Title: Confessions

Pairing: Nick/Zak

Rating: NC-17

Summary: Feelings shared.

Disclaimer: Don't own – please don't sue. Blah, blah, blah.

Confessions

Sometimes Zak thought the universe had a fucking twisted sense of humor. He couldn't come up with any other explanation for the fact that he fell in love with Nick Groff on the day that the man promised himself to another. For years he kept his heart hidden, working with Nick and their friend Aaron Goodwin to form a ghost hunting trio that led to a very popular TV show. He stood back as Nick became a father and moved away, his heart cracking as he slipped further and further away. He finally blurted the truth to Aaron one drunken night, only to swear him to secrecy as he sobered up in the light of day.

And then there were the times that he was convinced that the universe straight up hated him. Like that moment, sitting beside Nick on his couch, Gracie curled up on his other side, trying to absorb the huge bombshell the younger man had just dropped.

"What the hell do you mean, you left Roni?"

Nick sighed. This wasn't going to be easy. "Just what I said. I left her. I filed for divorce a week ago. I just can't do it anymore. I hoped that moving and getting away from Vegas would make things easier, but it didn't. If anything, it just confused things more. But I know that it's not what I want. And as much as I hate hurting Roni, I can't keep lying to her – or to myself. I'm in love with someone else. And I owe it to myself to see if there's anything there."

He laid a hand on Zak's denim covered thigh. Zak stared at it for a few seconds before he jumped off the couch, causing Gracie to go running out of the room. "What the fuck, Nick? Why are you doing this? Did Aaron tell you?" He started to pace, running his hands through his hair as his anger built. "How long have you known? I guess it doesn't matter, right? Did you tell Veronique? Did the two of you get a big laugh out of it? Did it give you some kind of fucking charge to know that I was panting after you? So what – you decided you're curious so you'll throw Zak a bone and see what happens? Fuck you, Groff. I don't need some kind of pity fuck."

Nick sat frozen on the couch, a stunned look on his face. "What the hell are you talking about?"

Zak felt his anger drain as confusion set in. "Jesus, do I need to spell it out? I want you. I have for years. And I'm going to kill Aaron for telling you."

"Aaron didn't tell me anything. I swear to you. I never imagined that you felt this way." He shook his head. "I'm fucking things up all over." He stood and walked to Zak, taking his hand and looking him in the eye. "Zak, this isn't just curiosity. I want to be with you. I've wanted that for a long time. It just took me a while to accept it."

Zak looked at him sceptically. He felt as if he were being offered a dream, but he kept waiting for the other shoe to drop. "Really?"

Nick nodded. "How can I prove it to you?"

"Well, a kiss would be a good start." Nick leaned in and put his lips to Zak's. They felt dry and slightly chapped, but incredibly soft. He gently ran his tongue over the pouty lips, coaxing them to open, and pushed his tongue into the waiting mouth. A moment later, they were on the floor, tongues tangling, teeth clashing in a passionate kiss. They kissed for several frantic minutes before breaking apart to stare into each others wild eyes.

Zak gulped in air, trying to slow his racing heart. "Holy fuck."

"Yeah."

"Now what?"

Nick rolled his hips down, grinding his cock against Zak's and grinning at the moan he got in return. "Bedroom?"

"Oh, fuck yes."

They got to their feet and stumbled into the bedroom, shedding clothes along the way until they collapsed across the king size bed clad only in their underwear. Zak ran his hands over Nick's bare chest, playing with the sparse hair and running his thumbs over tight nipples. "You have no idea how hard it's been to keep my hands off you all this time."

Nick blushed faintly. "I might have an idea." He palmed the bulge in the older man's boxer briefs before hooking his fingers into the waistband and removing them. Zak's cock was swollen and pulsing, the fat head leaking fluid onto his flat stomach. He wrapped a hand around the thick shaft, stroking as nervousness and lust ran through him. He bent his head and licked at the tip, tasting him for the first time. He grinned as his ran his tongue over his lips. "Not bad," he said as he took him into his mouth.

Zak gasped as he felt the wet warmth envelope his cock. His hand clutched the short hair on Nick's head as he bobbed up and down with long, eager strokes. He writhed on the sheets when he traced the fat vein on the underside with a barely there touch of teeth and sucked his balls into his mouth. Sucking him was just what Nick thought it would be, hot and salty and delicious. He thought to himself that he could definitely get addicted to it.

