Rated: M
Author: Skyllar Eve
Beta: Eriisu
Summary:Sakura decides to go on a secret mission to fulfill her new secret desire of revenge upon a certain old friend. In the midst of enmity, resentment and pent up aggression they find something within them both. Something never seen before.
Capricious: Liable to sudden unpredictable changes.

Capricious

Epilogue


How many times had she been called weak, worthless, a hindrance?

Too many times to count.

And as much as it hurt her female pride, she had begun to believe it. Everything leading up to now only gave more reason for her to believe those accusations.

In the past, all she had been was a hindrance to her team. Always needing to be protected, always last to the finish line, always the weakest link. She cried too many nights because of this.

But now, after several years of tears, blood, and training—far after she'd dropped—she was stronger. Physically and emotionally. She was now nineteen years old: a women. One of which was very capable of doing anything she set her mind to.

For six years straight, after being taken under Tsunade's wing, she trained like there was no tomorrow. Half because Tsunade nearly killed her too many times to count, along with threats that if she didn't work harder, Tsunade really would hurt her. The other half, her being so self motivated to get stronger that she would go through deathly training sessions any day.

After those six years of being the legendary sannin's apprentice, she had finally gained some self-confidence.

It frustrated her thoroughly to the point where she nearly ripped her hair out to think how inconceivably stupid and blind she had been back in her adolescent years; to think that she could actually be even close to matching Sasuke's level of power and fierceness he had while in battle. She'd always been a few steps behind the group.

But now, she truly believed she stood a chance against him. She had to prove herself to him, but not just him, to herself as well. She wanted to show everyone that she wasn't just some little girl anymore that needed constant protection.

She'd finally grown a spine, but she had to figure out a way to get to him. There was no way Tsunade would allow Sakura to go on that type of mission by herself, despite her current ANBU ranking.

Her feelings for the Uchiha over the years had finally faded away. She was no longer desperate for his praise and attention. She grimaced, looking back at how pathetic she was as a kid.

Now, she didn't exactly despise him, but was pretty close to it. She wanted to beat him to a bloody pulp. To show him how it felt to be constantly put down. To show him all the pain he put Naruto and herself through over the years.

What caused this strong hatred that boiled in her blood, she assumed, was when she realized that he had just used everyone around him to get what he wanted. He was an opportunist, praying on the people that could get him closer to his goal.

Killing Itachi.

Another thing that pissed her off was his strong intent to kill Itachi since he was a little freaking kid. She didn't understand how a kid so young could hold so much abhorrence towards someone. He was only giving Itachi exactly what he wanted, giving him the satisfaction the sadistic bastard craved.

She had no idea why she was being so negative today. It was different from her normal cheery persona.

"Ne, Sakura-chan!" She snapped out of her trance.

"Are your noodles not good or something? You've been glaring at them for the past five minutes!" A loud blonde exclaimed in her ear. She held back the desire to pummel his face in.

She laughed nervously, waving a hand at him.

"I've just got some things on my mind!" She tried explaining without sounding too suspicious.

Naruto, easily convinced, went back to slurping on his noodles.

Deciding she wasn't hungry anymore, she excused herself from Ichiraku, declining Naruto's offer to walk her home since it was so late at night.

She began roaming the streets of Konoha with no particular destination in mind. She started wondering how she'd be able to get herself out of Konoha to get a hold of the Uchiha's ass without raising suspicions. She could always ask for an extended vacation, she supposed. Explain to Tsunade that she needed to go out and explore the world. But she highly doubted—

Her thoughts were interrupted by her body coming to an abrupt halt. Soft cotton touched her face, she realized she hadn't been paying attention to her surroundings and to where exactly she'd been going. Stepping back, she looked up to the persons face.

She sighed with relief to find that it was only Kakashi. He stared at her for several moments before deciding to speak.

"Got something on your mind, Sakura?" His voice held indifference in it, as he waited for a response.

"You could say that," His shoulders slouched a bit.

He cautiously stared at her, Sakura feeling as if he were peering through her. Seeing right into her soul. It was an uncomfortable feeling she noted, as she shifted her weight under his gaze.

Putting a hand on her shoulder, in an almost friendly—or even fatherly—way, he spoke.

"Don't do anything rash," he paused, "You're a smart girl, I don't want you to do something you'll only end up regretting."

