Donald...what to say about Donald? Kinda cute, without actually ever being drop dead gorgeous. A bit thick, strong, tall...army with a capital A.
Hawkeye...what about Hawkeye? Really cute - dreamy. Definitely smart – he'd have to be. Tall, but quite thin...so thin he looks sick...but that's just the crappy food here.

What do either of them have in common with me? Stuck in Korea. There has to be something else?
Donald – regular army. Hawkeye – works in medicine.
Donald – High in authority. Hawkeye – Doesn't care, treats everyone the same
Donald - married. Hawkeye...

Remember what BJ said – just talk to her. Tell her the truth...and hope she won't shoot you. Margaret as a friend? Nice, peaceful, easier to share things with.
Margaret as...more than that? EXTREMELY nice...wonderful, brilliant, magnificent. Not as peaceful...but you get a lot more out of it. Okay...here goes.

knock

"Who is it?"
Just take it easy and tell her the truth. "Don't call the police I just wanna talk."
Hawkeye...settle Mags "Hurry up, don't let anyone see you"
Don't think...you'll change your mind a million times and still upset her...probably. "Nobody saw."
Don't make a scene; just let him tell you what he wants to say. "You can't hang around my door like this – you want people to talk?" Damn it!
Just cool and calm and don't scare her! "I wouldn't care, and nor should you...Margaret I came to level with you." Oh good going Hawk...
Huh? "What do you mean I shouldn't care?"
Ah screw it! "You basically told me last night that you and Donald are finished."
What! "I said nothing of the sort!" Did I?
Yes you did..."Margaret – WAKE UP TO yourself. Donald never loved you. If he did, then why is he running around with other women?" idiot idiot IDIOT!
"He's lonely...and he does love me for your information." HA...yeah right!
Can't you see what he's doing to you? "BJ's lonely, yet I don't see him running around with every female he sees. And what was it...sturdy he called you? I don't see one gorgeous or caring or beautiful in that letter." Why don't I just take a stroll up to the front?

He's right. It's true...Donald and his little whores "Hawkeye what am I supposed to do?"
Simple..."Leave him."
No! "But that's not who I want to be!"
Who be? "What's not?"
You figure it..."Hotlips. Can't keep a man for more than 5 minutes."
"Margaret...it's him that can't keep a woman for 5 minutes, not you. Listen to me...if not as a lover then as a friend." GEEZ! I shouldn't have said that..."He doesn't deserve you. He's an asshole who cheated on his wife numerous times and now has to face the consequences of that. Do you really want to go through life knowing what he's doing? Bringing up his kids in that environment? No. I know you Margaret. You wouldn't let that happen. You won't let that bastard destroy your life because of what a few idiots who know nothing may think." There...
He's right..."You're right...of course you're right. I have to leave him." Yeah...
Of course I'm right? "Then how come you're not convincing me?"
Just tell him..."Because I don't want to be left alone."
Oh geez..."Margaret, you won't be. Sit down."
I won't? "Yes?"
Just breathe and spill it..."This is going to sound really selfish and pig-headed and I don't care – you need to hear it. There's another reason why you need to leave Donald. There's another motive for me wanting you to leave him."
Yeah right..."What is it? You have a bet or something?"
WHAT? "God no! Margaret...when you broke it off with Frank and became engaged, I saw more of that fun-loving side that you try to hide so much. I saw more of Margaret Houlihan – the gorgeous woman inside that hard, Major exterior. During these past few months, I began to realise what a beautiful person you really are...and I began to fall in love with you. Please Margaret don't kick me out, I need to tell you this. I know I'm not the ideal soldier that Donald or even Frank at times was...I never tried to be and I don't claim nor want to be. And when you told me the first time he cheated...and what you told me last night, my blood began to boil, and my suspicions were true."
Pardon? "Suspicions?"
Just go for it..."That Donald wanted you as a trophy and hostess and nothing else. Please Margaret...if you won't do it for me...do it for yourself."
But what if I want to do it for you...okay..."Hawkeye, you already convinced me to leave him...this just sets it in concrete."
Why won't you just...huh...what? "Concrete? Sets what? Margaret, I'm not sure what you're talking about."
Just say it Mags..."I can't be in love with one guy and be with another at the same time."
Excuse me? "What?" Okay...heart racing...PLEASE don't have a stroke...

I gotta stand up..."I'm not sure when it started...maybe when you and Trapper got me drunk those few times, but I also began to see through you. Through your prankster and childish behaviour. Through your lack of respect for the army and everything to do with it and also your crudity. Through all that I saw a magnificent and brilliant surgeon, a caring man and a gorgeous human being. I too began to fall in love. I didn't realise until it was too late that it was not with the man I married." Well...that's it
Oh my..."Are you saying...?"
"I love you Hawkeye." There...I said it
"Hmmm...confusing, without being all together straight forward." Okay then...WHAT THE HELL comes to mind...
Please don't..."It looks black and white to me"
"As long as it's not green and brown." STUPID STUPID MOVE!
Great...a joke...I'M TRYING TO BE SERIOUS HERE! "Well?"
Well..."I don't know. I didn't expect...this. I thought you'd blow me off." Like before...LOTS of times before.
Blow you off...what...when? "Why would I do that?"
THINK MARGARET! "Because you're Margaret Houlihan, I'm Hawkeye Pierce – sworn enemies."
How long have you had this delusion? "Since when did you come up with that analogy?"
Look at you...look at ME...LOOK AT LAST NIGHT! "Since I first came and you told me to basically go jump."
WHAT? "Like hell!"
Oh please don't tell me she doesn't remember! "Think back..."

