This is the result of sitting around in an urgent care room for four hours. (I finished my book two hours ago and I would have gone insane without my laptop with me. It's soooooooo boring here.)

I hadn't been planning on writing this for some time. This is essentially the prequel to another story I was planning on posting when Please and Thank You is done (which shouldn't be too much longer). The next story will be strongly Ichigo/FemUkitake, just to let you know.

Disclaimer: Not mine now, not mine ever.

Summary: Being with her was the closest he'd come to happiness, but it was still so far away. Still, there was one thing he needed to tell her before the end.

Pairings: Aizen/Ukitake, slight Ichigo/Ukitake

Rating: M

Warning: FemUkitake, implied lemon, slight spoilers for Fake Karakura Arc

The One Thing He Had to Say

Her moans were the most beautiful music to him, the feel of her beneath him intoxicating. Her fingers dug into his shoulders as she cried his name. Hearing her angelic voice sent him over the edge. He moaned her name while spilling his essence inside her. He collapsed on top of her, still connected.

A soft sigh reached his ears as she wrapped her arms around him. "I'm afraid you've effectively exhausted me, Jūshirō," he said as he pulled out of her. He lay down beside her, never once breaking his embrace.

Jūshirō only let out a mumbled 'mmm' as she snuggled into his warmth. "I doubt that. You've never been exhausted, Sosuke."

Aizen smiled sadly down at the half asleep woman in his arms. After a few minutes that flew by too fast for the Fifth Division Captain, she was asleep. He ran his fingers through her hair, knowing this was the last time he'd get to admire it like this.

As much as he wished to call her his lover, he knew that would not be accurate. She did not love him, and no matter how much she tried to hide it from him, she was never good at deception. No, his beloved Ukitake loved another, although she herself was not yet aware of it. He'd tried to ignore the signs right in front of him, but when she'd whispered his name in her sleep he could no longer go on pretending.

Why, then, did he keep her by his side? That, at least, was simple. His entire life he'd felt alone, that's why he'd constructed this plan. Eventual that loneliness had brought about an anger, and the one he grew to hate the most was the one that the Seireitei embraced most fondly.

He'd started a relationship with her for the sole purpose of hurting her, and he still would. However, now he wished he had stayed away from her. Every moment he spent in her company was the closest to happy he had ever been. Their secret smiles and stolen touches had made his hear soar. She was also the only person to make him reconsider his plan, twice in fact.

When she came to him that night, almost two years ago now, was the first time. He shut his eyes briefly as he remembered their bodies entwined, and those three sweet words he'd pulled from her. He couldn't even remember his own mother saying so to him. For one brief moment he wanted to spend the rest of his life in her embrace, forgetting everything that he'd so carefully set in motion.

The second time was when he realized that Ukitake had discovered she didn't truly love him and yet still stayed with him. It was just how she was, sacrificing herself to take care of others. Even if it meant that she would not be happy, she stayed with him to make Aizen happy. This time the moment of doubt was longer, but in the end he wouldn't risk her becoming what he had, even though it was not in her nature.

But still the plan moved on, and tonight was the last he'd spend with her by his side. Before he could leave though, there was one thing he had to tell her, even if she couldn't hear him. "I'm so sorry, Jūshirō. Ichigo is quite the lucky man to have the one thing I truly wanted."

And with that, the warmth was gone. The worst part of it all was that he knew she would forgive him.

/

It took all his willpower not to seek her out when he stepped into the fake Karakura town. Never before had he been grateful for Marechiyo Ōmaeda's presence, for his whining offered Aizen the chance to study her.

There was determination in her eyes. She would do her duty as a Captain and nothing he said would deter her, not that he would even try in the first place. He knew better than to waste his time and breath. But the one thing he wanted to be there, the one thing he knew wouldn't be there, was hate. She'd heard him that night, and after she'd recovered from the shock of his betrayal, she had forgiven him. She'd never forgive the pain he'd put the rest of Seireitei through, but she'd forgiven the pain he caused her.

It was too much. If he…

And then Kyouraku placed himself in front of her, blocking her from his sight and cutting off his disobedient train of thought.

No, he'd come too far to stop, even for her.

/

He wasn't surprised when the Garganta opened near Ukitake and Kyouraku. It was, after all, exactly what he had ordered Wonderweiss to do. Yes, he had created Wonderweiss to nullify Ryūjin Jakka, but the Arrancar served another purpose. He would complete the one task Aizen himself could not do: kill Jūshirō Ukitake.

He tore his eyes away from her shocked face. He couldn't look at Wonderweiss' hand impaled through her chest. He heard a Cero being fired, Yamamoto shouting the names of the two fallen Captains, the two who were as children to him. For less than a second his will faltered and he took one step toward her before stopping himself. From the look Gin gave him he had noticed the move. Aizen shrugged it off, it didn't matter. This was a war, and in war there were casualties.

Around him the battles continued and finally his mind was taken off her by his own. And then he arrived. It was all exactly as he planned.

/

It was over. How? How had he not seen this? Everything he had worked for, it had all been futile. The orange haired boy stood close by, watching. Aizen's tired mind replaced Ichigo's face with that of the white haired woman he had once embraced. 'Ah,' he thought, 'that's why. The Hōgyoku knew what I really wanted in the end, and not even it had the power to grant my desire.'

"Take care of her, Ichigo," he whispered. Ichigo blinked in surprise before nodding. He would succeed where Aizen had failed.

And then…he stopped fighting.

/