The fire inside her burned brighter
the the fire around her.
THE FEELING OF INTENSE ANGER SWIRLED INSIDE THE small's red-haired body. It was burning deep in her bones, and it was written firmly in her mind. Together came the feeling of guilt, because despite being overly frustrated on her younger brother, the love she held for him was unquestionable. The red haired girl was a person who is usually spreading elan between her family, but even the most colourful people have a grey side.
The girl's dark brown eyes, almost mistaken as black abyss, glared daggers at the younger male of three years. She just wants to give a good slap to her brother for being so stupid and reckless (not that she isn't.) just because he didn't let down his pride. He needs to understand that he can't talk back in this way to their parents, as they are doing whatever they can to keep them alive with a roof above their head but despite telling him this fact every time, he still doesn't understands as he keeps asking for more and more.
"But mom, I went to Kaiden's last night and we-" Her brother Patron, said. Only to be interrupted by his mother.
"-Patron, I don't have any more money! The ones I have is for your lunch, and for the rest of the week! I can't give you any." Her mother Lauren, protested. A soft glare in her features as she looked at her youngest kid.
"But you gladly give me some yesterday!" He exclaimed back at her, frustrated tears running down his thin and small face. Patron was very infinitesimal for his age.
"Yes I did, but it was for the whole week. I told you exactly that before you went out. And now look, you don't have any change. And I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I won't give you any more either. Learn from your mistakes! The money we give you is your responsibility! I warned you yesterday, but you did the exact opposite of what I told you. You spent your money on useless things!"
Patron's voice raised eight octaves higher as he stomped his foot. "But I want them mom!" He screamed.
"I can't give them to you! I don't have any, what the hell don't you understand?!" Lauren screamed back at him, her heart breaking as she did so.
Patron's dark brown eyes, so identical to his sister and father but they couldn't be more different, glared at his mother with tears. "You're the worst mom in the world! I have the worst life ever!" He screamed, turning back around and fast-stomping to his room. "Fuck you!"
A small gasp fell out of the redheads lips, her eyes widened as she stared at the direction her little brother went. Suddenly, a loud bang echoed through the house, establishing that Patron shut the door of his room with big force.
"What did he say?" Lauren asked in a low, dangerous voice. "Marlene, tell me he didn't say what I think I heard."
The red-headed girls eyes widened, pity shined through them as she looked at her mother. Marlene doesn't know how to respond to that, it took her by surprise. "I - uhh.. I don't know, the words w-were a bit slurred. I d-didn't understand what he s-said." She stuttered, gulping down the lump that formed in her throat. Her eyes felt ready to cry rain as she saw her Mother's angry expression, if only looks could kill. Lauren marched to her brothers room, banging the door open and making a loud sound.
Marlene let out a shaky breath, leaving straight out of the door as the screams started again. Her hands trembled, and her legs made the decision to take the way to a park near her house. She sighed in relief as she saw no one in sight, and sat down in a swing.
Her vision blurred as she finally let out the salty liquid, tears streamed down her face and she wiped them quickly, not wanting anyone to see them even if there is nobody around. This wasn't the first time something like that happened between her Mother and Brother, but the volume of screaming and her brother swearing was new to her - and for the cherry on top, she never has seen her mother look so murderous before.
The nineteen-year-old woman sniffled, wiping her nose in the back of her hand, and as she realised what she did, her features scratched up in disgust.
Marlene felt various of emotions in this particular moment. Sadness was the top of them, the redhead doesn't like the moments of when her family is fighting, no one does. Then, there is this need in the back of her mind - to go protect her brother. Not that her mother would do anything to him, she will mostly like, give him a spank in the butt for misbehaving and for using such a poor vocabulary.
The red-headed girl was vicarious with curses, as she uses them a lot when she's with her camaraderie. She would never curse in front of her parents, actually she remembers saying 'fuck' everytime she hits her little foot toe in a furniture, but her parents just chuckled. They chuckled because it was amusing, but also because the swear words never were directed to them.
However, her little brother has done it. If one word could describe Patron Castilson it would be spoiled, which Marlene sometimes envied. Her mother did everything for him, she never said no to him unlike her Father, her mother always had a soft spot for the youngest, even if she denies it. But even Lauren had favourite child, and that was her brother, she knows where to put a line limit to Patrons tantrums.
Her brother is spoiled, bratty, sexist and sometimes racist. She hates that he is like that, and Marlene hates how the quiet, sweet, gentle and kind boy he was once upon a time, is long gone. Now Patron is whiny, makes some very uncomfortable and horrible dirty jokes, has anger issues, he hits things because of his anger, he's annoying and he thinks he's better than everyone.
Marlene supports to having confidence in yourself, but when her brother is starting to brag about something while insulting the others is very, very inappropriate and unneeded.
Her tears stopped, coming to a sudden realization. She can't find any single good trait about her brother. He has so many flaws, which is understandable because they all are human, but Marlene can't find a single good thing about him. He always treated her like garbage and always manipulated her so she can give him what he wants. This is also the moment when she realised how much of a malinger he is.