"Hey Trapp, you were right...this is a shitbox."
"And you settled for hell."
"What's the difference?"
"Nurses"
"Ah, right."
"Captain Pierce, Captain McIntyre?"
"Who?"
"I think he means us...the captain bit's not familiar."
"I'm Corporal O'Reilly, company clerk. This way to Colonel Blake's office."
"Colonel?"
"Corporal?"
"Hey Trapp...I think we're in the army!"
"Captain's Pierce and McIntyre sir."
"Captains"
"Oh yeah – that's us..."
"If you don't mind uh...Colonel - Hawkeye"
"Trapper"
"Henry..."
"Hello gorgeous. I don't know your name but I think I'm in love."
"Make that a double."
"Major Margaret Houlihan, head nurse. You two do have your papers? Oh sorry Colonel."
"Yeah, the papers."
"Papers, papers..."
"You see any papers Hawk?"
"Not since Honolulu."
"Check your pockets...I'd do it, but I'm afraid of what lurks beneath."
"I know! We threw them in your case!"
"Oh yeah. Two official looking papers."
"I do hope there won't be any tom foolery around?"
"That all depends on you Major."
"I beg your pardon!"
"I didn't see you do anything wrong, Hawk?"
"If she accepts my proposal then no."
"Captain Pierce!"
"Yes darling?"
"You are an officer in the US army..."
"Only by force...and the fact that I can't stand Canadian weather."
"You live in Maine...you can't get much closer to Canada without being in it."
"Excuse me!"
"You're excused."
"COLONEL!"
"Aw come on, knock it off!"
"As I was saying, because you are in the army, by choice or not, you have a duty to uphold the traditions that this country has followed for centuries. That includes..."
"Look Florence...or Attila – whichever you prefer. I don't give a damn about army traditions...in fact I really don't give a damn about the army. I'm stuck here for the next God knows how long and whilst here, I'll do what I do best – surgery. I'll do that to the best of my ability but nothing else. I'm not a west pointer and I'm damn well not gonna start acting like one. If you have a probably with that – tell it to someone who gives a damn! Because it certainly isn't me!"
"Colonel Blake!"
"Now look Major – he said he's gonna wok, what more do you want? Would you rather a salute, or 20 men alive?"
"Pick one Major..."
"I'll see you LATER!"
"I take it that's a no?"
"MORE than a no!"
"Fiery one she is."
"Tell me about it..."
"Cute as hell...we just gotta get that GI crap out of her..."
"Good luck...she's got herself a fellow patriot."

Well..."Am I right?"
Oh please...grow up! "So? We've all done some growing since then."
Don't be an idiot..."How can you go from despising me to all of a sudden being in love with me?" good move...
Well it's pretty obvious to me Hawk..."I don't know about you, but this is my first war believe it or not. You ever heard of shock?"
True..."I see your point."
Well good..."Thank you."
Nice...awkward silence...wonderful! "So uh...what now?" Great!
WILL YOU STOP PACING! "First – sit down, you're making me nervous."
Don't freak her out whatever you do! "I mean...do we act on this or?"
Just say it Mags..."Well...I...I mean...do..." DAMMIT!
It's okay...take her hands to help her think..."Margaret, whatever it is you're trying to say...just say it...I won't hold it against you." Oh good...she's letting me
Okay...just breathe Mags...he won't kill you for it...he wants to know so say it.
"Margaret?"
"I need to know if you feel the same way or not." Please don't run away!
"OF COURSE I DO! What do you think the past year and a half meant?"
Year and a half? "Then what the hell was this morning?"
"THAT was keeping you where you should be...at arms length." Don't blow up!
What the hell? "Oh...so you love me but don't want to be with me? How in the hell is that logical?"
"You're married! I don't sleep with married women" Oh you know what I mean! "Usually."
Wonderful "Oh so last night was..."
"Exactly the same thing it was to you. Neither of us knew if we were gonna make it out of there alive or not. Last night could have been the last chance we..."
"...Yes thank you I know what you mean...I don't want you to say it though." Isn't there enough death around here?
"That...and fear I guess. Look sit down...now you're making me nervous." Please? "I repeat my question do we...I mean...what now?"
"Would you want to...after everything?" PLEASE HAWKEYE?
"You mean this morning? Of course I do Margaret...haven't I convinced you of that?" PLEASE MARGARET?
"I mean...I'm a lot of trouble..."
"I like a challenge..."
"I'm insecure..."
"I'm a doctor..."
"I have a temper like a dragon..."
"Then I'm your knight in shining armour, to slay that dragon and save the maiden..."
I have to laugh "Oh now that is bad!"
"There's my bad sense of humour..."
"I like baaaaad things..."
"I'm a total slob"
"I don't mind a bit of mess for you..."
"I'm never serious..."
"So...I'm never funny"
"That's not true"
"I can say the same for you"
"But..."
"We have nothing in common."
"Well...call it opposites attract...besides, we love each other...that's something?"
"It's more than something..."
"Shall we at least try?"
"Yes." Oh keep doing that and you'll have a VERY happy major! "Oh...I definitely think I can live with doing this..."
"Well Major...I think I'll have to agree with you there."
"You think?"
"Figure of speech." Hawkeye said smiling, moving down her neck.
"MmmmHmmm...oh I'd better be getting more than just a kiss out of this!"
"You and me both!"

So Hawkeye and Margaret spent the next 5 hours...'signing their contract.'

