My first 'Friends' work, focusing on Chandler and the brain blast on his personality I had a couple of seconds ago. I donno where this will go, depending on the response this could be a stand alone drabble, there may be companion pieces or I could turn it into a story just tell me what you want.
Chandler couldn't stand unfilled silences.
It made him nervous, and would blurt out whatever he was thinking which usually got him in trouble. But he continued to do as such. Because it seemed to him whatever random, insensitive comment he pulled out of no where, wasn't as personal as an awkward silence. And his rambling and nervous chattering wasn't nearly as deathening as the sounds of silence.
He wasn't sure why but he couldn't control his impulse, he also wasn't sure why his life consisted around his own little defense mechanisms.
Sarcasm being the most obvious one, the one that also linked in with his silence complex and his inability to stop his mouth, but he had a few more subtle mechanisms that even his closest friends failed to notice or passed up as one of his more strange qualities.
Like his compulsion to try and undo situations it always felt to him that by doing something that designates the opposite feeling, he can regain control over the situation that he lost. Although this seems to clash with his sarcasm and silence problem as he blurts out things and then tries to deny that he ever said anything.
He always thought these weren't some of his better qualities and if he really wanted to think about it, it must relate to a need of control in his life. He thinks that's why Monica is his closest female friend. She also displays a need for control in her life, and while Chandler handles this verbally, she channels it physically, by controlling her environment rather than emotions and conversations.
He sees it in Phoebe too, as much as she tries to hide it. She controls with opposing views, she steers people and backs people into corners by starting arguments. He's not sure if she even knows she does it, and if this control complex effects her more radical beliefs- as she is just trying to cause conflict. He supposes that's why he can communicate so well with her, though her habit forces her to come off a little bitchy and intolerable which means he can't stand long bouts with her.
He wonders if it may have to do with neglect, all three of them were in one way or another neglected as a child, though it is on three different levels of the spectrum from minor neglect and severe emotional abuse, to severe neglect and lesser emotional abuse. And of course himself, which was an unhealthy dose of both.
Which leads to his biggest problem and it's not even a combination of his other problems, but one glaring, most obvious flaw in his personality that he, himself is surprised and a little relieved that none of his friends had pick up on it.
Chandler is overly private and secretive.
Which seem a little odd if you had ever met him, and his outgoing and sarcastic nature. But he can feel himself slipping right at this very moment, into his tricks and lies while he's talking to his friends in the coffee house. He mentions his father's sexuality in a joke, receiving a half hearted laugh from a few of his nicer friends. He can feel it wearing thin on them, but they don't question why he acts this way.
He had found out early, the key to a successful lie is confidence which would makes him great sales man, or speaker in conferences. Not that he is lying now per say, or even hiding his feelings, but the fact of sticking to a few very simple points.
His father is gay
his mother embarrasses him
his mother is a romance novelist, no one was around in his childhood
his father used to dress up like a women to school functions
his father runs a cross-dressing Vegas burlesque
he's an only child.
He picks a few points in his life to stick with; he figured parent professions were necessary, which opened up the can of worms which is his father. Even still he stick to a few very clear points, he brings up thanksgiving, parent teacher night and a swim meet, beyond that his father never did a thing to embarrass him… as far as they know.
He bangs these points so hard it seems like he's giving away a life story, when really all he's giving is a small fraction, which he prefers, he's quiet happy to know they don't really know who he was and where he came from on a whole.
It's not a lack of trust, or even the stories he wont tell- but simply a preference to keep people at arms length.
He prefers them to think that his father moved out straight away rather than the actual fact of a two year custody/divorce battle which involved both of his parents living in the house because it affected the outcome. He preferred for them not to know his father deliberately tried entice him to the 'gay' life style as he puts it, by inviting promiscuous 'business associates' around all the time as an absolute screw you to his mother. Which ended up being a screw you to only Chandler as it made him insecure about his sexuality, and feminie with no role model to tell him other wise- but he hadn't minded to much at the time because for at least the time his parents were talking to him when they used to just talk through him.
And he'd rather them not know what he's seen in his life or the kinds of abuse he received from his parents, his two cousins emotional or other wise and he deffinatly didn't want them to know that the boys at his all boy school used considered him 'passable for a girl' if he pulled his hair up. Which also lead to his insecure sexuality.
Things like that just seemed to delicate for even a best friend- especially for a best friend. The fear of loosing control, or losing the people he cares about would be too much for anyone to bear.
He never meant to become so invested in his friends, or his lies but it had just worked out that way.
So as he snaps back a sarcastic comment from something mean Phoebe said about him, or says some sarcastic but less than vicious jab at Monica's cleaning. He feels- he knows if he can just keep control everything will be okay.
But everything's not okay he can feel it. He felt it the second the coffee house doors swung open with such incredible force.
With the doors open he can see the door on all his secrets opening, and he see a person he swore he'd never see again staring back at him intently. He can feel tension and the confusion in the air and as he hears a few hurried words spring from both their mouths he knows he's losing. And as he shifts uncomfortably in his chair as this person looks back at him expectantly he knows he's losing.
And as everyone looks at him, expectantly as to divulge something more personal than he's willing to talk about he knows he's losing.
And now he wishes he knew how to deal better with unfilled silences.