Author's Note: Hey guys! I'm back and ready for more. Hope you guys are as well. Thanks to my beta, Ginny Guerra, for all her great work. Per her advice, I will say here and now that in my storyverse, James was born in 2002, which makes him three years older than his next sibling. Please enjoy!
February 11th, 2021
Ginny Potter walked slowly up and down the hallway, pausing every time she passed the closed door; sometimes for a moment or two, girding her courage to finally step through it, and sometimes for less than a second, putting it behind her as quickly as she could. The healers and their assistants moved around her with ease, paying no mind anymore to the pacing woman with bloodshot eyes grazing outside the Special Care Infant Ward. She had been there for three days now.
What is wrong with you? She scolded herself, shivering slightly as she paused outside the door again. That is your flesh and blood in that room, fighting for survival, fighting for breath every minute. You're telling me you can't walk through a bloody door?!
The heartbreak of seeing that tiny, innocent little girl surrounded by the protection of an Incubation Charm, being kept alive only through a series of spells and potions, would be crushing, but Ginny also knew that not going in and seeing her, especially if the worst came to pass, would be fatal.
Placing her hand on the doorknob, Ginny looked up to the ceiling.
"Please give me strength," she whispered, hoping her mother-in-law could hear her as she opened the door. "Make me strong, like you were."
Harry, her mother, the healers...everyone had told her what to expect when she saw the baby for the first time. There would be floating orbs all around the girl for monitoring and charmed quills and parchment keeping track of vitals; the lights would be dimmed because her eyesight was too weak for brightness; the room itself would reek of antiseptic to keep any stray germs away. It had been drilled into her relentlessly by everyone, the shocking environment she was about to see.
They had missed things, though. No one had told her about the Cleaning Charm that was cast on her the moment she stepped through the barrier, which left her feeling cold and prickly, or how loud the beeps were in the complete stillness of the room. Her soft footsteps echoed as if she were banging on a drum the closer she walked towards the bubble resting on small pyre, a tiny sacrifice of some barbaric nature. Finally, Ginny was close enough to look down at the baby.
She had been wrong. Heartbreak wasn't a strong enough word.
The still-nameless girl was barely the length of Ginny's hand. There was no hair on her head, and there also was no way to tell her eye color because they were guarded with a mask to shield them from the dim light. There was barely anything to her except bones, and the tears slipped down Ginny's cheeks as she realized she could easily count every single rib on the child's body. The hardest thing, the thing no one had told her about, was the breathing. Every breath the baby forced into and out of her body used her every muscle and reverberated raggedly through the incubator and the room.
She was incomplete and ill-prepared to face the world. Something, some force had pushed her out of her mother's body before she was ready for life on the outside and this was the result: a shriveled, miniature being, pale except for the bright veins easily seen through her translucent skin, and so fragile that she would probably break in half if anyone dared cuddle her close.
Slowly, Ginny eased herself down into the rocking chair, suddenly exhausted, and as often happens with exhaustion, honesty followed with it.
"I'm sorry," Ginny heard herself whisper to the baby. "I'm so sorry I haven't been in here until now. I was…I was selfish. I cared more about how it would make me feel to see you than about if you needed me to be here so you could get strong. I'm so sorry, darling girl. I love you very much. Please forgive me."
There was no answer from the baby. Ginny wondered darkly if she would ever answer anyone.
"Now, I know you have a lot of healers and people coming in and out of here, taking…taking your blood, taking your temperature, trying to get you to eat so you probably don't want to give anyone anything else—especially someone who was too much of ninny to come and sit with you until now—but I need you to do something for me, okay? Are you listening? You need to get better right now-" Ginny burst into tears, hunching over as her sobs consumed her.
This was why; this was why no one had pushed Ginny to come into the room until now. They all knew that she wasn't strong enough emotionally after the last few days—hell, the last few months—to be able to handle this with anything close to control. Not to mention she had slept maybe five hours out of seventy-two and only ate a few bites a day under her mother's stern gaze. It was no wonder her healer was threatening to admit her all over again.
"I'm sorry," she apologized after a few moments. "I s-shouldn't do that in front of you. I'm far too noisy when I cry. Your daddy says I sound like Hagrid's old friend Fluffy when I get going like this."
It might have been nothing, but Ginny was positive a small fist twitched when she had said, "daddy". Gathering herself together, she leaned closer until her hand rested on the incubator opposite the baby's.
"Please, please get better. Your daddy…He is as strong a man as I've ever known. He's kind and crazy, and pigheaded and foolish, but most of all he's so strong. He's proved that in spades since you were born. If you…If you don't get better, though, he won't be strong anymore. He won't be anything anymore. He will not survive losing you. None of us will. We'll all be different people if we don't get to bring you home to spoil like a rotten apple. And we will. We will love you with every ounce of ourselves and we will get you anything you could ever need or want, but you have to be the one to get better. You have to be the one who finds it in you to fight even though it…it must hurt you terribly right now. It's unfair, I know, to lay so much on your shoulders. None of this has been fair to any of us, especially to you, but just because something isn't fair doesn't mean that we can throw our hands up in the air and be done with it. We're Potters. We don't do that kind of thing. We go on, no matter what life throws at us. It's hard, though, trust me. You should have seen me a few months ago when you unexpectedly—very, very, very unexpectedly—came into our lives…"
September 1st, 2020
King's Cross Station never changed, not entirely. The Muggles they passed on the way to Platform 9 ¾ seemed to be getting plumper as the years went on and some of the clothing they wore seemed more appropriate for a house of ill-repute than for waiting for a train, but dear old King's Cross itself always stayed loud and sooty and alive with excitement every September first for as long as Ginny could remember.
