Shepard. Her image bloomed perennially with blood spatters and beauty in his mind. There was grace in her steady gaze as she took aim; In the slick gathering of power as she slammed enemies with a biotic shockwave.
He remembered the details. The nicks in her armor and the childish laughter like static ringing in his ears. The maniacal way she handled the Mako. It had all coalesced to become this fantastic creature known to him as Shepard. There was a deep rooted admiration for her in him. She was his "immovable center" as Chakwas was so fond of saying. Of course, he would never tell Shepard this himself. Of course, it was too late to tell Shepard anything.
"Hey, Garrus. Got a minute?" She leaned on a table across from where he sat. She grinned with blunted white teeth when she noticed the dismantled rifle that he was cleaning in his lap. Humans had the strangest physical features and their faces were always moving but he had gotten better at reading them. Actually spending time with squishy species taught him a lot more than the training vids at C-Sec had. He could see the slight strain in the crinkles of her eyes. There was a small tremor running through her pale, too soft fingers, when she pulled them through the shifting ink of her hair. "Don't you ever get tired of doing that?"
"Anything for you Shepard. And no, I never get tired of it." He replied in his flanged voice while delicately setting the pieces of the gun down on the table behind her.
"It must be a Turian thing." She turned around and picked up a scope mod designed to allow him to see throw smoke.
"Is there something wrong, Commander?" He asked her. She was behaving strangely. The matted fringe above her eyes, he believed they were called lashes, were damp with a liquid he had learned to associate with sadness or strong emotions in humans when he worked at C-Sec.
"No." She bit her lightly glossed lip, "Um, yes. I don't suppose giving relationship advice is also a Turian thing?" A blush decorated her cheeks and her hands clenched around the scope. All the brutality of battle was nowhere to be seen in the Shepard that stood before him now.
"Ah." His mandibles parted slightly in shock. A Commander asking a subordinate for relationship advice, would never happen on a Turian ship, the strict hierarchy wouldn't allow it. Then again, following the strict hierarchy had never been something he was good at and at times Shepard seemed more like a friend than a commander.
"God, I'm sorry. This is totally inappropriate, isn't it? Let's just forget this ever happened. It's just, it wouldn't be fair to ask Liara knowing how she feels, and I don't think Krograns even have relationships like humans do so that ruled out Wrex, and Tali, well Tali is still just a kid, ya know?" She set the scope down suddenly.
"So, that left the roguishly handsome Turian." He waved away her apologies. "I'm not known for long lasting relationships. There isn't much room for romance on Turian battleships but, I'll listen." He moved to lean beside her but she had already pushed away from the table and started to silently pace.
"It's about Kaidan." The corners of her full mouth turned downwards and impetuous wells gathered in her eyes.
"I assumed." He folded his arms in front of his chest. Seeing Shepard like this was… Disturbing to say the least. Where was all the gunmetal and flame? The electric light of her eyes was gone replaced by something a lot more fragile. It was unsettling and he almost envied Kaidan's ability to create that vulnerability in her.
"We had a fight. About Virmire. Um…" She took a shaky breath, "Wow. I'm just no good at this emotional stuff. He… He blames me for Ashley and… And I don't know how to fix it. He said that he wishes we hadn't… you know." A sigh escaped from her parted lips and she wiped beneath her eyes with the padded heel of her hand.
"Kaidan is a fool. He feels guilty about what happened and it's easier to blame you than himself. You thought that Ashley would make it. We all did." The liquid overwhelmed her lids and spilled out, "This is not something you can fix for Kaidan. So instead of worrying about him, why don't we go out and shoot things? Just like old times and an easy way to cheer you up." She laughed low and soft. Garrus could understand why Kaidan was acting the way he was but that didn't mean he liked it. Shepard always did the best she could with the situation she was handed and she had been handed a lot of hard situations. "Let me just get this rifle back in working condition and we'll hit up Omega. No shortage of criminals there."
"I'll see you in the airlock." She smiled at him and paused at the doorway, "You know, someone really should clean that planet up."