both the same size and Alice loved dressing me up. As she called it Barbie-Bella. My hair was curled and Alice ended up talking me into wearing a short red dress that puffed out a bit from the waist down. I have no idea how Alice did it but she ended up talking me into wearing some black strappy heels that i would easily fall over in if not atleast brake my ankle. Alices hair was also curled into little ringlets and she wore a tight green dress and a pair of matching heels. I grabbed my phone to call my father to tell him i'd be late home to have Alice take him from me and call him herself.
"Hi Charlie, i was wondering if Bella could stay at my house for the night... yeah we were just going to go watch a movie... don't worry we'll be safe... okay see you tomorrow Charlie. Bye!" Alice called down the phone to him and then ended the call.
"I'm stopping the night?" I asked her.
"That way we can stay at the part longer and then we can have a sleepover!" She squeeled and i had to smile at her enthusiasm.
"Um by the way i'm chalenged to a sing off with Lauren Mallory when i get to the party." I explained to her.
"Have you decided on a song?" She asked.
"Yeah, i'm singing my favourite song." I smiled to her.
"I'm sure your going to be awesome."
"Shall we go?" I asked and just then there was a knock at the door.
"One minute!" Alice yelled and turned to me.
"Okay don't freak but i got a date for the party." Alice said to me.
"Thats great. Who is it?" I asked her.
"Jasper Whitlock. He's so amazing and hes one of Edwards friends." She explained to me.
"Okay but why do i feel that theres more in your plan than that." I asked her.
"Edward really likes you and you like him back so i told him he should go with you to the party so hes probaably come here to ask you." She rushed out. There was another knock at the door and Alice ran to the door and had her hand on the handle ready to open it but she didn't, she turned to face me.
"You do like him don't you?" She asked.
"Like is a bit of an understatement." I grinned at her and she squeeled.
There was another knock at the door and Alice swung it open and glared at Edward and Jasper.
"Seriously your so impatient Edward!" Alice yelled at him and then pulled Jasper down the stairs so it was just me and Edward. But of course i would have to leave the room at some point.
"Bells?" Edward caled into the room.
"In here Eddie." I smiled at him as he entered the room.
"Wow, you look beautiful." Edward babbled to me.
"Thankyou you don't look half bad yourself. I heard your my date?" I replied.
"You heard coorect. If thats okay with you. I totally get it if you want to go on your own. Or with someone else..." Before he could say another word i kissed him on the cheek which made him stop rambling on.
"I'm glad your my date." I smiled to him.
"Shall we go?" Edward asked and held his hand out to me. I tangled my fingers with his and replied,
"We shall." And with that we walked hand in hand down the stairs.
"My other beautiful daughter Bella is wearing a dress!" Esme cried to me and ran over and enveloped me in a hug.
"Thanks Esme. For being like a mom to me. Your the best mom a girl could ever ask for." I whispered tearfully to her.
"I want to capture this moment. Carlisle would never believe me without proof. And you all look so amazing." Esme grinned and grabbed her camera and began taking photos of everyone.
Me and Alice. Jasper and Edward. Alice and Jasper. Me and Edward. All of us. And Esme ended up getting in a few photos with us. About 100 photos later we finally escaped. We took my car there as i said i wasn't going to be drinking and with that we walked in pairs: me and Edward, Alice and Jasper, into the big hall where the party was. I turned some heads with the outfit that i was wearing and me and Edward walked over to Lauren Mallory and her deciples.
"Finally decided to show up did we, you freak." Lauren seethed.
"Yeah feel free to go up and attempt to sing a few bars and then i'll follow. Kay?" I smirked at her.
She attempted to sway up to the stage and then Rude boy by Rihanna began to play. She attempted to sing which really was painful on my ears and she couldn't dance that well and it seemed everyone agreed that she was crap. When she was finished she stalked over to me.
"I'd like to see you top that you fucking retard." She spat.
"No problem, by the way you should study sea creatures, especially whales as they would understand you perfectly." I snapped back.
Edward wished me good luck and kissed me on the forehead and with that i dragged myself over to the stage. I thought about starting but then decided on introducing myself first.
"Hi, i'm Bella Swan, the social reject as people like to call me and if it were up to me i wouldn't be here. But my best friend Alice asked me to come to this lame-ass party and then i was chalenged in a sing off with Lauren Mallory so please pick the best singer. I'm singing I am what i am by John Barrowman so i hope you'll enjoy." I smiled at the audience who clapped and someone whistled which could be identified as my best friend Alice. Just then the intro began so i got ready to sing.
"I am what I am It's my world that I want to have a little pride in I am what I am I am what I am There's one life and there's no return and no deposit
I am my own special creation
So come take a look
Give me the hook or the ovation
My world and it's not a place I have to hide in
Life's not worth a dam
Till you can say, hey world, I am what I am
I don't want praise, I don't want pity
I bang my own drum
Some think it's noise, I think it's pretty
[ Lyrics from: .com/lyrics/j/john_barrowman/i_am_what_i_ ]
And so what if I love each feather and each bangle
Why not try to see things from a different angle
Your life is a sham
Till you can shout out loud, I am what I am
And what I am needs no excuses
I deal my own deck
Sometimes the ace, sometimes the deuces
One life so it's time to open up your closet
Life's not worth a dam
Till you can say, hey world, I am what I am"
I looked at Edward the entire time as he seemed to give me strength. When the song finished i stood there panting waiting for their reaction. They all burst out clapping which was deffinately more than what Lauren got so i guess i won that chalenge. I climbed off the stage and leapt straight into Edwards waiting arms.
"Was i good?" I asked.
"Amazing." He whispered back to me. Just then Alice ran over to me and wrapped her tiny arms around me in a hug and Jasper was walking after her.
"Bells you were totally awesome!" Alice shrieked and had a huge smile on her face.
"You were really good Bella." Jasper said to me and then hugged me too.
"Thanks guys." I said to them.
"I love this song!" Alice screamed as an upbeat song came on. Her and Jasper headed over to the dance floor. And then to ruin my mood Lauren stormed over to me.
"You were crap you mentally chalenged freak!" Lauren screamed at me.
"I suggest you walk away right now because frankly we're nno longer under school grounds and i have no promises saying that i have to keep my hands to myself after school so i suggest you leave before i break your fake nose for the seventh time." I threatened he. Her face looked like she was about to blow up and then i burst out laughing at her. She stormed away which made me laugh that much harder and Edward started laughing too.
"Wanna go dance?" He asked me and then smiled at me.
"I'll do anything as long as i'm with you." I said back and then we walked over to the dancefloor and started swaying to the music. I truly believed i could do anything as long as Edward was by my side and just then his lipscrashed down on mine and he was the one thing that made me feel normal. But hey, i guess i am what i am, i don't want praise and i most deffinately don't want pitty.