'Wow', Margaret thought. "Wow!"
'Uh huh' Hawkeye thought. "Uh huh..."
"We should have done this sooner."
Hawkeye laughed. "Can't argue with you there, Margaret." He rolled onto his side and caressed her cheek. "Have I ever told you how beautiful you are?"
"I think you mentioned something about being magnificent once?" Margaret joked.
"That I meant...every word," he said sincerely.
"And not just my backside?"
"Whilst that is VERY magnificent...I think...I may have to check again."
Margaret rolls her eyes and giggles at him while he does as such. "Well?"
"Magnificent!" he said with a kiss.
"You were saying something before that?" Margaret asked, knowing very well what it was.
Between kisses, Hawkeye declared, "That...you...Margaret...are...magnificent...wonderful...beautiful...sexy...marvellous...gorgeous...brilliant...sexy..."
"You mentioned that one"
"Well-you're-doubly-sexy...amazing...breathtaking...and if I say anymore I may not be liable for my actions."
"Mmm...counting on it." Margaret paused whilst Hawkeye kept at his assault on her neck
"What?" he said not looking up.
"I can tell I'm going to have to wear a sweater tomorrow."
"Why?" he said with his mouthful.
"I'm going to look like a leper in a few hours," she said with a cheeky grin.
"So...I'm taking what I want and they can get theirs."
"Mmm...and you can take all you want." Margaret said, moaning as he hit a sensitive spot.
"Planning on it," he replied, staying in that one place, driving Margaret to heights she had only learned that night she knew existed.
"Oh God!" Margaret gasped as he moved slowly down her body.
"Mmm...I love you Margaret."
"I love you too Hawkeye."

They spent the last few hours of the night together, slowly and passionately making up for lost time, but knowing they will never get back what they waited so long to take.

When dawn awoke, Margaret was half lying on his chest, looking into his eyes and toying with his hair in her fingers.

"What?" he said with a smile, she didn't answer. "Wha-at?" he asked with a chuckle, his smile growing bigger as he looked into her eyes and played with her hair.
"Nothing," she replied, a soft satisfied smile on her sleepy face.
"You seem happy," he commented.
"After a night like that who wouldn't be?" she asked with a hint of 'are you kidding me?' in her tone.
"Just checking," he said, picking up and kissing the back of her hand.
"MmmmHmmm...that's nice," Margaret lamented, drifting in and out of a sleepy haze.
"Someone's tired..." Hawkeye commented.
"Gee...I wonder why? I could sleep for a week...you really wore me out last night."
"BELIEVE me the feeling is definitely mutual." Hawkeye said, threading his fingers through hers.
"I don't want you to go back to the Swamp" Margaret said with a pout, bringing their hands under her head.
Hawkeye pulled her up into his arms, "Neither do I...but unless you want everyone finding out..."
"I don't care...I just want to be with you."
Hawkeye was surprised, "You sure?"
"That I want to be with you or not caring about other people? First one YES...more sure of that than anything ever..." Hawkeye grinned "The second...No, I really couldn't care less what they thought. If we try to hide it it's like we have something to be ashamed about...and I'm" yawn not. You're not ashamed of it?"
"Of course not...I love you...and I have absolutely nothing to be ashamed of." Hawkeye pulled he blankets up over her shoulders, "come on...let's get some sleep."
"Yeah" Margaret said, dozing. Hawkeye kissed her on the head and soon both were asleep, oblivious to the awakening camp around them.

By around 11, people were starting to notice that Margaret wasn't around. The regular army major was usually up with the sun, then again, she had been through a rough ordeal, and whatever happened between her and Hawkeye would make it even worse. They of course weren't worried about Hawkeye's no show...he was usually awake around now and because of the previous few days; people concluded that he was probably still sleeping.

True he was still sleeping. They just assumed where he was. BJ and Charles knew he hadn't come home last night. Charles suspected he was off with some nurse...BJ suspected which nurse. After his conversation with Hawkeye the night before, he knew what had to be done, and hopefully a little encouragement went a LONG way.

It was gaining on midday when Margaret stirred. Hawkeye mumbled something, but slumbered on. The two had moved that morning so they were now spooning.

Margaret closed her eyes and leaned into him, taking in his sent – a mixture of deodorant of some sorts, and their passionate night before. She concluded not to wake him, as she was enjoying their still warmth and the security of him just being there. She stared at her wedding ring on the table...she had taken it off last night before Hawkeye had arrived...she smiled at it. Not because of what it meant - a horrid, cheap reminder of a mistake she made...one that she was planning on rectifying immediately (well it could wait til later) – but because Hawkeye had gone to the trouble of finding a replacement, putting his disagreement of her marriage aside to make her happy. Margaret took a glance at her clock. 11:57. 'Nearly noon...ahhh stuff it!' she thought and snuggled in deeper. Finding herself drifting off to sleep again, she felt warm kisses on her neck.

"Mmm..." she moaned, chills running down her spine.
"Is that a happy Mmm or a grumpy I hate mornings Mmm?" he asked.
"Mmm...it's a 'I love what you're doing but I want to sleep!' kind of Mmm."
"Me too...but I'm hungry."
Margaret gave a chuckle, "You didn't get enough last night?"
"I got MORE than I expected last night!" Hawkeye replied with a devilish grin on his face.
Margaret rolled her eyes, "I was talking about actual food...you know...the one we got with our presents last night?"
"Oh that...no, right after you left I went to the Swamp to try and calm my nerves. When you hit...you hit hard."
Margaret sat up, "Did I? I'm so sorry Hawkeye! I never meant to do it that hard...or even at all really...I was just upset by everything and..."
"Margaret, forget it ever happened okay?" he asked hopeful.
"I am sorry..."
"I know," he whispered.
"If I can make it up to you..."
"Oh you did enough of making up last night." Hawkeye said with wide eyes.
Margaret giggled and snuggled up again, facing each other. "Was it really that good?"
"Good doesn't even begin to describe last night. Can we settle for 'a magical experience never forgotten and maybe, hopefully frequently repeated?'" he asked hopeful, knowing the answer.
"MmmmHmmm" was her only reply. Hawkeye wrapped his arms around her as they kissed.

