Deep in a dungeon somewhere is the disclaimer saying that I don't own any Galaxy Rangers characters or any other cartoons. Just some more madness inspired by another favorite cartoon of mine.
Dungeons And Rangers
"Niko, your friend Roy gets us into more trouble than a barrel full of Lingling Berries," Shane grunted as the Rangers wandered the hallways of a darkened dungeon on a distant planet.
"Look, Roy told me he found a discovery of treasure in these ancient ruins and I know he's down here somewhere," Niko told them.
"Yeah all we have to do is find him and get out of here alive! Yikes!" He ducked as some alien bats flew by. He stumbled backwards and hit a hidden lever in the wall. The wall opened up behind him and he slid downwards. "YIKEEEESS!"
"Looks like Doc chose the way we should go," Zach remarked. The other rangers slid down the passageway and found themselves in large chamber.
A chamber covered in spider webs. Giant spider webs. And when there are giant spider webs…
"SPIDER! BIG HAIRY GIANT SPIDERS!" Doc screamed as a half dozen giant purple and black spiders advanced on them.
BOOM!
"What spiders?" Zach said calmly as he finished with his thunderbolt. The spiders had been obliterated into steaming goo.
"Ewwww…" Doc winced at the mess around him.
"Come on Doc, quit clowning around," Shane said. "Zachery's thunderbolt opened up a wall and there's a passageway we can go through."
"Oh I'm fine! Nobody worry about me!" Doc snapped as they went through the passageway. "I was just eaten by giant spiders. That's all!"
"You weren't even close to being eaten," Zach said.
"I could see their sharp fangs! That's close enough!" Doc said.
"Quiet," Niko held up her hand. "I hear something…"
"That's my heart beating so hard it's practically jumping out of my chest," Doc grumbled. He looked behind him and held up his electronic torch. "Oh wait no. It's a giant boulder that's going to flatten us all."
"Big deal," Zach flexed his bionic arm and charged it.
SMASH!
"Admit it," Zach smiled as he looked at the smashed remains of the boulder. "What would you people do without me?"
"Showoff," Shane grunted.
"Are we there yet?" Doc asked.
"Not yet, Doc," Niko said as she looked around. "I think we should try this passage."
They entered another passageway. "Look at all the weird cat statues," Zach remarked at several large cat statues in wrapping.
"Grrrr…"
"They're not statues are they?" Zach sighed.
"No, they are not," Niko said as the giant mummified cats sprang to life.
"Panther mummies?" Doc yelled. "We're being attacked by panther mummies?"
"My turn," Shane said as he touched his badge. One of the panther mummies bit him and he turned into a giant stone cat like creature that easily batted the panther mummies down.
"Now who's showing off?" Niko shook her head as the panther mummies turned tail.
"Gotta admit, it was impressive," Shane smiled as he changed back to his usual form.
"Big deal," Zach scoffed. "I'm still up by one."
"Oh sure, make it into a contest," Doc grumbled as they left the room. "What a wonderful way to pass the time. Are we there yet?"
"Not yet, Doc," Niko said. "This way. I thought I heard something."
"Every time you say that, trouble happens," Doc grumbled.
"Yeah but this time it's not for us," Shane pointed downwards.
They were on a balcony and below them was a large room. And in that large room were some very large elephant like creatures in bandages chasing some very familiar figures.
"I THOUGHT YOU KNEW THE WAY DOWN!" A green demon screamed. "YOU'RE AN IDIOT LARRY!"
"SHUT UP AND RUN GEORGE!" Larry the Sorcerer snapped. "UNLESS YOU WANNA END UP AS FLAT AS BOB THERE!"
"I need an aspirin…" A rather flat demon lay on the floor.
"RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! NAAAAAAHHH!" Brainchild screamed as one elephant mummy grabbed him with his trunk. "HELP!"
"First panther mummies, now elephant mummies," Shane quipped. "This guy must have liked owning a petting zoo or something."
"At least they're not trampling us," Doc sighed.
"What are Brainchild and Larry doing here?" Zach asked.
"YEOW!"
SPLAT!
"Getting their butts kicked by the sound of it," Shane grunted. "No time to fool around with them. Come on."
"We're just going to leave them?" Niko asked.
"Yes," Shane remarked. "We'll pick up what's left of them on the return trip."
"I dunno," Zach sighed. "As Galaxy Rangers we're supposed to help anyone in need."
"AAAAAHHH! OW! OW! OW! LARRY YOU MORON WHY DID YOU BRING US HERE?" The demons screamed as they were tossed around like toy balls by the giant elephants.
"YOU SAID THERE WERE STARSTONES HERE! NOT GIANT ELEPHANT MUMMIES!" Brainchild screamed as he was thrown around.
"I WANT MY MUMMY!" Larry yelled as he was hit against a wall.
"On the other hand…" Zach thought.
"These guys are real jerks," Shane finished.
