Fevered Mind

by MaryRussellgrl

Hurt and in love Sara has become bitter and angry with the one man who denied her happiness.

Grissom dabbed my fevered head as I lay in bed after he brought me home from work. I came to work not feeling well then by the end of shift I collapsed in the lounge. Nick ran to get Grissom in his office. He and Nick then ran back to see Catherine leaning over me. It was decided that he should take me home after a debate on who would be doing it.

Grissom wanted Catherine to take me home, but she had to go with Nick. She smiled at him giving him the keys to my car and house. Groaning, he walked with Nick carrying me to the car. It had been a week since he refused my offer to go to dinner. Since then I had not talked to him nor did I want to.

I moved trying to get away from the cool wet cloth he put on my head. In truth he felt responsible about this sickness. I had given up the will to look after myself and now I was paying the price.

I coughed shaking as my chest burned. He rubbed my back trying to ease the pain I felt. He then made me drink water giving me an aspirin. He sat back rubbing his tired eyes feeling the heat coming from my body.

In the morning he woke up beside me. Lifting his head he saw that sun coming through the blinds on my window. Yawning he sat up looking over at me. My face was shiny with perspiration. I lay on my back breathing in and out faintly He reached over touching my head feeling the coolness. I moved my head slowly as he touched my cheek.

I just wanted to sleep. I could hear and feel someone close to me touching me and breathing. The cologne was familiar to me. I hugged someone with that smell.

Grissom got out of the bed grabbing his phone looking at me as he dialed. I opened my eyes seeing him disappear out of the corner of my eye. My foggy brain could not figure out who was in the house. I swallowed feeling a thirst for water.

A voice in the living room turned my attention to the door. I could hear his shoes moving across the floor. Weakly I moved over seeing a half full glass of water on the bed side table. Pushing myself I reached for it putting my fingers on the glass moving it with my fingers. Grissom hung up when he heard a thump in the bedroom. Coming in he saw me hanging over the bed with a glass on the floor with water spilt.

"Sara?" He said, helping me back on the bed.

"Can I have some water?" I asked

"Of course."

He picked the glass up leaving then returning lifting my head up watching me drink spilling it down my neck. I swallowed as he put the glass on the table watching me.

"Thank you." I said, licking my parched lips closing my eyes.

He sat on the bed looking at me. I opened my eyes looking at him.

"How do you feel?"

"Weak and tired."

"Well you don't have a fever so I think your going to be all right. I should go home and change for work. I will call you to make sure you are all right." He said, getting up leaving quickly.

I closed my eyes wishing he had stayed.

Grissom walked into work seeing Catherine met him at his office.

"How is Sara?" She asked, watching him put his briefcase on his desk.

"She's fine."

"Did you stay with her?"

"Yes, just to make sure she's fine."

Catherine watched him look at the mail then look at her.

"Great." She said

She backed up leaving him. He went back to the mail.

I woke at five to tired to move when I heard my cell phone ringing in the other room. Grissom walked to the crime scene behind Nick as he tried calling.

Grissom tried calling again as he drove to his home. I moved in bed sleeping.

"Come on Sara." He said, dialing again.

I moved again waking hearing the phone. Grissom turned off the road thinking then he turned around coming towards my home. He opened my door not hearing anything.

"Sara?" He called out, walking in the living room. He walked into the bedroom seeing I was still in bed. I looked at him lying on my side.

"Back again?" I asked

"Have you even been out of bed?"

"No."

"You should eat something."

"I am not hungry."

"Sara." He said

I watched him leave only to come back minutes later with a bowl of soup from a can. He sat on the bed and spooned out some broth to my lips. He patiently fed me then he set aside the bowl.

"You need to take care of yourself."

"Why do you care?" I asked

"Sara, I care."

"You've been very nice, but you can go now." I said, moving to my side away from him.

"Sara, if I didn't care I would not be here now."

"You're only being nice to me because you feel guilty."

"No, I am being nice because I actually do genuinely care about my team."

"Your team?"

"Yes, my team is very important to me."

I closed my eyes trying to imagine him gone. He sighed looking at my back.

"Can't we start again?" He asked

"No."

