Between the lines- Darvey.

So this story was prompted by Sara Bareilles' song, Between the lines. Every time i listen to it i think of Darvey's never crossing over relationship. It was supposed to be a one shot but then i watched the season 7 premier and it grew wings. Kicking and screaming at that Harvey/Paula kiss aaahhhhh!. But hey, i never expected Harvey to take the leap now, the show would be over then. The writers know that and so they are stringing us along. Not to worry Darvey shippers. Darvey is the end game. Ever wondered what happened to those Donna dreams in a space of maybe a day?Last season, which was maybe a day before this one, Harvey was dreaming of Donna. What happened to that?

So now, here's my take on all this. Darvey all the way!

Between the Lines

Time to tell me the truth

To burden your mouth for what you say

No pieces of paper in the way

'Cause I can't continue pretending to choose

These opposite sides on which we fall

The loving you laters if at all

No right minds could wrong be, this many times.

...

"I want more" She had said with tears in her eyes. She remembers that moment vividly. The look on Harvey's face. He had wanted to run and wanted to come forward at the same time. He had looked trapped. And she had chickened out. She had covered it. What she really wanted to say, she didn't say. She had chickened out. She had replaced heart with money. Emotion for a position. A partnership in the firm. That's not the more she had wanted. That's not what she had meant. But that's what she had been left holding. A shiny new office, as if she needed that. She looked on as Harvey walked away. He walked away with everything from her. Those words will never be said again between the two of them. "I love you?" Love me how?". Forever unspoken. They should have never been spoken in the first place. As it turned out, it had all been for nothing. Between the lines. It was safe here. No, what was wise was the other side, before the line. She never should have crossed that , never again. What had she been thinking trying to venture into uncharted waters? Who was she to dare want more? More, she scoffed. She ran her hands over her shiny new desk and looked around the office. It wasn't the more she had meant. But it was enough. It will have to be.

...

"I want more". Those words reverberated in his ears, unrelenting. He remembered Donna's face when she had spoken those words. He had been scared but at the same time wired. At least now she was going to say it. And he didn't have to be the one who had said it. He wanted it. He wanted it so bad. But he couldn't have it. Because he needed control. More than anything. He could not lose that. But he also wanted this. Maybe. All he knew was that at that moment he was scared. Scared that he was going to have to be put on the spot to have to say it again."Love me how?" And he wasn't sure he could answer correctly again this time. Or worse, maybe Dona wanted more, away from him. Crap shit! No. Not that. Please, never that. He felt his heart freeze with dread as Donna shed a tear looking at him. He didn't like Donna's tears. He could take anyone's tears but not Donna's. Never hers. He held his breath as he looked at her.

"What do you mean more?" He wasn't quite sure he was ready for that if she did answer.

She didn't.

Donna had looked away, and wiped her tears elegantly. "I'll see you in the morning Harvey." She had said and then made her escape.

He had taken a relieved sigh. But he wasn't relieved. No, it felt like now he had a sword handing over his head. And he hated to be put in that position. The position of waiting. What was Donna going to say tomorrow? What more did she want? What did she mean? Was he ready for that, if that's what she wanted? No shit he wasn't! And he didn't like being put in this position. He wanted control of his own shit and damn straight he'll take control of his own goddamn shit! All this was going on in his head as he was driving his Ferrari . The wind blowing his hair away. It didn't feel as liberating as it usually felt. He found himself parked outside Paula's driveway. She was now his other go to for help. But now he didn't just want help. He wanted, needed to get rid of the dagger hanging over his head.

He found himself charming Paula up, they had good chemistry. Maybe. Well he was never one to pass up a potential relationship with an attractive female. Except for Donna. Correction, from Donna he didn't just pass. From Donna he ran.

Well check it out, he had a date. With Dr Feelgood, no less. The very next day. The Specter charm always worked; of that he had never doubted. He was in his zone.

Now he was ready to hear what Donna was going to say. No, he was not even gonna let her say anything. He was going to talk first. Whatever more she wanted, he wasn't ready to give.

He was ready as he walked into the building the next morning as Donna was also walking in. He was ready, he had practiced his speech all night.

"Is that for me?" He asked jokingly, seeing as she was holding just one cup of coffee. Usually she would be holding two; one for him, one for her.

She scoffed, "No. Actually its for me. You're later than usual this morning. I've been waiting for you." She said casually.

That's the opening he needed, "Donna about the other night...,I know you said you wanted more but before you say anything..."

But the words that came out of her mouth were nowhere near what he had expected.

"I want to be a partner."

"Partner?" He was confused.

"Yes i figured out what i want and i want to be a Partner at this Firm." She said with her usual confidence.