"LARRY TELEPORT US OUT HERE NOW!" Brainchild screamed. Larry finally realized he could do so and did.
"Guess they didn't need our help after all," Niko blinked.
"See? Problem solved itself," Doc shrugged as he leaned back against the wall. And promptly fell through another opening. "Not agaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiinnnnnnnn!"
"Boy Doc's sure finding a lot of hidden passages," Shane said.
"Here we go again," Zach shrugged as the rangers slid down the passageway.
They landed on top of Doc. "I am not having fun on this trip!" He snapped as he got out from underneath the pile.
"Really? I kind of like it," Shane shrugged.
"You would," Doc groaned. "What fun is in this room?"
The room was filled with swinging sharp pendulums going side by side. "I had to ask," Doc sighed. "Please tell me we don't have to go through that!"
"No, we could just get burned instead," Niko used her powers to create a shield just in time to cover their backsides from a large burst of flame.
"On the other hand a nice jog will do wonders for my heart…" Doc gulped. The rangers easily managed to make it through to the other side of the room and out the door.
"That wasn't so bad," Shane said. "Compared to Wolf Den anyway."
"Are we there yet?" Doc asked.
"NOT YET DOC!" Niko shouted. "STOP ASKING ME THAT!"
They entered a large cavern filled with flowers and grass. "Okay this is a nice change of pace," Doc remarked.
"Bahh! Baahh!" A small herd of cute pink unicorns the size of sheep walked up to them.
"This is different," Zach blinked.
"If they're horses why do they sound like sheep?" Shane blinked.
"Aw they're so cute," Niko smiled. Then one of the unicorns bit her hand. "OW!"
"BAH! BAH! BAH!" The unicorns attacked the rangers.
"Great, after all the battles we've fought and defeating every other kind of villain the universe throws at us the Galaxy Rangers get done in by pint size ponies with sharp horns on their heads!" Doc snapped. "YEOW! MY BUTT!"
"THAT'S IT!" Shane touched his badge and changed his form to an energy form. The unicorns got zapped when they attacked.
"That's right! Get any closer and you're all Kentucky Fried Unicorn!" Doc snapped.
"This way!" Zach shouted as they made a break for it. They saw a large stone canoe with a lake of fire. They jumped in the canoe and began to paddle across.
"A lake of fire! Of course we have to cross a stupid lake of fire!" Doc fumed. "And how much you wanna bet in this stupid lake of stupid fire there's a stupid monster waiting to devour us all?"
"RARRR!" A thin blue dragon poked it's long head out of the fire next to Doc.
"OH SHUT UP YOU STUPID LIZARD!" Doc was fed up and smacked the creature on the snout with a stone oar.
"YIPE! YIPE! YIPE!" The dragon swam away for it's life.
"YEAH YOU'D BETTER RUN!" Doc snapped as they crossed over to the other side.
"Hey Doc you finally got one," Shane said cheerfully.
"I had to be a Galaxy Ranger!" Doc grumbled. "Couldn't be a computer therapist like my mother wanted. Nooooo! I had to seek fame and glory and adventure!"
"We're certainly getting a lot of adventure," Niko said as they entered the top half of a large room. "Hey guys, look below. We're not the only ones having a hard time."
"AAAAAAHHHH!" Mogul ran for his life with some red demons from a large rolling rock on the floor below them. "THIS WAS NOT ONE OF MY SMARTER IDEAS!"
"YOU THINK?" A red demon bellowed.
"AND TO THINK WE WANTED TO FOLLOW A MORON LIKE YOU!" Another red demon yelled.
SPLAT!
"There goes another demon pancake," Shane remarked. "What is this? A running gag?"
"Ever get the feeling you're stuck in some kind of demented cartoon universe and an even more demented author hyped up on caffeine is writing it?" Doc groaned.
"All the time," Zach agreed. "Let's go…"
"I swear if we ever get out of this alive…" Doc grumbled. However he put his hand against the wall and triggered another trap door. This time all the rangers slid downwards.
"HOW MANY TRAP DOORS ARE THERE IN THIS PLACE?" Shane shouted as they slid.
They finally ended up in a huge treasure room. "Howdy Galaxy Rangers!" Roy smiled as he displayed tons of jewels on him and his trusty sidekick Burro. "What took you so long?"
"Traffic was murder," Doc groaned.
"I tell you this is the biggest easiest treasure I ever found!" Roy smiled. "They got stars tones down here bigger than a giant's fist!"
"Easy? What about all the rocks and the spiders and the stupid unicorns and the slides and the lake of fire and all those other things running around here?" Doc yelled.
"What are you talking about? I didn't see none of those things," Roy scratched his head.
"Roy how did you avoid all those traps?" Niko blinked.
"I took the elevator," Roy pointed to an elevator door nearby. "Smoothest ride I ever had. Apparently the local emperor used it to bypass all those traps he put up."
"I can't stand it," Doc hit his head against the wall. "I just can't stand it!"