He got up looking at me before leaving. I opened my eyes hearing the front door shut.

I came back to work a day later shuddering as Grissom asked me to work alongside him. I didn't talk or look at him the entire ride there. We stopped outside of the house with the police cars outside. Brass stood at the steps watching us come over.

"Body inside the house."

"Sara take the outside. I'll do the inside." Grissom said, going inside.

I rolled my eyes going down the stairs out to the back yard. I walked around the yard seeing a hole in the fence. I walked over to it trying to slide through. I walked out looking down a very steep hill. Grissom came out looking for me. He heard me yell and he went the way of the sound. Sliding through the hole he saw me down at the bottom trying to get up.

"Sara?" He called

I looked up only to see him slide down making me fall to the ground. I looked at him as he landed on top of me. We stared at each other as the dust settled around us.

"Steep hill." He said

"Yeah."

He got up slowly then helped me up. He let me go getting his flashlight on the ground. He shined it down the hill then up where we came from.

"Ladies first." He said

I sighed trying to climb up the hill I was halfway up when I lost my footing coming down. Grissom caught me falling down the rest of the way. We rolled to a stop this time Grissom was on the bottom.

"This is not getting us anywhere." I said

"I don't know. We are down the hill this time."

"I think this time you should go up first."

A flashlight hit us making us look up seeing Brass standing at the top.

"Hey you two, when you are done why don't you come up and look at something?"

"Be right there." Grissom said

Brass nodded going back into the hole. I looked at Grissom as he looked at me. I watched him climb up helping me up the hill we went through the hole and Brass led us to the side of the house showing us a ladder that was hanging up against the upstairs window.

"That must be how the killer got inside." Brass said

"I'll dust it." I said

"No, I will." Grissom said

I looked at him as he looked at me. In the car ride home I sat back in the seat looking at him. He turned the wheel then he looked at me looking back at the road. We parked at the lab and I walked with the evidence glancing back as he walked over following me.

After work I walked to the locker room seeing Warrick and Nick walking out laughing. They waved at me before leaving. I went in stopping as Grissom was on his way out and I was blocking his path.

"Sorry." I said, moving out of the way.

"That's all right." He said, looking at me then he left. I sat on the bench looking at the door.

Grissom came to the door of his house later yawning as he had just woken up. He opened the door seeing me soaking wet looking at him.

"Sara?"

"Hi." I said, feeling drops of water falling from my hair to my neck.

"Is there something….."

"Can I come in?" I asked, cutting him off.

"Of course."

He opened the door wider letting me in. I shivered breathing out as he closed the door looking at me. I looked down at my wet clothes then at him.

"I'll get you a towel."

"No, I am not staying." I said

He looked at me.

"Grissom, I came to apologize."

"Apologize?"

"Yes, I have been nasty to you and I wanted to say that I am sorry."

"Sara, you didn't have to do that."

"I wanted to. I better go." I said, going to the door.

"Did you walk here?"

I nodded looking back at him.

"Let me drive you home."

"No, that's all right." I said, opening the door going out. He watched the door close then he looked down at the spot I stood at seeing a wet puddle. I stood out in the rain at the bottom of the stairs walking to the curb pulling my wet coat around me better. A car horn blew making me turn around seeing Grissom.

"Sara, get in."

"I am all right." I said

"Sara."

I sighed giving in making my way over to the passenger side getting in. I looked at him as I fastened my seat belt. He drove on turning the heat up as I shivered.

"Why did you walk eight miles in the rain?" He asked

"It wasn't raining when I started."

"You just got over being sick and now your going to be sick again."

"I don't need a lecture."

"This is not a lecture, Sara." He said, looking at me "Although I could give you one."

"Please don't."

I looked out at the rainy streets as he turned down the street my place was on. He parked outside of my place looking at me.

"Thank's." I said

"Will you be all right?"

I looked at him as I reached for the door handle.

"I am always all right." I said, as I opened the door going out to walk up the steps. He watched me a moment till I was out of sight.

