Welcome to my new short story!

Legal: I own nothing but the idea.

Important things to know before reading:

*Adam is not dead, Becky died and heartbroken Adam did his first semester abroad

*The Bakers moved back to Florida when Becky died

*Zoe just doesn't exist after his breakup with Bianca Drew dated around a bit

*Eli did cheat and Clare took him back

*Miles and Winston never came to the school

*Clare did have sex with Drew during the dance but they used a condom and she is not pregnant

*Jay never dated or anything at all with Manny

*Spinner is married to Emma and they both live in Toronto still and Spinner runs The Dot

Ch. 1 Ever in Your Life

(CLARE)

"WATCH WHERE YOU'RE GOING YOU STUPID BITCH!" A girl screams at me after nearly hitting me with her car.

"LEARN TO DRIVE YOU DITZ!" I scream back at her, it's not my fault she swerved on the ice. Not sure that she actually heard me but it felt good to yell even if she is not the person I really want to be yelling at.

I had been walking for about twenty minutes because being home alone was driving me crazy. All I could do was think about Drew and how he'd discarded me after such a beautiful moment. I probably should have stood up for him more when talking to Eli but Drew just left, he didn't even hear me tell Eli that Drew had been there for me when Eli had failed to. That Drew meant something to me and was everything I needed and wanted. Before I could tell Drew what I had told Eli Drew decides that what just happened between us was just rebound sex! Does Drew honestly think I'm the kind of girl that has rebound sex? I've had sex with two boys ever, I don't sleep around and I don't have rebound sex!

At least Drew was gone for the next week so there was no chance of running into him. They were going to Omar's parents in Alberta for Christmas and Adam would fly in to meet them and fly home with them. As much as I was excited to see Adam again I could do without seeing Drew again for the rest of the year. I hadn't told Adam anything that transpired between me and Drew this past semester. With Adam doing his first semester in Austria we'd only exchanged a few e-mails in the last few months, although he was better at communicating than Darcy. I had no idea how much Eli or Drew had told Adam either but as Adam hadn't mentioned anything about any of it I was assuming he didn't know anything. I don't know about Drew or Eli but I felt like I couldn't really talk to Adam about what had gone on between me, Drew and Eli. Maybe I would talk to Adam when he was home but it was far too much and too complicated to put into an e-mail to him.

I hadn't told anyone what Drew and I did in the prop room at the dance, and I wasn't sure what he had told Dallas. I was certain Dallas would be the only one Drew would talk to about any of this if he had. I didn't feel like I could talk to Alli or Jenna about it, just admitting that I'd had sex with Drew spontaneously and I had initiated it would shock them. They'd probably think I had lost my mind; maybe I had at least part of it. Alli, Jenna and Adam were really the only three people I felt like I could talk to about anything like this and I didn't even feel like I could talk to them. So all my anger and frustration and everything else I was feeling had been stewing inside of me for the last two days.

I'm startled from my thoughts by a loud car horn and I look over at the car full of guys.

"Hey Cutey why don't you hope in the car and let us warm you up," one of them comments.

"No thanks I'm going in here," I tell them and walk in the door of the building I'm in front of without even looking at what it is.

When I step in I see that it's a pool hall and bar, looks pretty seedy and definitely for an older crowd than The Break Room. A few people look over at me when I come in but nobody says anything. I go to the bar and take off my thick winter coat because it's actually quite warm in here.

"What'll it be?" A female bartender asks as I sit on a bar stool.

"Umm just a coke please," I reply.

"I'd like to settle up my bar tab," a guy says and the bartender nods after handing me my coke. "Do I know you?" The guy asks me and I look over at him. "That's not a pick-up line I promise it's just you look really familiar and I can't place you. Did you go to DeGrassi?"

"I still do actually, I'm in my senior year," I reply and realize I've seen him before too. "You're Sean right? You dated Emma, I've seen pictures of you in Connor's house," I say and Sean wrinkles his eyebrows and then I realize he doesn't know who Connor is. "Sorry in Mr. Simpson's house," I correct and he nods.

