Hey!

This is my first story that I am publishing on here, so I am a little nervous. I hope that you guys like this story!

For clarification, My story begins just after the end of season 2. Bill went missing for a week after the night that he proposed. The story begins about six months later. Flashbacks are italicized

Chapter 1: Rapture

The night I laid my eyes on you
Felt everything around me move
Got nervous when you looked my way
But you knew all the words to say
Then your love slowly moved right in
All this time oh my love where you been?

iio-Rapture

This time Sookie was driving. Bill was usually the one who drove her around on all of their dates, but tonight, she needed to change the dynamic. For the last six months she had been pretending to have the same feelings for Bill that she had before he disappeared. She tried to tell herself that nothing had changed since he left, and even accepted Bill's proposal. She was willing to commit to an engagement, but she still wasn't sure if she could marry him. She knew that Bill sensed her uncertainty, and that was probably why he had been pressuring her to make wedding arrangements for the last few weeks. Now Bill's presence only suffocated her, she knew deep down that she couldn't marry someone who kept secrets from her. She needed time to think. She needed time to breathe, especially on her own.

She told herself that she was deciding to stay in the relationship on her own free will, but she knew that she was only staying with Bill out of loyalty and guilt. Tonight she needed to prove to herself that she was the one in control of their relationship. She needed to be the one who drove the car.

Though the moon was only a sliver in the sky, and no stars could be seen in the heated fog of night, Sookie could see better tonight than any other night that she could recall. Her surroundings looked crisper than before. She became especially aware of her heightened perception when she passed the familiar oak tree on the side of the road. Previously on other nights, when Sookie would pass this milestone on her journey home, the tree would look more like a long thick pole, with a dark cloud that clung to it when the wind blew on stormy nights. On this night as Sookie came to the familiar curve in the road, where the tree stood, she could make out the individual leaves of the tree, and could even distinguish between the colors of the bark and the leaves.

Sookie was relieved to see the tree because she knew that she would be home very soon. Bill had been quiet for most of the car ride, and she was enjoying it. She was finally given the opportunity to think about the things that she had been avoiding.

Sookie's mind instantly drifted to the problems she and Bill were experiencing in their relationship. It was obvious to Sookie that Bill had once had influence over her. In Dallas she felt that she needed him, and that she couldn't be happy without him. The thought of her dependence on Bill scared her at the time. She always yearned to be independent, and promised herself that she would never let anyone prevent her from being self-sufficient, especially not a man. Then her problem changed when she got engaged to Bill. She no longer felt that she needed Bill in her life. How could she marry someone who she could live without? The more Sookie thought about their relationship the more apparent it became that her feelings changed the moment that Bill came back.

After Bill went "missing" for a week after the night of her proposal, he suddenly on a rainy night knocked on her door. For an entire week she didn't have one call answered, or given any explanation for why he left her.

Even though it was very late that night, Sookie was still awake, sitting in her bed. When she heard the familiar knock ricochet through her house, she knew instinctively that it was Bill. Her heart jumped with anticipation at the sound of his knock, and she quickly ran down the stairs to great him at the front door.

When she opened the front door she was surprised to see Bill so composed. She expected him to be in torn clothing. Instead he stood before her in a suit. She thought that he looked rather professional and business-like considering the rain. "Bill, please come in." Sookie gave her invitation with a soft calm voice. It was clear to her from Bill's demeanor that she was more excited to see him, than he was to see her. She didn't want him to know that their affection for one another was imbalanced.

Instead of leading Bill to a sitting area, she purposefully walked over to the kitchen. She jumped on the counter top so that even while sitting she was still as tall as Bill. She evaluated him as he stood in front of her. Sookie could tell that Bill expected her to make the next move, she didn't like nor dislike this added responsibility. "So Bill, where have you been?" she said coolly.