At work I walked to trace as Grissom told me he would meet me there after Sophia stopped him at his door. I entered the room waiting for him to arrive. I came out of trace with the results after waiting five minutes. Walking over to his room I saw him talking to Sophia beside his desk. Sophia smiled at him touching his arm as he looked at her.

"Well I see what distracted you." I said

Sophia let him go as she glared at me.

"Sara, I…."

"Don't bother. Here are the results." I said, flinging the paper onto his desk before leaving. He ran out seeing me walking down the hallway.

"Sara."

"Leave me alone." I said, over my shoulder.

He walked past me grabbing my arm pulling me to the locker room. Inside I walked over to the lockers crossing my arms over my chest looking at him as he blocked the door.

"Did I promise something that I am not aware of?" He asked

"No."

"Well then why are you so angry?"

"You told me you would meet me and instead I find you flirting with Sophia."

"I was not flirting, Sara. She had information on the case that is all. I was about to meet you."

"Save it. I can't believe I apologized to you."

"Sara, what is this really about?"

I stayed quiet looking down.

"Are you angry that I am not pining away for you?"

I looked at him walking over to stand in front of him.

"I don't need you to take pity on me, Grissom. In fact if you want to carry on a relationship with Sophia and anyone else in this building I don't care. I don't need this place or you. I am quitting!" I yelled, shoving him away to get out.

I drove home after that with fresh angry tears in my eyes. I slammed my door sliding down to the floor wanting to die. Grissom knocked at my door later. I wore a robe walking over opening the door seeing him.

"May I come in?" He asked

I rolled my eyes leaving the door open as I went to the kitchen. He came in closing the door hearing me moving around. Walking over he saw that I had a sleeping pill bottle on the counter and I was pouring some juice in a glass.

"What do you want?" I asked, as I put the lid on the juice bottle.

"I just came to say I don't want you to quit." He said, as he watched me open the pill bottle pouring them out in my hand then laying them on the counter "What are you doing?"

"Is that all?" I asked

"No, are you going to answer the question?" He asked, looking at the pile of pills then looking at me.

I moved past him opening the front door for him to leave. He walked over taking the door from my grip closing it staring at me.

"Sara, I am scared."

"I am fine."

"Then why all those pills? Your just going to take them and expect me to just look the other way?"

"I am having trouble sleeping."

"Then take two, not twenty."

"Please leave." I said, looking down.

"I am not leaving, Sara."

"Fine." I said, glaring at him going back to the kitchen. He came over watching me. I sipped some juice looking at him. He reached over sliding all the pills to him.

"Sara, I want to talk."

"You want to talk now?"

"Yes, because you are crying out for help and I am here to listen."

"Why would you want to spend your time with me? Don't you have a date with Sophia?"

"No." He said, looking at me concerned.

I set the glass down looking at it.

"Let's sit down on the couch."

"No."

"Okay then let's stand here and talk."

"I don't think we have anything left to say."

"Fine." He said, grabbing the pill bottle opening it as he slid all the pills on the counter in side then he closed it lifting it up to me. "These stay with me."

I sighed as he put them in his pocket turning to walk over to the couch in the living room sitting down. I stared at him then I went into the bedroom closing the door. I changed into my pajamas lying in bed staring at the light outside coming from the window. The door opened gently as Grissom came in seeing me in bed lying on my side away from him. He sat down on the bed just sitting there.

"Do you need to talk to someone?"

I didn't answer.

"Sara?"

"You're the only person that I cared about." I said "The only one I thought cared about me. When you came over to talk to me after the explosion at the lab you said honey. I thought you cared then."

"I do care."

I turned looking at him.

"No, you don't. You care about the team; you care about the lab, the job. You never cared about me."

"I told you I didn't know what to do about this." He said, looking at me with pained eyes.

"You never will know, Grissom. That's the problem."

He looked down as I moved to my side again feeling tears fall down my cheek. I sniffed wiping them away. He looked at me slowly reaching his hand over touching my arm. I turned looking at him. He moved closer pulling me to sit up. I looked at him then down wiping my eyes. He put his arms around me hugging me. I stiffened as his arms wrapped around to my back.

"How can you say I don't care about you?" He said, against me "I care about you more than anyone else. The problem is I can't risk your job or mine."