Hawkeye's stomach rumbled, breaking the romantic and passionate mood in the air.
"Maybe we should go see if they have anything left?"
"I was just thinking that," Margaret replied, nodding her head as they broke away.
"You seen my pants?" he asked, looking around the clothed-ridden tent floor.
"Uh what colour are they?" Margaret asked seriously, not thinking.
Hawkeye looked at her oddly "Margaret think over what you just said."
"Uh, what colo...oh right...sorry wasn't thinking straight." Margaret grinned sheepishly as she got down and looked through the pile of clothes.
"So what are we gonna say?" Hawkeye asked, sitting on her cot.
"Why should we say anything?" she asked, still looking.
"Because BJ and Charles would know I didn't go home last night."
Margaret stopped and sat up, "Good point. Pants."
"Thank you" he said, putting them on.
"The truth?" she asked still half sitting on the ground.
"What? 'Where were you last night?' 'Oh, I was over in Margaret's tent having the best sex of my life.' That?"
"Maybe not so eloquent as you put it, but something along those lines. Now...can you PLEASE help me find your shirt?" she asked with a pathetic chuckle.
"Okay..." he got down next to her. "Do you remember where I threw it?"
"I was otherwise occupied at the time if you don't recall."
"You were? Hmm...never of noticed."
Margaret swatted him on his arm, "Well you should...YOU were the reason I was occupied."
"Ah ha!" Hawkeye stood up and grabbed it off the top of her closet.
"It's a shame you found it...I was quite enjoying the view without it," She said smugly.
"I could say the same for you...that is the nicest birthday suit I've ever seen...who's you're tailor?" he asked in his usual sly way.
"OH...YOU!" she said standing up, swatting him again. "But thank you all the same" she said with a cheeky grin.

"Now...socks..."
"YOU can look for those," Margaret said firmly.
"Why?"
"Because you're a big boy now...plus they smell!"
"Only a little..." he murmured.
"And if I didn't love you so damn much...you'd be outta here in a flash!"
"Well I'm glad to know you don't want me for my socks" Hawkeye lamented, smiling, taking her into his arms.
"No, not your socks..." she said with a happy sigh.
"Now why am I standing here clothed and you naked?" he asked.
"Because you won't let go of me," she said with a chuckle.

"Because we're looking for my socks..." he said, looking under the pile of clothes..."Jacket, pants, shirt, underwear..." he was discarding them over his shoulder, making another pile behind him.
"You couldn't put them in the basket could you?" Margaret complained
"Huh? Oh sorry...AH HAAAAA!!!! Socks!" he said triumphantly
"Don't you dare put them near my face or I swear our deal is OFF!"
"That would be a breach of contract...we signed a deal remember? Any breaking of the deal we would have to make another, stating said deal was broken."
"And what would that include?"
"Same way it was made."
"Hmm...tough decision. Break the deal and spend another fabulous night with you. Keep the deal and spend many more fabulous nights with you...it's a toughie, but I'll have to go with the second option."
"Wise decision!" Hawkeye grabbed and kissed her to make the decision about the deal final.

"So are you going to spend the rest of the day like that, or are we going to go eat?" Hawkeye was getting rather hungry...they hadn't eaten anything since the previous morning...one look at the 8063rd's buffet of slop and gruel would make sewer rats sick.
"Is food all you ever think about?" Margaret asked whilst starting to get dressed.
"Nope: food, booze, surgery, sleep, sex...and you of course. But you fit into all 5.
"Oh do I now? How..."
"I eat with you, drink with you, operate with you, and now I sleep and have sex with you. All wonderful traits to have in a woman."
"Why thank you...I'm glad I fit into your world. Now have you seen my black sweater?" she asked him hopeful, after pulling on her pants. Hawkeye was lying back on the cot, watching her every movement...and loving every one she made. "You were wearing it the past few days."
"Oh right...wonderful!" she grumbled sitting down at her table.

Hawkeye sat up and looked at her, "What are you doing now?"
Margaret was looking at her mirror...like she said there would be, there were numerous marks on her neck. "Surveying the damage...I've seen less spots on a leopard." Hawkeye sat back on the cot and laughed. "I'm glad you think this is so amusing!" she mumbled, walking over and sitting next to him, putting on socks.
"Margaret, chill out, so what if you have a few marks?"
"A few marks? A FEW marks? Here, since you're the culprit, take a look at the work you did."
"Yeah, you got a few beauts there...wait...this one looks like Canada!" he said giggling.
"A great help you are!"
"Come here" Hawkeye pulled her onto his lap. "You told me earlier that you weren't ashamed of us right?" Margaret nodded in response. "And that you wanted people to know about us."
"Hey, now I never said that. I said I didn't care what they knew."
"Same thing!"
"No it's not...look...Hawkeye...I'm facing reality in that they WILL find out, not matter how hard we try not to. I mean look what happened with me and..."
"Don't say it!" the last thing Hawkeye wanted to hear was 'me and Frank Burns'.
"Everyone knew, not matter how much we denied it..."
"Then what's so bad about them knowing? A: We can cuddle like this B: People will respect us more if they know. By showing we have nothing to hide and nothing to be ashamed of, we're bigger people."
Margaret wasn't convinced, "Respect?"
"Yes respect, EVEN from the nurses."

