Starting a new multi-chapter fic is a bad idea but hey-ho I'm going to do it anyway! Someone somewhere has probably already done this, but I like the idea to much to let that stop me.
Trying to concentrate on her paperwork when it was getting darker and she was tired and irritable was hard enough, but Jane was on a mission, it seemed to make it even harder. He was humming and muttering some old track loudly with his hands situated behind his head as he laid the length of his couch.
The rest of the FBI agents were packing up for the day, mainly milling around and chatting with their co-workers before heading home for the evening.
Teresa Lisbon gave Jane a pointed stare, but his eyes were lightly closed, fluttering as he murmured lyrics breathily. She cocked her head, looking at how peaceful he looked, she almost felt bad for what she was about to do, but not bad enough. Lisbon pushed away from her desk as discreetly as possible to free her legs without drawing his attention before aiming an aggressive kick at the dark leather couch.
Jane grunted indignantly and turned onto his side, facing the back of the sofa, his right arm hung limply over the end of it at a weird angle. Lisbon waited to see if he would dare. Sure enough, he did, he begun to hum and murmur once more. It might have just been Lisbon's imagination and irritable state but she was almost convinced he was being even louder now.
She clenched her teeth, very nearly growling aloud. Jane was deliberately winding her up, as per usual. Lisbon lifted her foot and gave him a firm sharp stab to the lower back. She was oblivious to the amused looks a number of their colleagues were giving her and Jane.
Jane grunted again, waving her away with a weak hand gesture.
"I know you know exactly what you're doing Jane!" Lisbon hissed, "Can't you go be a pain in someone else's arse for once? Why did you have to move the couch over here?"
"Gets more light," Jane explained with a tired sigh, still not facing her.
Lisbon scanned area of the bullpen quickly, her eyes resting on the couch's previous home that was perhaps 5 or 6 yards. Personally, she could see no difference in the amount of light in comparison with the couch's newly allocated patch of floor.
"Just be quiet if you're not going to be helpful." Lisbon said with a heavy exhale, going back to her paperwork, spinning a biro in her hand.
Jane huffed, sitting up dozily. His waistcoat was undone and his hair mussed up in a mess of fair curls. He rubbed a sleepy eye like an overgrown toddler. He looked innocent and almost sweet, and Lisbon smiled despite herself.
That didn't last long though. Lisbon's face fell and she looked ready to murder him and dump the remains when he leant over her, breathing down her neck.
"What case?"
"The Gerard case." Lisbon replied shortly. They had just finished working on the murder of a 27 year old female state employee who had died seemingly in a struggle to protect a stack of top secret files.
"That's irrelevant; I wouldn't bother with that bit." Jane pointed to a section of Lisbon's report.
"I have to put it in Jane." Lisbon clenched her fist, "That's my job."
"Well I think that's stupid." Jane said, buttoning up his waistcoat.
"It's protocol, of course you'd think it's stupid." Lisbon smiled, shaking her head slowly, starting to write on the report form once more.
Jane responded with a non-committal noise as he moved to stand beside her, even he couldn't argue with that. "You should-"
Lisbon cut him off, "Stop it, you're making me edgy!"
"I make you edgy?" Jane sniggered.
Lisbon gritted her teeth, though she wasn't really annoyed, she sucked in a breath, nodding slightly, "Honestly… yes!"
"I knew that. I bet sometimes you can't relax for hours after I've messed with you." Jane nodded seemingly apologetically.
This was a change. What was he up to? "Yes actually." Lisbon said cautiously.
"You're very tolerant to have dealt with it for over a decade."
Teresa Lisbon stared at Jane as if he had grown a third eye, "Yes."
"I bet just thinking about the way I make you feel has you lying awake at night." Jane said completely seriously.
"Yes!" Lisbon agreed before she could think, "Wait, what?"
Jane broke his cool façade and burst with snickers, his face stretching into a wide open shining grin. His eyes tightly closed as he shook with laughter.
Lisbon punched him in the arm solidly, her face slightly flushed as she tried not to convey how embarrassed she was, "Don't put words in my mouth." She growled.
"Lisbon, Jane." Abbott's voice sounded, carrying across the bullpen, they turned their heads in unison to face him.
"My office, right now." He ordered before striding away.
Jane and Lisbon shared a look. Jane raised an inquisitive brow at her as if to say 'what's this about I wonder', to which she responded with a cock of the head, 'let's go find out'. She jumped into action and set off on a path to Abbott's office with Jane following at a leisurely pace.
Once they were settled opposite Abbott with the office door closed he began, "Ever heard of Stone Brothers?"
"That's the gang in Houston started by Daniel and Dean Stone sometime in the early 70's?" Lisbon nodded, recalling all she could about the criminal.
"The word gang perhaps not quite suiting these guys," Abbott placed two shots of well-dressed clean-shaven men in their early 50s in front of Jane and Lisbon, "They served in the US military in their late teens, these guys are trained killers. Trading in drugs, information, stolen goods." Abbott tapped the photos, "They're too careful. They've got enough money and power to get others to do the dirty work for them. They have influences reaching half-way across the globe, if not further. These guys are not thugs, at least they don't so. They like to think of themselves as gentlemen."
