A Call Your Name (SnK OST) songfic series
A/N: Not spoiler-free. This is my first fanfic, ever. And I have yet to get my own writer's feel/style. Constructive criticism is very welcome! And yes, I am half-expecting this to happen to Eren. ;-;
It was utter hell, a bloody pandemonium. Soldiers bled and writhed in pain while Titans chased after them like wild, rabid animals closing in on their prey. "We don't know what's wrong tonight. Everybody's got no place to hide." To be treated like caged incests, to be powerless, the harsh reality came crashing down. Eren and Mikasa were forced to watch Hannes, who sacrificed his life to protect them, being torn apart right before their eyes by the Titan who killed their mother. With clenched fists, Eren punched the ground, laughed and shouted like a mad man, "You can't do anything, you worthless piece of crap! Nothing at all! Mother, I still couldn't do anything!" Beads of tears started forming around the rims of his eyes. He hated his powerlessness, and it frustrated him to no end.
"Eren."
His trance was broken. Turning to Mikasa, he realized he was already shedding tears. What a big crybaby I am. But he did not attempt to wipe them away. She smiled at him, "That's not true." Silence fell upon both of them in the midst of the raging tempest. The two of them paused, unmindful of the Titans and turmoil around them. It was as if time stopped.
After a moment of silence, Mikasa continued, "Eren, listen. There's something I want to tell you." He just quietly sat and listened. "Thank you for being together with me. Thank you for teaching me how to live." Surrounding Titans and fellow soldiers continued ripping each other apart, flesh from flesh and bone from bone.
"And, lastly… Thank you for wrapping this scarf around me," her eyes glistening with joy and tears. Eren couldn't do anything but just stare at her wide-eyed. Aside from Titans, there's one more thing that Eren hated with passion, and it was seeing Mikasa cry. It was also his fault this time. He, while gritting his teeth, clenched his fist tightly, spun around, stood up and glanced at her from the corner of his eye.
"Something like that… I'll wrap it as many times as I need to. From now on, as well!"
Eren, raising his fist, turned to face the insatiable Titan up front. As rage flooded his whole being, he roared and slammed his fist into the Titan's monstrous palm with all his might. Into the same dirty hand that gripped and crushed his mother.
"Die, motherfucker!"
I want to see and understand the world outside. I don't want to die inside these walls without knowing what's out there!
"I'm crying
Missing my lover
I don't have the power
On my side forever
Oh, where is my lover?
I got no power
I'm standing alone, no way
Calling out your name."
A dream? Why am I dreaming about the past?
The battle of old has finally ended and mankind has emerged victorious. The Titans are no more. Humanity is now enjoying true peace for the first time in history. There was no longer any need to build, let alone, hide behind walls. If only I could enjoy this with him.
Mikasa was in a daze, for she was roused rather rudely from her sleep by the loud howl of a strong gale. Looking around, she found herself having slept under the same tree in the Shiganshina District where Eren slept and awoke teary-eyed, fourteen years ago. "Darn it, I fell asleep. I still need to visit him. I shouldn't be lazing around."
"Mikasa!" A familiar voice interrupted her train of thought.
"Armin."
A taller and more mature-looking Armin ran toward her direction. "I was looking for you," he gasped between words. "Where have you been? Aren't you going to visit him? Today's his first anniversary, you know! We need to hurry before it gets dark." He smiled dryly and peered at Mikasa. She stood up and dusted herself. "Sorry. I fell asleep. I was strangely tired." She replied with a wry smile. "Let's go buy flowers then."
Armin gave her a silent nod. "I hope it doesn't rain today."
I couldn't do anything to protect you, Eren.
Erwin Smith, Levi and Eren Jaeger were summoned to the capital, and the Military Police escorted them into Wall Sina. A grim and silent atmosphere pierced the carriage, and it was rather making everyone uncomfortable. "Eren." The commander spoke, breaking the silence. "I'd like to apologize. I failed to convince the brass to consider letting you live. Seems like the cards aren't in my hands this time," his eyes, sorrowful and sympathetic. Eren hung his face and forced a smile, "It's alright, Commander. From the very start, I was already prepared to die. Every soldier knows that."