A sudden thought hit her...one that she wasn't sure she wanted to hear the answer to, "Can I ask you something?"
"Of course"
"Why didn't they work?"
Hawkeye thought for a moment...he didn't want to upset her with an answer she didn't like. "Because I was never in love with any of them. There was nothing that made them stand out against one another. Or, in a few cases some of them had very warped ideals about people."
'Hmmm...good answer' she thought. "Even now?"
"No, the nurses now are really great. But you stand out so much more than they do...and not just because you're a Major."
Margaret was still uncertain; especially of what could happen in the future, "But what if one comes along that does stand out...one you like more than me?"
"Then I'll think of this moment, and you, and remember that I love you and only you. Plus I'd be hoping you'd have her shipped outta here faster than you could say dead doctor."
"You betcha bars I would!" Margaret drew his head in and captured his mouth.

Hawkeye deepened the kiss as he slowly lowered them on the cot. His lips travelled down her neck, as she ran her fingers through his hair.
"You know I really could use some lunch." Margaret said out of the blue.
Hawkeye rolled to his side. "Me too. Come on, let's go."
"Wait!" she said before he opened the door.
"Why?"
"I need to put a shirt on and brush my hair perhaps?" she asked sarcastically.
"Oh right!" he replied sheepishly.
"And your jacket" she threw it to him. Margaret pulled a shirt on and took another look in her mirror. "Oh that's so gonna be noticeable!"
"Who cares? Just shows how much I love you." He responded, wrapping his arms around her waist.
"As much as I love you doing that...it's a bit hard to brush my hair with your arms there."
"Why don't I just meet you there?"
"NO!" she yelled.
"I was joking!" he said with a chuckle.
"Your hair could do with something too..." Margaret thought back to last night...and the argument at the 8063rd. "Sorry."
Hawkeye knew what she had been thinking and didn't want her to feel bad for what she thought, "No, you're right." He quickly put a comb through it to make it fairly respectable looking.
"How do I look?" she asked nervously.
Hawkeye wrapped his arms around her, "Absolutely gorgeous." He leant down and kissed her. "How about me?"
"Cute as all hell." She smiled.
"Well...shall we introduce ourselves to the world?"
Margaret took a deep breath "Better now than never I guess."

Hawkeye walked out ahead of her, Margaret was cautious and hesitant of the many glares that were coming their way. "Margaret...It'll be fine." Hawkeye kissed her on the head and took her hand. "Hey...it's okay, ignore them." He squeezed her hand.
"Easy for you to say," she half smiled.
There were many people whispering, about last night's slap, the arguing from her tent, Hawkeye exiting with her, and their hand holding. Much of the talking heard was 'It's about time' along the lines.

"Hey, better now than never you said." He said as they walked a little faster towards the mess.
"Just because I said it doesn't mean I meant it." Margaret said sarcastically. Hawkeye rolled his eyes and laughed, "Glad you think this is so amusing."
"I find it wonderful, not amusing." Margaret looked at him puzzled; Hawkeye stopped walking and looked at her. "I have you and that's all I care about," he said, embracing her in a warm hug.
"So the only thing I'm laughing about is I got you and they don't!" he whispered.
"Thank you," she closed her eyes and smiled, still holding him to her.

By now there were a lot of wide-eyed people staring at them. The people in the compound had frozen in time. None were quite sure what was going on, but knew they would by the end of the day.
Margaret's stomach grumbled, "We should get some lunch before I eat something I shouldn't."
"We do that everyday here."
"What have you got to complain about? I've eaten it my whole life, mind you it wasn't as bad as this." She whined as they entered the mess tent. Upon seeing the assortment of food laid out, they soon lost their appetites.
"Ugh, I think I'll stick with coffee," Margaret quickly changed her mind.
"I think I'll stick with you too," Hawkeye agreed.

The two sat down at a table with BJ, and Charles.
"So?" BJ said abruptly.
Hawkeye sat down, Margaret just across from him. "So what?" he asked.
"Where have you been?" BJ wanted to know everything.
"Korea, how 'bout you?" was Hawkeye's casual reply, Margaret taking a sip to stifle a laugh.
"You didn't come home last night." BJ was stating the pretty obvious.
"I decided to play zombie...you should try it sometime." Hawkeye wasn't telling him anything.
"Pierce, zombies usually wake up then go...your bed hasn't been slept in since you left." Charles stating, making himself look smarter. Why he knew so much about zombies was a mystery.
"What are you, my mother?" Hawkeye said, slightly annoyed.
"If I was, I'd demand to know where you were all night." Charles quipped back.
"So what if he was out last night...he's a big boy...he doesn't need you two to play chaperone...uh sitter." Margaret said with a slip of her tongue.
"Why Margaret, sounds like you knew where he was."
"I'd have to agree with you there, Hunnicutt...Margaret?"
"How would I know?" Margaret asked.
"Exactly!" Hawkeye added.
BJ wanted the truth...NOW..."You went over to talk to her last night...I figured you two..." he was cut off by Potter who had just walked over and sat down.

"Well, I just got a call from the Swedish MASH at Chorwan. They want a demonstration of the arterial transplant. I figure since Pierce and Houlihan did their duty...it should be one of you two." He nodded towards BJ and Charles.
BJ shook his head and put up his hands in protest.
"Colonel, face it...they were hounded by the enemy...wounded...they came back here bloody and limping...other than one moment of glory in the operating tent...the whole trip for them was a total disaster." Charles didn't want to be volunteered to go.

