This is a fanfic based on the Steve Rogers x James Buchanan Barnes pairing, it will be quite depressing as I was given inspiration for this from the song "Bite" by Troye Sivan, HOWEVER (!) It will have a happy ending when completed :). In this there maybe a character death (it won't be anyone like Bucky, Steve, Sam, Natasha etc...) BUT I haven't decided yet... so yeah... enjoy :D!
1. A Frozen Heart
It was July 4th, Independence day for The United States, and, of course, Steve Rogers' birthday, all the avengers as well as the S.H.I.E.L.D agents which he personally knew were watching "28 days later" on the huge plasma TV in the lounge during the night as a thunderstorm hammered on outside. Everyone was glued to the screen until Natasha stopped the movie, "I'm going to get more popcorn" she announced as she slapped Clint's leg which he had put across her lap, "It's comfortable like this though.." he whined before moving it and Natasha got up as she playfully shoved the child like man. "Does anyone want anything?", She asks as she looks around at everyone who were either draped by blankets on the sofa or sitting on cushions on the ground, "Ooo, what about some more beer maybe?" Sam asks hopefully and Nat smiles, "Of course I can do that", she says before walking off into the kitchen. "What time is it?" Bucky asks with a yawn as he nudges Sam who he is sharing a blanket with, "It is... 2:05 am" Sam says as he whips his watch out from under the blanket. "I better be going up then", Bucky replies as he wriggles him self free from the blanket and stands up off the sofa before stretching, "I was personally surprised you lasted this long to be honest old man", Sam says with a smirk and slowly Bucky turns around before stripping off the blanket from Sam and throwing it in Tony's face, who happened to be on the floor behind him. "Thanks Bucky..." Tony mumbles before pushing the blanket off him to spot Sam's shocked face and laughing, "That was the worst thing you could do to any man!", Sam exclaims while still looking mortified, "You're not a man, you're a rat with wings" Bucky says as he turns to face Steve to tell him Happy Birthday, however he quickly plays off his turning around to talk to Steve as going to make his way towards the stairs once he saw Steve laughing with his arm draped round Sharon with her curled up in his side. As Bucky left, Tony's expression quickly changed as he sat next to Sam and whispered to him alone, "Did you also notice how he flinched every time there was either thunder or lightning going off?" Tony asked, "How could you not?", Sam replied as he took another drink from his can of beer, "That's why I annoyed him into sitting next to me", Sam continued, "It was good of you to do that Sam because Steve obviously was too fixated on Sharon to notice his PTSD was being triggered", Tony said before smiling at Natasha as she came back from the kitchen with popcorn and beer. "I have beer and I have popcorn", she exclaims as she lifts them up high to show them off before placing them down on the coffee table. "Where's Bucky gone?", she asks as she sits back in her original place next to Clint, "He's gone to bed", Sam says, "Oh... Should I go up and check on him?" Natasha asks as she focuses on Tony and Sam. "Nah... He'll be fine, he looked exhausted..." Sharon says chirpily as she rubs Steve's chest, instantly Sam's eyes narrow on her in annoyance; How could she know? She hasn't even looked at him once today?. Sensing the anger building in Sam, Natasha asks, "Shall we continue to movie then?", and she presses play on the remote.
Meanwhile...
Bucky could hear the faint murmur coming from the lounge of the TV and knew that they wouldn't be able to hear him from downstairs so he proceeded into his room before locking the door and strolling over to the window which reaches from the floor to the ceiling, once he reached it he then sank beside it before watching the rain assault the glass. In the silence of his room his mind is plagued by the way Steve and Sharon were flirting throughout the movie; You were stupid to think he could love you... Who would love a monster when you can have a beautiful woman... They are probably laughing about you right now... He will never love you..."STOP IT" Bucky screams as he grips his hair, "Just... stop", he repeats with the sound of him being broken evident in his voice before breaking down and crying against the glass. "Stop reminding me of something I can't have", he pleads as he looks mindlessly across the view of Manhattan before a flash of lightning plunges him back into WWII with the image of a shell exploding right in front of him...
. . . . . . .
After the flash of lightning and rumble of thunder Clint immediately looks towards the stairs noticing the sound of screaming in the background, "Natasha stop the movie", he says and Natasha shrugs as she reaches for the controller and presses the pause button, "What, do you need to tinkle or get mo-.." She teases before pausing as the loud screams of Bucky can be heard coming from upstairs. Instantly Steve detaches himself from Sharon and sprints up the stairs before reaching Bucky's door and he frantically tries to open the door before noticing it is locked, instinctively he breaks the lock with sheer force and runs over to bucky before kneeling in front of him and embracing the shivering man tightly. "Shh Bucky you're not there, you're with me... Wake up Bucky", Steve coos before planting a hand on each side of Bucky's face and lifting it to immediately notice Bucky cannot hear or have any recognition of Steve's presence due to him being lost in his flash back. Steve then closes the distance between them and stops Bucky's screams with a soft and tender kiss which snaps Bucky out of his state, after a few seconds Steve pulls back from the kiss and looks at Bucky to see his eyes were closed before slowly opening a few seconds later and he blinks blindly transfixed on what just happened. "Is he okay?", Sharon asks as she rushes in but is then quickly grabbed to a halt by Sam, "Well he is much better now he just suffered from his PTSD because none of us checked on him due to you believing he was fine", Sam says with thick sarcasm. "Lay off her butterfly", Natasha says with sympathy lacing her facial expression as she looks over Bucky which is crying into Steve's shoulder. "Oh great, the door has to be replaced" Tony exclaims before covering his mouth as he realizes how insensitive he was... also the fact that Clint, Sam and Natasha are all glaring at him as if they could kill him. "Guys go back downstairs and continue the movie I'll take care of Bucky", Steve says as he continues to rub Bucky's back, and before Sharon could protest Natasha pulls everyone out of Bucky's room and drags them downstairs, were a few seconds later the soft mumble of the tv could be once again heard.
"Bucky..." Steve coos and to respond Bucky takes his head out of Steve's shoulder and faces him with tears continuing to run down his face, "Oh Buck... What have they done to you?" Steve asks as he wipes the tears away from Bucky's cheeks. Immediately Bucky softens into Steve's touch and remembers the kiss which occurred before Sharon came into the room, "I meant it you know?" Steve says as he interrupts Bucky's thoughts as if he could read what Bucky was dwelling over, "The kiss... I meant it..", he repeated and instantly Bucky drops Steve's gaze, "No you didn't", he mumbles sullenly and Steve picks up his face before once again inching closer to Bucky, "Why would you think that?" he asks softly and as a tear runs down Bucky's face he answers, "Because you love Sharon".
dun dunn dunnnn...
To be continued...