Yet, Marlene always cherished him and loved him. He is her little brother, how can't she? She would be cruel if she didn't like her own brother.
The red-headed beauty wiped her tears one more time, taking a well needed breath in the progress. She looked at the sky, clasping her hands together, and closed her eyes.
She thought about her life choices, she chuckled weakly at that. Was it the right decision to stay with her mother after her parents got a divorce; She can't remember when was the last time she laughed. She can't remember when she truly felt happy in this household. She only could remember a few things living with her mother and brother.
Anger because her mother is expecting from her to be the typical popular girl in high school, like she was in her years. Perfect grades, perfect image, perfect behavior, perfect future. Envy because despite her brother not being all the above, he gets away with it - he gets a very special treatment as her mother is very fastidious in everything about him, but he doesn't get the pressure. No, all this weight comes crushing down to her because she is the older sibling.
'What a load of bullshits' she thought, scoffing in her head.
She thought hard about this, and Marlene is in conflict. She has two options so she can finally be happy. Pack some things and move in with her father - who lives alone and is economically struggling, may I add - and try to reform the bond they had two years ago when he and Lauren split up. Or stay here with her mother, who is also having economical problems and stay unhappy.
She frowned. This decision is a lot more harder that she thought it would be. Her mother is so hardworking, which means she spends most of her time in her job and not in the house, which leads to Marlene not seeing her often. Her Father Ian, is hardworking too as he has two jobs. One job is being the Co-Chief of Forks Police, along side with her maternal Uncle, Charlie Swan. And the second part time job is still a mystery to Marlene, as Ian was very secretive with his second work.
A strand of wild, rebellious red hair fell in front of her eyesight. She huffed, pushing the strand out of the way. Marlene shook her head as a sigh fell out of her dry lips. She loves her parents so much, and she doesn't have a favourite parent. But as she thinks about this problem more deeply, she discovers that she really wants to go with her father, and she feels guilty about it.
Here is her mother, who is doing anything in her will to keep them happy, but unknowingly fails on making her eldest child feel loved. She struggles with just one job, and she needs to feed three mouths, including herself. So if Marlene leaves, she would have some spare money, she will not work triple hours, and she would be around Patron more often. That's one pro, the con is that her mother doesn't even want to place a foot in Ian's house. Which is very ridiculous in the red-headed girl's opinion.
That was the moment Marlene set her mind, and no one would convince her otherwise. She will move into her fathers house in Forks, where the place is loved dearly by the redhead, and she will refill some lessons she missed before heading off to College.
A small smile appeared in her lips, she has already everything planned out. She looked at the direction of her neighborhood, and she somehow was filled with courage. An emotion she doesn't feel very often.
And so, Marlene Castilson wiped some remaining tears and picked up her crown. It's time to claim her throne back, it's time to pick herself over the other's for once.
With head held up high, she took the way back to her house. She thought of how the hell will she tell her decision to her mother. Surely, her mom wouldn't let her go, back she has no right as Marlene is already nineteen. The reason why Marlene stayed with her mother and didn't go to find her own apartment, was because she couldn't afford it. She really wanted to find a job, help a little her mother to pay the bills and then find her own home, but she couldn't find any job that was close to her current house. Which is why Marlene decided to wait longer until she finds the money, and stay with her mother.
The red-headed girl neared the familiar building, a sudden nervousness washed her but that didn't stop her from hesitating with her decision. She will do it. For herself, for her future. Marlene came to a halt as she heard laughs coming from inside her house. The brown eyed woman was puzzled, Lauren and Patron were fighting just a few moments ago.
She approached steadily inside, careful to not make any noise. She was pretty good so far, so as the voices became louder, she hide behind a wall and picked her head out to see what's happening. There stood her mother and brother laughing hysterically for some reason, her mom was telling him something and he bursted out laughing. Patron pocked their mother and the two of them started laughing again.
Marlenes heart dropped. She and her mother never interacted like that. She was lovely and strict with her, but she never laughed with her, and she never spoke jokes or anything in that matter that hasn't to do with school or proper behaviour. The thought of them laughing here without an ounce of their fight, while Marlene was outside crying and making decisions, was unbearable. They didn't even try searching for her.
The young woman cleared her throat, making the mother and son stop laughing immediately. They both looked at her, and visibly, their faces dropped. Patron looked at the floor with annoyance; While Lauren looked at her with chide. Did she do something?
"I - uh." Marlene coughed awkwardly. "I am here to make an announcement." She said, straightening her back.
Her mother sighed. "What is it?"
The redhead was mentally frowning at the sudden cold expression of her mother, but she shrugged it off. If her mother was going to be like that, well, two can play this game. With a raised eyebrow and new found confidence, Marlene smirked sarcastically at them.
"I made the decision to move in with Dad."
With those fourteen words, all hell broke loose. Her brother's head shot up sho fast, it could be considered a record. Lauren was at loss of words for a few seconds before standing up, clearly furious and insatiable with the news.