Hawkeye and Margaret looked at one another and smiled.
"What are you smiling at?" Charles wasn't in the mood, yet he wanted to know what happened.
"I'm not smiling." Hawkeye managed to keep down his smile. He turned and looked at BJ. "What are you smiling at?" he accused him.
BJ suppressed a laugh, he had a fair idea of what happened. Anybody could see they were content...more than two supposed 'friends' should be. "Who's smiling? I'm not smiling."
Margaret glared at the two, thinking about Hawkeye and she swore he muttered something. She then turned to the Colonel, who was smiling. "What are you smiling at?" she demanded
Colonel Potter was trying not to smile, and failing miserably. He just was happy they weren't going at each other...so to speak. "I'm not smiling...this is serious." He couldn't help but smile.
Hawkeye tried not to smile and declared, "Okay, let's cut out the smiling." He looked straight at Margaret who was smiling at him; he could do nothing but smile back.
"I'm not smiling." Colonel Potter and BJ were failing at keeping a straight face.
Charles looked at the four and shook his head angrily. "Alright...I'll go...but...when I get back there better not be any smiling." He said carefully.
"WHO'S SMILING?!" the four yelled, all smiling.

"I give up! Hunnicutt...just ask them!" Charles spat out.
"Ask who them what?" Potter asked, knowing who was them and what was what.
"We were just discussing why Hawkeye didn't come home last night." BJ said straight out.
"And why Margaret seems to know where he was." Charles added.
"And why these two can't keep their big mouths shut."
"Or mind their own business" Hawkeye and Margaret finished, glaring at the two.
"Well I want to know why you and Margaret just exited her tent together?" Potter asked, knowing he was stirring, and knowing what they had discussed earlier last night was true in some way.
"Really?!" BJ said in a high pitched, childish tone. Not uncommon to what Hawkeye had done on previous occasions.
"Now that would explain why you didn't come home last night Pierce." Charles said cheekily.
"Any Holding hands?"
"Maybe even sustaining each other?"
"Not to mention, closing ranks?" Potter, BJ and Charles asked, trying not to laugh.

"I swear...you three have too much time on your hands...you know that!" Hawkeye said pointing a finger, the three men losing the fight and burst out laughing.
Margaret rolled her eyes and looked at Hawkeye. "You betcha ass boys!"

The four men look at her, quite shocked, not because of what was happening necessarily, but because of how she said it. Charles coughed, BJ choked, Potter just stared and Hawkeye grinned...he expected her to come out of her shell soon...but not THAT soon.

"Now if you'll excuse me...I gotta see a man about a divorce." With that she stood up, gave Hawkeye a quick kiss on the head and left, smiling with a spring in her step.

The 3 still had their jaws on the floor and eyes wide. "What?" Hawkeye asked with a stupid grin on his face.
"I think we've gotten past the 'what', try how"
"And when"
"And where"
"And why."
"If you said who I probably woulda hit you."
"WELL?" the three men shouted.
"Okay, no need to yell, keep your shirt on! How: I'm sure all of you know a little thing called love right? When: I guess you figured that one out. Where: that too unless you need a description."
"No need." BJ put his hands up in protest.
"Why? Easy...because Donald's an asshole whose been screwing around. Plus Margaret realised she couldn't be married to one person and love another. There...hope you're happy cause THAT'S all the info you're getting!"
"Would we want to even know the rest?" Charles asked.
"Probably not. In any case you three are NOT knowing anything else...no, not even you Beej..." BJ frowned, he wanted details.
"So is it hush hush or out in the open?" asked Potter.
"Once the papers are sent then we'll announce it. That's not to say we'll hide it til then." Hawkeye sang, grinning like an idiot.
"Well I can't say much more than congratulations" Potter grinned.
"And condolences...I do hope you know what you are getting yourself into Pierce." Charles – always the sceptic – asked.
"I know EXACTLY what's I'm getting into...wouldn't want it any other way." He was still grinning.
"Call me your best friend" BJ mumbled.
"Hey...do I ask about your private life?" Hawkeye spat out.
"I tell you all the time!" BJ protested.
"Yeah, but I never asked did I?" Hawkeye asked, knowing he was right.
"Bu...good point. Damn" BJ muttered.

"Well I'm off...gotta make sure she calls him Penobscott rather than the truth: cheating, lying asshole." With that Hawkeye leaves, running towards the office.
"That boy is HOOKED!" Potter gleamed.
"Line AND sinker" Charles added.
"And it's about TIME!" BJ stated, receiving a 'here here' from the other two.

In the office:

"Klin...oh Radar you're back!"
"Yes m'am," he said saluting.
"At ease Corporal, what do I need to do to get a divorce?"
"A divorce m'am?"
"Yes Corporal,"
"So the rumours about you and Capt'n Pierce are real?" he asked calmly.
Margaret smiled, "Yes, now...what do I have to do?"
"Oh uh...well there's these forms to...fill...out" Radar fumbled through his draws, finding the appropriate forms to fill out. "Uh...and m'am, you got a lawyer?"
Margaret looked at him and stiffened slightly, "Yeah...I gotta lawyer." she said, mentally thinking that if she ever saw that slime-ball again she'd castrate him.
"Uh, that's it..."
"How fast can these be processed?" she asked, not looking up from filling in what she needed to. Just then Hawkeye walked in to make sure everything was alright.
"Hey," he smiled at her. Margaret smiled back, relieved that he was there. "You alright?"
"I'm contemplating what to call him: heartless bastard or cheating asshole?" Radar went red.
"Stick with Penobscott...cheating asshole will only confuse people." Hawkeye answered.
"Yeah, maybe."

