Hard Day's Sam
I'm bringin' sexy back
Them other boys don't know how to act
I think it's special, what's behind your back
So turn around and I'll pick up the slack
Sexy Back, Justin Timberlake
This story deals with Depression and Suicide. If you are considering hurting yourself, find someone to help. Call the Suicide prevention hotline 1-800-273-8255. . or friend me... CindyChamiAngel. Remember, you are not alone. You are loved, You are worthy and We need you here.
The Road so Far. Sam has just lost Sarah, Suri's mother and he is having trouble dealing with it. Suri is seeing a boy named Andy and Cass is not dealing well. Dean is recovering from his encounter with Lisa and the demon Jennifer.
"Run Sam." Dean said with a great deal of urgency.
"Are they coming?" Sam said through the heaving breath. He looked panicked and Dean couldn't say he could blame him. Of all the things they'd stumbled into.
"Yes, Sam, run!" Sam's eyes flashed like a scared horse and, though he had a stitch in his side and couldn't barely breath, he turned and ran. Dean tossed him the car keys as he fled. "It's about a mile up the road."
"You have got to be freaking kidding me!" Sam yelled as he charged down the street.
"Save you're breath for fleeing." Dean returned. At that moment, they came, running at full tilt and scream. Women, all ages and descriptions, maybe fifty of them. They stopped in front of Dean.
"Did you see a guy go through here, tall, gorgeous hair, and sexy?" Dean shook his head.
"AHHHH! There he is!" And they all took off.
"What a way to go." Dean smirked and walked to the corner to wait for Sam to return with the car.
Two days ago
Sam ate turkey bacon in Biggerson's as Dean flirted with the two girls at the table next to them. He smiled here and there, but was really rather disinterested. They weren't his type and besides he was more concerned about the case they were on. Three men dead in two days. Heart stopped while they were um... at attention.
"Dean. Focus." He said, and Dean looked at him.
"Dude, there are two of them..." Dean whispered.
"I can count. But we're working."
"Is your friend gay or something?" One of the girls asked, trying to be funny.
"No, my girlfriend died about six weeks ago." Sam blurted. He stood suddenly and went to the bathroom.
"Oh, God, I'm so sorry..." The girl was saying, but Sam didn't stop to respond. He went into the bathroom and splashed water on his face. He took a towel and dried his face and looked in the mirror. He could see the sadness in his own face. He shook it off and took a deep breath, walked back to the table. The girls were gone.
"Sorry." He said to Dean.
"No, they were out of line. You ok?" Dean asked.
"Well, you know. I just want to keep busy."
Dean nodded. "So, about these dudes. What a way to go, am I right? So we thinking Succubus?"
"Maybe, but those are generally more gradual. They like to savor their victims. This feels like something else..."
"Like?"
"I don't know. I'll have to keep looking."
Dean nodded and stood. He dropped some money on the table. "Let's get out of here."
Sam got up and followed him. As they left the two girls were near the register. They watched Sam with pity. He turned and gave them his strongest face, but could tell from their glances he had only managed pain.
It was the typical crime scene, police and forensics people everywhere. The only difference was the victim. He had an inconvenient tenting in the sheet over his body. Sam and Dean exchanged a glance at one another as he was wheeled out.
"Dan Reynolds, thirty. Accountant. Just broke up with a girlfriend."
"Anything in common with the other vics?"
"They had all lost their significant other in one way or the other." Dena looked at Sammy in horror. Sam sighed and shook his head.
"Is there a problem?" The officer asked.
"No, My girlfriend passed away recently." Sam offered.
"Well, you should probably cover another case." The officer Said and closed his notebook as he walked away.
"My thoughts exactly," Dean said.
"Dean..."
"Seriously Dude, the last thing I want to see, and I mean the very last is your tent under a sheet." Dean said.
Sam smiled a little. "I promise not to pick up any strange women for at least a week. Can we just work?"
Dean glared at him for a minute. "Fine. No chicks, man, I mean it. You are a monk..."
"Yes, Dean. What about you and Lisa?"
"Lisa was a long time ago," Dean said wistfully.
Had he not been so big a fan, the Forensics tech wouldn't have even seen the medallion. But he knew it from several photos from the internet. That was the Medallion John Lennon had gotten for making Hard Days Night. Either that or an awesome reproduction.
He had never stolen anything in his life, but like John Lennon! He slipped it in his pocket when no one was looking.
Sam got out of the shower and his phone was ringing. It was Cass. He answered it.
