Laying in bed together, Derek hugged Meredith close. He kissed her gently on the lips and used his fingers to push back a stray strand of her hair.
"What is this? Meredith, what are we doing here?" Derek spoke slowly after finally making up his mind to ask the question. How long had it been since they started this? What were they? He knew that Meredith loved him and he loved her, but she never seemed ready to commit. His eyes scanned her face for some sort of reaction.
"What do you mean, Derek? It's sex. Really good, seriously good, sex." She looked like she might say more, then she just smiled. She was trying to avoid this.
"I need to know where it's going. I can't just be… this isn't what I want." He didn't understand the problem. If two people love each other, than what was so hard about having a relationship? He had been thinking about this a lot lately. He knew that she had been hurt when she found out about his marriage. But he also thought that they had gotten past it. Addison was gone and they were free to be together. Didn't she want to be with him?
"Then what do you want? This is supposed to be fun, remember? Talking about the future is not fun." Meredith scooted to the other side of the bed.
Derek put his hand on her shoulder, but she shrugged it off.
"Look, I have a shift in a couple of hours, so I need to get some sleep." She sounded annoyed.
Derek pulled his hand back, but for a few moments did nothing else. When Meredith didn't speak again, Derek got out of the bed and got dressed. He took another look at Meredith and quietly made his way out of the room. He really wished that she could get past whatever issues she was having. He just wanted to be with her. He just wanted Meredith to let him love her.