Radar sensing tension in the air spoke up... "Uh, I gotta go feed my animals now..." he ran out of the office, faster than a rabbit.
"You didn't scare him or anything?"
"I didn't yell at him...but I think I scared him more by not doing that."
Hawkeye laughed...true to many, Margaret was scarier when she was nice. "You sure you're alright?"
"It's just so much to take in...3 months ago I was on my honeymoon and we had only just become good friends...and now I'm starting the divorce and sleeping with you."
"Yeah, but what would you rather have?" he asked, taking her hands in his, sitting down on the chair.
"Why do you need to ask? Hands down winner is you."
"See – no hesitation. You've got what you want and are going for it...THAT'S the Margaret I know." Hawkeye smiled, stroking her hands. "And love." He pulled her onto his lap and wrapped his arms around her.
"HAWKEYE!" she squealed.
"MARGARET" he mimicked in a high-pitched tone.
"You're a real bastard you know that?"
"No, I believe my parents were married when I was born," he shot back.
"Well...you're a Smartass at the least," she said quietly.
"Mmm and what am I at the most?" he asked pulling her closer.
"We could be here all night if I start," she said seductively.
"I'm willing to take the chance," he said in a low voice, capturing her mouth with his in a passionate kiss.

Potter came walking in, "Radar I was...geez will you two get a room!" Margaret shot up quickly.
"We got one...YOU'RE in it."
"This is my office!"
"No, THAT is your office," Hawkeye pointed.
"Oh you know what I mean. Please, we're all over the moon for you both...just keep it in the room...YOUR room," he said, pointing to Margaret.
"Told you this was a bad idea," she muttered.
"No, actually you called me a real bastard and a Smartass at the least. And you were just going into what I was at the most until we were rudely interrupted."
"Well sor-ry for interrupting the mating rituals of the army. Please...carry on...IN YOUR OWN TENT!" Potter yelled the last bit.
"Colonel! We weren't doing anything! I came in to start the hopefully short divorce of that 2-timing scumbag asshole Penobscott...and HE..."
"ME?"
"YES you...interrupted, scaring poor Radar..."
"That was you...he's not used to you being nice..."
"Shut up! AND then pulled..."
"Okay, okay I get the picture...I don't need the details though. Just please...keep the public displays of affection down and not so much in public...we don't know who could be dropping by." Potter asked...well...pleaded with them.
"Sure thing Colonel! You are such a liar Houlihan!"
"Me? This...coming from you...the serial practical joker? HA!"
"I think I need a drink!" Potter rolled his eyes and walked into his office.
"That was all YOUR influence!"
"AS IF!"
"WILL YOU TWO FIND SOMETHING PRODUCTIVE TO DO?" Potter yelled.
"We did that last night..." Hawkeye said with an evil grin.
"HAWKEYE!" Margaret went red.
"What?" he said grinning like an idiot.
"SHUT UP!" she hit him on the arm.
"OW!" he yelled.

"Listen to the woman Pierce...she knows the limits..." Potter had his head in his hands. "Don't kibitz when you find something productive – pardon the pun – to do."
Hawkeye went into a riotous laugh, Margaret covered her eyes, her face bright red with embarrassment.
"This is all YOUR fault!" she said, trying to not laugh. Hawkeye was still laughing; Margaret was still on his lap. "I really don't think Potter wants to know about our sex life."
"You're right...he doesn't" Potter grumbles.

"You right now?" she asks him as the laughter dies down.
Hawkeye wipes his eyes "I'm sorry honey, but that was..."
"Don't say it!" she said, annoyed.
"Come on...it was only a joke! What's wrong?" he asked, sensing she was upset.
"Grounds for divorce...I mean what do I say? They only give three lines to write in."
"Adultery. Simple as...oh right." Hawkeye stopped when he realised why she looked upset. He pulled her closer to him and wrapped his arms around her "Well he did..."
"So did we"
"Yeah...but how many times had he done this before? At least twice right? Anyway you were on your way to divorcing the asshole."
"So? I was still married...I AM still married!" Margaret got up and started pacing.
"No, you're separated. That's different. Forget a damn piece of paper...it's what you feel. What do you feel for him?"
"Hatred," she said not missing a beat.
"Then that's how you react to him. Do you want help with this?" he asked, looking at Margaret who was clearly upset and distressed.
"No...it's something I gotta do for myself." She said, sitting back down on Hawkeye's lap.
"Okay...why don't you go back to your tent...if you need anything I'll be around and BJ's on Post Op."
"And I'm in here" Potter yelled. He wasn't really eavesdropping...just playing concerned 'parent.'
"See...don't forget that."
"I know" she smiled, standing up. "Well...wish me luck!"
"You got me...what more luck could ya need?" Hawkeye stood up and said devilishly. Margaret swatted him with the papers.
"You are so full of yourself you know that?"
"All the time!"
Margaret shook her head giggling, "I'll see you later!"

She started to walk out when Hawkeye called out to her "Hey...you forgot something."
"What?" Hawkeye took her in his arms and kissed her. "Must never forget that."
"I'll try to remember for future reference...I know you'll remind me if I do."
Hawkeye replied with a grin, "Every minute of the day." Margaret smiled back at him and walked out.

Hawkeye sat back down, still grinning like an idiot. He was quite pleased with himself; he had a wonderful girlfriend who was in many ways possibly the one. Yet also it could be one big disaster. He tried not to think of the consequences of them becoming a couple...because he wanted the fairytale romance...and while Korea was no fairytale...there was always the romance part to lean back on. After a minute or so, Hawkeye stood up and walked into Potter's office...just because he didn't know what else to do.