"The boy is here." Cass said,. His voice flat and annoyed.
"Let me guess, he's breathing and stuff and that's pissing you off?"
"Well, yes, actually. But no. She is supposed to be studying. She has Trigonometry finals next week and he is eating his third bag of potato chips."
Sam grinned.
"Get the flash cards we made and have him as her questions..."
"Couldn't I just kill him when she's not looking and bury him somewhere?"
"Goodbye, Cass. Hey, tell Suri I love her." He said. He wrapped a towel around him and walked into the other room. Dean was out on some errand or other and he had a few minutes alone. It was quiet so he turned on some music.
It struck him how all these rooms looked the same. Two beds, a small kitchen area, a crappy TV. He's spent most of his life in one. Even with Sarah. Most of their time together had been in a room like this. He'd made peace with it, but for just that second, he wished he might have had that other life.
His sadness and nostalgia depressed him even more. Darkness covered him like a wave and he sat on the bed, buried his face in his hands. It was all so futile. No matter what he did, it was for naught. Screw up after screw up. Lucifer, the Darkness. What would the world be like without Sam Winchester to screw it up?
Better. Surely.
He missed Sarah so much. Cass could handle Suri, Dean was the stronger of them. Sam stood and picked up his gun. He sat back down and looked at it. It would be so easy and there would be no way for Dean to bring him back. He could sleep. Just sleep.
The door banged open and he dropped the gun. It was Dean carrying a big box. He was smiling.
"Sammy, look what I found. Got it from the first vic's widow. She said she wanted it out of the house."
Sam's heart slowed. He hadn't even realized it was racing. He quickly picked up the gun and put it back on the dresser as he reached for his underwear.
"Let me get dressed first." He went into the bathroom and got dressed. Looking in the mirror it occurred to him how close he's been and it scared the shit out of him. He'd been depressed before but…
He went back into the other room.
"Whatcha got?"
"Looks like the first victim was a Lennon Collector."
"A communist?" Sam asked, confused.
"John." Dean offered. He sighed.
"Oh." Sam offered. Dean looked at him, there was something off.
"What is going on, Sammy?" Dean asked.
"Nothing. I'm down, Dean, I just lost someone..."
"I was there. I know, but this is more then that."
"I'm just working through it, Dean." He lied. He couldn't tell his brother what was going on. Mostly because he wasn't sure yet he wasn't going to do it. Part of him wanted to keep his options open.
In the box they found a shirt, a poster, a signed poster and a photographs and a piece of paper- a Provenance.
"What the hell is this?" Dean asked as he read it.
"It's an authentication of an artifact. Let me see. It says that this is for a medallion that Cynthia Lennon gave to John in 1968 when they were divorcing. John was very depressed and he'd had it made for her while filming Hard Days night. The one where the girls are chasing them. He apparently met Yoko Ono shortly after."
"I didn't see any jewelry. Maybe the guys ex wife kept it but when she gave me the box she seemed to just want to get rid of it. I told her it was worth a lot of money and she said it was worth it to watch him spin in his grave knowing he'd wasted all this money for something she'd just give away."
"Sounds bitter."
"Apparently his new girlfriend – old secretary was killed in a car wreck recently."
"I'm fine, Dean," Sam said, responding to his brother's tone.
"I'm just saying, you fit the profile."
"Maybe It'd be better..."
"Don't. Sammy, I will drag you back from hell and put you in the body of a cheerleader."
Sam shrugged. "I'm just so tired, Dean."
"I know. But we're here and we love you. Suri would die if she lost you. I would."
Sam nodded. Dean was unconvinced.
He'd never had any luck with girls before. He was kind of a geek in high school and not much better now. And Alison had been his college sweet heart, though apparently she now liked cops better.
He was more hurt then mad. He'd given her everything introduced her to the douche she left him for.
He sat nursing a drink when a tall bland moved up next to him.
"Have I seen you somewhere before?" She asked.
"Depends, hang out at crime scenes much?" As the words came out of his mouth, he realized they were stupid, but she didn't seem to notice.
"You want to get out of here?" She asked. He looked behind himself but not tall, ruggedly handsome guy was there.
"You talkin' to me?" He said in his best DeNiro and she giggled. "Sure," he said.
As they left the bar, she called over her friends. There were five of them.
"Um..." He said but they surrounded him and put their hands on him and suddenly he was ok with anything that was about to happen.
Sam walked into the crime scene. The room looked like there was an orgy in it. There were still women's underwear everywhere and the victim being wheeled out with the tell tale signs of a victim.