It was bittersweet being here. It always was, saying goodbye to one's children for months at a time, but now especially when it was one of the children's last trip to Hogwarts.
"Mum? Hey, Mum?"
Ginny shook herself out of her reverie to glance over at her youngest son.
"What is it, Al?"
"You looked far away, that's all."
"I'm fine, sweetheart." She squeezed him close. "It's just always difficult to say goodbye, especially when it's all three of you now."
They both looked over to see Lily and her cousin, Hugo, waiting impatiently for Lily's friend, Gigi, to be released from her mother's tight hold. Smiling to herself, Ginny strolled over with Al to aid the situation.
"Nell?" Ginny said to the other mother. Her old friend didn't look up while Gigi pleaded up to Ginny with her eyes for help with escape. "Let her go. She's going to be just fine at school."
Nell sniffed and slowly eased her youngest out of her grasp, keeping a firm grip on her daughter's shoulder with one hand and stroking the girl's chestnut hair with the other. "You're leaving me. I…I can't believe it; especially after all I went through for you. I was in labor with you for thirty-nine hours."
"It was only seven," Ginny chimed in.
"The healers begged me to take something for the pain, but I wouldn't because I didn't want you be harmed by it."
"They begged you to stop telling them what to do."
"I couldn't walk for days afterwards."
"No, her father couldn't because of where your stunner hit him when you found out what he had named her after you passed out. Coincidentally, that's also probably why she's your youngest."
"You are not helping me," Nell growled in Ginny's direction.
"I'm not trying to. I'm trying to get you to let your daughter go and get a start on the best years of her life with the rest of her friends."
"She'll be fine, Aunt Nell," Al added. "James and I will keep an eye on her and Lily, make sure they don't burn the kitchens up over there."
"Oh you're a good boy, Albus." Nell reached up and mushed his cheeks together with her hand. "You're my favorite of your mother's children. Not like this one over here." She glared jokingly at a smiling Lily. "This one is stealing my little dove from me without the slightest bit of guilt, aren't you, dear?"
"Yes, ma'am," Lily nodded promptly while Hugo snickered beside her.
"What did we do," Nell asked Ginny as she reluctantly let her daughter go off with her friends, "to have such impossible, maddening children as the ones we do?"
"I haven't the slightest idea," Ginny replied, watching as Al walked over to his trolley to check the cage of his cat, Dickens, once again. "I suppose we just got very lucky."
"I suppose you're right. Where did everyone else run off to? It's almost eleven."
"Well, Ron went off to have words with all of the boys in Rose's year and above so naturally-"
"Rose and Hermione are following him with profuse apologies. And our fair husbands?"
"I believe Harry went with Bart on his way to question the train conductor about his years of experience operating the vehicle your daughter will be boarding soon." Nell choked back another small sob and Ginny wrapped an arm around her. "She will be perfectly fine, I promise."
"I know she will be. She's wonderful and brave and smart; she's so smart, Ginny, but she's young, too. Why does she need to go off to school so far away from us? Sophie never wanted to go to Hogwarts, even with all of James's letters and stories."
"Because Gigi is her own person, just the way you and Bart raised her to be. Be proud of her. How many children are smart enough and mature enough that Hogwarts will let them join in their second year?"
"You mean how many are willful enough that they spend nearly a whole year writing to the Headmaster and breaking down their poor parents' defenses?"
"That as well. I know you don't believe me, but after a little while, once you're used to how quiet the house is and how much more free time you have a part of you is really going to enjoy this. That's how it was for me and Harry last year when Lily was gone with the boys. Then just when you're used to it, summer comes around and your children are fighting in your living room like feral cats over what to listen to over the wireless."
Nell sniffed and dabbed her eyes. "It's just that Gigi's my baby, just like Sophie is; just like your three are for you and Rose and Hugo are for Hermione. They grow up and get taller, but it still feels like they belong in your arms. I don't care if it's at six months or sixty years…"
"It hurts to let them go. You know what though?"
"What?"
"We still have to. The worst part of the job, bar none, but it has to be done."
"Speaking of the worst parts of raising children," Nell said, glancing up at the clock, "I believe it's your turn to go and track down our oldest ones."
"No, no," Ginny argued. "I strongly dispute that. Three days ago at the barbeque, remember? I'm the one who found them at the lake; nestled up against that tree and each other even more. Ergo, it's your turn this time."
"Ah, but you are forgetting about the day after Al's birthday party."
Ginny shut her eyes. "Please don't remind me."