"Yeah I'm Sean but if you're still attending DeGrassi I don't think I would have seen you," he says as the bartender hands him a receipt and he signs it.

"Oh sorry I'm Clare Edwards you probably knew my sister Darcy."

"Yeah I remember Darcy but you don't look anything like her. I do remember you now though, you looked a lot different but I have seen you before. What are you doing in a place like this?"

"Well I was tired of being home alone and I was walking to clear my head, and maybe wallow in self-pity a bit, but after nearly getting hit by a car and then hit on by some guys, with a truly unoriginal pick-up, line I ducked in here."

"Sounds like you've been having a rough day. I'm on my way to a Christmas party at Jay's place. Not sure if you ever met him but he's good friends with Spinner and your sister dated Spin didn't she? Spin should be there with Emma,"

"Yeah she did for quite a while and I do remember Jay."

"Well you can come to the party if you like. It's better than hanging out here or home alone and certainly better than wandering out in the cold," Sean offers.

"Yeah that sounds good," I nod getting off the bar stool.

I leave money for the coke and follow Sean out to his car. I don't put on my jacket just run through the snow with him. Once we're in his car I drape my coat over my shoulders. Sean turns on the heat and it warms up pretty quickly. It takes a little while to get to Jay's house and there's several cars already here. I follow Sean out of the car and he opens the front door walking in. Christmas music is playing and I see a few people in the living room, none of which I know and all of which seem to be at least five years older than me. Sean takes my coat hanging it up with his and I follow him into the kitchen where I do not see Jay but do see Spinner and Emma and they both see me.

"Clare what are you doing here?" Spinner asks me.

"I found her at Duke's Pool Hall and invited her to the party," Sean explains.

"What were you doing at a place like Duke's?" Emma questions.

"I just walked in to get off the street," I reply.

"She was having a kind of rough day," Sean explains and then Jay walks in. He looks just as I remember although he seems less intimidating now.

"Hey Sean 'bout time you got here, who's the…you look familiar," Jay comments looking at me.

"You remember Darcy's little sister Clare," Spinner says.

Jay looks at me with a furrowed brow for a few more seconds before nodding, "Yeah sure good to see. You look a lot different I never would have recognized you."

"I didn't either at first," Sean replies and then looks at Emma, "Who's Connor?"

"Archie's Godson why?"

"I told Sean I'd seen pictures of you and him at Connor's house before realizing he didn't know who Connor was," I explain and Emma nods.

"You want something to drink Clare?" Jay offers.

"No alcohol please, pop will be fine," I reply and Jay hands me a can from the fridge.

"Sean help me bring in some more beer from the garage," Jay requests and Sean nods.

I stay in the kitchen talking with Emma and Spin for a bit, catching them up a little with things. Spinner knows some stuff because he works at The Dot and I'm sure he over hears talking when he works the counter. I'm not sure how much he knows though and he doesn't work the front very much anymore. I don't tell them anything about me and Drew but I tell them Eli and I broke up and I've applied to Columbia, stuff like that. After finishing my drink I have to use the washroom and excuse myself after asking where the washroom is. When I return from the washroom Spinner and Emma are no longer in the kitchen, a few other people are but no one looks at me. I am at a party though and I figure I should mingle a little but I feel so out of place here being the only high school kid. Not that anyone knows but I'm pretty sure they can tell I'm younger than they are.

"Hi can I get you a drink?" A guy questions coming up to me. He looks me over with a half-smile and a lewd glint in his eye. "I can mix you a jaeger in coke," he comments.

"No thanks I don't do alcohol, alcohol and I do not mix well I'm a lightweight," I reply.

"Aw come on just a little one," he urges.