"Intelligent gangsters," Jane smiled, "I bet they've got the Houston police wrapped around their little finger, haven't they? Big guys in the federal government are losing control." Shooting Abbott a look he knew would annoying him. Abbott stared right back.
Lisbon rolled her eyes, "With all due respect sir, why are you telling us this?"
Abbot broke the cold stare he was giving Jane, "I'm getting to that," He placed another two photos under the first two, "Both the brothers have a number of illegitimate children but these two are the sons of Dean Stone. Cal and Nick Stone, Cal's the older brother."
Jane picked up Cal's photo and squinted, "Indulged as a child, a bully, petulant, malicious and selfish he lives off his father's money and security. Never married. Never had a committed relationship. But his brother…" Jane picked up the image of Nick, "Bullied by his brother. Insecure but intelligent. Scared of his own family. Introverted. Isolated."
"He's a hacker. Used to be a 'Hacktivist'. Released some sensitive government information as a teenager but there was never enough evidence to take him to trial. He isn't a public as his brother, no flashy parties, no criminal record because we've never had anything on him. He's the weak link. He's you're target."
"Like a pack of wolves going after the smallest bison." Jane commented.
"Wait..?" Lisbon leant forward, "'OUR' target?" She pointed from Jane to herself.
"We need Jane and yourself to go undercover." Abbott stated.
Lisbon's eyes widened, then squinted, "You're kidding?"
"I don't kid Agent."
"Jane's a liability at the best of times! How am I meant to control him out in the field?" Lisbon lamented.
"Liability? Control me? Ouch." Jane feigned mock hurt.
Abbott held up his hands, "Jane's not an agent," He began.
"Exactly!" Lisbon exclaimed.
"This is what will sell it. Lisbon, you've got the whole demeanor of a law enforcement officer, except when you're with Jane. And Jane nowhere near seems like he could possibly be working for law enforcement. Not to mention his ability to get anything he wants out of anyone he wants."
"But sir, he's a civilian. He's not trained."
"At this point Lisbon with two failed undercover missions and a seriously close call with an infiltration team two years ago, the regional and federal government are willing to try anything."
"Why us?" Jane asked.
"There's got to be a better option than us?"
"You're better qualified than you think for this. I read both your files before coming to a decision. Jane, you already managed to pull off faking a breakdown and, Lisbon, your death, if I recall correctly. I know you'll be able to sell the story convincingly. Jane, like I said, can get valuable information without even asking questions. You two are our best bet." Abbott concluded. Taking a small silver key out of his breast pocket he unlocked his top desk draw. Pulling out two large envelopes, he gave one to each of them.
"What about the stuff about Red John? Past cases in California? Anyone with Wi-Fi can find out who we are."
"That's been taken care of." Abbott reassured them, "Now, these are highly sensitive documents. They go missing and there's no mission. Learn every tiny detail, do not open the file in public, and do not lose it! Doing so will earn you a extensive suspension. You have a week to prepare. Your briefing is first thing Wednesday morning. Don't be late." That last part was undoubtedly pointed at Jane.
"Sir, I really think…" Lisbon began to protest again.
"You may go now Agent." Abbott interrupted.
Lisbon grudgingly got up and followed Jane out the office clutching her envelope. She reached her desk and dropped it onto it with a huff. That's when she heard the unmistakable sound of paper being torn. Her head snapped round to where Jane was now flicking through the contents of his envelope.
"Hey," Lisbon hissed, "Jane! That's top secret. Put it away."
"Meh," was Jane's only acknowledgment that she had even spoken, "Not sure I like my name. Do I look like a Harry Tyne to you?"
"There are people around."
"They're FBI as well, what does it matter?" Jane didn't even look up and continued to leisurely skim read the sensitive file as though it was the morning news.
Great, Lisbon thought, it's not even been five minutes and he's already breaking protocol, "It just matters okay Jane. What if one of them is dirty?"
"They're not." Jane said unswerving.
"How do you know?" Lisbon leaned over and swiped the file from Jane's hand. Jane protested, but then his eyes fell on her envelope. Teresa tried to snatch it before he could but he was too fast.
"Now you're going to get both of us suspended." Lisbon didn't have the energy to try and snatch this file off him as well, and it would only draw the attention of the last few agents milling around to the both of them.
Jane opened the brown packaging like a child opening a present on Christmas. Slipping the file out, he read the first load of information, and said factually, "Oh look. We're married."
Lisbon's eyes widened, tugging the papers her was holding into her eye line, she read 'Elizabeth (Lily) Tyne'.
"Well this just keeps getting better doesn't it." She said exasperatedly, wondering why the idea of pretending to be married to Jane, though it made her uncomfortable, she couldn't bring herself to hate.
'I know you'll be able to sell the story convincingly' was what Abbott had said. Lisbon couldn't help but wonder now what he's meant by that.
Drop me a review if you want me to continue. I don't think I'll bother if there's not enough interest. Thanks a bunch for reading!