Dean shook his head. "Poor guy." He said.
"Yeah," the cop next to him snorted. "I just figured out how I want to go..."
Sam leaned over the victim and pulled back the sheet. At just that minute, a photographer backed into the gurney and it almost toppled. Sam managed to catch it and hold it upright but it took all his strength. He was so distracted he didn't see the medallion fall out of the victims shirt pocket and into his own.
"Be careful, Melvin." Someone said. The photographer apologized profusely.
"So, same thing?" Sam asked.
The detective nodded. "This guy was a loser, though. I knew him. Nice enough but he was bad with women. We were surprised his girl stayed with him that long. Now this..."
Sam nodded. "Did you find any jewelry on him?"
The cop shook his head. "Thanks," Sammy said and walked over to Dean.
"Did you find anything?" He asked. Dean shook his head.
"If he has this medallion it's not out where you can see it. We need to come back later and look around. Sam nodded.
"Breakfast?" Sam asked and Dean nodded.
They sat in the little cafe. Sam sipped coffee and looked at his laptop. He had a picture of the medallion. It was small but distinctive. One the back it was inscribed "You drive me Crazy!"
"How do you think this thing got cursed?" He asked Dean. A woman at the table across from him winked. He smiled politely and nodded.
"Who knows. Lennon was a powerful guy, part of the cultural consciousness."
"Where did you learn that term?" Sam asked.
"I saw it in a porn..."
"Really?"
"You know, there are plots. In this one a girl and her sociology teacher..."
"I'm good." Sam said. The waiter came over and put down four Mimosas in front of Sam.
"I didn't order these..." He said.
"From the ladies." Sam looked up and four women waved at him. He looked nervously at Dean. Dean looked back, puzzled.
On the street, women were stopping and staring at Sam. They waved, flirted. They blew kisses.
One woman finally got up the nerve and approached him. "Hi, handsome, wanna come to my place?"
"Um, excuse me?" He asked.
"I saw him first." Another said. A fist fight erupted. The woman started moving closer. They began to touch him and run their hands through his hair.
"Sammy. Hard Days night..."
"What?" Sam asked, looking more and more freaked out.
"Run. Seriously." Sam jumped out of his chair and ran. The woman followed, shrieking and yelling after him.
Dean dialed his brother. It took a minute but Sam finally answered.
"Where are you?" Dean asked.
"About four blocks away. There are more of them, Dean. Like fifty of them. They caught me at one point and took my jacket..."
"You must have the amulet on you..." Dean said.
"There he is!" Dean heard and Sammy's phone went off. Dean got in the car and started driving, trying to find his brother.
Sam ran as fast as he could. Some of those women were track stars, others just managed to notice him as he past. He'd feel their hands on him and his mortality would would flash before his eyes.
Periodically, he'd hear a new shriek or an argument erupt. His phone rang again. It was Dean. He began to look for a place to duck into. He saw an old auto garage and sprinted for it. He ducked inside and several of the women ran passed him. He leaned against the wall and tried to catch his breath.
He answered the phone. "Dean?"
"No, Dad..."
"Honey, I'll call you back later. I'm being chased by a hoard of women." He hung up and the phone rang again.
"Dean?"
"Yo, where are you?"
"Some auto garage."
"Doesn't narrowed it down."
"I've been kind of too busy to read signs..."
"OK, hold tight. I'm driving in that direction. I'll find you..."
"Oh, no..." Sam uttered. He hung up. Across from him was a woman. She was tall, almost six foot and obviously a body builder.
"Well, hello, sailor." She said and began walking toward him.
"You seem nice, but I..."
She lunged at him and he managed to dodge her and run out of the building. Outside, the hoard found him and he took off in the opposite direction.
Dean pulled around a corner and saw Sammy and the girl's crossing the street. For his part, Sam was giving them a good run for their money. He ran like Crowley was on his heels. Dean grabbed his phone and videoed it. Sam saw him and realized what he was doing. His face contorted into anger and he slowed, but just for a second and took off again across an alley and out of frame.
Dean's phone rang. He answered it.
Breathless puffing, then "I will kill you..." and the line went dead. Dean allowed himself a little smile and went up a block. He stopped the car and got out to go look for Sam.
His jogging was certainly paying off. Some of the women were falling off, tired, out of shape. But the ones who were keeping up were not only in good shape but cagey. One managed to cut him off and grabbed him, nearly knocking his phone out of his hand.