"Hey Jess the girl said no back off," Jay says to him in a slightly harsh tone and then holds his hand out to me, "come on Clare." I take his hand and follow him, we sit down on the sofa and he hands me a water bottle. "You look so different from the last time I saw you, I remember this skinny little geek with glasses and braids. Now you're a stunning, sexy woman," Jay says and I bite my lip feeling my cheeks blush.

"It's been a long time since you've seen me," I reply it was a stupid reply but it was all I could think of.

"So you're a senior now?" Jay questions.

"Yeah and student body Vice President."

"You're hotter than any Vice President DeGrassi ever had before," Jay grins and I blush again.

"Hey Jay your washroom is backed up," one of the party guests calls.

"Goddamit, I'll be right back," Jay tells me.

I nod and he gets up, I go into the kitchen getting something to eat and another pop. Then look for a napkin before sitting back on the sofa.

(JAY)

"Thanks for helping Sean, if I find out who clogged the toilet and made such a mess I'll kill them," I comment after we finish cleaning the mess someone made in the washroom.

"No problem," Sean smiles.

"I'll finish in here if you want to go clean up in my washroom and borrow some clothes," I tell him.

"Yeah thanks," Sean nods.

I finish mopping up and take the towels down to the laundry before lighting a candle to get rid of the smell. By the time I go up to my room Sean is out of the shower and putting on a pair of sweats and one of my t-shirts. I go into my washroom and hop in a quick shower then change into fresh clothes before going back downstairs. It's getting kind of late and a lot of people are traveling home for Christmas tomorrow, a few of them have work so guests are beginning to trickle out, of course it took us nearly an hour to clean up the downstairs washroom. When I come into the living room I hear Clare giggling and sitting with Jess. I'm about to go over but Spin and Emma call to me.

"Em has work in the morning so we're going go," Spin tells me.

"Merry Christmas," Emma says kissing my cheek as she hugs me goodbye.

I say Merry Christmas and hug Spin before they leave then go into the living room where Clare is still sitting with Jess. Sean is watching her closely too, I sit by him and we look at Clare who is giggling still. I take the can of pop from her hand and take a sip.

"It's been spiked," I tell Sean and look at Jess. "Did you spike her drink? I know you offered to mix her something earlier."

"She's a lot friendlier now," Jess replies.

"Get out," I growl at him.

"What for? I barely put anything in she's a real lightweight," Jess says.

"Because you spiked her drink even though she said no alcohol you asshole now get out or I will throw you out," I repeat and Sean stands up to throw him out.

"Chill I'm going, I gotta get home anyway," Jess grumbles and gets up while Clare continues to giggle.

"I'll put on some coffee and grab her some water," Sean comments after Jess leaves.

"Clare how do you feel?" I ask her.

"Fuzzy and a little lightheaded," she responds.

She stretches out on the sofa and I sit at her feet. Sean returns with a water bottle and tells me the coffee is on. I hand the water to Clare and she starts to sip at it. By the time Sean returns with a cup of coffee for her we're the only three still here.

"So you never did tell me why you were walking alone in the snow only that you didn't want to be home alone," Sean remarks now that Clare is sobering up.

"Your parents out of town or something?" I question.

"Yeah visiting my stepbrother in Vancouver but they return tomorrow to be home for Christmas. Why I was wandering is a longer story," she says.

"We got time," I shrug.

"Well I suppose it all started at prom last year," she begins.

She tells us about losing her virginity at prom then finding out she had cancer, her boyfriend coming home for the summer, getting close to Drew and then about Adam, who is her best friend and Drew's younger brother, being devastated when his girlfriend died. Adam decided to spend the semester abroad to deal with his grief. She and Drew became even closer and then Drew broke up with Bianca, Eli ignoring her and then she had sex with Drew after breaking up with Eli. She tells us how Drew decided he was a rebound and it made her angry then she starts crying and telling us she does not have rebound sex and she cries herself to sleep.

"I'll put her in my room, should probably keep an eye on her tonight. You want to crash here tonight in the guest room?" I ask Sean.