Sookie watched as Bill stepped forward so that the gap between them was diminished significantly. She felt his hard chin gently rest on top of her head. For a moment there was silence, and then she felt Bills arms wrap around her body in a warm embrace. She heard him murmur "Sookie, I can't tell you where I've been." She expected Bill to loosen his grip on her, but instead she felt his arms tighten around her. The added physical contact reignited the emotions that she had hardened herself against while he was gone. She began to feel more vulnerable to him, and she began to shudder in his arms. She didn't need to say anything, she just wept. She didn't want to fight with him. She wasn't sure that their relationship could survive that now. She wasn't even sure about how Bill felt about her. Instead of questioning him, Sookie chose to say the only plea that she felt would bind Bill to her once again. "I trust you."

That night they cuddled and went to sleep in each other's arms. However when Sookie woke up the next morning and the emptiness of her lonely bed crept in, she couldn't help but think about why Bill had left her. She thought that he should have found a way to contact her, to reassure her. She hated that Bill kept secrets from her. She couldn't help but feel that way even though she now had secrets of her own that were created while Bill was away. She like Bill was unwilling to share her secrets, for the moment.

Suddenly Sookie remembered where she was, and what she was doing. She looked over her shoulder at Bill, to see if he noticed the change in her behavior that was caused by the memory. To her Bill's face looked almost stoically at the road. Soon a sense of guilt flooded her. After all she couldn't entirely blame Bill. It was clear that his recent actions were not helping the situation but there were other things that were triggering her as well. She probably would have been more in the mood to work on her relationship with Bill if she wasn't feeling so much pressure from those around her. Not only was Bill anxious to get married but so were some of her closest friends including Tara, Jason and most surprisingly Sam.

It was about a week after Bill had returned that Sookie finally made her engagement with Bill official, and began to wear the ring. The next day she went up to Sam's office at the beginning of her shift and told him,"Sam I need to tell you that I am now engaged to Bill."

She saw Sam react with a genuinely large smile. "I am happy for you Sookie, I think that Bill is a decent guy. I was thinking about it, and since things have been slowing down around here, I don't think I need as many people to work the nighttime shift. Also I have been feeling badly about keeping you away from Bill since there is such a limited amount of time that you two can spend together every day, I mean night. So I have decided to give you only day shifts from now on." As soon as Sam finished his speech, Sookie ran over and gave Sam a warm hug. "Thank you so much. I don't think I deserve it."

Sam pulled Sookie away from him gently. "You can consider it an early wedding present." At the time Sookie was genuinely grateful to Sam. She thought that the extra time with Bill would allow her to catch up on all of the time they missed while he was away. Deep down inside, Sookie felt that the extra time was necessary for their relationship. She thought that it would bring them closer together. She couldn't help but think about how her relationship with Bill was strengthened on the trip to Dallas. It was there that she was able to spend quality time with him, without having to worry about the little things in life. In fact it was in Dallas that the feeling of love first made its presence known.

Sadly the extra time did not prove to be the relationship fixer that it had once promised to be. Lately the extra time had proven to be more of a curse. Sookie would spend so much time with Bill that they would sometimes run out of things to say. Even when they were on dates, they would just sit together in silence. Instead of the silence being comforting like the silence that old couples share, their silence was filled with anxiety and insecurity. The feeling was similar to the anxiety that new couples feel when they are out on their first date and a pause occurs. For Sookie, the silence was a sign that she wasn't as emotionally connected with Bill as she once was. And now more than ever before, her relationship with Bill seemed as delicate as a Faberge egg.

Sookie was so lost in her thoughts that she became startled when she heard Bills voice for the first time that evening. "Sookie there is something that I need to tell you. I didn't bring it up at the restaurant because I didn't think that it would be appropriate. Can we discuss the matter at your home. I think it would be better if you are in a comfortable place."

Sookie sighed and exhaled deeply so that the heavy air no longer exerted an unbearable pressure on her chest. She knew that Bill was worried that she wouldn't invite him back in after she rescinded his invitation earlier in the evening, when they got into an argument. "Bill, if it has anything to do with planning the wedding, I don't want to discuss it now. I still need more time to think, and although I enjoyed dinner it was not enough to make me feel any more confident in our engagement. I think I still don't trust you completely. I think that I lied when I said that I trusted you enough to not demand an explanation from you when you went missing. I think that you should have tried to give me some sort of explanation. What kind of marriage can we have when you don't tell me things, and there are secrets between us?"