"I think I will. Early morning, the sun just starting to peek up over the horizon, I go out to the yard to squawk at an offending blue jay only to find two pairs of bare feet hanging out of the door to the tree house my husband built with his bare hands. What your son and my daughter were using that tree house for all night was not what Bart had anywhere near his mind for its use, so I wisely and mercifully woke them up and scurried James home before my husband woke up. You and I agreed that counted for three turns. Ergo, it's your turn."
"Right." Ginny patted Nell's hand in thanks. "You know I was lying before, right? About us being lucky?"
"Of course you were."
Ginny hadn't been lying and she knew that. Making her way through the crowds on the platform, she knew how blessed she and Harry were for their three children, as difficult as they could all be at times. Thankfully for every window they broke and tantrum they threw, there had been double the smiles and double the cuddles for comfort after a bad dream. They were miracles; James, Albus, and Lily were the true miracles in her life.
If only it didn't take a miracle for James to keep his lips off of Sophie's when they were together, she thought tiredly, finally spotting the twosome leaning against a secluded brick wall.
"Ahem." Ginny cleared her throat loudly and the teenagers immediately untangled themselves, red-faced and hair disheveled. James recovered first and gave his mother a broad grin, his eyes sparkling mischievously. Ignoring his antics, she glanced at Sophie. "Your mother was looking for you, dear."
"Okay. I'll, uh, go find her. Make sure she hasn't latched an invisible leash on to Gigi or anything crazy," the girl said, smoothing down her dark curls. She had only taken two steps before James tugged her back and planted another kiss on her.
"James Sirius!"
After another quick peck, he let Sophie go off, her eyes never meeting Ginny's as she hurried away. James casually leaned back against the wall.
"We were just saying goodbye, Mum."
"Really? That's what your tongue was doing down her throat?"
"Do you want the honest answer?" he asked, smiling slyly.
"James, this is not funny. There are children around here and their parents, some of whom I work with." She rubbed a hand down her face, taking a deep breath before continuing. "I know that you and Sophie have a…an adult relationship now. You're both separated most of the year, so I think I've given you a lot of leeway this summer. Mostly because you're of age now and I'm trying to respect that, but son, you need to start acting like an adult if you want me to keep treating you like one."
His face softened and even though it was impossible, Ginny saw such sharp traces of Harry in her son that made her heart sputter.
"I'll try. I will. I know you and Dad are worried that I haven't picked a career path yet-"
"That's not what this is about. Although, truthfully, you will put a halt to some of your father's late night pacing if you do."
"I promise I'll sit down with Nev – I mean, with Headmaster Longbottom this week and start getting a plan together for after graduation. That's important to me. It's just that Sophie is too."
"I know she is."
"Do you…Do you know how important exactly?"
"I know how bright your smile is when you see her walk into a room, and that you go dress shopping with her even though it drives you batty. I also know about a conversation you had with your father last week that I wasn't supposed to know about yet."
"Of course you do," James sighed, shaking his head. "He never keeps anything a secret from you."
"Word of advice: If you're considering something as serious as marriage, you better know what you're getting into, and speaking as someone with about fifteen years under her belt, secrets are not healthy for marriage. Especially if you're both going to be so young."
"We're not going to get married right away. Sophie wants to travel, study some more before we settle down. You and Nell will still have to wait to plan the dream wedding. I just want to ask for her hand during winter break."
"That'll be quite romantic." As soon as Ginny said it, she realized that her son, the same one who used to hide behind her skirt from reindeer at Christmas time and once used her favorite lipstick to write out a birthday card for her, was now old enough to consider taking someone for a wife; the fact that it was the same someone that he had been involved in pretend wedding ceremonies since the age of five made it all the more difficult to comprehend.
"Mum, are you going to cry?"
"No!" She straightened her shoulders to her full height, which was about a head shorter than her son, blinking fast to keep her eyes dry. "I don't cry, not ever. You know that very well."
"Okay then. I'm going to go start loading my things on the train." With a quick hug that ended far too quickly for Ginny, James disappeared back into the crowd.
He would be doing that a lot more from now on, going off on his own and making his own plans for his life. How had it all gone by so fast? To Ginny, it felt like no more than a month or two had passed since he had been a baby, kicking and twirling inside of her, yet in reality he was off to his last year of school, shaving actual hair off his face in the mornings, and getting ready to propose marriage. Every instinct inside of her screamed that he was too young, that it was too soon for him to not need his mother this much, and maybe she was right. Perhaps…
Warm arms wrapped around her chest and tugged her until her back pressed against something solid, her spine relaxing under the beat of a familiar heart.
"He's going to be fine," Harry whispered in her ear. "All three of them will be, I promise."
"You're very confident of that fact every single year."
"And every year I'm right. They've been raised by a wonderful mother." He softly kissed her temple. "So how could they be anything other than wonderful?"
"It's just always hard for the first few weeks after they leave. I put on the brave face for Nell so she doesn't go any crazier and build a dungeon at home to lock poor Gigi in, but I always have the strangest urge when that train pulls away to try and jump on it."
"I do, too."
"They're slipping away a little more as the years go by." She turned in his arms and tucked her head under his chin, burrowing into his chest.
