Truth
Summary: She loved him, loved him like no other. All her life she had wanted him to be hers. But on facing reality, she knew that to loving someone, it's best if you just let go.
A/N: Okay people..here's how it goes. I don't really hate Kikyou, and I don't really hate anybody. This is just how the story goes, and if you don't like it, you don't have to read it. I'm sorry if you think that this one shot is going in a bad direction, I'm sorry if you don't like the couple or pairing. But this is how this one shot goes.
Watching you...
Kikyou stood under a dead cherry blossom tree, gazing at the hanyou that had caught her attention.
Inuyasha.
She loved him so much, the way his silky silver hair swayed against the wind. How his dark amber eyes had warmed up to the falling snow. How much she had wanted to just rush over to him, and feel his warm skin on hers. How much she had wanted to wrap her fingers around his cheeks and give him a kissing of his life time.
But she knew that she could never do that..
She was dead.
She couldn't be brought back to life..it wasn't even possible. Unless..she had the Shikon no Tama. But she didn't..the feud with Naraku had ended so long ago. Inuyasha had gotten hold of the jewel, and she was so surprised on how he didn't change himself into a full demon. Instead, the wish he had was totally unselfish.
He had wished for whatever destruction that Naraku had placed, be revived. And that the harmony with human and demons join together.
She never though that he would be like that.
Kikyou had wanted to be the one to change him. And she could've..if only the past hadn't been so horrible. Knowing how Naraku had made her believe that Inuyasha had deceived her, broke her heart. Or..if she still had one.
She wanted to be everything to him, the one he could count on, the one he would go to when he was sad, the one he could leash his anger out at..the one he could love. But it didn't happen..she wasn't the one to change him for who he was today. She wasn't the one who had supported him through out the whole ordeal.
It was her..
Kagome.
Her stupid reincarnation.
How she despised the child. Taking away her loved one..taking away the person that she had truly loved through out her whole life. If she still had a life. So many 'if's'. And only could they go on forever.
She could even remember Inuyasha back then.
A fool.
A idiot.
A bastard.
A dog.
But all those things..they belonged to her. He was her fool, her idiot, her bastard, her dog. And he would've still been. If she wasn't so simple minded..if she had taken herself to learn the facts. Maybe she wouldn't have made her decisions in fury..maybe she wouldn't have killed herself..maybe she would've still had Inuyasha.
She knew she brought it onto herself.
She knew that she was the one who killed herself.
She knew that she had wasted her own powers to have Inuyasha sealed to a tree.
She knew that she was the one who had acted on rash actions.
She knew that she was the one who let her love go.
She couldn't bare it anymore..she loved Inuyasha so much. The way he had kissed her so long ago..so very long ago. The soft warm lips of his that tasted like sweet cherries. He had been amazing..the way he held her, the way he made her feel. Kikyou had never believed in love..but he was the one who had showed her.
Why couldn't they be together?
Kikyou felt herself snort into the wind.
She was dead, she wasn't human anymore. Her whole body ached to know that Inuyasha hadn't even used the jewel to revive her. Was it possible that he had moved on? But he had told her that he still loved her..Still loved her. If only those words were true.
She knew that it wasn't all her fault.
It was Kagome.
Kagome and her scent. Kagome and her seduction. Kagome who had wanted to steal Inuyasha away from the first time she had saw him. Kikyou knew that Kagome was a jealous girl, Kikyou knew that everytime Inuyasha chose her over the bitch that she would get really mad. Kikyou loved it when Inuyasha came to her instead of the horrible little creature.
Even if she was her reincarnation, she would never be a third of Kikyou herself. Kikyou had more power, had more skills, and she was sure that she had more of a sweet kiss. If only Inuyasha could see behind that barriers that were blocking them though. If only Inuyasha could remember back to how much he had loved her. Loved Kikyou.
Why couldn't he?
Kikyou felt her whole body shake as she felt a warm pair of blue eyes stare at her. Kagome.
--
"Kikyou" Kagome said quietly as she walked over to the dead priestess.
She had seen her from a far, watching the hanyou who had been oblivious to the presence of the dead. She was glad though, she didn't want Inuyasha to get hurt so many times over and over again. She couldn't stand that way he would watch the dead priestess with undying love..but did he really love her? How many countless times did he confess to herself also?
Many..
"You know it" Replied the cold women in front of her.
"What?"
"You took him away from me."
"You're the one who wanted to kill him! You're the one who wanted him to go to hell with you. Do you think that he would've been happy? Knowing that he was going to die with you when he wasn't ready?" Kagome felt her own voice trembling.
"You don't know anything..he kissed me. He told me that he had wanted to go down with me"
"You manipulated him, you made him think that he still loved you. You knew that he was under a illusion!" She snapped back, her voice holding all the emotions of anger.
"You have no right to bud into that business, he would've came with me, and we would've been happy.." Kikyou said harshly as her brown eyes pierced through her own. "He loved me first. And even if he did have any feelings for you, it would've been because of me..you only reminded him of me"
Kagome bit back a gasp, she had thought about the same thing countless nights before. Did Inuyasha really love her? Or was she only a reincarnation of his beloved Kikyou.
"You're dead..you don't deserve his love. He cried so many times for you...and all you did was push him back. And now that he's finally moved on, you want him back? It's too late Kikyou" Kagome found herself saying.
