I LOVE the smell of green

by John 'Doc' Holliday

This is the military tale and autobiography of everyone's favorite hard ass sergeant major. Avery Johnson. It picks up at his first duty station and will end where everyone knows his tale comes to a close. Or will it? This is only rated M in case the violence gets too graphic. It shouldn't get worse than T. oh and M for minor adult themes. THIS is Sergeant Johnson we're talkin bout

1. He knows what the ladies like

He Knows What the Ladies Like

The first half of the first chapter is going to be diary style, and set right before that f* $!n Guilty Spark lased him. The second half starts with his intro to the UNSC in the colonial rebellions. So please bear with me. Anyway enjoy, tell your friends, and DO drop a review makes me feel appreciated, that I'm actually doing something right or wrong. For now ~ Holliday.

If you told the younger me, Private First Class Avery Junior Wet Behind The Ears Rookie Johnson that I would turn into bad ass Sergeant Major Avery Junior Blow The Hell Out Of Your Alien Ass Johnson. I would have called you a damn liar and spat in your face. But here I am about to lead a charge into one scary ass alien artifact. I guess y'all are wondering how I got from there to here. Well it's a long story that I guess you deserve to hear, so here goes. – Johnson.

"Avery are you coming or not?" My good friend Corporal Andrew Wheeler asked.

"Yeah boy I got us a Warthog from stores. One of them new crew transport ones." Sergeant Matthew Linx, our friend by night, our boss by day.

"I'm coming, I just got to finish cleaning this new MA5B. These put the sexy in assault rifles." I whined, Yeah I really did whine as a little kid.

"Awwww…. You can do that later Marine, I, as your sergeant, clear you of maintenance routines. So pick up your ass and let's go Johnson." Linx barked.

"Besides AJ, you can't cuddle with an AR." Wheeler gave me one of those knowing winks. Man that guy is really rough around the edges.

[Thirty minutes later, at the Rusty Tankard, a real dirty bar with real bad beer.]

Some burly redneck belched, and yelled "Hey Necko (the lady who owned this 'fine establishment') I ordered horse piss, not cow piss!" There have been a lot of rude comment about the taste of the beer.

I glare morosely at my stein still nearly full, it does taste like piss, smells like it too. The beer's expensive, tastes like shit, the music is hick and way too loud, the place smells and looks like a barn. Nothing good about this leave… Whoa hey now who are those fine things? Three Beeeuatiful young ladies just walked in all three wearing matching tank tops and Daisy Dukes, I wonder how that nickname got started anyhow. Nothing seemed to missing from these girls except, except me…

Andy spoke up, "I see you looking AJ, you ain't going to be able to get them chicks man, so just give it up."

Linx winked, "Andy, just give the boy a chance to crash in burn. How you gonna do this son?"

I just look up and grin from ear to ear, "I know what the ladies like."

To be continued next chapter.