title: porcelain doll
summary: He still thinks she's beautiful, but he pleads for her to break.
pairing: armin & annie
setting: in canon
notes: this pairing is ruining my life. and I'm about to contribute. cheers to that.
disclaimer: I own nothing.
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this one's for the torn down,
the experts at the fall
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He stands and he watches her. Her periwinkle eyes are closed in what seems to everyone to be an eternal sleep. She does not wake. She is the Sleeping Beauty of the Survey Corps – beautiful, but dangerous.
She's killed their comrades. She tried to kidnap what is considered humanity's last hope.
And when she was finally caught, she imprisoned herself within something beautiful but dark. She is one who sleeps forever and ever, or so it seems. She rests inside her crystal bed, and he can't help but think – it's the same color as her eyes.
Armin Arlet is not a knight in shining armor. He is not a handsome prince or noble from one of his fairy tale books. He is not here to rescue her – although he wishes he could. He aches for her to be alright. He dreams that none of this ever happened.
But it did.
Annie Leonhardt is strong, just like the crystal shield encasing her – protecting her from any harm that anyone may try to inflict on her. But to Armin, she is like a porcelain doll – not as strong as she seems. Beautiful, but inevitably breakable in the end. Part of him hates it, and as he stands and observes her from outside her crystal castle, he clenches his fists.
"Annie, you need to come out."
No response.
Her eyes are still closed and he assumes she is still asleep. They haven't determined yet if she can hear them beyond all that hardened rock – if she's really actually awake under there.
"Annie, you have to take responsibility for what you did."
She looks peaceful, for the first time. She never looked like this back in their training days. Part of him longs to see her smile. He thinks she would have a beautiful smile.
"Annie, come on."
She spared him, and her reasons have haunted him ever since. She didn't kill him when she could have, she let him live. But why? He questions himself every day. Why me? Why am I so important? He's not, he knows. Not really.
So it begs the question of why she would do such a thing, and it's always there in the back of his mind.
"Annie please."
There's a bit of poetic irony here somewhere, he knows. He thinks she's beautiful and he wants to save her, and yet, here he is begging her to give up. She's a porcelain doll made of glass and he's pleading for her to break.
He doesn't want to hurt her – he just wants to know. Why she did what she did, why she spared his life, what her objective is, how many more Titan shifters are disguised and living in the walls.
He wants to know, and he still wants to save her somehow.
Armin stares at her from the other side of the glass. He places a hand on her defense against the outside world, and stares inside. It's like her own little private kingdom – and she's the queen. No one can touch her in there. It's a twisted fairy tale that's backwards and all wrong and he cannot reach her.
So what does it matter anymore?
"What if I was to tell you that I love you? Would you come out then?" he questions, staring intently at her closed eyelids – waiting for any sign of movement.
There is none.
Not a twitch of her eye nor a flutter of her long lashes against her pale cheek.
"Because I do, Annie. So come out. Come home."
Where is home, exactly? He asks himself.
Not within these walls.
He answers back, and in his mind he pictures a home by the sea. Where there are no Titans.
"We'll figure something out, just…don't stay in there any longer."
Why does he still believe in her, after all this time? After all she's done?
Because he still wants to believe in himself. He wants to believe that there is good in everyone. He knows. He knows and he doesn't want it to be any other way.
Their world is horrible – dark and cruel and beautiful – and they are just victims of circumstance. They're still children – she and him. He doesn't want to believe she is the enemy – enemy, he hates that word – he still wants to hang on to his hopes and dreams. His aspirations.
That she is not bad. That he is still good, because if she is his enemy and he wants to save her, then what does that make him?
"Annie," his voice breaks, "am I a good person?"
She is a queen trapped inside her own castle – a sleeping beauty who does not wake – so of course she does not answer.
Hanji walks in, and for the world looks like she does not wish to disturb him. "Armin, it's time to go now."
He nods in understanding and turns to follow her out. When they've almost reached the door, he hears it.
Her voice.
It sounds far, far away, like she's speaking to him from her crystal kingdom but that isn't possible –
"You are."
He stops in his tracks and turns back to her.
She is still there, asleep and never waking, a porcelain fairy tale that does not shatter.
Armin swallows, and turns back to Hanji, who is waiting for him at the door.
"Did you hear that?"
She blinks. "No. What?"
His heart drops.
Annie doesn't wake up.
