By My Side

Humming and butterflies were figments of her imagination, just as was with the hand that would sometimes hold hers, or stroke her cheek so gently…and the flash of blue eyes staring at her was just a dream she had when she was awake. Kairi-Namine One-shot.

Disclaimer: I don't own Kingdom Hearts.

Lying wide awake in her bed, she stared up at the ceiling with wide, wise eyes. The four walls surrounding her added to the darkness and smallness of the room, and seemed to make it just a bit hard to breath. Her lips remained parted, but she didn't bother to lick them wet once more, she thought she was too tired.

It seemed she was always tired lately, her eyelids heavy and her mind and thoughts slow and sluggish. Sora and Riku often expressed their concern to her, seeing the darkening bags under her eyes, but she just wasn't able to sleep most nights. Sora and Riku had offered to sleep with her, to try and help, but she always insisted that they stay in their bed. She wasn't really all too sure if sleeping together like they used to, cuddling beside each other for warmth and holding hands, would help sleep come to her.

Truthfully, though, she loved to watch them sleep. Lying on her own mattress, she'd turn her head and see them sharing the other bed, Sora safely tucked under Riku's arm, and Riku's head against Sora's. Of course, she could only watch them if they were sharing the room. Now that they traveled, it was one hotel room after another, and though they usually shared a room, sometimes she would urge them to get their own room for once.

On the occasions that she was alone, she would lie in bed awake, and stare up at the ceiling as she was now, and try to count the images of butterflies she sometimes thought she saw on the ceiling. Fluttering, silent wings of shadows that simply floated along the ceiling, to disappear in the corners where shadows were the darkest. Sometimes…she would have conversations with herself in her head, and usually, the topic was either her lack of sleep, or doubts of her sanity. Seeing butterflies was evidence of that thought, and as though to deepen this thought, the girl could swear that sometimes she heard humming.

The noise would be soft and gentle, breezy-like, and float through one ear and out the other as it imprinted itself in her memory. It was familiar even, and though it was so whispery, she was sure the voice was a girl's. She would hear it so suddenly; it was like a shock through her system, even though it was so quiet and soft. But though it was beautiful, it was haunting as well, and sometimes she would find herself breathless listening to it, or she would feel a strange emptiness in her chest that would slowly fill till she felt warm.

But on a few occasions, the sound had surprised her, and she had begun screaming in terror while clutching at her ears, pulling at her hair and scratching her ears as the sound continued to flow throughout her thoughts. Riku and Sora, if they were sharing the room with her, would wake and rush to her side, and try to pull her out of her nightmare-ish state. But when Sora would grasp her hand tightly as Riku asked her what had made her scream, she would only shake her head, and stare blankly at the floor.

And then there were times where she would strive to hear the sound of the humming, and would anxiously lie in bed, gripping the pillow or blankets with her hands till she thought she would go crazy. It was usually on the knights she craved it that it never came, and she would only stay awake the entire night to sit up the next morning with dark marks under her eyes worse than yesterday's.

Turning over onto her side, she blindly fingered the corner of the pillow, before tracing random designs into the soft fabric of it that only her mind's eye could see. The air in the room was cold, yet she didn't pull the blankets tighter around her body. She simply stared into nothingness, darkened, shadowed, nothingness.

She was never restless, never tossing and turning in bed. She just simply couldn't sleep. It was strange and tiring even, but no matter how hard she tried to sleep, or how tired she became, she could never fall into the slumber she so hungered for. If she could just sleep, she often told herself, she would be happy. But even if she did sleep, she couldn't remember it. Riku would sometimes sit on the edge of her bed, his hand on hers, and when she flashed her eyes open, he would tell her that she'd been sleeping. She would only look around in confusion, and realize that the dark corners and walls of the room she remembered just moments ago, were now brightened by sunlight.

Sighing quietly, she closed her eyes for a moment, and felt a strange flutter run through her body. Opening her eyes once more, she tried to focus her gaze on the moving shadows along the walls, only to recognize them as the butterflies from her imagination. She took in a quiet breath, and turned over onto her back once again, her arms resting peacefully at her sides above the blankets. Watching a particularly small shadow flitter up to the ceiling and circle, she couldn't help but think that the shadow's wings were a bit torn, and that one wing's beat seemed to be off from the other. Her mind seemed to give her the image of a butterfly that had escaped from a bird.

Feeling a little remorseful for the injured butterfly, she tilted her head just ever so slightly, and lifted her right hand slightly, so that because of her point of view, it looked as though she was extending her hand to the little shadow. But much to her amazement and surprise, the little shadow circled around her fingers on the ceiling, before flitting downwards to land on the back of her hand. Eyes widening, she took in a sharp breath as the little shadow seemed to inspect its perch, before fluttering its wings slowly, to reveal a metallic sheen of blue and purple, along with black along its wings and body. Pulling her hand closer, she inspected the small butterfly with incredulous eyes, and blinked.

Opening her eyes, she realized she was staring at nothing, and she blushed slightly. "I really am going crazy…" she murmured, pulling her hand back down to rest on the bed blankets. Closing her eyes, she wanted to try and see if she could trick herself into sleeping, but before she could feel slumber's slender fingers around her body, a soft noise filled her mind. The humming had started. Opening her eyes once again, almost sadly, she turned over on her side, and pulled the blankets up to her chin. Now she really wouldn't be able to even try and sleep. She would lie awake listening to that melody, forever engraving itself into her mind. That was how it was with the song.