And no, she wasn't kidding.

What he felt? He wasn't too sure. The first that registered was relief. Or was that disappointment. It all happened at once in his warring heart he didn't know which had come first. Disappointment that he had not suddenly been pushed into admitting what he needed to admit in order to have what he knew he wanted. Relief that at least she hadn't admitted what he needed her to admit in order to have what he knew he wanted. Needed. Relief that he could still square up his shoulders and walk with that undefeated gait and continue to pretend that he wasn't waking up every night these days dreaming about Donna. Dreaming of more, with Donna. Relief that at least he didn't have to recite that pathetic speech of his. The speech he had spent the whole night preparing, reason why he was 'later than usual this morning', her words.

Well he was not one to look a gift horse in the mouth. He had been offered an escape route. He had had to let go of a chunk of his pride when he had to forgive his mother and her lover. At Donna's probing, of course. The woman could make him do anything. It had been good for him, he would admit. He had his family back. His shit was together now. Some. But it had taken too much. And he wasn't sure he could take that other step. He couldn't handle a fall. God only knew he fell a long time ago but he had to admit it to be truly fallen. And he will never. Not in this lifetime. He saw what it had done to his father to fall. And with Donna he would not only fall, he would fall hard. It would be unbearably painful if she were to ever do to him what his mother did to his father. He could never fall. At least he would never admit it. He'll stay safe that way. He liked it when people loved him and he didn't have to love back. It was a safe and powerful place to be. He liked this space. And Paula,well, she loved him. She's pretty much said it at dinner. If she didn't yet she will. And he didn't have to give anything. At least not much.

A partner at the firm? It was a big ask but, he could swing it. No problem. Well, there was Louis.

...

He was charming, and handsome. And rich. And all things manly. But how could she do this? How could she have done this to herself? She was his therapist. She knew, better than anyone, his issues. And one of those major issues was Donna. How could she put herself in such a situation? Such a dangerous situation. Granted, she had not got into this thinking that her heart would be an issue. It was just a fling. Had been meant to be just a fling. She had never thought she would lose her heart in this game. She should have known better. She'd seen Donna. How could she do this to herself? Knowing what she knew. How could she? She had gone to dinner with him for the first time and when he could finally give her his attention, that is after she'd called him out on it, all he could talk about was 'Donna this' 'Donna that'. It had pissed her off. And she had finally found some sense to back out of all this. But then he had come to her house again. And he had kissed her. And she was sold.

She looked at the sleeping handsome face besides her. Heart, how could you? She berated herself in self pity. But why was she selling herself short? She had bargaining power here. Harvey now depended on her for help. Though it was only Donna who could get him to do anything. Donna was the one who had convinced him to forgive his mother after all, she knew that. The unscalable wall, and Donna had done it. But she was the one who now practically lived in his mind. She was his therapist after all. She just had to make it count. Could living in the mind be more that living in the heart? That's a theory she would like to test before she took herself out of the game. Besides, those two had known each other for thirteen years now, and still nothing had come of it. Maybe it just wasn't meant to be for them. They could have at least slept together at least once by now. But nothing. No right minds could this wrong be, this many times. She had a hand to play here. Mind over heart. She wasn't out of the game yet.

...

He snuggled closer to the warm body beside him in the bed. He could feel the hair cascading over his chest. He didn't want to wake up yet. Or ever. But he was pretty sure he had to wake up and go to work. He had some big shoes to fill after all and being late wasn't the impression he wanted to put across. Oh, but this was soo good. He cuddled her close and ran his fingers through her hair. Long red hair, felt like silk. Donna. He murmured.

The hair didn't feel quite right though. Not quite...,

Crap! He opened his eyes. Blond. Not red. Shit! He'd been dreaming again. He froze and looked at Paula. Trying to gauge where she was at with what he'd just said. She seemed surprisingly calm and happy. She had a smile on her face.

No woman would be this serene after hearing what he just said. No woman, therapist or not would react like that. Unless...unless he hadn't said that out loud.

"Good morning." She said

Oh thank God! He hadn't said it out .

"Good morning." He said with a relieved smile. He hadn't said it out loud.

But shit! He had to get his shit under control. Because if anyone could sniff out Donna dreams it would be his therapist for Christ's sake! His heart was starting to beat fast, realizing the situation he had put himself under. But maybe she could help him. She might help him get over this thing he felt for Donna. Whatever it was. He mused on that. It wasn't such a bad idea. Get rid of it once and for all Dr Magic. Make it disappear.

But right now he had to get to work.

...

Alrighty then. For now that's all. Don't lose hope Darvey shippers. Its not over yet. I believe that. See you in a bit.