A/N: This really has no point. Just pure fluff that came up in my mind as a result of a brief visit from winter in the middle of April. Hope you'll enjoy your reading :)
Disclaimer: I don't own FMA and intend no profit.
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A loud thunder shook the room's windows, and the warm body next to him moved closer, fingers closing to a fist right over his naked chest. Normally, Roy wouldn't think about how weird it was that his lover was so much younger than him. He knew it was strange, but he didn't care that Ed was barely an adult in the law's eyes; probably because the boy had seen so much, been through so much, that numbers were meaningless and his eighteen years could have just as well been thirty had he been a normal man. However, it was in times like these that he remembered the actual age of the boy he shared his bed with, and thought how twisted it was that he didn't care he was almost half his age. No matter how tough he rendered himself, or how awfully matured his stare had been, he was still only a child looking for a shelter.
And Roy was more than happy to provide him with one.
He wrapped his arms tighter around Ed's slumber coated form, bringing him closer to him. This wasn't their first winter night together, and Roy already knew that even though he'd never admit it, the elder Elric was afraid of thunders. While he was awake he would stand still, hold himself from showing any weakness, but in his sleep all his defenses were down and his body told the truth.
Tonight, however, was different. Edward was clinging a little closer, and when another thunder roared outside the boy moved even closer, his hand clenching tighter and scratching Roy's skin in the process. Shortly after a flash of lightning followed, striking the sky and lighting Ed's face, and Roy could see the terrified expression that adorned the usually confident features. The older man frowned as he noticed certain wetness on his lover's cheek, and was torn between the urge to wake him up and hold him close, to tell him that no matter what it was he was seeing it wasn't real and couldn't hurt him, and the need to let him sleep because he knew that in that in just few hours he'll have to wake up and go to work, and he stayed up late because he found something new in his research and just couldn't leave it before he got stuck again.
But when the third thunder was heard the choice was taken from him. Ed's eyes were clenched tighter and his fist hit Roy's chest once; it wasn't hard enough to bruise, but hurt nonetheless. Ed wasn't a weak man, to say the least; when wide awake he could probably take Roy down in a fight, and in his sleepy haze he was still rather strong. "Al…" he heard him murmur, and immediately the dark haired man knew that even if Ed really did need every minute of precious sleep he was getting, it would be worth nothing if he lets him sink in nightmares.
Roy's hand moved to hold on Ed's wrist; not so much because he minded the younger man hitting him, but because he wanted to wake him up. "Ed, wake up," he asked, making sure his voice was soft but demanding – not too rough so he wouldn't make Ed feel worse, but still fierce enough that the boy would listen. It worked; golden eyes flashed open and their terrified stare was set on Roy. He didn't seem to understand that whatever frightened him so much was only a storm far behind the closed window, or that he was safe in the warm bed, in Roy's arms; but he was awake. He blinked once, and the older man could feel a tear dropping on his shoulder after it finished its travel down his lover's face.
"Ed… it's alright," he found himself mumbling as he patted the smaller man's back with one arm, while his other hand reached to wipe the tear off Ed's face. "It was only a dream."
The younger man shook his head once and moved even closer, pushing Roy's body backwards with his urge to be closer. He buried his face in his collarbone. "No… it isn't… it's all my fault…" he murmured, his voice silent, almost a whisper. Roy could still hear him clearly enough, even though it was masked with hoarseness from sleeping and only barely audible, muffled by his own skin.
Roy let out a sigh. Not because he was annoyed, or because he thought Ed was being troublesome, but because he was already too familiar with this scenario and felt sorry his lover had to go through this almost every night and there wasn't much he could do to help him. "Ed… Ed, look at me," he whispered, using the hand that a moment ago brushed against the younger man cheeks to lift his face up, forcing him to follow his gentle order. "It was only a nightmare."
The ember irises looked at him, moving almost frantically from right to left as Ed scanned him. Roy looked for any kind of signs that the younger man was aware enough to understand what he was being told, and he was just about to say something more when the blond blinked and his pupils went wide for a second before returning to their natural size. "I know," he mumbled, his voice, even though not covered with sleep anymore, was still a little hoarse, and was now adorned with thin lines of embarrassment. "I know it was," he repeated, but even though he tried to still present himself as tough through his words, his body betrayed him and told the truth; he was still clinging onto Roy, and he lowered his face to be buried in Roy's neck .
"It's okay, Ed," said the older man in a soothing voice, allowing his hand to stroke Ed's golden hair. "It's only me here, you don't have to be ashamed or scared. I know…" he let out a sigh as he recalled his own nightmares. They were very rare by now, but he still remembered with awful clarity the times after the war when he'd wake up covered in sweat and his hand ready to click its fingers and ignite the flame that he used to kill the Ishvals. So many innocent people have found their death at his fire, and it still haunted him, even now, so many years after. He swallowed, releasing the hold he didn't realize he had on Ed's hair. "I know what it's like, and I know how hard it is to dwell alone in these memories. You know you can always tell me anything, right?"
There was silence lying between them for a moment, and Roy was about to give up on helping Ed any farther when the younger man spoke again. "I dreamt about that night again," he murmured, almost too quietly for Roy to actually hear him; but in the tranquility of the room he could almost hear their hearts beating in their chests. "Only this time… I wasn't able to attach Al's soul to that armor. I lost him…" his voice died, muffled by a silent sob and Roy's skin. The dark haired man felt his neck becoming wet with Ed's tears, and he felt his heart clench inside him at the thought of Ed crying, and at the same time he felt warmth spreading through him at the knowledge that he felt comfortable enough in his presence to show his weaknesses. Fullmetal was strong and proud; in the outside world, he won't let anyone see him scared or hurt. He'd keep everything inside to deal with later, when he was alone.
