Baby's on fire

Disclaimer: I don't own Curt, Mandy, Trevor, Cecil or any of the other original characters who may appear in later chapters. I also do not own the Sombrero club. The lyrics belong to the Venus in Furs and Good Charlotte.

(some lyrics are out of order because…well, they just worked better that way – sorry to rabid GC fans)

Rated for language, drug abuse and possible sexual content in later chapters.

A/N: I realize that it is sacrilegious to combine the glory of Velvet Goldmine with Good Charlotte but it just seemed to fit so perfectly! Flame me if you wish. I probably deserve burning at the stake for such heresy.

"If you'll be my flotsam

I could be half the man I used to

They said you were hot stuff

And that's what baby's been reduced to"

Spend your lazy, endless, crazy days inside my head

Mandy greeted him with a bright smile, her best polished façade, but it didn't disguise the red rims around her eyes. The only thing around his eyes was black eyeliner and the purple stains of a month without sleep. Writing, play, getting drunk and getting laid. The constant activity was beginning to tell. When Mandy broke out of his hug, it was to glare at him reproachfully. "You smell of perfume."

"Mandy, I'm a blinking Fairy boy. I'm not allowed to wear perfume?"

She didn't seem convinced. "Don't give me that crap. Who was she?"

"He." He corrected her, without missing a beat. The sharp response caught Mandy off balance and made her pause. It wasn't that she was surprised, merely that she had not expected any answer at all.

"He, then."

Curt took a deep breath and prepared himself for the abuse that was sure to follow his answer. Of course, he could have simply refused to tell her but the strange power that she held over him would not allow it.

"Trevor."

Mandy's expression mutated from surprise, to disbelief, to disgust in less than ten seconds. "I can't believe you! Trevor? Brian's guitarist, Trevor?"

He nodded.

"How could you do that? You knew how Brian felt about him!"

Yeah, he did. Curt shrugged. "Well, he's not really in a position to do much about it now, is he?"

The spite in her voice was almost more than Curt's aching head could stand. "You didn't even give Brian a single thought, did you? How could you have? You were too busy screwing him over! Do you have no respect?"

You're so selfish; you're not the only one who thinks he's dead

There was no use in trying to explain. He was probably the only one in the World who knew how Brian had really felt about Trevor, who could tell the reality from the publicity crap. The superstar had thought he was an annoying little prick, not to mention a crap shag. On one of those points, at least, Curt rather disagreed. The guy was absorbing and that was really all Curt needed right now. Heroin and alcohol didn't seem enough any more, not on their own, not to replace Brian…

He got up and left. She looked after him, new tears forming in her eyes. She could not lose him too, not when he was her only link to the star she could not forget.

I'm paid to smile; now, I'm on trial for what you think I said

Out in the street, cold air hit him forcibly in the face. Far from refreshing, though, it sent an empty chill through his bones leaving them aching for warmth. Curt had never been warm alone. The stage stunts, surrounded by leaping flames, had all been a part of his need for a heat that would not come from inside. Brian had been hot…like blue fire, Curt remembered. Each time Curt had touched him, the burn had seared a little deeper until every inch of Curt, body and soul, was wrapped in a blazing azure pyre.

Now, he was cold. And dead, stale smoke choked him from within.

When I fall down would you come around and pick me right up off the ground?

Curt headed home, through the grey London streets, drawing conservative stares and badly concealed whispers. He couldn't remember why he'd chosen London over New York but here he was, and he wasn't planning on leaving any time soon. He kicked the door to his flat open and slung his jacket on the floor. No one could understand why a megastar would live in a broken down dump like this. He didn't care. Almost everything he wanted or needed was here. Luxury couldn't give him the things that were missing.

He dropped down on the floor and took a small plastic bag from his pocket. Pulling the rest of his stuff towards him, he lit the candle and tapped a little of the powder into a metal spoon. He watched it melt far too slowly as he dangled it in the dancing flame.

Lifeless eyes flared with ecstasy as the drug hit his bloodstream. God, the stuff was pure as snow.

I never said that everything would be ok. And I never said that we would live to see another day.

A/N: -huggles Curt- the lyrics will not be good charlotte forever I promise although they probably will be next chapter, I'm not done with this song yet. Read and review people! People? Ok…there's no one there…damn.

Cookies and important roles in my universal take-over up for grabs to reviewers! –bribes shamelessly-