"You could have just told me that."

"Sara, I am not a people person. Would you be satisfied with that answer?"

I moved back looking at him.

"I would be satisfied, because I would know that it wasn't just because you don't like me."

"I like you Sara. I don't want you to quit."

I looked down feeling his hand rub my arm.

"I wasn't going to kill myself."

"I know, because I would not let you." He said "I need you."

He watched me look at him. Slowly he reached up wiping the tears from my cheeks.

"All right, I will come back."

"Good." He said, standing.

"Can I have my pills back?" I asked, lifting up my hand to him.

"Can I trust you?"

"Yes."

He took them out of his pocket giving the bottle back. I set them on the side table then looked at him.

"I expect you to be at work tomorrow evening on time."

I nodded watching him look at me then leave. Lying back in bed I thought about what just happened. Walking in the lab I saw him standing in the hallway talking to Greg. He looked over at me as I passed then went back to Greg. I leaned over a belt that was around the victim's neck dusting for finger prints. Grissom came in snapping on some gloves walking over to me.

"Found anything?" He asked

"Partial print."

He nodded walking away. I glanced at him before going back to work. I walked into his office later seeing him working at his desk.

"Hey, I am going back to the house." I said

"Why?"

"Something doesn't feel right. I need to go there."

"Want company?"

"Sure."

He got up grabbing his keys. We drove to the house seeing two cops waiting on us in the driveway. They followed us into the house. I walked around looking at everything as Grissom slowly followed. We went outside looking around. I went through the hole looking at the steep hillside. Sliding down as I grabbed the ground I made it down hearing Grissom follow.

"The other night I thought I thought I saw footprints coming down here." I said

"There is nothing around except land."

"Yeah."

"We might as well take a walk." He said, walking past me.

"Your serious?"

"Why not?" He asked, glancing back at me.

I looked up above seeing the police officers at the top.

"We're walking."

They nodded waiting up above.

I caught up with Grissom as he looked down at the ground.

"Look." I said, pointing to a car a little ways from us. It was a beat up blue ford. Grissom looked at me as he walked over. "Interesting spot to have a car."

"It's probably been here for a while."

"You once said that anything out of place should be investigated."

"What did I tell you about recording everything I say?" He asked, looking inside "Do you see anything?"

When I didn't answer he looked up seeing a man holding a gun to my head holding me.

"Get over here." He ordered

"Stay calm." Grissom said, reaching for his gun.

"Throw it away!"

Grissom looked at me as I stayed still looking at him. He lifted his gun and tossed it into the grass.

"Cell phone!"

"Okay."

I watched his cell phone disappear in the weeds.

"Get her gun and cell phone!"

I watched Grissom walk over slowly staring at the man as he got my gun and cell phone throwing them. The man backed me up kicking the trunk open.

"Get in!"

Grissom heard me whimper as the man pulled my arm back painfully. He got in lying down inside. The man pushed me in as well then shut the door. Grissom listened as the engine started and they were being driven somewhere.

"Are you all right?" He asked

"Yes. Now what?"

"I don't know, Can you move?"

"Not very well."

"Me neither."

We hit a bump and Grissom put his arms around me pulling me closer. It seemed like hours that we were in that trunk. I dozed off as Grissom listened to the sounds outside. I moved closer to him feeling his warm body. The car stopped suddenly and the door closed.

"Sara, we have stopped." He said

I moved lifting my head.

"We've stopped?"

"Yes."

Grissom and I listened waiting for the next surprise. The trunk came open and the man looked at us winching from the light.

"Come on." He said, pointing his gun at us. I got out as Grissom did looking around seeing that we were near the lake. "I killed Ryan because he stole money from me."

"Why don't you come to the station and we can talk there?" Grissom asked

"Why so you can take me in and then I go to jail?"

"You killed a man. No matter what he did to you it's still a crime." I said

He walked over to me as Grissom stepped closer watching the man.

"You don't know what I went through. I will not go to jail."

I watched him look over at the water then at me.

"I want you and your partner to go stand by the water now!" He said, pointing his gun.

"No." I said, glaring at him.

Grissom leaned over to me.