She could see that Bill's face was a little resigned. "Sookie I know." Sookie heard Bill pause while she drove up the driveway to her house. She was glad that she was back where she felt that she belonged. Even though a normal engaged couple would start making plans to move in together, Sookie was in no rush to fulfill that obligation. She liked living in her grandmother's house alone. That way nothing could be changed from her grandmother's original intentions. Somehow to Sookie it was more important for her to obey her grandmother's wishes than to be physically connected with Bill. In fact Bill's physical closeness to her was no longer a concern of hers. She no longer felt the need to have sex with Bill regularly, and it had been 12 days since they last had sex, but she wasn't counting.

"Then Bill, what is it that you want to talk about?" She walked over to her front porch, and then slowly walked up the stairs to her front door so that Bill could keep up with her. When they both reached the door, Bill asked "Can I come in?" Without looking at Bill, Sookie stated loudly "please come in Bill." She walked over to her living room where her favorite linen couch was, and sat down on one end of it. She waited for Bill to close the front door and to take a seat next to her. She watched as Bill followed her lead, "So what is it that you want to tell me?" Sookie made sure to make eye contact with Bill as she asked her question.

She watched Bill's movements closely. She saw his hand move towards hers, and she wanted the physical comfort, and she didn't know why. But before Bill's skin even touched hers, she saw his hand pull away. "I have been forced to accept employment. The job will start tomorrow. I will be working from sunset until about 2:00 am every night. I don't know how long I will have this new job for, or even if the hours will change in the future." Sookie understood what Bill's words meant but they hadn't sunk in yet. She felt his eyes searching hers for a reaction, but she didn't have one because all she felt was numb inside. She was sure that Bill could probably sense her feelings. He continued, "It would mean that we would have less time to spend together. I can already feel you pulling away from me and I don't want this new job to jeopardize our relationship." After hearing Bill's pleas, Sookie couldn't help but think that Bill knew that this job would impact their relationship. How could he not know that? And still he chose to take the job anyway.

"Will you at least tell me what the job is?" Sookie had to ask the question even if she didn't expect an answer.

"You know that I can't tell you. I want to tell you, but there are certain things that I can't tell you."

"Does it have anything to do with the week that you disappeared?" Sookie was swiftly becoming more irritated. "Wait you don't have to answer that because I already know that it has something to do with vampires and their secrets." As soon as she stopped yelling, her anger began to dissipate and the familiar numbness returned to her.

"Sookie you know that I would tell you if I could. I don't have a choice. Believe me I want us to be the way we were only a short time ago."

Because Sookie had already emotionally removed herself from the situation, Bill's words fell on deaf ears. She looked at him intently. Even though it was obvious that Bill was upset she could also detect in his face the familiar look of hunger. She suddenly remembered that at the restaurant they had run out of True Bloods, so that meant that Bill hadn't fed yet. "Are you hungry?" Sookie asked softly. She watched Bill nod his head almost shamefully. She took his gesture as an invitation for her to help feed him. She told herself that she was feeding him out of pity, but she could still feel something else pull her towards him. Silently she crawled along the couch and then on top of Bill where he was sitting. She straddled her legs over his so that their chests were facing one another. She knew that Bill liked to feed from her neck, so she began to bend her head down gently, and then swept her hair over her shoulder so that the flesh of her neck was now exposed to Bill.

She felt Bill grab her waist and pull her towards him, so that he was more comfortable. The new position placed Sookie's core directly on top of Bill's cock. She heard Bill's fangs snap down with a click, and felt his erection press into her center. It was not until then that she realized that she was in a dress, which meant that she had one less layer of fabric separating her core from Bill's erection. Usually having such a thought would arouse her, but instead she felt frigid.

She felt Bill lean down on her neck and gently caress her skin with his nose. He smelled her patch of skin deeply. "You know that I only drink from there when we make love... passionately." She heard Bill say breathlessly.

"Bill, I don't know if I can tonight." She paused for a second, thinking about what she was about to do. She wanted to leave Bill just as much as she was afraid of losing him. For the last few months she had been acting on the cautious side, trying to maintain her relationship with Bill, and tonight was no different. "I need you to help me go through with this. Can you help me? Help me open up to you."

