Chapter One

A stray strand of golden brown hair slipped out from behind her ear as she took a sharp intake of breath. The tension between them grew thicker with each second that she didn't reply. Shock and disbelief were completely evident in her eyes, but to Ron it was the good kind of shock. Meanwhile, her face was as still as stone, mouth agape and her gaze locked on his. Hermione wanted more than ever to give him an answer. No, that wasn't necessarily true. She wanted him to get up off of his knee and stop looking at her with so much hope that she could say yes. The longer he stayed down there, the guiltier she felt about what she was going to say. There was no question in her mind that she would reject him. The only problem was getting the "no" out of her mouth.

She should have known better than to agree to let him come here alone, in retrospect. It was so obvious what was coming and she'd been warned by his behavior in the weeks prior to this moment. Still, there was only one sentence consistently flowing throughout her mind: He cannot be serious.

This was probably one of the worst moments in her entire romantic lifetime. It was worse than the Yule Ball disaster, worse than being humiliated by Rita Skeeter... and although she was still young, she was sure that this would take the cake. The very instant he pulled the ring box out was the moment she heard his fragile heart break. It was such a shame, and a very nice ring too. The box was violet, encrusted with a green vine design around the corners. Regardless, never before in her life had she been made to be the villain — oh, the agony she felt when thinking of their friends and his family! — it crushed her to even look at him.

Hermione stopped her internal pity party to ponder the future. Would she still be invited to the Weasley Sunday dinners after this night? Would she ever be welcome in their home again if she turned him down of his proposal. A small tear escaped her eye as she thought of the laughter filled memories while in the good company of her loved ones — his loved ones.

I really hope they don't push me out as an outcast. They wouldn't do that... would they? Our romantic affairs really have nothing to do with them. Molly might be a little hurt, but honestly I can't see — or rather, I truly hope...

It was all too much. Her heart wrenched with sorrow and she suddenly couldn't think straight. Before she could stop it, a light cough left her throat and it pushed him to speak. She wasn't ready for him to start the spiel.

"Before you say anything," he started with an awkward grin. "I want you to know that I know I've messed up a lot. I know I don't do the right thing and I'm sure I'll disappoint you every now and then. But try to remember that I'll always try to make it up to you. Think of how happy we could be together."

Here he goes… Please stop talking, she thought. You're only going to make this harder for me.

"I know I don't always show it 'Mione but I love you and," he cleared his throat and his ears reddened deeply. "You're the only one for me. We argue plenty but I'm willing to make up for it and try to please you however I can. However often I mess up, I'll be there for you tenfold. I want a build a family with you, I want to buy a house with you and spend all day just being with you, 'Mione." He gave her a look that made her want to break into the ministry for a time turner, simply so she could prevent him from getting into her apartment. "So marry me?"

There he goes again... Can he not tell by my silence that I mean to say no?

"Uh… 'Mione?" He had finally caught on that something was wrong. "Are you…"

Please just stop. "Stop," she managed in a whisper.

"What?" He said quizzically.

"Please stop calling me that." Her voice was a little louder this time."Stop calling me that horrendous nickname! I'm sure you don't know, because you never listen to me anyway, but I'm not at all fond of it." She paused to regain the strength she needed to do this. "My name is Hermione. So unless you meant to propose to some other girl in the room — well, you can't have been talking to me." That sounded harsher aloud than it had in her head."How can you say all those things to me? How can you even think I'd want something like that with you?" Well, if he wasn't going to hate me for saying no, he's definitely going to hate me now...

He stood up quicker than she saw and immediately began to defend himself. "What's that? Is marrying me such an awful idea? Think you're too good for me now, do you? After all we've been through and all these years we've been together?"

Her dry chuckle set him back off his rant and sent fear through his bloodstream. "The years we've spent together, Ronald? We've been dating for less than six months and all the speculation of our relationship in The Daily Prophet was the half of it. I shouldn't have let you kiss me back then at Hogwarts," she said a little bitterly. "We were in the middle of battle, and I know I shouldn't go blaming it on the heat of the moment because you truly were very brave to defend me and in the way you fought for everyone's safety, but that kiss was the end of a crush that formed a long time ago. I haven't felt that way about you in a while; I've grown up!" This proposal woke her up. She paused but he was probably too scared to say anything back to her. Her tone was something short of malicious. He could feel the contempt she felt from across the room.

"I spent the majority of our time at Hogwarts after third year begging you to notice me. It took you even longer to have you consider me a friend. What's your excuse for how mean you were? Or better yet, what was your badly placed jealousy about? Which, by the way, pretty much ruined any chance I had at being happy with someone else. The only time you made me feel welcome amongst you and Harry was when I was helping you do your homework. Even that you left me to do by myself. One kiss we shared at the very end of our days at school... and you just have to propose? One kiss and you think we're meant to be? You think we could make an honest and long lasting union if we were married? Ron, we fight over everything and our opinions almost always differ. It's been like that since the moment we met! Forget the proposal for a second. We barely make a good team for representation on anything. How could we properly represent a happy couple or a proper parental team for children? But you already know that don't you? " She couldn't stop herself now. It was too much knowing she had all this power of confession and not using it. "From day one, you made me feel like an outcast only to take advantage of me when you made a mess and you needed me to clean it up. I'm not stupid, Ron. I know you've grown up since then and you're a different person, but we're both different people. We're different people who still can't find a load of common ground outside of Harry."

Scoffing harshly, he closed the box and shoved it in his pocket. The wind from his quick departure slapped her in the face. Before he could slam the door to her flat he looked her dead in the eye and scoffed again. "You're right," he said in a raspy whisper. "We were never meant to be together and it was only because of Harry that we were barely friends. I won't bother you again."

The breeze from the door shutting hit her again and she fell back onto the couch in her living room with a plop. Oh. That was much easier than I thought it would be.

She gripped the throw pillows beside her and lowered her head. The tears let themselves out and she didn't stop them.

Years of pent up aggression from his attitude caused her to blow up like that. She had meant to let him down easy but couldn't hold back after all the borderline sewage that came from his mouth. In truth she'd been jealous of his simplistic thought process. He didn't have to think about the consequences of his actions until much later.

How I envy him so.

It had been easy to shout at him when he'd cornered her into a proposal like that. She never had been good at making tough decisions under pressure anyway.

Hermione wiped the last of her tears and sluggishly made her way to the bedroom, each step she took like a giant pang to her head. Without shedding any clothes or even getting under the sheets, she drifted away into a dreamless sleep and hoped that this whole thing would blow over very, very quickly.