It was true. Inuyasha had cried for the dead priestess. She thought that Inuyasha would've only cried for Kagome..herself. But he didn't..he had to cry for the dead girl. Kagome thought that it would've been the only thing she had of Inuyasha, his tears..the tears that fell for her. But now, she knew that it would fall for Kikyou too.
"Stop pulling him along, you know that he never had true feelings for you" Kikyou leashed out as she watched the priestess walk up to her.
And as Kikyou stood in front of her, she could see Kikyou's hand rising up. "You don't understand anything. Inuyasha..he..what we shared was different. We actually had love..not whatever you're having with him"
Before Kagome could answer, she felt the stinging pain on her left cheek.
And before she knew it, the tears were coming easily. She was crying..crying after several minutes of the conversation. She knew that she had feelings for Inuyasha..ever since she had met him she knew. Knew that he would be the one. But she would never encounter that he had loved Kikyou first.
Kagome raised her head slowly to see Kikyou raise her hand, but before the priestess could lay another impact on her, a strong arm and quickly appeared and stopped her.
Gasping softly, Kagome turned her head to see Inuyasha stand next to her. All Kagome could do was give a big sob before finding herself in the arms of Inuyasha, and feeling the quickening of his beating heart. The tears wouldn't stop as Kagome found herself hugging Inuyasha with what ever strength she had.
"Shhh" Inuyasha whispered to her before stroking her hair softly. How she loved the softness of his voice.
--
Kikyou couldn't believe what she saw.
Inuyasha was protecting the girl in front of her, what was he doing? He was comforting Kagome instead of her? He was whispering soft words to the little bitch instead of her?
What was wrong with him?
Kikyou couldn't help but feel a dull ache in her heart. She would never have Inuyasha could she? Didn't he know how much she had loved him? Loved him enough to sacrifice her shards for him. Loved him to almost give her life to save his? Kikyou would've done anything to get him back..but here he was now..pushing her away.
"Why?"
"I'm sorry" Was all the hanyou could say.
"Don't you love me anymore? I alw-always thought th-that we had a connection.."
"I'm sorry" Came his reply again, "Maybe once Kikyou..I thought that I did love you. But did you trust me? You thought that I would harm you...I told you back then that I had loved you. And then when you got hurt, you thought that I did it. You didn't even go to the thought that it might've been some one else posing as me..."
"Inu-"
"No don't...I know what I'm doing. If you did love me, you would've believed my words, you wouldn't have killed yourself to seal me to that stupid tree.." Inuyasha started trailing off, but he continued slowly, "She changed me..and no, I don't see her as you. Kagome's different. She's bubble, fun, kind, warm, and sometimes a bit annoying"
"But..she's me.." Kikyou said softly, before looking into the warm hanyou's eyes.
"No..you think she's you. But she's different. Kagome is her own person..and she doesn't deserve to be reminded that she was a part of you. She should be known as her own self" She could see that Inuyasha was growing frustrated now, "I'm sorry..but she..Kagome changed me into a person that I thought I would never would've been.."
"What ar-?"
"Don't you see? I'm not nice..I don't smile..and I'm suppose to laugh at all the killings. But Kagome..she made me see that everything I did was wrong, she taught me to care..taught me to learn what love really is..I'm sorry that you don't see this my way" Inuyash was struggling with his words now, it seems like he would find what to say.
"But you loved me..you said you loved me" Kikyou cried, she couldn't bare it anymore..she knew he did..he did!
"I know I said it..and I do. Atleast..a part of me..but that part is gone now..and maybe someday I would remember what we had, but we can't be together"
"Inuyasha.."
"I'm sorry Kikyou" And with that, she watched as his beloved hanyou left with her reincarnation in his arms.
Kikyou felt whatever left of her spirit break. So Inuyasha didn't love her anymore? But he said that he did..atleast a apart of him. Kikyou felt herself going against all his words. But before she could, another part of herself pushed her to see. See what really what love was. Pushed her to see through her denial.
And before she knew it, Kikyou understood.
She knew that she loved Inuyasha, she always would. But he didn't feel that same way for her anymore..atleast..not now..or ever into the future.
He loved Kagome..and she couldn't replace that little..bi-..the girl.
And maybe..if he was happy..she could be too, knowing that all she had to do was see him smile each day. Even if it was her that let the smile go in place.
Just let it go...
"Inuyasha?" Kagome whispered quietly as she was being held in her loves arm tightly. They had started walking back to the village now, and the winter air was getting cold.
"Hmh?"
"Did you really mean what you said back there?" Kagome couldn't make herself meet his gaze, she wanted to know..
"Don't look away from me baby" Inuyasha murmured as he stopped walking and tilted her chin to make her look at him. She couldn't feel it before, but now she could feel her own wet tears.
"I loved Kikyou..but that was the past..and this is now. It's time to let go, and I know that I love you. And I will until my heart stops beating, and maybe to the other world..if I even live past that" He said all in one breath before giving a gentle kiss on her lips.
"I love you" Kagome whispered, her heart pounding hard to the sound of his confession.
And before they knew it, they were kissing hard, and nothing could stop what they felt about each other. Each kiss, each touch, each moment together was like a dream come true. And they knew that no matter what happened, their love would go on..go on for eternity, until there was no eternity left.
And as Kagome and Inuyasha walked back to the village.
A pair of understanding eyes were looking at their departing backs.