"Yeah I'm pretty tired," he nods.

I pick Clare up and go up to my bedroom laying her on the bed. My bed is a king size so there's plenty of room for the two of us. I take off her shoes and her jeans and then get Clare under the covers before I get ready for bed. Once I'm in bed I fall asleep pretty quickly. I wake late the next morning at the same time as Clare when she bolts up with a gasp.

"Why am I in bed with you? What went on last night?" Clare asks in an accusatory tone and it hurts a little that she thinks something bad happened. Before I can even say anything her face relaxes and she gives me an apologetic look. "I'm sorry I remember now I fell asleep while crying, I'm kind of embarrassed actually. I even vaguely remember you carrying me upstairs."

"I didn't think you should sleep alone in case you got sick. I'm still not sure what Jess spiked your drink with. And you shouldn't be embarrassed you had a right to be upset after what happened."

"Thank you it was sweet of you to watch over me all night," she smiles and it makes me smile.

"I'll start some breakfast, your clothes are on the dresser there," I tell her before getting up and pulling on some jeans to go downstairs. When I get downstairs I find Sean up and making coffee.

"She'll be down in a minute are you hungry?"

"Yeah I was just going to look at what you had for breakfast," Sean replies.

We start making eggs, sausage and toast and then Clare comes downstairs. We eat breakfast and she tells us more about her relationship with Eli and her friendship with Adam. How her mom got remarried and it chilled her mom out a bit and how Clare only hears from Darcy once every few months.

"Seeing as it's Christmas Eve I'm assuming you have to get home, with your parents coming home and all," I comment after breakfast.

"Yeah I should probably get home," she nods.

"We'll take you, I'll get my shoes on," Sean says.

I get mine on too and we get in my car, since neither Sean nor I have family in town he's spending Christmas here. Not that I even talk to my family anymore but all of Sean's family moved away and he doesn't travel out to see them much. Clare tells us how to get to her house and we drop her off.

"We should hang out again, we'll give you our numbers," I tell Clare before she gets out of the car.

"Yeah that would be nice," she smiles.

(CLARE)

"We're going to a party tonight Clare, we'll be home late, you can have a friend over if you like," Mom suggests.

"I think I'll go out," I reply. Today is Boxing Day, Mom and Glen returned home only an hour after I did on Christmas Eve. We spent the rest of the day together and all of Christmas day together. Glen was working this morning but my mom was home, I didn't tell her anything about sleeping with Drew or hanging out with Jay and Sean.

Mom nods and goes back upstairs to get ready. I finish cleaning the kitchen and then go upstairs and get my phone, I call Jay first but his phone is off so I call Sean.

"Hey Clare," Sean answers.

"Hi do you want to hang out tonight?"

"Sure Jay and I were going to go to a movie you want to come with us?"

"Yeah sounds good," I reply.

"Cool we'll pick you up in half an hour," Sean tells me.

I say I'll be ready and we hang up. I go to closet to get dressed, right now I'm dressed in sweats but I'm not going out like this. I choose black skinny jeans and a red and white stripe V-neck sweater with vertical stripes. I put on my black ankle boots and then go into the washroom to fix my hair, even putting on a little lipstick. I don't normally fuss so much just to go to a movie but I like Jay. I know it's a silly crush and he's six or seven years older than I am but it doesn't change how I feel. When I was younger he was just intimidating and after all the stories I heard he scared me but now he's handsome and intriguing. He's sweet too, kicking Jess out of the party and looking out for me, even letting me sleep in his bed and staying with me in case I got sick. He didn't touch me or take advantage of me at all.

While I'm getting ready my parents leave and when I hear the doorbell I grab my coat and go downstairs. I open the door and Jay smiles at me; I smile back and lock the door following him to Sean's car. Sean says hi and we drive downtown, Sean parks and we get out walking to the theatre. The guys pay for my ticket and the snacks, they insist on it, we find seats and watch the movie with me sitting between them.