He spun around and she lost her hold and he doubled his speed as he pushed down the alley. His lungs burned and he was beginning to really tire. He needed to wrap this up, but how.
As he ran he patted himself down but couldn't find the medallion. He came to a street and turned and ran right into Dean who pulled him into a garage.
"How you holding up?" Dean asked.
"Bite me, Mr. Youtube..." Sam spat. He was heaving his breath. "I can't find the medallion..."
"It's got to be there somewhere. And I only sent it to Suri and Cass..."
Sam sucked in air, his side ached and he held it, tried to work out the kink. "We got to get out of here..."
Dean nodded and then he looked up.
"Ut oh." He said.
Sam looked at him, real alarm in his eyes. "What?"
"Run Sam." Dean said with a great deal of urgency.
"Are they coming?" Sam said through the heaving breath. He looked panicked and Dean couldn't say he could blame him. Of all the things they'd stumbled into.
"Yes, Sam, run!" Sam's eyes flashed like a scared horse and, though he had a stitch in his side and couldn't barely breath, he turned and ran. Dean tossed him the car keys as he fled. "It's about a mile up the road.
"You have got to be freaking kidding me!' Sam yelled as he charged down the street.
"Save you're breath for fleeing." Dean returned. At that moment, they came, running at full tilt and scream. Women, all ages and descriptions, maybe fifty of them. They stopped in front of Dean.
"Did you see a guy go through here, tall, gorgeous hair, and sexy?" Dean shook his head.
"AHHHH! There he is!" And they all took off.
"What a way to go." Dean smirked and walked to the corner to wait for Sam to return with the car.
Sam slowed the car just enough for Dean to jump in and as soon as his brother was in, before the door was closed, he took off again like something out of a Steve McQueen movie. His face was pale and he had that shuddery breathing he always had after a close call.
He didn't stop of even slow down until they were at the motel.
Inside, he locked and barricaded the door. He looked out the window. No women.
"That looks like more fun in the movies." He finally said and began to pat his clothes.
"Take 'em off." Dean said and Sam slid took of his tie and threw it to Dean. He unbuttoned the top buttons of his shirt and slid it off and as he did, the Medallion fell out of his pocket. Dean reached for it.
"Don't" Sam said. Dean stopped and Sam grabbed a fork from the kitchen and a paper bag. Carefully, he lifted the medallion off the floor and into a bag.
"What?" Dean asked.
"I don't even want to think about your tent pole..." Sam said.
Sam entered the bunker with the bag. Suri came out and threw herself into his arms.
"I think this is the only female attention I can handle for a while", he said and hugged her back, lifted her off the ground. "I missed you."
Cass stood behind her. "You have to tell us the story."
"Later. I'm exhausted and I need a shower. Can I have a few hours?"
"Sure, Dad. I'll make something that tastes bad for dinner." He smiled and kissed her cheek.
He went into his bedroom and dropped his bag and the medallion to the floor. He sat on his bed and the grief and sadness overwhelmed him. He cried, buried his face in his hands and let the blackness wash over him. He picked up his .45 again.
Dean came in. He smiled at Suri. "You're dad is a rock star. Where is he?"
"He said he wanted to get some sleep and asked not to be disturbed." Dean looked up, alarmed. He dropped his stuff and ran to Sammy's room. He cracked the door.
"Yeah. It's just so hard." Sam was saying to someone. Dean leaned in and saw his brother sitting on his bed, his face wet with emotion. He was clutching the phone. "I just don't know what to do."
"I've been there." Said a voice on the speaker. "But you have people who love you. Your daughter sounds amazing." he said.
"She is." He agreed.
"Can you imagine what it would do to her to lose both of you? And you're brother. He sounds like a real great guy. But he needs you Sammy. And your friend, Cass. I know it seems really dark right now, Sammy. But you have a lot to life for."
"I know. It's just...I feel so alone."
"I'm going to stay here with you as long as you need." She said. Dean moved in to the room and sat down on the bed next to Sam. He put his arm around his shoulder.
"Me too." Dean said. Sam smiled through the tears and then he cried out the pain.
When you try your best, but you don't succeed
When you get what you want, but not what you need
When you feel so tired, but you can't sleep
Stuck in reverse
And the tears come streaming down your face
When you lose something you can't replace
When you love someone, but it goes to waste
Could it be worse?
Lights will guide you home
And ignite your bones
And I will try to fix you
And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth
Fix you – Coldplay
You are not alone...