"Can I help you with anything Pierce?" Hawkeye had walked over to the liquor cabinet, flashes of Henry at his desk and Trapper sitting in front of him, running through his mind. 'God I miss them.' "Pierce?" Potter asked more forcefully.
"What Henry...I mean Colonel?"
"You alright?"
"Of course, why wouldn't I be? Drink?"
Potter nodded, "That's the first time you called me Henry. Anything the matter?"
Hawkeye sat down with the scotch and two glasses, "I miss them."
"Henry and Trapper?" Hawkeye nodded. "Any particular reason?"
"I'm sitting out there with Margaret and I couldn't be happier. Well home in Maine with Margaret maybe. But this is the happiest I've been in Korea, ya know?"
Potter nodded in agreement.
"Yet I come in here and I can't feel a sense of...almost betrayal. This office was the focal point of many great times for us. Just general talk and joking around...joking around at Margaret and Frank's expense. And now I'm with her...I feel terrible when I remember all the times we had...and I feel somewhat guilty because those times are now for me something I wanna forget...and I don't ever want to forget them." Hawkeye drank his glass in one mouthful and re-filled it.
Potter stood up and sat across from Hawkeye. "Son...those times you had are different from now. You're a different person. If what I hear from Margaret and Radar is anything to go by, you've done a heck of a lot of growing since then. The past is the past...you can't change that. Remember the times for what they were...and surely they weren't all as bad as you say."
Hawkeye half-smiled and nodded in reply and took another drink.
"See. I promise you, with Radar and Klinger and naturally Margaret around, you won't ever forget about Blake and McIntyre."
"What about Margaret?"
"That's something the two of you need to discuss...just not now. She has more than enough on her plate."
"I wasn't gonna try and breach it with her. It's just...this room. I remember we..." Hawkeye began to laugh. "Did I ever tell you the time Trapper and I stole Henry's desk?"
Potter had heard it before, but knew Hawkeye was stressed and just let him talk. "No I don't think you have." And Hawkeye began to tell the familiar tale of when desks fly.

"And the stripes were going across!" The two men were laughing at Hawkeye's tales of pranking, practical joking and all things against the army. They had been talking for well over 2 hours, a bottle of scotch and Radar had come in only twice for Potter to sign something. The look he got said 'private talk' and Radar stayed well clear of the two.

Meanwhile Margaret was getting agitated over the forms she had to fill out. Sure they had all been done nice and...sorta neat in triplicate (after all it was Radar who had said her writing was bad enough for her to be a doctor). She was now in the process of writing to her father's lawyer...she never trusted the one her mother had...sleazy slime-ball was the edited version of what she thought of him. She knew Dave would help her out; he was a family friend after all...but the frustration of what her sister almost went though annoyed her. It was the almost part she was uncomfortable with.
After breaking the handle off one of her brushes, she decided to take a break. Wandering out into the compound, she glared back at the few looks that came her way, they quickly went, knowing what 'Major Houlihan' was capable of. Not knowing where Hawkeye was she headed for Post Op to talk to BJ.

Going through the end door, she saw him consulting Bigelow on a chart, she looked confused and he was obviously in thought. After reading it over a few times and saying a few words, she replied, happy with the result.
"Hey Margaret...lost your Hawk?" BJ joked.
Margaret just looked at him smugly, "You could say that. I left him in the office about...2 and a half hours ago and haven't seen him since."
"He's probably still there." Margaret seemed nervous and distant...like something was bothering her. "You alright?"
"It's just...something's on my mind...it'll keep."
"No, I'm not doing much, spill your gut...so to speak" he replied smiling.
Margaret half-smiled back at him, "It's really a case for someone who's been here since the beginning, someone other than Hawkeye. I mean no offence...but there's sides of me that you haven't seen yet and..."
"You afraid of what he thinks of you?"
"How did you guess?" she asked sheepishly
"Margaret, Hawk's had a thing for you for quite some time...even before I got here there was something. He's probably as worried about this whole thing as you are. Put your insecurities aside. He's seen more of you than any of us ever will...and I don't just mean that physically." BJ said with a smirk.
"If anyone had Hawk would have beaten them by now."
"See...over-protective loving boyfriend is what every gal needs."
"But what if this all turns to hell on me?"
"You mean if he hurts you?" Margaret nodded "Then we'll beat the living daylights out of him." He finished smiling. Margaret was content with that answer...not entirely happy about the situation...but better. "Have you talked to him about this?"
"A bit...but we were a little preoccupied with another agenda." She said with a cheeky grin.
"And that's all you're gonna tell me right?"
"Of course!"
"Can't get any details from you...can't get anything out of Hawkeye...you're a bad influence on him Houlihan." Margaret just laughed...the day someone was a bad influence on Hawkeye Pierce would be the day Charles would start giving away money. BJ became serious "Just talk to him...not now...wait a little til things settle."
"Yeah...I've been in my tent for the past few hours tearing my hair out over this whole divorce. I just want it signed and over with. Once and for all"
"Yeah...but hey...it can't last forever...soon the two of you will be off making little Pierces, set your mind to that." Margaret chuckled at the thought of her and Hawkeye with a baby...then realised it wasn't such a bad thing after all.
"That I can do...thanks BJ." She said smiling.
"Anytime Margaret."

Margaret walked out of Post Op and into the office, to find Radar furiously typing away. "He's still in there m'am." He said, not looking up. "Thank you Corporal." Margaret listened to the conversation before going in...mainly it was laughter.
"Everything alright?" Hawkeye looked up at her when she walked in.
"Now it is...I decided I needed a break before I broke anything else."
"Anything else?"
"It's replaceable...don't worry." Margaret assured him, sitting down next to him.
"Drink Margaret?" asked Potter.
"Yeah...thanks"
"Hey...what's wrong?"
"I don't want to wait for the divorce..."
"Sorry?" Hawkeye asked, thoroughly confused.
"Let's announce it now! I want to start my new life now...not wait til everything's done."
"Whatever you want Margaret." Hawkeye said happily.
"What brought this on?" asked Potter.
"I've just been thinking...taken advice from a few people...and that's what I want."
"Well...what can I say but I'm happy for the both of you and you have my blessing." He said smiling.
"Yes dad!" Hawkeye joked, the other two chuckled.
"Thank you Colonel."
"Well that's what families are for!"