"You want to get some dinner? When do you have to be home Clare?" Jay questions.

"Curfew is 12:30 when it's not a school night but I can tell Mom I'm sleeping at Alli's and stay out later," I tell them and Jay smiles. I call Mom and leave a voicemail that I'm sleeping at Alli's and I'll be home tomorrow. Mom doesn't need to know that the Bhandari family is still in India visiting Alli's grandparents.

We leave the theater and put our jackets back on to go outside, walking down the street to a restaurant to have dinner. While we eat Jay and Sean catch me up on their lives, not that I knew too much about their lives before this. I find out that they own a garage together and both are single, Sean is 22 and Jay is 25. Sean has an apartment just a block from Jay's house but he spends more time at Jay's than his apartment. Aside from Spin and Emma they don't keep in touch with anyone from DeGrassi although Jay does occasionally hear from his ex Lexi, an ex that also dated Paige. When they aren't working they hang out at Jay's, Sean goes to Duke's once a week to play pool with some army buddies, which is what he was doing when he found me, they both play poker and sometimes go to bars.

After dinner we get back in Sean's car and drive back to Jay's house. We hang out in the living room playing five card draw. It's fun and I laugh a lot, it feels good to be relaxed and happy. I don't think about Drew or Eli once; I'm just having a good time. I win the poker game even though we're just playing for snacks. After poker Jay puts on a movie and the three of us watch sitting together on the sofa.

"Well I open the garage tomorrow so I think I'll head home, see you tomorrow Jay. Later Clare, we should hang out again before you go back to school," Sean says when the movie is over.

"Yeah definitely," I grin getting up to hug Sean goodbye. He hugs Jay goodbye then leaves locking the door behind him.

"Well since you lied to your mom about sleeping at a friend's I guess you'll be sleeping here," Jay comments.

"I can sleep at home if you want but you'll need to give me a ride," I reply.

"No it's cool you can sleep here, there's a second bedroom. Unless you want to sleep in my room with me again," Jay remarks.

"Uh the guest room is good," I respond somewhat nervously even though sharing a bed with Jay is a little tempting. Okay it's very tempting.

"Do you want to borrow a shirt to sleep in?" Jay questions.

"Yes thanks," I nod. I follow Jay upstairs and he gives me a t-shirt to sleep in then shows me the guest room.

"Sean usually sleeps in here, I should probably change the sheets," Jay says after turning on the light. He goes out to the closet getting new sheets and I help him change the sheets on the bed. "Come get me if you need anything," Jay tells me before leaving the room and closing the door behind him.

I change into the t-shirt he got me and I start to get in bed but realize I'm thirsty. I go down to the kitchen to get a glass of water and find Jay in the kitchen.

"I just came down for some water," I tell him when he turns around and looks at me. He seems to be enjoying the sight of me in his shirt. I tug it down a little and Jay looks up at my eyes. He smiles and grabs a glass from the cupboard before getting the water pitcher out of the fridge. "Thanks," I smile pouring myself a glass and he puts the pitcher back. We walk upstairs together and I almost go straight into my room but I stop. "Jay," I say turning around and he turns around to look at me.

"Yeah?"

I walk over putting my hand on his shoulder and stand on my tiptoes gingerly placing my lips on his. When he doesn't pull away I deepen the kiss slightly parting my lips. Jay's lips also part slightly and he responds to the kiss. I wait a few more seconds, very softly tugging the corner of Jay's bottom lip as I pull away.

"Goodnight," I whisper turning and going into my room. I close the door and lean against it, letting out a breath I'd been holding since seeing Jay in the kitchen. "I can't believe I just kissed him!"

This won't be updated again until December because November is one shot month. December however is short story month and the update for this story on Tuesday December 8th will probably begin with the next morning in Jay's pov. It will also include Clare spending more time with both Jay and Sean and her return to school.