"Yes they are," he sighed.
"Al wants to spend next summer by himself abroad in Beijing at an apothecary. Lily wants dear Phlegm to take her shopping now because I apparently have no sense of fashion. And James…" Ginny groaned, feeling a headache forming at the base of her skull.
"He's a good kid," Harry said, rubbing her back. "He just needs to get focused on the future. Maybe now that it's his last year and he knows that there's no more dawdling and putting things off, he'll get serious."
"And if he doesn't?"
"Sophie will knock the sense into him the same way Nell does for Bart."
Ginny giggled before growing serious again. "Harry, did we let him get away with too much this summer?"
"What do you mean?"
"I mean, the weekends in London with his friends. Letting him practice with the Arrows reserve squad, even though he probably won't get signed, instead of taking a summer job. All that unsupervised time he had with Sophie." She looked up into his eyes; they sparkled with love for her, even if there were a few wrinkles around them nowadays. "Was it too much?"
"Your mum was badgering you at dinner the other night, wasn't she?"
"Perhaps, but perhaps she was also right."
"He checked in with us every morning and night he was in London and even if he doesn't end up playing professionally, he made a lot of good contacts in Quidditch—outside of his famous mum—that will allow him to get a job on someone's staff if that's what he wants to do. As for the other," Harry twirled a finger through her still-shining hair, "I think I would've given almost anything at his age for my biggest problem to be spending too much time with my girl. That's just me, though."
Ginny smiled up at him. He was always the perfect balm for her fear and worries.
"I love you," she told him, going up to her toes to press her lips against his.
"I love you, too." He kept his face close to hers. "And I think-"
"Now that's always dangerous."
"-that maybe some of this melancholy and doubt is actually a bit of guilt over where we will be going off to all by ourselves in a few days' time." His smile became almost lecherous and Ginny blushed a little.
"Harry!"
"Well, there are just not a lot of advantages to being free of one's children for months at a time. We should be grateful for the ones we have, like unencumbered free time to spend at an exotic locale, complete with," Harry let his lips drift down the side of her face, "alcoholic beverages served in coconuts."
"Stop it," she whispered, grinning under his ministrations.
"No Floos from demanding editors or nervous recruits."
"Now you're talking."
His mouth nipped ever so gently at her neck. "Wandering the streets for hours, buying useless, over-priced crap just because we can."
"Naughty, naughty."
"And my personal favorite," his tongue snaked out to lick lightly at her pulse point and her knees threatened to give way, "topless beaches."
Reluctantly she wiggled out his hold and took his hand, leading him back through the throngs of people, trying to settle her racing heart. All these years and children later and her husband could still set her entire being ablaze with a look and a few whispers.
She was the luckiest woman in the world.
"I can't believe I let you talk me into taking another honeymoon with you," she said, leaning against his shoulder.
"Technically, it's the first one."
"No! We went away after we got married, as soon as you were back on your feet."
"We spent a week in Rome. It rained the whole time and we were stuck in a hotel room trying to potty-train James, whom you couldn't bear to leave behind with your mum. Not a honeymoon. Where we're going on Friday? That's a honeymoon."
A loud whistle pierced through the air, alerting all those on the platform that the train would be departing in a few moments, and Ginny sighed, her heart tightening at what was to come.
"Let's go say goodbye to our kids."
They found their way back to their group in time to hear Nell and Bart leaving more instructions with their youngest child.
"…and I will tell you one last time, Georgina Lucas Nixon, that I better receive at least one owl every day from you, do you understand?"
"Yes, Mum."
"Promise me you will hold on tightly to the stair railings," Bart said, kneeling in front of the girl. "They move very suddenly sometimes and I don't want you breaking any bones."
"If you have to go to the Infirmary for any reason, make sure Madame Pomfrey writes down explicitly every treatment, spell, and potion she used on you so I can know exactly what she was trying before I take over."
"Check the bathrooms every time you walk into one. There are ghosts and ghouls at that school and not all of them are of the female persuasion."
"Don't eat strange foods."
"Don't go hang around with boys."
"Don't touch strange creatures."
"Don't touch any part of any boys."
"Do not get piercings on any part of your body."
"Do not go near a boy or a butterfly will die."
"But most importantly," Sophie told her sister, kneeling down beside her near-hysterical parents in front of Gigi, "have lots of fun. I'll miss you."
"I'll miss you all, too." Barely holding back tears, Nell and Bart enveloped their daughters in a giant hug. Just over them, Ron and Hermione were sending Rose and Hugo off with watery eyes of their own and Ginny turned back to her children with a small smile.
"Come on," she told them. "Time for one last squeeze." Albus got another hug from Harry before stepping into Ginny's arms. "Have a great year, sweetheart, and please, just think about-"
"Mum, Jamie's the athlete in our generation, not me."
"You're a fantastic Seeker, though, and I say that as a Quidditch reporter and not as your adoring mother."
"I'm a better potion master. You know when you subbed for Dad as Seeker in school and you caught the Snitch? Remember how you told me your chest felt like afterwards?"
"Of course."
"That's what I feel like every time I funnel a great potion into the vial," he said, pulling back and giving her one of Harry's smiles.
