I fake I am sleeping. I close my eyes for a second. We are on bed for ten minutes or more, I guess. We are attached to each other as we are since my doubt has born. Never be with someone else on bed, I never shared my sleeping time with anyone. In Wammy House, I was supposed to be sleeping with the other kids, but Watari knew my need to be lonely.
Through cold arms and shoulders my long and skinny fingers run. I feel his sweet pale skin, I taste him with my lips and I get confused about his temperature. He seems too cold, but his body is hot, it is like a fever. I don't care sharing this bed with him. He is small even he is as tall as me. He is fragile and innocent even he is elder than me. It feels so strange...
I would ever think about feeling the contact of warm lips against my skin. Even on my arms or whenever... my lips. I turn my face against his, I am still faking I am sleeping - my eyes are calm and closed. Besides, my lips are shivering, like my teeth are supposed to fall and my face was supposed to get on fire. I breath in, I breath out... So softly, so slowly, so deeply.
I got little surprised when he moved so suddenly. I got further, I tried to do something to fake I was sleeping or doing something else. Too late, I guess. Maybe I was too stupid to didn't see he is not sleeping ether. My smile is soft, just a movement from the corner of my lips. Ironicaly how I didn't care he was faking too. I would be faking again, now that I am touching his face while I am getting closer to it.
I feel it. I feel the body movement on the bed. His breathe... It is closer and louder, faster and it is getting a smell. A fresh smell. He is what I can call... unbelievable. My eyes could not be quiet, my thoughts were mixed and my head moved automatically. I was able to go after him, to get closer to him.
He had fallen on my treat. I laugh inside, I feel pleasant to see how he reacts. My fingers run easily over his face, they touch now his dry lips. "Ryuuzaki" I whisper, then his eyes are opened, facing me and my soul. He sees how sick I am. My face is able to tell him this, so my moves do. I close his mouth with this same hand. I have fast movements, I run the chains of the handcuffs around his fists, together now, over his head.
What the hell is he doing with me? I was supposed to think we were able to... No. I was thinking we were just on our sleeping time and we... Now I am scared. Now I am seeing myself under Light's body. His legs are around my wist and one of his hands, the one that was on my mouth went down, invading my chest, making me shiver. "What are you doing?" I whisper, scared about waking up someone else.
"Shh" I say. Too curious for a prey. That night he asked me. That night I gave what he wanted. We were one, but I was the One, while he was just myself. I saw myself on him and I saw that college-like Light, while I was just Kira, who he wanted me to be, who he knows I am.
That was Kira and he wanted to kill the rest of Light he had. That moment I saw... I loved Light, but I wanted Kira.