"Sara, we don't have an element of surprise without our guns." He whispered.

"I said no!"

The man fumed with rage. He grabbed me harshly as Grissom stepped in to stop him. I got in a punch as the man stumbled back he fell and his gun went off. Grissom heard the echo as he looked over at me. I held my arm lifting my hand to look at the blood. Grissom caught me as I fell to the ground holding my arm.

"I told you I would do something!" The man said, as he stood.

"Give me something to stop the bleeding!" Grissom shouted, as he looked at my arm as blood started to form a stain on my shirt. The man looked at us then he ran to the car starting it driving off in a dust.

I breathed in and out looking at my arm. Grissom took his coat off putting pressure on the wound.

"Now what?" I asked

He looked around trying to think of a plan. He laid me back on the ground taking his coat away ripping my sleeve to look at the wound.

"How bad is it?"

"Look's like the bullet nicked you."

"Good." I said, looking up at the lightened sky.

He put the pressure back on the wound. His hand went to my cheek as he rubbed it.

"Can you walk?"

"Do we have any other choice?"

"No."

"Then I can walk."

He helped me up and we walked back the way we came from. There was nothing around to call for someone. Grissom looked at me as I held his coat to my arm. We found a payphone and Grissom let Brass know where we were.

I sat down as he hung up looking at my arm. He knelt down looking at it.

"Well I guess we wait." He said, sitting beside me.

"I suppose I saved the day." I said

"Sara that was a silly thing to do."

"It worked. We are alive."

"Just don't do it again. I think one fright for the day is enough."

I sighed winching some. He looked at the ground as we waited. We heard sirens then saw Brass with Catherine behind a few cop cars driving up. Everyone looked relieved to see us. Grissom ordered me to a hospital as he and Catherine went to work with Brass to find the killer.

I came back after getting my arm stitched with a bandage around the wound. Grissom walked to interrogation with Brass when he saw me.

"Did you go to the hospital?"

"Yes." I said, waving at Brass.

"I want you to go home and rest." He said

"What about interrogating the jerk?"

"Sara, I can handle it now go."

Sticking my tongue out at his back I walked away.

The next evening I walked into his office sitting in a chair. He came in seeing me. He closed the door then walked to his desk laying a stack of papers down on the desk before facing me.

"How did it go?"

"We got him."

"Good, now what?"

"You need to be on call tonight."

I groaned as I stood up.

"All right."

"You can help me with paper work."

"That sounds fun."

"I detect the humor." He said, looking over at the papers he carried in.

"Grissom, to be honest working in a confined space with my boss on paperwork he should have done a month ago does not exactly sound exciting."

"You can do this or you can work in the morgue with Doc. Robbins. They have a body turned into soup."

"I'll do paperwork."

He nodded smiling faintly.

He passed me a form he signed and I placed it with the others in a neat pile. I sighed looking around the room bored. Grissom shook his head signing his name to another letter.

"There is another reason I asked you to work with me tonight." He said, passing me another paper.

"Why?"

"To be with you." He said, watching me look at him in surprise.

"Did you just say that?"

"Yes, is that a problem?"

"No, I just thought I imagined it." I said, looking down.

He moved his seat turning it putting his hand on my chin. I looked at him as he leaned in kissing me. His lips moved slowly over mine as his hands held my face. He moved his head back looking at me. I took a breath looking at his lips then his eyes.

"Is that a problem?"

I slowly shook my head looking at his lips. He pulled me back kissing me moving his chair closer. When I left after my shift I could not stop thinking about our make out session behind the desk. His lips were so warm and soft. I didn't think he knew how to kiss a woman.

I stayed awake because my brain went over it again and again. We were talking and then it happened. Wanting to believe that maybe his heart was opening up I still had doubts. If he hurt me again I knew I would not bounce back.

The next shift I stood in the lounge getting some coffee for my sleep deprived body. Nick came in with Grissom talking about a past case. I walked over to the couch not looking at them as they went to get some coffee. Grissom nodded at Nick looking over at me. Nick waved at me as he walked out. I sipped from the cup noticing Grissom walking over holding a cup.

"You look tired."