Levi was silent. He'd rather not speak at all, because if he did in this situation, he knew that every word that will be coming out his mouth will be utter profanity.
The carriage halts to a stop. The commander got off, with the corporal and Eren following suit. Two soldiers from the Military Police approached them and saluted. "We're here to escort Eren Jaeger to the stand." And he was led away.
Both of them followed the officers.
"Levi."
"What is it, Erwin?"
The older man raises his face, eyes focused on the sky above and grips Levi's right shoulder. "It's not your fault. No one is at fault. Don't be hard on yourself." Levi's frown deepened and clicked his tongue irritably, "Easier said than done, Erwin. I couldn't stop them."
People, who can't throw something important away, can never hope to change anything.
Eren has his hands bound to a thick wooden stand. The firing squad was already prepared, ready to fire any minute now. The highest officials from the land, the military, including their respective commanders, curious civilians and, especially the 104th Scouting Legion, Eren's comrades were there, seated as spectators in the execution stand. It was rather uncannily silent. Eren's eyes quickly searched the crowd for everyone he recognized. He knew he wouldn't be here 'till long and wanted to communicate in his last moments.
He wanted look at their face and quietly nod. Commander Pixis, Commander Erwin, Corporal Levi, Erd, Gunther, Auruo, Petra, Squad Leader Hanji, Jean, Connie, Sasha, Annie, Historia, Armin, Mikasa, Father and Mother. And several others who died for humanity's cause. These are the people that have lent me their strength that I was able to go the distance, to have been able to reach this far. Tears started to formed beads at the rims of his eyes.
"Men, ready!" Commander Nile ordered. "Take aim!" The loading and clicking of rifles reverberated in the quiet hush of the crowd.
"Fire!"
Humanity dreams of a world free of Titans, and in order to fulfill that dream, one final sacrifice must be made. Eren Jaeger, the last Titan standing, slowly closed his eyes.
The sound of rifle shots ripped through the air.
"Hey, Eren. It's been a year, huh," Armin said while tapping Eren's tombstone. "We brought flowers!" He placed the bouquet of white roses on the ground. "The weather's nice today, isn't it? Mikasa's also with me today." Mikasa slowly approached the grave and whispered, "Eren," then brushed the top of the tombstone with her hand.
A moment later, she was already trembling. "Eren, I miss you," her voice reduced to a raspy whisper. Armin gripped her shoulder, and he, too, started trembling, "I miss you, too, Eren. Our lives were never the same after you were gone." Tears started rolling down their cheeks. All they could do was snivel in front of his grave. Mikasa kept on repeating his name between sobs.
Armin continued between each heave, "I know that you don't like seeing us like this, but we can't help ourselves, Eren. We loved you like our brother, and you loved us like your siblings. Thank you for being my friend, Eren. You and Mikasa have taught me to become strong, and I will continue to do so in your stead." He brushed his eyes with his sleeve.
Mikasa wiped her tears with her scarf, "Thank you for being together with me and Armin. Thank you for teaching me and Armin how to live. And most of all…" she paused. "Thank you for wrapping this scarf around me!"
Both of them started smiling through their tears. Armin brought out his book that contained the wonders of the world outside the walls. "Hey, Eren! Guess what? The Scouting Legion will be holding expeditions to explore the outlying territories. Miss Hanji invited us personally!" Mikasa nodded and smiled. Armin, with sparkling eyes, went on as he flipped through the pages of the thick book, "I can't wait to see them! Far beyond these walls, there's flaming water, lands made of ice, and fields of sand spread wide. It's the world my parents want to go to."
While Armin was preoccupied with the book and thoughts of exploration, Mikasa fumbled her pocket and retrieved a handmade handkerchief. "Look, Eren. This is the embroidery my Mom taught me when I was little. It's for you," her face flushed. She placed it beside the bouquet.
And the two of them stayed beside Eren's grave until sundown.
We wish we could see the world with you. We would've been unstoppable.
"Eren, once I'm dead, I won't be able to remember you. So I'll win, no matter what. I'll live, no matter what! This world is merciless, and it's also very beautiful."