Credit to Tolkien, for even though he made amazing characters and then killed them off in the worst way possible in order to make me cry, he still invented the best books ever.

Another thanks to Duilin and CrackinAndProudOfIt for their own invention; The Plush Toy Collaboration!

And Crackers, I thank you for doing a wonderful job on beta reading this for me, and for correcting some mistakes (some of which were quite embarrassing!).

Enough talk! I present to you, my attempt at a Plushie fic!

"And you're sure you didn't order it?"

The sound of her father's voice made her hands start to tremble. It wasn't that he was shouting, or glaring down at her. No, not at all, for he had no need to. But the sound of his mere voice was enough to intimidate the girl.

For several moments, she stared down at the oversized parcel that was found early this morning by her dogs (the eight of them had all barked mad and pounced on it). Praying she wouldn't say anything to displease her dad, she finally gave a slight nod.

"Yes … yes, I'm sure I didn't. If I did, I'd remember ordering something this … big ..."

"But it has your name on it!" her father protested.

With a sigh, and without looking at him, she knelt down to study the label on it.

Package 1 of 5 – Darn it! There were more of these things to arrive?

Addressed to: Elf from Downunder – And she was being stalked! How did these people know her fanfiction pen name?

Day of activation 07-01-13 – Day of activation? Was there a bomb in there or something? Or maybe a robot … from Japan. But whatever it was, it had plans to function. And on the date of her birthday, no less!

"Dad … I think … I think it's a birthday gift ..." Elf managed to say, just above a whisper.

Her father continued to glare at the parcel for its trespassing. "Well, is there a return address on it?"

Elf flipped it over. She checked every corner and every side and heck, if it weren't for the masking tape, she'd have turned it inside out. But alas, whoever dumped this on the verandah last night didn't even have the decency to stick on a return address to brighten her dad's day. Even if it was only a bit.

She shook her head. "No, sorry Dad."

Her dad rubbed his temples. "Well, it's your problem, so do whatever you want with it. Just make sure you put it where I can't see it … whatever it is."

Whatever it is, indeed.

Leaving his daughter kneeling awkwardly on the rotting verandah, the morning air of winter biting at the bare skin on her exposed face as she gazed at it in wonder.

"So, my question is," started Elf's younger sister, who was sitting cross-legged on her pink covered bed. (From here she shall be known as Clare to hide her real identity).

"How did someone manage to get this thing here, of all places?"

Elf and her two younger sisters were gathered in her room, which had little space and gaudy blue walls. Those, and yes, a pink bed.

Elf bit her lip, placing her shojo manga on her desk. "I don't know," she murmured.

"I mean," Clare continued, "we live 15 miles from the nearest town! and the closest farm is 5 miles away – we have no mobile service either! We're isolated! So how can this … stalker find us and dump that -" She pointed at the parcel, which was squeezed in through the door and taking up the walking space. "- on our verandah without anyone but the dogs noticing?"

The youngest sister, Boo, was chewing absent-mindedly on the ear of Takashi, her pink plush bunny. Poor Takashi had drool running down his smiling rosey face, and cotton was already finding its way out of the fabric.

"How am I supposed to know?" Elf couldn't help but scowl at Clare.

"Oh! Oh! What's inside it, sis?" Boo instantly made a grab for the parcel.

Elf immediately reacted, swatting the younger girl's hand away. "Don't touch it! We have no idea what's inside! What if it's something dangerous?"

Clare scoffed. "Oh yeah, 'cause someone totally wants to send you a death machine ..." She stood up, giving the parcel a curious look before squeezing out of the room.

She left a negative storm cloud hovering above Elf's head, who was now as frightened as anything. What could be inside?

"Well, Boo. Should I open it then?"

Boo nodded enthusiastically, biting harder into Takashi's ear. Feeling slightly comforted, Elf leaped from the bed and left for the kitchen to retrieve a knife – Boo following close behind.

Shivering as she walked down the seemingly empty hallway, she could smell the strong scent of her mother's cooking from the kitchen.

"Hey mom," she greeted as she strided in. "Is that lunch?" she wondered, stopping to glance at her mother busily frying fish and steaming something.

The Chinese-Filipino woman regarded her daughter quickly. "Yes, are you hungry?"

"Uh-huh." Elf opened the drawer, eyes scanning for a sharp enough knife.

"Have you done laundry yet?" her mom, commonly known as Gi by friends at work, reached for something in the pantry.

Elf didn't even bother to correct her mother's sentence, knowing her English wasn't perfect.

"No, I er, will get to that later."

Gi sighed. "You always say that. Go do it now, or you forget!"

Reluctantly dismissing her current, Quest-to-Open-Mysterious-Gift', Elf groaned.

Outside, the sun was beginning to shine, which was rare in July for folk in Australia. The birds were singing in the gum trees. Elf's kelpie, Strider, was practically grinning whilst pouncing on her leg. In fact, despite the season, little yellow flowers had begun to bloom among the bushes. Who wouldn't be delighted at such a scene? Elf sure wasn't!

The girl was in the middle of hanging up drenched clothes, mumbling about how long it was going to take. Normally she didn't mind such tasks, but the thought of the birthday parcel was ever in her mind. She was impatient and eager to open it.

"Strider, off!" the girl ordered, lightly pushing his canine head away.

He still grinned, barking wildly. At this, Elf's collie, Panda, burst into the yard and tackled Strider playfully, managing to knock over the basket full of soaked clothes in the process.

Panda and Strider barked and rolled in the grass, and Elf would have laughed at the sight. But no. She just face palmed at such fate and looked at the now dirty clothes in despair. Great. Now I have to pick it all up and rewash it. By hand … (Now is the perfect time to give praise to your washing machine people. For broken ones have proven to be useless.)

Bending down to begin her new task, she heard the front gate open. At first she ignored it, thinking it was only her father. That was, before she heard someone clear his throat.

Elf looked up, jumping in shock to see a man in farming clothes. He stood in front of her, slightly amused at her reaction.

"G'day. You know me?"

Erm, no, Elf thought, rather alarmed. And embarrassed. She straightened up and stood in front of the clothes, hoping he wouldn't notice the mess.

The man laughed. "Ah, didn't think so. I live by Drain Lane, not too far from here. And I believe I have a delivery for you."

Huh?

"You see," the man began, "I had these strange parcels – about my height - left on me doorstep this morning. About four of 'em! To think I would order something that large!" He shook his head. "The address on it was yours, so that was all good. Don't know who this 'Elf from Downunder' chap is. But you let him know that his order has arrived, alright?"

Elf's jaw dropped, nodding.

"All good, then. Might see you 'round. Give your old man my regards, will you?"

And he left, and Elf just stood there in stunned silence, not noticing Panda and Strider dragging all the wet clothes away to chew on.

She watched the man drive down the dirt road before he disappeared altogether, after which she walked to where the parcels had been left. Her heartbeat went up when she did, in fact, see four cardboard packages, all identical to the one of this morning, lying in a pile on the verandah.

"Who was that!?" her mother called from the kitchen.

Remembering the laundry, Elf cursed before running around the yard after the dogs. Then screamed like a banshee as she saw what they had done.