Every where he walked, he couldn't get away from them.
They followed him like bees to flowers.
Jay came near to the entrance of a grimly graffitied looking corner shop, which was illuminated by the dim flickering light of the street lamp, when a champagne blond teenage girl exited the shop and looked straight at him. Jay thought nothing of this adolescent and carried on his journey to... where? Exactly where was he going? He was baffled. He had no clue where he was. Then, the young girl started talking, to Jay. 'Not again' he thought.
"Jay. Why did you leave me? We could've had so much... fun!" She casually grinned with the hint of cheekiness. Jay recognized that playful smile and the blond hair that fell around face. Oh, that's right. It's Kitty. The girl from the local pub. The girl who he kissed in that regrettable moment of depression.
"Go away, Kitty. I love Abi and only her!" Jay hollered.
Kitty simply smiled at this like it amused her. Jay seriously hated this girl. How could he have kissed those lips? Warm and welcoming, that what he enjoyed, and that description fitted Abi's a lot. How could Jay be so ludicrous to share a pass on a sign of affection, they were only for the people he loved. With that, Jay ran in the opposite direction, whacking his temple to make sure he was actually experiencing this, on the way. As soon as the corner shop was out of eyesight, Jay began to slow down and scanned the surrounding area. He found a rustic grey stone bench, which was icy cold to the touch, but Jay sat down anyway and began to relax, substituting the oxygen he lost whilst running like an enraged bull chasing after the red flag. As soon as he started to calm down with the starry night above him, Jay should have predicted what was going to happen. Right in front of him another horror unfolded but this one was worse than Kitty, way worse. Jay would never forget this night because it was always in the back of his mind desperate to take centre stage and make Jay go insane but Jay was strong. There was map sign post but the thing was, it rippled to a different image, one of which was the night Ben killed Heather. Jay watched on in apprehension, ill to the core, knowing full well what will take place also knowing the fact he can't stop it just like he couldn't on that terrible night. He always wanted to go back in time and stop Ben from even going over to the flat and maybe everything will be okay and Jay would stop having flashbacks and more importantly, Heather would still be alive and George wouldn't be motherless just like Jay is. Every day, Jay always apologized in his mind to both of them, hoping with every ounce of his soul that Heather would hear his silent apologies. Before he could see that terror once again, he stepped towards the sign and with all his might, his fist was lunged into the image and it cracked leaving plastic splints in his hand but the image disappeared with the normal map taking it's place. Therefore, he turned and ran like mad accompanied with his throbbing and bleeding hand. He already seen too many things again, his dad alive and dead, his gang days, him getting stabbed and many more and now Kitty and Ben and Heather. It can't get worse, can it? 'Surely not' Jay hoped. However, he was erroneous as ever. When Jay arrived at a pleasant looking family home five minutes later, coming down the stairs was the most beautiful thing that ever happened to him: Abi, his Branningflakes. Jay should have been happy to see her warm sparkly eyes, her gentle smile and dazzling blond hair that fell gracefully around her face. But he feared what was coming, the anxiety building up inside him, grabbing his vital organs, making it hard for him to think, breathe or anything. The worst possible words he feared would ever have to hear leave her mouth was actually being spoken aloud:
"Jay. I don't love you any more. Who am I kidding? I never loved you. You are just a immature good-for-nothing scoundrel who no one gives a damn about. Who could possibly peak a look at you, never mind to actually love you and start a family with you. You just fooled yourself, no one else. Every body is right about you, you know? Jay..." She dragged out the name as if it was a distasteful piece of parsnip (she absolutely hated that vegetable) she just ate. "That name is poison. You are just a frivolous teenager who leaves disasters everywhere he goes. Now, clear off out of my sight. In fact, leave Walford because no one, certainly not me, wants you here." Jay watched helplessly as the love of his life ascended the stairs as he tried to shout out to her but it was no use, his tongue was tied. After Abi slammed the door, Jay fell to the cold and wet pavement on his knees and did something he hadn't done for a long time and swore he would never do again. He positioned his head in his bloodied hands, and cried until there was no more tears left to run.