"Fine," she said, smoothing down his impossible hair. "At least promise me that when you go to Hogsmeade with your friends that you'll leave your books in your dorm."
"Deal." He kissed her quickly on the cheek, climbing onto the train as he waved goodbye. "See you at Christmas! Love you!"
"Love you, too. And you," Ginny said, addressing her daughter as Lily sidled up to her. Wrapping her arms around her, Ginny breathed in one last time the hint of Lily's fruit-tinged shampoo. This year might be the last time her daughter was shorter than her. "Watch over both of your brothers for me. I always get nervous when the men in our family are left to their own devices."
"I know. They are quite troublesome, aren't they?"
Ginny choked back a giggle as all of the mischief that Lily had manufactured over the years flashed before her eyes; the girl was half the size of James and had almost doubled his output of trouble. However, since she always ran straight to her father, and since Harry couldn't seem to bear his baby girl's tearful confessions, Lily (mostly) escaped serious punishment. Thankfully, the combination of Hogwarts and age seemed to be tempering her wild nature. This summer especially, Ginny had noticed she was far too busy sketching in her notebook and making plans with Gigi for the fall to be bothered with midnight, unsupervised flights or hiding another stray cat in the attic.
"Be a good girl. And remember, even if your brother doesn't pick you for the Quidditch team, it doesn't mean that he doesn't love you."
"It just means he knows that Quidditch rings are not safe when you're flying near them," James chimed in loudly.
"I was five!" Lily said, glaring at him while Ginny planted a kiss on her head. "And that was the only time I ever crashed, you dumb prat!"
"Lily Luna, mind you language!"
"Well he's being one, Mum!" The girl's cheeks matched her flaming, shoulder-length hair. "What am I supposed to do, pretend he isn't? That's dishonest and you said I'm not allowed to be dishonest."
"You're also not allowed to call your brother that in front of me. Even when he is being one," she said, looking pointedly at James. "I want you both to get along at school. It's the last year you'll all be together." She pressed her forehead against Lily's. "Believe me, you'll miss this time when it's gone."
"Muuum…Come on, Gigi and I need to go get good seats away from the Slytherins."
"Okay, okay." Ginny relented and let Lily go. "I don't want you two girls up all night talking in the dorm. You're there to study, not have a year-long sleepover."
"Fine! Goodbye, I love you, and I'll be good until winter!" Lily walked over to the Nixons and helped free Gigi from their grasp, Nell and Bart rising with their eyes quite moist as the two young girls boarded the train, happily chatting together as their adventure began.
"You know I'm going to pick her regardless," James smirked, tilting Ginny's chin up to him. "Even if she couldn't throw the Quaffle more than five feet, I'd still pick my little sister over anyone else out there."
"We know," Harry said, wrapping an arm around James, standing almost shoulder to shoulder with him. "But she'll appreciate it more if she thinks she really earned it. Right, luv?"
"I can't believe this is it," Ginny said, ignoring her husband and speaking to James. "I can't believe this is your last year of school."
"If you want, I can flunk out; repeat this year if that'll make you-"
"Mark my words, young man, if you finish that sentence I will take you over my knee and spank you in front of everyone here. Including your girlfriend," Ginny warned.
"She's not kidding, mate," Harry said. "You know how she gets when her voice sounds like that."
"Yes, I do."'
"My voice does not change when I'm…" Ginny trailed off, her throat closing in as she took in her husband and son in front of her. Harry still had a little height on James, but not by much, probably because James's dark hair was much tamer than his father's. There was naturally more Weasley in the younger man's features as well yet as soon as he started being able to master his Almet abilities to morph his face at the age of twelve, James had been forbidden by his father to change his eyes in any way. He wanted his oldest son to live only with the eyes Ginny had given him and he had. They stared at her now questioningly before he offered her a sad smile as she gathered herself together once more.
Harry took Ginny's hand and pulled her closer, wrapping them all together in a hug. Ginny would never say she loved her oldest more than her others nor did she actually feel that way, but she couldn't deny that there was a bond between herself, Harry, and James that was different from Al and Lily. Without James, she was certain that she and Harry never would have found their back to each other. It was, after all, because of his unexpected life that their family had been created in the first place.
James let go of his parents first. He always did now while Ginny threaded her hand through his to maintain the connection. "Mum, go easy on the Arrows in the column, okay? Hamlin's only a rookie. You can't expect him to be the kind of Keeper Jarvis was. Dad…just stay safe. Let the kids handle all the heavy lifting and bad guy catching," he said, easing away from them.
"I'll try," Harry called back. "Enjoy the year, mate. We're very proud of you. Right, luv?"
Ginny could only nod for fear of bursting into sobs.
"See you in a few months, then." Finally, James was too far away to hold onto his mother without dragging her behind him and he released her hand, turning away from his parents to plant a chaste goodbye kiss on Sophie's lips, under her father's watchful eye, before leaping onto the train with a flourish as his classmates waved goodbye to their families. Hanging outside the door as the train pulled away slowly, he shouted out, "Fair thee well, good parents of Hogwarts youth, and remember this: Should a pink lizard ever ask you for directions to the local grocer's, run away fast and swift as talking animals have quite the odorous breath!" It was a tradition he had started his very first year, crying out something absurd and humorous to the crowd before he left for school. He bowed deeply to the laughter and quizzical looks and disappeared into the train.