"I couldn't sleep."

He nodded understanding.

"Sara, I want you to know that I appreciated you helping me with the paperwork."

"Your welcome. I enjoyed the last bit."

He smiled then he walked out.

Nick asked me to help him on his case all shift and I didn't see Grissom. Nick and I walked down the hall ready to leave as I saw Sophia and Grissom walk out of his office.

"Hey Grissom." Nick called

I walked slowly over to them as they both looked at Nick and I.

"Where are you two off to?" Nick asked

Grissom looked at me then at Nick.

"I am going back to the police and Grissom is taking me out to eat." Sophia said

"Dinner?" I asked, seeing Grissom look at me.

"To wish her luck." He said

"That sound's fun. Sara, do you want to have dinner?" Nick asked

"I have a better idea. Let's go out drinking." I said, seeing Grissom looking at me as we walked past. I looked at him then walked out with Nick. We drank as we visited numerous places on the strip. Nick only had one beer while I drank more than the limit. He drove me home parking outside looking over at me past out against his car window. Sighing he got out coming over to my side opening the door getting me out. I slumped over to him as he picked me up shutting the door walking past the car to the stairs. Stopping at the first floor he looked at the second floor stairs. He turned hearing someone coming up the stairs behind him. Grissom made his way up seeing Nick with me in his arms.

"Hey, Gris."

"Hello, what are you doing?"

"Trying to get Sara to her place. She passed out in the car. I don't have a key."

"I do, let's go." Grissom said, going up. Nick followed him up to my door. Grissom unlocked it and Nick walked in looking around.

"Bedroom?"

"In there."

Nick walked through the open door to my bed. He deposited me then he moved some of my hair from my face. He stood looking at me then he turned seeing Grissom standing at the doorway.

"Grissom man, I have never seen her put that much alcohol away in my entire time I knew her."

"I will talk to her when she wakes up. You better go get some sleep."

"Good idea."

Grissom listened as the door shut then he looked at me lying still on the bed. I jumped awake as I heard someone stirring a spoon in a glass next to the bed. Grabbing my head I moved to the side grabbing a pillow to hide under. The glass was put down on the bedside table then I felt the mattress go down and my pillow being taken away.

I groaned as the light from the window blinded me. I was pulled to lie on my back. Feeling sick I leaned over the side throwing up in a bucket by the bed. Grissom rubbed my back listening to me. I laid back breathing fast as he looked at me.

"I feel terrible." I said

"I imagine you do. I made you a cure for a hangover."

"I am not drinking again."

"Try it." He said, lifting the glass to my lips as he lifted my head. I sipped it winching then drank some more. I laid back looking around the room.

"How did I get here?"

"Nick brought you."

"Can you close the blinds?" I asked, holding my arm over my eyes.

He got up closing them seeing me relax. I moved my arm looking at him as he sat down on the bed once more.

"How was your date?"

"It was not a date. It was just a dinner."

I reached over to take the glass of mystery ingredients he had me drink before. I sat up drinking it as I looked at him. He watched drink till the last drop I winched as I gave him the empty glass, He put it back on the table.

I laid back in bed pulling the covers around me.

"You and Sophia look good together. You should date her."

"I don't think of her like that."

"You used to."

"Sara, I have only been interested in you. I still am."

"Will you stay? "I asked

"Let me call Catherine." He said, getting up to call. I moved to my side hearing him talking in the next room. He came back in getting in the bed. I pulled the covers up around him and he laid down putting his arms around me. I turned cocooning myself in his chest.

I woke feeling him move then settle down holding me tighter. I opened my eyes to darkness. I felt his breathing against my head. I touched his hand against my stomach. He moved his head kissing my head.

"Sara." He said, against my hair.

I moved facing him kissing him. He pulled me closer trying to keep up with the passion. Later I woke to light outside feeling his bare skin against my bare back. I slowly untangled myself from him then got up. My head hurt some as I put my pajamas on going to the kitchen to make breakfast. Grissom moved smelling something coming from the kitchen. He pulled on his clothes making his way out to the living room seeing me cooking some eggs. I sighed stirring them around the skillet not hearing him coming over. I jumped as he touched my arms kissing my neck.