But much to her amazement, she found herself begin to hum the melody as well. It wasn't really strange for her to hum it, but every other time she'd begun to sound the melody from her throat, it was often during her and her companions' traveling hours. Sora would sometimes walk beside her instead of Riku to listen to the melody, and he'd even tried to hum it a few times, only to stumble over a note.

He would then laugh, and tell her she was pretty amazing for coming up with a melody like that, and still be able to hum it without ever messing up once. Riku would then usually laugh as well, and tell Sora that he just didn't know how to carry a tune. She would crack a smile, and just continue to hum the melody that had stolen her heart…which wouldn't be the first time it had been stolen. This time though, the captor was much safer, at least she hoped so.

But never had she tried to hum the melody before while the true humming was taking place. But the other voice humming didn't falter, and she continued, matching note for note, and feeling a soft vibration in her throat on the lower notes. As she hummed, she felt a dip in the bed mattress, as though someone had just lain down beside her. But when she turned slightly to glance over her shoulder, no one was there. But the humming continued, and she did as well.

As the two voices dipped, she stopped for just a second to take in a small breath, but before she could begin again, she felt the strangest feeling she could have ever thought to feel…but it felt so familiar and warm…It felt as though a hand had grasped hers. When she tried to turn again though, she stopped herself, and just kept her back to whomever or whatever was holding her hand. She liked the feeling, and the calmness it brought with it—even if it was just her imagination again.

When the song ended, she took in a slow, deep breath, only to hear another breathing beside her, and she could even feel their hot breath on the back of her neck. Her heart began to race, and she felt a hand with soft, warm fingers gently brush the red hair away from her ear, to be replaced by a pair of lips. "You're not sleeping…" a small, gentle, overly familiar voice said.

That was when she fully turned around, clutching at the hand holding hers tightly so as to not dare let go. But the sight that met her eyes made her blink twice in amazement. Ruffled blonde hair, blue eyes, pale porcelain skin, and a white dress. The girl was too familiar to be real, she couldn't really be there. It had to be her mind playing tricks on her.

"You need to sleep, so I'll help you, okay?" the girl asked with a cute smile.

All she could do was nod, still not believing her eyes and settling for it all being her imagination. Lying down again, this time facing the girl, she noticed something odd. For every few moments, it seemed as though the image of the girl seemed to flicker, or become brighter, or even a bit translucent. But though her eyes didn't seem very reliable at the moment, she did know that the feeling she felt in her hand at that moment was real. At least, she hoped it was.

The girl smiled at her, and lowered herself beside the other girl, and gently reached out with her free hand to gently stroke the tired girl's eyebrow. Pale fingers skirted down sun-bronzed skin, and then gently brushed back the long strands of raspberry colored locks. The girl then began humming again, but it was a new melody, one that seemed to be more of a lullaby than anything else.

As the hours wore on, she felt herself becoming even more tired than she'd ever been before, but for once, her eyelids were growing heavy as well. The pale body beside her just kept humming, smiling, and caressing her cheek. She thought she even saw the butterflies begin to disappear, closing their wings in sleep, and remaining in the shadowed corners of the room. But then the girl stopped, and removed her hand from her face. She also broke the grip they had on each other's hands, and instead cupped bronzed cheeks, before leaning forward, and placing her pale pink lips on the other girl's.

But from the kiss, peaceful darkness clouded her vision, and she felt herself fall into a deep slumber. In her dreams, she saw two girls in a meadow filled with white flowers and butterflies. One girl was clad in a white dress, and had long, ruffled blonde hair, and the other was…herself.

For some reason, someone was shaking her…shaking her shoulder to be more specific. Cracking open her eyes, she glared up at the silver haired boy who was gazing down at her with a surprised look on his face. Sora was behind Riku, looking on worriedly. When he saw she'd woken up, he smiled gratefully. "Kairi!" he exclaimed, hurrying to her side and staring at her with friendly affection, "We were really worried. Riku said when he came in; you were asleep and wouldn't even wake up when he touched your hand. But when I came in awhile ago, you were still asleep, so we've been really concerned. I even thought you were dead," the keyblade master admitted, rubbing the back of his head.

"Wha?" Kairi mumbled, sitting up in bed, and looking towards the window whose curtains had been opened to allow the afternoon sunlight to filter in through the windows. She'd been asleep…this entire time. She even felt rested, and refreshed…until she remembered. Looking up quickly, she gazed around the room, looking for something…or someone. "Where's…" she began, before remembering that it couldn't have been her…It was impossible.

"Where's what Kairi?" Riku asked, looking at her with curiosity. His jade eyes then widened a bit in realization, and he picked something up off of the nightstand. "Do you mean this?" the boy asked, handing the paper to the girl who took it as though in a daze. "I found it in your hand this morning, and the pencil was left right by your pillow. Were you sleep-sketching?" the tall boy joked, grinning down at her.

Kairi didn't respond, only looked at the drawing on the paper with widened eyes. The marks were sketchy, yet made with delicate care. It was a little butterfly, its wings looking slightly ripped as though it'd escaped from a bird. And though the drawing was only in graphite gray, Kairi knew the colors of the wings within the black marking the outlines and designs: purple and blue. And after looking a little closer, she realized that two designs looked oddly familiar, and were in the shape of two letters. An 'N' and a 'K'.

'Namine...'

Smiling warmly, Kairi brought the drawing close, and closed her eyes as she breathed in deeply. "Just my imagination, Riku," the girl replied, wondering if last night had really been real.

Fin