But not anymore. Not since Roy decided he's had enough pretending, and asked his former subordinate out on a date the moment he handed his pocket watch back. It was a long shot, with such a slight chance to succeed, but Roy didn't mind it back then. He waited too long, watching the broken child amend and grow in front of his eyes. Watched him as he went through the tough and confusing years of being a teenager, being forced by circumstances to be much older than his age, and knowing that it must be even tougher for him than for anyone else, simply because of the burden he was forced to carry. Words couldn't describe the shock that hit Roy when Ed said yes, actually agreeing to go on a date with him. It started out awkward; they sat at the restaurant, both quiet and at loss of words, and Roy thought it was all a very bad idea, hating himself for thinking it could work. But then the night was over and Roy drove Ed to the apartment he and Al rented the week before, and just as they bid their goodbye the blond stayed in the car a moment longer, frowning and looking like all he wanted to do was punch him in the face. Roy didn't think he deserved to be punched, but he waited anyway without saying a word and was ready to defend himself when Fullmetal finally moved towards him with a determined expression and kissed him. That moment, the first second their lips ever touched each other, was well burnt into Roy's memories. He remembered the shock that went through him, paralyzing him for a second; he could remember how chapped Ed's lips, their awkwardness against his own; it was just as though back then, but now he knew he was the boy's first kiss. He could clearly remember how he tasted that day, after he'd eaten buttered beef and mashed potatoes, and he could still remember the lingering tang of the red wine he'd drunk colliding with the white wine Roy chose to drink that night, all of that mixed with the peculiar taste that now Roy knew was Ed, and with time he got addicted to it. That kiss didn't last for long, and when it ended it left them both in even heavier awkwardness, and again it was Ed who broke it. Roy still remembered his exact words: how 'bout I see you again next week? Roy couldn't do much other than nodding, and Ed beamed his bright grin at him, and without any additional words, left the car.
Roy tore himself from that sweet memory. They eventually met before the next week arrived, and that second night already ended at Roy's place, but all of that happened over a year ago. It took them both time to open up, but now there were no boundaries anymore; brick by brick they disassembled the dam between them until there was nothing left of it. He looked down, and kissed his lover's head softly. "But that's not what happened," he said quietly. "You did it. You brought your brother back, and then gave him his body back. He's right now in Resenbool with Winry, enjoying the life he has thanks to you. Ed, look at me," he paused, waiting for the ember eyes to open and watch him. "That's the reality. That, and me."
"I know," Ed answered, his voice sounding, like it always did when he woke up from his nightmares and Roy led him out of the horrible alternate reality his mind created, defensive. He seemed to want to say something more, but another thunder shook the window and silenced him. Now, when he was completely awake, he didn't cling onto Roy like he did when he was slumber coated, trying to ignore it and portray himself braver. But the slight movement of Roy's body proved otherwise. The older man held him tighter, but other than that did nothing to let Ed know he noticed his fright. "Thank you," Roy heard the faint mumble, and knew that Ed meant to thank him not only for comforting him about the dream; but also for not pointing out how scared he was by the storm messing outside the window, and for being there with him, even when it seemed impossible.
Roy smiled, and lifted Ed's face a little bit higher. He met no resistance, and closed the distance, placing a soft, loving kiss on the lips that were already waiting for him. Ed opened his mouth slightly, but Roy didn't deepen the kiss, only lingered for a short moment before he moved away. "You're most welcome, Ed. Do you feel better now?"
"I didn't feel bad before." The obvious lie was told, again, in a defensive tone, immature and stubborn like only Ed could be without actually being childish, and Roy let out a short, quiet chuckle.
"Of course you didn't. Let's go back to sleep now?"
Ed scowled at him before moving a little, probably just making himself comfortable again; but despite his use of harsh tone the tension between them eased, the atmosphere no longer filled with the darkness of Ed's nightmare. "Why were you awake anyway? You sleep like a baby."
The dark haired man smiled again. "I was watching over you," he said. Truth was, when Ed went to bed Roy was already there, but he couldn't fall asleep. He had these nights, when no matter how long he lay in his comfortable bed, even with Ed by his side, he simply won't be able to let go and drift away. He had no idea why, and simply assumed it had something to do with his stressful work and the occasional naps he'd steal when alone in his office for too long. It didn't bother him; he'd be tired the next day, but would fall asleep easily the following night. Ed was aware of it, and recommended him to see a doctor about it, but he always dismissed him, telling him it didn't matter and didn't interfere with his everyday life.
"Creepy pervert." Ed's lips moved against Roy's neck as he talked and moved closer, sealing his words with a soft kiss on the older man's sensitive skin, making him let out a soft moan at the tingling sensation.
"Of course," Roy answered, not caring enough to answer his lover's insult. He knew that no matter how many times Ed would call him that – or any of the other not-so-pet names he tended to use – he loved him, and appreciated the fact that Roy loved him too. He knew that if needed, he'd defend their relationship and Roy's decision to date his former subordinate and punch anyone who claimed it was wrong. Suddenly, heavy tiredness fell on him. He wasn't sure if it was Ed's breathing that calmly brushed his skin, or the toll of being concerned about Ed, or if it was just the hour; but he was getting sleepier by the second, and his eyelids seemed too heavy to keep from falling over his eyes. "Good night, Ed."
"Mmm-hmm," was the only answer he received.
Outside, the storm seemed to be finally calming down. The clouds didn't seem angry enough toforce out any more thunders, and the rain became weaker as they drifted into sleep.
A/N: Thanks for reading! A review with your thoughts would be nice :)