"I made breakfast." I said

"I should get home. We have work to do."

I turned kissing him. He moved back looking over my face.

"Does this mean you won't have any more dinners with Sophia?" I asked

"The only one I want to eat with is you."

"See you at work."

"Be on time." He said, letting me go to leave.

I smiled watching him go then it slowly faded as he left. I walked in the hallway waving at Nick down the hall. Catherine handed me a folder to help her on a case. We entered the interrogation to talk to a man sitting at the table. Grissom was walking down the hallway when Catherine caught him as she exited the room.

"Gil, did you get a look at the beetle?"

"Yes."

"And?" She asked

They heard a commotion in the interrogation room. Catherine ran in with Grissom seeing the man holding me on the table with his hands around my neck.

"Get off her now!" Catherine shouted, holding her gun at him. Grissom ran over shoving the guy back against the wall. Catherine did a double take as he used force to shove the man against the wall standing between me and the man. I got up holding my neck. The man watched Catherine and I leave the room as Brass and some officers came running.

"Are you okay?" Catherine asked me as we stood outside.

"Yeah." I said

The man came out in cuffs with some cops pushing him past us. Brass came out with Grissom looking at us.

"What happened?" He asked, looking at me.

"I was talking to him and he just grabbed me pushing onto the table." I said

He moved my hands looking at my neck.

"Well I think we are done. Thank you Sara." Catherine said, leaving us to walk down the hall.

"Anytime." I said, watching her leave.

Grissom touched my arm pulling me the opposite direction. I went with him to his office. He shut the door pulling me to him kissing me. I moved back as he moved my head to look at my neck.

"I am fine." I said

"I just wanted to see."

He touched my cheek. I put my head on his shoulder as he hugged me. A knock at the door made us jump apart. Sophia opened the door looking at us.

"Gil, can you come to the station?"

"Yes, just a minute." He said, watching her nod before closing the door.

I moved closer kissing him. He touched my face then walked to the door.

"Shift is over. Go home."

"Will you come?"

He nodded.

Grissom came in the apartment hearing loud music from my stereo. He walked over shutting it off seeing me run out in a towel seeing him.

"Hey."

"You always listen to music this loud?"

"I was taking a bath."

"Sara, I can't stay."

"Why?" I asked, walking over to him. He looked at my skin gleaming and then the purple towel wrapped around my body.

"Sophia called me while I was on my way here. There is a body in a barrel."

"Oh, can't day shift take over?"

"Shorthanded." He said, kissing me quickly before leaving.

I came into work walking over to the door. I heard someone talking that sounded like Grissom. Walking over to the cars on the left I went over slowly. Sophia pulled him to her kissing him putting her arms around him. I gasped making them turn looking at me.

"Sara?" Grissom called, letting Sophia go.

I shook my head backing up. He walked over quickly.

"Sara, I can explain."

"How could you?" I said "I thought you loved me?"

"I do love you."

"I can't deal with this." I said, running inside. I ran to the locker room going to the back where the showers were crying. My heart ached as I pounded on the wall.

Grissom watched me run into the building. He turned looking at Sophia then he walked over to the front door.

"Nick, have you seen Sara?" He asked, as he looked around the lounge.

"No." Nick said, as he drank from a cup with coffee inside.

Grissom went all around going to the locker room not seeing me in there either. He heard a shower running walking over he went around the corner seeing the last stall shower working.

"Sara?" He said, slowly making his way over he saw me under the spray holding myself under cold water shivering. He turned the water off kneeling down to me. "Sara, what are you doing?"

"I….am trying to get your handprints off me."

"Honey." He said, as he moved closer

"No!" I said, moving to stand "Don't ever call me that again!"

He stood seeing how wounded I was.

"Can we talk?"

"No, I am moving to day shift."

"Sara, please."

"I am moving. You can be with her." I said, going past him.

Grissom reluctantly signed my release from night shift. I thought day shift would give me space from Grissom.

A month later I walked down the hallway seeing Grissom in early talking to my day shift supervisor Peterson. Stopping I turned going the other way when I heard Peterson call me back. Turning, I saw both men looking at me.