She felt Bill lean in to her neck once again and whisper "relax Sookie." She shivered as Bill placed his cold tongue on the most sensitive part of her neck. Her head was then pulled by Bill's hand to look at him in the eyes. She leaned into his face and began to gently kiss Bill's lips. She felt his tongue subtly invade her mouth, gently messaging her tongue. Her mouth was being dominated by Bill's incessant kisses. She felt his hands travel to her hips where they griped her tightly and began to pull and push her so that her core began to grind against his erection.

Because he was kissing her so deeply, Sookie felt forced into breathing deeply. She was almost gasping for air with every opportunity that Bill's mouth gave her. Her chest was heaving up and down, and she could physically feel her diaphragm expand and contract over and over again. Slowly an invisible string was formed connecting her diaphragm to her core, so that with every breath she could feel a drop of wetness seep out of her. As Bill continued to grind her hips against him, she felt her panties become wetter. Soon her panties were so wet that they stuck to Bill's pants, so that with every thrust she was sliding against her own wetness, her own soft slippery lubricant.

Finally she could feel Bill let go of her mouth. He then began to kiss her neck and then her chest. His cold tongue sparked her skin, which heightened her skin's sensitivity to his touch. She enjoyed the sensation that Bill's hands gave her when they slowly moved from her hips to her chest. He dipped his hands into the cups of her dress. He then spun her around so that now her back was to his chest. He again put his hands over her breasts.

Sookie could feel the warm rush start to build inside of her. Her core felt the anxious itch to be touched and she began to grind her hips more forcibly against Bill's erection. Bill's hands started to match Sookie's fervor, and they began to message her breasts more forcibly.

"Sookie, close your eyes. Concentrate on the sensations that you feel when I do things to you."

She obeyed him, and closed her eyes just as he had asked. Without her sight, Sookie began to concentrate on what she heard. She could hear her own panting that came from high up in her chest slowly become more guttural and deep. Her moans were now being rumbled through her diaphragm, and her core reacted to every vibration. She was still getting wetter by the second.

The stimulation on her clit that the gyrations were giving her made her vaginal walls clamp down in rhythmic waves. But because Bill was still not inside of her the teasing ripples were never stimulated they way she wanted them to be. In frustration Sookie cried out "Bill." That was the most she could say between moans of pleasure.

"I am taking you upstairs. Don't open your eyes." Bill growled out his words.

She was picked up swiftly, and before she knew it she was in her own room. She felt butterflies in her stomach as Bill threw her on the bed forcibly. She felt him rip off her clothes ruthlessly. Once she was sprawled on the bed completely naked from head to toe, she saw Bill crawl over her. He began kissing her stomach and then slowly worked his way down her body until he was face to face with her mound. The flesh of her mound was the pulled apart so that he could target her clit more effectively. Her vaginal opening throbbing open, almost panting as hard as Sookie was. Slowly she felt Bill's fingers slide into her.

Sookie tried to focus on the pleasure that she was feeling. The taunting feeling of a climax soon began to build within her. She felt like she was imminently close to coming. She tried to focus all of her attention of the sensations that Bill was giving her, but the more she tried the more her mind wandered. She felt her body begin to clench, knowing that she was only one stroke away. . . and then her mind wandered again for just a second and there was nothing. For whatever reason she had become immune to Bill's touches. She was now over stimulated and nothing could make her receptive to Bill except time.

She pulled out of Bills grasp just enough to make him stop his actions. "I'm sorry, I guess I can't tonight." Bill looked dejected. He pulled her thigh a little more towards him , and bit into her leg. After a few seconds he finished feeding on her, and crawled over to the other side of the bed.

Before Sookie went to sleep that night, Sookie wondered to herself whether the reason why she couldn't come for Bill was because she preferred someone else.

Eric is coming next chapter! Please Reveiw. It will inspire me to keep on writing. Tell me what you think of the story so far, or if you have any suggestions. Also I don't have a Beta, so if anyone out there wants to be my beta I would appreciate it!