Allen stood there, unable to move as he watched the snow become a dark shade of crimson. His mind refused to make the connection between the blood soaked snow and his fallen companion. He stumbled forward as time seemed to stand still, dropping to his knees next to his fellow exorcist. His eyes glistened with tears that refused to fall as he brushed back Lavi's bangs.

"Don't.." Lavi began, snapping Allen back to Earth. "Don't ah.. don't cry, beansprout" he continued and grimaced, still clutching his side. Allen couldn't contain his cries as his silver eyes met one emerald one. Lavi leaned into Allen's hand and pressed his lips to the pale skin. Tears rolled down the cheeks of the white haired exorcist as a steady pace as he gently lifted Lavi into his arms. Lavi tried to protest, but he couldn't seem to closed his eyes and tried to focus on anything but the constant pain in his side.

Lavi's thoughts drifted back to when he first saw Allen.

The younger exorcist looked like a fallen angel lying on the bed, his white hair strewn around his head like a halo. As Lavi fought back the urge to caress his pale skin, Allen stirred in his sleep before letting out a sigh; the small boy relaxed again and a small smile graced his lips. As soon as he saw that smile, he felt the need to protect this boy who seemed so vulnerable laying there.

He had never been one to believe in fate. Hell, he had didn't even believe in the possibility of a god. Being a bookman had granted him access to see first hand all the senseless wars and complete disregard for human life to believe in the notion of a higher power

With every soft rise and fall of the small exorcist's chest, he felt himself giving into the idea of destiny. If there was a reason he had innocence, if there was a reason he was an exorcist,it was this boy. He sat down with a loud thud, his legs unable to support him any longer.

He can't get attached to anyone

Couldn't

But here he is, sitting here, watching this person he had never even spoken to sleep. After seeing him, Lavi couldn't imagine being without him. He wanted to be there for every smile, every laugh, be there to dry his tears and pick him up when he was hurt. Lavi felt an uncontrollable urge to protect this boy, even to lay his life on the line to save him if needed. H e roughly palmed his eye, trying to knock some sense into himself.

A bookman has no need for a heart.

The words echoed in his in mind, and his heart felt like it would beat through his chest. When he got up to leave, he turned as he was about to walk through the doorway. Allen was staring at him, his unbandaged eye looking him over. Lavi's heartbeat fluttered as a pale iris met his emerald one.

He cried out as Allen re-adjusted him, the pain in his side bringing him back to reality . "Lavi? Lavi!" an angelic voice called out." Stay awake, please oh please stay awake. It's gonna be okay, everything will be okay.." Hearing the voice made him forget about his pain, and he fought to stay awake for Allen, but soon darkness came over him again.

This memory was different. It didn't directly involve Allen

He was in the library, mindlessly organizing books. His mind was far from the books in his arms. A flush creeped up his neck as his thoughts drifted to a not too distant memory.

They had ended up on the couch in Lavi's room. The smaller exorcist had snuck over in the middle of the night and woke Lavi, saying he needed to talk. The two had been standing while Allen struggled to form his thoughts into words.

"Lavi.." he began, and the pink tint on his cheeks wasn't hard to see when Allen suddenly closed the distance between the two, their lips coming together in an urgent kiss. Lavi's head was spinning, and he was half convinced he was still dreaming. The redhead lost his balance and fell onto the couch, pulling Allen down to straddle his lap. The two continued pouring all their emotions into the kiss.

They had kissed before, in stolen moments in the library or in an empty corridor, but it had never been like this, Lavi noted. Allen broke the kiss to pull at the bottom of Lavi's shirt, slowly pulling it over his head, Lavi followed suit, and tossed Allen's to the floor before turning his attention to his neck. He trailed light kisses down the sensitive skin, and bit down harshly just above his collar bone, causing him to cry out. The small moans that escaped Allen's mouth urged him on as his hands tangled in Lavi's red locks, pulling him against him. Without thinking about it, the smaller exorcist began moving his hips against Lavi, causing both of them to let out low a few minutes of of the slow grinding, Allen felt brave enough to let his hands venture from Lavi's hair down his chest and across the toned muscles of his stomach. He hesitated for a moment, unsure of how far this would go. Lavi brought his lips back to Allen's, and this was all the encouragement he need to begin to untie lavi's pyjama pants, fumbling for a moment before getting the strings undone. "Allen?" Lavi asked, and he looked up to meet his eyes. Lavi raised a hand to cup the side of his face. "I love you." he said, and his heart just about stopped when Allen flashed him his unbelieveable smile. "I love you too, Lavi"

"Lavi! Why are you just standing there like a fool?" Bookman senior called before tossing a book at his apprentice, causing Lavi to drop the stack of books in his arms.

"Look what you made me do you old panda!" He shouted back, more angry at being pulled out of his day dreaming than getting hit.

"Maybe if you weren't so distracted lately, you would've ducked!"

Lavi stood in silence,having to argument against that. He had been very distracted lately, but he didn't think anyone would notice. He bend down to pick up the books he dropped, when suddenly there was a reassuring hand on his shoulder.

"A bookman has no need for a heart, Lavi." Bookman Sr. said, and Lavi sighed. The familiar mantra had been bouncing around in his head ever since he confessed his love to Allen.

"I know that."

"Which is why.." he said, his voice full of remorse. The old man cleared his throat. "Which is why you are relieved of your duties. I will leave the exorcist headquarters tomorrow and search for my new student to take over my duties." He said, this time betraying no emotion.

Lavi froze. Him? Not a bookman?

He knew he should be falling apart, he had been learning the ways of a bookman for as long as he could remember, but he couldn't keep the smile from gracing his face.

He could be with Allen. He didn't have to hide his feelings from the world.

He could be Allen's. Really, truly, belong to him. He had always been Allen's, but now he could completely give himself to him, knowing he would never have to leave.

He stood up, and his former teacher gave him an understanding smile.

Lavi suddenly realized he was no longer moving. The pain in his side suddenly intensified and he let out a choked scream. "Shh, Lavi, it's gonna be okay. We're in a hospital."