"Sara, come here." Peterson said, motioning with his arms.

I groaned walking over trying to avoid Grissom's stare.

"Grissom wanted to know if you want to transfer back."

"No."

"You got your answer, Gil."

Grissom nodded looking at me. I looked down the entire time.

"All right." He said

"I am headed home unless there is something else." I said, looking at Peterson.

"Have a good sleep." He said

I nodded walking past. At home I laid on my couch looking at the ceiling thinking about him. I wanted to run to him, but then that day I saw him kissing her came up.

My hand was bandaged the next week after I cut it at a crime scene. Grissom came out of his office as he had come in early again looking at me as I walked down the hall.

"Sara?" He called

I stopped wanting to keep going. Glancing back I saw him raise his finger motioning me to his office. Turning I walked over standing just outside of it looking in at him sitting at his desk.

"You can come in."

"I am fine." I said

"I heard you got hurt the other day. Are you all right?"

"Fine."

"I am glad to hear it."

"Can I go?"

"Yes." He said, looking at me. I turned leaving to walk down the hall.

I noticed a few days later that my hand was sore, but I ignored it as I worked sorting through garbage. After shift I walked out with the day shift crew saying goodnight. Walking to my car I stopped feeling dizzy. A door shut from a car as Grissom came over seeing me on the sidewalk.

"Hey Sara." He said, walking over slowly.

"What do you want?" I asked, rather harshly as I turned around looking at him.

"Nothing, I just wanted to say hi." He said

He noticed that my face was sweaty and I had gone pale.

"Are you all right?"

"Stop this! You're only being nice to me because you feel sorry for me." I said, turning going to my car.

"No, I am not. I was asking because you look sick."

"Just go away." I said, dropping my keys on the ground. I reached down to get them, but he beat me to them. He looked down at the dirty bandage around my hand.

"Sara, have you been keeping that clean?"

"Leave me alone." I said, grabbing the keys. He grabbed my hand as I struggled.

"This might be infected." He said

I stopped struggling as he unwrapped the bandage looking at the wound. He then looked at me.

"This is infected."

"No, it's not!"

"Sara, I know when wounds are infected. You are going to the hospital now."

"I am going home!"

"No, you are not!" He yelled, taking me by the arm pulling me to his car. In the hospital I was put in a room and told that because of the wound I had to stay there. Grissom came in as I laid down on the bed sleeping. He smoothed my hair leaning over kissing my head.

I woke to the doctor checking my hand. Ignoring his looks in my direction as he probed the cut. I went to sleep again moving my head as I felt someone kissing my head.

"Whose there?" I asked, not opening my eyes.

"Me."

"Me?"

"Grissom."

"I thought it was someone good." I said, moving my head to the side.

"Sara, what can I do to make this better?"

"Nothing, we are through."

"I can't do that."

"Try." I said, sighing.

He looked down then at me.

"Sara, I love you."

I opened my eyes moving my head looking at him.

"I love you more than my job. I know I hurt you, but I can't say goodbye."

"What if I don't want you?"

"Then I will accept it and leave you alone."

I stared at him as he looked at me. My heart told me to tell him to get lost, but the truth was I loved him still. I reached over with my good hand touching his.

"I love you to."

He leaned over kissing me then smoothing his cheek against my face. I closed my eyes enjoying his touch. Grissom sat close to the bed after that smoothing my warm forehead while I slept.

I woke seeing him reading beside my bedside. He was so engrossed he didn't notice me moving.

"Gris?" I called to him

He shut the book putting it on the side of the chair touching my head again.

"What time is it?"

"About 9." He said, looking at his watch "Do you need something?"

"No."

He relaxed looking around then at me.

"Don't you have to work?" I asked

"Tired of me?" He asked, smiling faintly.

"Never, I just don't want to mess up your work."

"I told Catherine I would be in late."

"Go on, I will be fine."

"Now you are trying to get rid of me." He said, reaching down grabbing his book.

He kissed me then walked to the door looking at me.

"Later." I said

"Later." He said, nodding.

I watched him go feeling in love again, but something bothered me and I could not pin point what.