"Our son is quite the character," Harry said.
"Yes, he is." It was then she realized that the hand James had been holding was still in midair, waiting for him. She started to lower it to her side, until Harry took it and brought it to his lips. Ron and Hermione were already waving their goodbyes towards Harry and Ginny while Nell followed the train down the tracks, shouting out for Gigi to stay in her seat. "Take me home, Mr. Potter. No lunches or drinks with grown-ups. I think I just want to pull out baby pictures and cry for a few hours."
"Sounds like fun," he said, leading her away towards the portal that would take them back to the Muggle side of King's Cross Station. "Of course I know a much better way to take your mind off of the kids leaving."
"What's that?"
Harry only raised his eyebrows at her; after a moment, her lips managed to turn into a small smile.
Hours later, after the moon traded places with the sun, Ginny snuggled back against the sheets of her bed, her bare skin finally beginning to cool down.
He was right, she thought, her eyes lingering on Harry's chest as he breathed deep and steady, having just succumbed to sleep. That was much more fun than what I had in mind.
It helped ease her grief that they hadn't done that in quite some time. For sure, there were stolen moments when the kids were busy, or quick romps when they both fell into bed after work, almost too tired to see what they were doing, but eight or nine hours to devote just to one another was a rarity in their busy lives. With only a few stops for catnaps or bites of food, Harry had shown her just how much he had missed this aspect of their relationship while she had shown him what she had learned from a certain article in Witch Weekly's annual Amorous Adventures issue.
It was times like these when Ginny was certain that no one in the world was luckier than she. Her children were strong and brilliant, all with kind hearts; her parents and brothers were all in good health; she had good friends who gave her comfort and laughter when she needed it and a job that challenged her just as much today as when she had started. Most importantly, she had Harry beside her to share it all with. He was everything to her, the piece of her heart that could push her forward when everything seemed ready to collapse around her, even on the rare occasions that they struggled with one another. Harry was her strength just as Ginny knew she was his. Their partnership was as close to perfect as it could be, and after all they labored through to come together in the first place, they savored what they had accomplished.
Draping herself across her husband, Ginny placed a kiss over his heart and closed her own eyes, hoping she'd see Harry there splayed out on a beach in her dreams.
And in a few days, it'll be a reality, she told herself with a smile.
If she had gone anywhere in her subconscious, it wasn't anywhere she could remember. The loud flapping of wings pulled her out of sleep slowly, but it was Harry straightening up suddenly in bed and gently pushing her off his body that truly woke her.
"What is it?" she grumbled, waving her hand to light the room against the black night streaming in from the windows, and watching Harry stand at the foot of the bed to retrieve a letter with his wand at the ready. Always the Auror, her husband. The cream of their bedroom walls was blinding in the bright light, and she covered her head with the sheet.
"Ginny," he said slowly.
"It better not be the Ministry. You're the head of your department; it's not appropriate for them to be sending you things at this hour anymore, unless it's an emergency which we know it's not-"
"Ginny…"
"-because your lackey, Milton, would be screaming bloody murder through the Floo, waking everyone within twenty miles. Besides, you're on vacation. They shouldn't bother you with-"
"Ginny, it's not from work."
"Then who is it…" A chill she couldn't understand enveloped her as she realized where a letter contacting them this late would come from and she inched out of the safety of the bed to stare at Harry's face, ashen like she had only seen him a very few times. "The school? T-The kids?"
Her voice sparked him into action and bent to pick up his discarded clothing, throwing things on haphazardly as he answered. "James. He's in the Infirmary. Neville said he needs us at Hogwarts right now."
She leapt from the bed, grabbing for stray articles of clothing, not caring if they were hers or Harry's.
James…My baby…Oh Godric, my baby…
Even if it was only less than ten seconds or so, it was the longest Floo travel of Ginny's whole life. Her feet had barely touched the solid stone floors of her alma mater before she raced off out of the Headmaster's office towards the Infirmary, Harry by her side, as a young man with the badge of the Head Boy followed, trying to get their attention, but they paid him no mind. When they reached the double doors of the Infirmary, they each grabbed a handle and pulled, stumbling into the room, their hearts racing with a fear they had never known.
Certainly, the children had all been sick at one time or another at school; Al had even broken his ankle last year during Halloween, but the maladies had always been so mild that neither Harry's nor Ginny's presence was ever required at the school. Until now. For something like this, for something that needed them to come flying here in the middle of the night, it must be something she couldn't imagine, even as her brain tried to bombard her with pictures of ripped flesh and oozing blood.
Such horror was on her mind that Ginny almost cried out with joy when she saw her son lying on one of the crisp beds. Ignoring Neville and the elderly matron he was speaking to, Ginny went straight to her son and knelt beside him, tears slipping down her cheeks as she saw his chest rise and fall.