"Nick, hang on a minute."

Nick pulled off. "What's wrong? Am I hurting you?"

"Hell no. I was just about to blow, and I damn sure don't want this over so fast. Besides," he said with a grin, "I don't think you should get to have all the fun." He pulled Nick's boxers off and tossed them over his shoulder. He wrapped a hand around the throbbing cock and ran his thumb over the head, drawing more fluid from the tip. He experimented with different touches and pressure, taking note of Nick's reactions and learning what he liked best. Nick finally pushed his hand away, knowing that he was close to the edge.

"Condoms?"

Zak reached in the bedside table drawer, pulling out a couple condoms and a tube of lube. Nick tore the condom open and reached for Zak's dick but stopped at the slight frown. "What?"

Zak colored slightly. "I just – I kind of hoped you'd fuck me."

Nick felt himself harden even more. "Are you sure?"

"I've always wanted to feel you inside me. But only if you want to."

Nick kissed him. "Hell yes, I want to. I just didn't know if you'd be ok with bottoming."

"I want it. Just – I've never done this with a real person. I mean – I've used other stuff, but nothing as big as you."

"We'll go slow. I'll make it as easy as I can." Nick sat back on his heels and squeezed some lube into his palm. "Spread your legs a little more and bend your knees." He reached between Zak's legs and rubbed the lube over his hole before applying more to his fingers. He pushed one in gently and felt the muscle grip it tightly. He worked his finger around slowly, stroking the velvety skin inside and coaxing him to open. He put more lube on his fingers and pushed a second in, drawing a slight hiss from the older man. He kissed his inner thigh and waited a moment before moving his fingers. He pushed them deeper and crooked them, grinning when Zak bucked beneath him.

"Do that again."

Nick obeyed, pressing into Zak's prostate. "Like that?"

"Fucking A. Holy shit." He panted as Nick repeatedly stimulated the small gland. "Fuck me. I need your cock."

Nick pulled his fingers out and rolled the condom over his dick, spreading more lube over it and positioning himself at Zak's entrance. "Push out as I push in. It'll help."

Zak cried out and instinctively tried to pull away as the head of Nick's cock broke through the ring of muscle. Nick laid a hand against his chest and played with his nipples to distract him from the pain. "Relax. Just breathe and relax."

He closed his eyes and took deep breaths, feeling the pain recede until all that remained was a warm fullness. He opened his eyes and looked up at Nick. "More. Just go slow."

Nick sank in slowly, inch by inch until he felt his balls resting against the crack of Zak's ass. He leaned down and kissed his neck. "How does it feel, babe?"

A low moan was his answer. "So good. So full. Amazing."

"Ready for me to move?"

"Oh fuck yeah."

Nick pumped his hips, setting an easy rhythm. He watched his cock sliding in and out of Zak's ass and knew that it was a sight he would never forget. Zak settled his feet behind Nick's knees and rose up to meet his thrusts.

"Harder, Nick. Harder and faster."

Nick complied, pistoning his hips and pounding Zak's ass. He felt his orgasm coming and grabbed the older man's dripping cock, stroking firmly. It was only a moment before Zak came, creamy fluid shooting across his chest and abs. He clamped around Nick, and the added pressure was more than enough to trigger his lover's orgasm. Nick gritted his teeth and arched his back as he emptied, wishing briefly that he was shooting into Zak's ass instead of a condom.

Nick collapsed onto Zak's chest, panting for breath. He pulled out after a moment, tying off the used condom and climbing off the bed. He walked into the bathroom and tossed it into the garbage before wetting a washcloth with warm water and cleaning himself. He returned to the bedroom and cleaned Zak before crawling into bed and flopping onto his back. The dark haired man tossed an arm over his chest and snuggled close. He yawned and said, "I think I'm going to feel this tomorrow."

Nick traced the tattoo on his upper back. "We'll soak in the whirlpool when we wake up. That should help some."

Zak cracked a eye to look at him. "You going to stay the night?" The nervousness and tinge of fear in his voice belied the innocent question.

Nick kissed the dark hair. "I'm not going anywhere. Now sleep."

"Kay." Zak lay against Nick, his body going heavy and limp as he fell asleep. Nick closed his eyes and let the warmth from Zak's body seep into him as he followed suit.

THE END