How was it that he always knew whether or not she was troubled? It was like he knew exactly what she was thinking without her having to say a word. In a way, it comforted her, to know that someone was watching out for her, but the other part of her felt very vulnerable.

She put on a smile, trying to feign happiness, knowing Kakashi didn't believe it for a second. It was nearly as bad as Sai's smiles.

"Thank you, Kakashi-sensei," she slightly bowed. Even after all these years, she'd never dropped his title even though he stopped being her teacher a long time ago.

After that, she left, swiftly walking home.

He could only wonder what she was up to. He just prayed for her that she wouldn't do anything drastic, a feeling he had been troubling him for awhile now.

His words echoed through her brain as she laid in bed that night.

"Don't do anything rash."

What would be considered as rash? She wondered.

It was a dumb question that she knew the answer to.

What she'd been planning—leaving Konoha to kick Sasuke's ass—was very rash, she knew.

However, she realized that she needed a break from life. From the hospital, ANBU, missions, Konoha. Everything. She just needed to get away for awhile. For how long, she was not sure.

She would request a vacation tomorrow with Tsunade for sure. She wasn't exactly sure what Tsunade's answer would be. But that was for tomorrow, she decided, drifting off into a restless slumber.


So here she stood in Tsunade's office, fidgeting nervously under Tsunade's intense gaze. Her teacher waited, beginning to lose the little patience she had.

"I need-or am requesting for a vacation Tsunade-sama." Tsunade's facial features remained stoic as she stared at Sakura.

"For how long?" She rested her head upon her hands.

"I'm not sure," she paused, "I need some time away." Sakura swallowed the lump in her throat that began to appear from her lies.

Well, not complete lies, she tried to comfort herself. Just half the truth.

"I just need to explore the world and what's out there—" Before Sakura could finish her ramblings, a hand rose to stop her from continuing.

Tsunade's eyes shut momentarily. The silence that held in the room for several moments felt heavy, the atmosphere tense.

"Say no more, Sakura." Sakura sighed.

"I will give you an extended vacation, but only since you've never broached the subject of ever having one at all, throughout the years," Tsunade looked a little bothered, perhaps because she didn't know what to say, having her number one pupil put her on the spot like this.

What Sakura was saying, Tsunade could understand since many years ago that's exactly what she did. And was exactly what she was doing before named Hokage. Along with gambling. She nearly shuddered at the thought of her horrendous bad luck.

She continued on, "You may be on vacation as long as you wish." Sakura's eyes widened with obvious shock. "Just promise me this one thing," Tsunade's voice was very powerful and serious eyes bore into Sakura's.

"That you'll come back…alive." Tsunade was not about to lose someone yet again that was precious to her. She trusted Sakura and that she would not die. It was a cruel world out there, Tsunade knew, but she could only hope that she had taught Sakura well enough.

Sakura began to cry, complying with Tsunade's wishes. She couldn't promise that she would come back alive.

But for Tsunade's sake, she promised anyway.

Tsunade had a feeling that there was more to the story then Sakura was willing to tell, but she questioned her no further. She could only hope that Sakura's judgment was better than hers when she was Sakura's age.

After leaving Tsunade's office, she decided tomorrow she would leave Konoha. Her shishou provided for the expenses she would have to deal with out of Konoha such as hotel, food and clothes.

It was a lot of money, she'd noticed. And when she said a lot. She meant a lot.

She went ahead and got her goodbyes out of the way. Naruto nearly cried.

He did cry actually, like a baby. It comforted her, the way how he has always been so animated. He begged her to take her with him, but she told him she needed some time alone, reassuring him that she'd be back soon. The twinge she felt inside was guilt for lying again.

Ino had shrieked bloody murder in losing her best friend and threw a bitch-fit. Sakura told her she'd write her, even though she would probably not.

And Sai, he said something he hadn't meant in a bad way, but Sakura still took it as first processed, which left him buried into the wall of his home. She knew he still didn't understand completely how humans worked.

She visited Shikamaru Nara too. They had become close over the past two years. He comforted her a lot just by being his lazy, common sense self. They were shoji buddies, although she'd only beat him twice before.

She plopped onto her bed, nervous for the following days to come. She felt a big change coming, but was not sure if it would be good or bad.

She could only hope for the best.


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