He's alive, she though gratefully, running her hand through his hair; in slumber it was the dark auburn of his birth. Behind her, she felt Harry's hands on her shoulders, squeezing tightly. He's breathing and he's alive. Everything else can be fixed.
"Harry, Ginny." She heard Neville speak from the foot of the bed and she tore her eyes away from her son to see her old friend, now the newly-appointed headmaster of the school, smiling softly. There was more gray in his hair than there had been when she had last seen him in May. It only made the seriousness of his eyes seem even deeper. "I'm sorry to call you here like this in the middle of the night."
"What happened to him?" Harry asked. "Is he ill? Poisoned or cursed? Are Al and Lily alright?"
"They're fine. We sent them back to their dorm after we found James."
"Found him?" Ginny's brow furrowed. "What do you mean? He was missing?"
"Yes, he was. The Head Boy reported it after the feast was over. James hadn't been at the Gryffindor table, and when we asked the students, no one had seen him since the train. The teachers, the Prefects, and I began conducting a thorough search of the grounds. We were just about to notify you when we received a Patronus from Rosmerta at the Three Broomsticks. She found James in her cellar, unconscious and in a puddle of Firewhiskey."
"W-What are you talking about?" Ginny fought to understand, glancing back at her husband in shock. "James doesn't drink. He could barely hold down the shot he took on his seventeenth birthday. Why would he-?" She looked back at her son, hating with a fury how pale he was. "Why would he do something like getting drunk at school?"
"It was more than just a few drinks, Gin," Neville corrected as gently as he could. "When we got him back here to be examined, he was having trouble breathing." Harry gasped in shock and Ginny could hardly breathe herself. "Madame Pomfrey detected that he had a dangerous amount of alcohol in his blood. She worked quickly and was able to extract most of it before it could do any permanent damage. He'll be weak for a few days, but he should make a full recovery."
"Why?" Harry said helplessly, sliding down to sit on the bed next his son's legs. "What could make him…?"
Neville closed his eyes and reached into the pocket of his robes.
"This," he said, holding out a folded letter, "was in his hand when we found him. It was given to him on the train by Peter Barkley. He's-"
"He's a friend of James's. They're on the Quidditch team together and they spent a few weekends in London in this summer with two other boys." Ginny eyed the letter warily. "What does it say?"
"I think it's best if you read it for yourself." Slowly, Harry took the letter and opened it, staring intently at his wife for a moment before he began to read the words that had driven their son into such a state. Unable to bear the silence, Ginny took James's limp hand in hers, kissing it over and over again.
Why had he let go earlier at the train station? No, no, he was the child. She was the mother. Why had she let him let go? Why had she let this happen to her son?
"I love you, sweetheart," she told him. It was all she could offer him at the moment, her love, yet it seemed horribly inadequate. "Mummy's here now. Everything will be fine." He didn't stir and she shuddered slightly at his stillness.
"He's only sedated, Ginny," she heard Neville try to comfort her. "He'll be awake soon enough. His body just needed rest to-"
"This can't be," Harry whispered, blinking at the paper. "This…This…"
Caught in between the vicious tug of not knowing and knowing, Ginny finally reached out and grabbed the paper for herself, forcing her eyes to focus on the words in front of her.
Dear James,
I don't know if you remember me from London. My name is Kerri and we met at that pub that you and your friends snuck into in July. I was the girl that Pete knew from his neighborhood, the one you said had on shoes taller than your little sister. You were already a bit tipsy by then. Anyway, we talked that whole night and you came back with me to my flat. You were already gone when I woke up in the morning.
I'm sure you thought you'd never hear from me again just as I was sure I'd never think of you as anything other than a one night fling, except that something else came of our one night together: I'm pregnant.
I know that you're still in boarding school and from what Pete said you have a steady girl. This is probably the last thing in the world you want to hear about, but you need to know because whatever I decide to do, I'll need your help, whether it's having the baby or…or not. I'm still not sure yet which is why we need to talk. Pete knows how to get in touch with me when you're ready. Please be ready soon because the decision needs to be made. I can't take living my life with this uncertainty for much longer.
I'm so sorry we did this to ourselves.
Sincerely,
Kerri Smithfield
"It's not true," Ginny said firmly as soon as she was done reading. She put the letter on the bedside table, out of her sight and tried to push the horrible words out of her mind along with it. "She's lying, whoever this girl is. She's a liar. Or it's a trick. A…A prank his friends were playing on him that went too far."
"Maybe someone trying to hurt me through him," Harry wondered out loud. "Maybe an old Voldemort supporter or someone I arrested recently."
Neville was quiet for a long moment before he asked, "How can you both be sure it's not true?"
"Because he's been in love with the same girl since was seven years old. Because he'd never betray her or try to hurt her by doing something like this. Because this is not what we raised him to be, so it has…" Ginny stopped talking as Neville's gaze left hers briefly. "What is it?"
"Spit it out, Longbottom," Harry added when Neville stayed quiet, rising to his feet.
"It's just," the headmaster tried to explain, looking down at his shoes, "when he's here at school, he…he flirts. A lot. With a lot of different girls."