"What?! You can't be serious 'Lene -"
"- of course not, I'm Marlene -"
"-I have kept you under my roof, fed you, loved you, took care of you, and that's how you repay me?! "
"So you want me to repay you for taking care of someone you popped out of your whomp?" Marlene raised an eyebrow incredulously, feeling very hurt from her mothers words.
"Y-you." Patron stuttered. "You prefer to live with a traitor than us?!" He hissed, coming to stand closer to his older sister.
Marlene's expression turned furious. "Don't you dare call him that because you falsely think he was perfidious!" She roared at him. "You don't even know what happened you moron! You were out with the so- called - friends of yours." She shot back. She doesn't like his camaraderie, they smoke, they do drugs, they use girls as sex toys. It's disgusting.
"They are ten times better than you!"
"A-ha, even so, don't come back to me crying when you'll be ostracised from the 'group', unless you want to hear a big 'I told you so' from me!"
Patron is basically shaking from anger as he glared with intense hatred at her. But instead of throwing a comment back, the youngest Castilson did something both him and Marlene never imagined he would do. In his anger he grabbed her one arm and shook her - throwing her off guard - and pushed her back.
Marlene gasped at the sudden, painful contact her head made with the floor and groaned. Her vision blurred, and her throat tightened. She felt betrayed and most importantly hurt that her mother didn't stop him. She didn't intervene in this, and she just stood there still, watching the scene unfold with a cold mask.
"O-oh my God. Marls, I'm so sorry I -" Patron went to touch her as he kept on apologising but he was cut off by his sister pushing him away from her. Marlene crowled backwards, her normally warm brown eyes as she looked at him with a soft look once upon a time were gone, and now in their place, was the gleam of absolute betrayal, hurt and terror. She was terrified of him. He can't blame her at all, as for now, he is terrified of himself too.
"Don't touch me, get away from me." He heard her say in a broken tone. Patron was ready to cry, he feels so guilty but angry at the same time. He doesn't know what to do but, he listen to her wishes and backed hesitantly away.
Marlene stood up, and with trembling hands she put a hand in the sore place in her head. When she pulled away, she saw her hand coated in red, it was coated with blood, her blood. Her own brother hurt her physically, and she's absolutely terrified because she would never do such a thing to him. She looked at his guilty expression, and then at her mother. Lauren was frozen in place, not knowing what to do. Patron learnt his lesson before, and she will feel guilty if she spanks him one more time. But at the same time, her oldest - and least favourite - child is physically hurt. Lauren Swan doesn't know what to do.
Marlene's lower lip trembled as she stumbled to her room, throwing messily everything into the luggage she layed down in her lilac coloured bed. Her decision is confirmed, Marlene Castilson is going to Forks - and she will never come back here again. For the sake of her happiness, future and now, physical health. Then, she got a pepper spray, because her Father always told her to have one, and put it in her jean pocket.
Once her one luggage and two shoulder bags were filled with necessaries (thank goodness they were lightweight.) the red-haired beauty basically ran out of the house that held so many negative memories, and much less positive ones.
"Marlene Helen Swan, get back here this INSTANCE!" The oldest Castilson sibling heard her mother bellow.
The red-headed woman turned around, still holding comfortable the bags in her arms, and glared at her mother. Patron is stood besides Lauren, looking at her with a watery gaze that almost made Marlene want to stay. Almost.
"No." She said to her. "This would be the first time I'm going to see Dad, in a year. I'm not letting you change that, especially after tonight's events. Do you even care about me, Mom? Because sometimes I feel so unloved by you." Marlene Shook her head. "I deserve something much better than that, Mother."
Lauren was very frustrated with her daughter. The redhead always questioned her parenting from young age, and she always was rebellious against her. (Which is ironic because Patron is extremely rebellious against her yet, she doesn't see the problem.) That's why Patron is more of her favourite child, even though she shouldn't have a favourite kid as she is a Mother.
"I give you everything I can!" She screamed at her daughter.
"That's exactly what is wrong! I never wanted anything Mom! The only thing I wanted from you is for you to understand in what position I am in! I -" Marlene choked a sob. "- I wanted to feel your love. I wanted to feel loved! I did everything to understand you Mom, in what position you are in being a single Mom, taking care of two children and working triple hours to keep a roof above our heads, for us to survive! I understand all of that! But you seem to forget that you have two children and not only one! I wanted your affection, your love, I wanted you to pay attention to me!" She exclaimed.
"But you didn't." The red-haired woman whispered.
Lauren was staring at her like she was a whole other person, she doesn't understands what she supposed to be doing. She didn't even realised how much pain she caused to her eldest.
"If you leave now, never come back again." The words flew out of Lauren's mouth before she can register it. She regretted it immediately when she saw her daughter's brown eyes flashing with hurt, but as quick as it came, it vanished. Marlene was always good at acting and hiding her feelings.
Marlene couldn't believe what she's hearing. But she masked her expression of hurt and turned around forcefully, making her hair look like she flipped them as she started walking away. Just before she was out of her old house, she turned for a second to the two of them.
"Well then, I wish you two to live a perfect life. Good riddance!"