"So he's friendly," Ginny said, straightening her son's bedcovers. "He's always been friendly. There's nothing wrong with that. It doesn't mean he got some girl that we've never met pregnant."
"Sometimes it's more than flirting." Ginny squeezed her eyes shut, wishing she could do the same to her ears as Neville continued. "Sometimes it's a girl giving him a quick victory kiss after a match. Sometimes it's him and another girl sitting too close together in a secluded corner of the library. Sometimes it's catching him and yet another girl in a broom cupboard or an empty classroom with wrinkled clothing."
"Stop talking," Ginny ground out, her hands still on the bedcovers, trembling with rage as she glared at her friend. Harry stalked past Neville to stare blankly out a window.
He wasn't lying to them. Ginny, her anger at him abating as quickly as it had come, knew that, with all they'd been through, Neville would never lie to them, but how she wished he would, because hearing and accepting the truth seemed to be far worse than any lie. Her son, her wonderful son whom she adored beyond reason, was something else than she had ever imagined him to be. That he could be so careless with the feelings of someone he claimed to love was painful, physically painful to the point where Ginny thought she'd be sick. Because it was too much to bear, knowing these things about her son. It made him seem callous and cruel, something she had never, ever wanted him to be.
It made him seem like someone Ginny had vowed he would never be.
"He's not a bad kid. He's not at all. There are students here who do far worse than him. I just think in James's mind that whatever happens here at school doesn't count for anything real."
"Well, it is real," Harry said, coming back to them. There was no anger on his face, only defeat. "It's very real and it seems that he'll be dealing with the consequences of his actions soon enough."
"Yes, he will," Neville agreed. "Unfortunately, some of those consequences are going to be administered by me. He left the school without permission and got intoxicated. That's grounds for expulsion."
"Is that what you'll do?" Ginny asked quietly from her place by her son.
Neville tapped his fingers against the brass bedpost, deep in thought. "He's suspended for a week," he finally said. "You two can take him home to Hastom so he can recuperate there and try to get everything sorted out with this girl. When that's been addressed, if he still wants to, James can return to Hogwarts, but he'll be kept on probation for the remainder of the year. That means no Hogsmeade visits and no activities, including Quidditch."
"Thank you." Ginny knew it was probably more than James had a right to under the circumstances, but at least he had a chance at preserving his education and his future.
As spotty as that future appeared to be at the moment.
"You're welcome." Neville kissed the top of her head and held out his hand for Harry to shake. "Madame Pomfrey cleared him to leave whenever you're ready. She's already sending some potions to your house, which he'll need to take when he wakes up. One of you should also stay with him for the night to monitor his breathing just in case. You also should stay close to him in case…in case this wasn't just an isolated incident or drinking too much on accident. And he should be checked over by his regular healer in a couple of days."
His regular healer is the mother of the girl he's apparently been stepping out on. Not so sure he should be in a room with Nell and sharp instruments for the foreseeable future.
Ginny was sure it would have been hilarious if it wasn't so awful.
"Thanks. Can you please tell Al and Lily we'll write to them tomorrow?"
"Sure, Harry. If there's anything else I can do to help, just let me know." With that, he left the Potters alone in the dark Infirmary with their son and their ever-darkening thoughts.
"She sounds Muggle," Harry said after a time.
Ginny wiped her red eyes with both hands and looked over at him. "What?"
"The girl. The one…The one who wrote the letter. She sounds Muggle."
"How do you figure?"
"If she was a witch, she would've written James herself or used the Floo or contacted him through some other means. If she had to go through Peter, it probably means she's not magical. She may not even know anything about our world."
"And that matters because?"
"It might later on if she decides to keep…keep the child."
"We don't know for sure that she really is pregnant, and even if she is, it might not be his."
"It's something we need to talk about."
"No it isn't. Not right now. We just need to get James home," Ginny said, getting slowly to her feet.
"And then what?"
"I don't know."
"We need to try and figure-"
"I need him home, Harry!" Ginny exclaimed, her voice bouncing off the still walls as all of the tension of the past hour erupted out of her. "I need him home under my roof where I know he's safe and he can't hurt himself again! That's the only thing we need to concern ourselves with! I don't care about nine months or nine days or nine fucking minutes from now, I just need to take my son home! Do you understand?!"
Her husband aged ten years during her outburst. When her breathing was finally under control again, he pulled her to him and crushed her until she sagged against him.
"I have absolutely no idea how yet," Harry whispered to her in a trembling voice, "but we're all going to get through this. Okay?"
Please don't be lying to me, luv. I won't survive it if you're wrong.
"Okay," she said out loud.
They held on to each other for some time before Harry finally pulled back, stopping to use his thumbs to wipe underneath her eyes. When he was finished, he stepped closer to their son and bent over to pick him up from the bed.
"Don't you want to use a spell or-"
"I've got him," Harry grunted, easing up slowly as he struggled to balance the weight of his almost fully-grown son in his arms. "I've got him, Gin." Together, they walked slowly out towards the nearest fireplace to head home.
It had been perfect. Her whole life, the entirety of her existence, had been perfect only a few hours ago and now it was as far from that as one could get.
And the unraveling had only just begun.